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Authors: Mark Schweizer

BOOK: The Bass Wore Scales
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I guess that Mrs. Kilroy would be a good place to start,” I said.


So,” Nancy said, “where do we quarantine this gorilla?”


Fish and Game said to take him to the nearest animal facility. That’d be up here, I guess. Doesn’t St. Germaine have an animal shelter?”

I nodded. “Behind Gwen Jackson’s veterinary practice. There are several big enclosures. She’s kept black bears back there occasionally.”


Then let’s take him over there,” said McCay. “It’s only for a few days.”


And I’m going to want to be there as well,” said Dr. Pelicane. “I presume that there’s somewhere I can park the motor home.”


We’ll ask Dr. Jackson,” I said. “But I can’t imagine that there’d be a problem.”


I’ll just ask Kokomo what happened when he wakes up,” said Dr. Pelicane. “He’ll explain everything.”


Huh?” said Burt.


Oh, yeah,” I said. “This is a talking gorilla.”


That gorilla can talk?” exclaimed Burt. “Holy Moses!”

* * *

With Kokomo asleep, I went over to the pool, fished the body to the side, spun him over in the water and looked down on the face of Brother Jimmy Kilroy.


It’s Kilroy, all right,” I said. “I was pretty sure already, but, yeah. That’s him.”

Todd McCay and I pulled him out of the tepid water and laid him out on the cold tile.


Looks like his neck is broken,” said Kent. “But I’ll still have to do a work-up.”

I nodded. “You’re the best coroner around. Do it as quickly as you can.”


I’ll get to work as soon as I get the body to the lab. Did you call the ambulance?”


Already done,” said Nancy.

The ambulance drove up to the church, lights blazing and siren wailing. The two EMTs on duty were Mike and Joe. Nancy had been dating Mike, off and on, for about a year, and she adjusted the jacket around her waist when she saw him.


Hi, Nance,” he called, as he and Joe got the gurney out of the back of the truck. “No hurry on this one, I guess. I heard he was going to Kent’s office.”


Yeah,” said Nancy. “The vic’s inside. And when you’re finished, we need some help carrying the gorilla.”


What gorilla?” asked Joe.


The one that’s asleep in the bathroom.”


You know, Nancy,” said Mike, “I love it up here in St. Germaine.”

* * *

It took all six of us to put Kokomo in the back of my truck. Nancy called Gwen Jackson, found out there was a cage available and told her we were on our way. Kent and Dr. Pelicane drove back to Boone to pack up the motor home and bring it over. When they left, Nancy and I got into my truck. Sergeant McCay and Burt Coley were going to follow us to Dr. Jackson’s to help unload Kokomo.


Hey boss,” said Nancy, once we’d pulled out of the parking lot. “Where does a five hundred pound gorilla sleep?”


We’ve gotta change our pants,” I answered.

Chapter 12

After we dropped a still sleeping Kokomo at Dr. Jackson’s place, I called the Slab and made arrangements for Noylene and Collette to meet me down at the station. I figured they knew what was going on and, if they weren’t directly involved, could at the very least give us some idea of what Brother Kilroy was up to. I had to drive Nancy back to the New Fellowship Baptist Church to pick up her motorcycle.


What a morning,” I said. “Why don’t you go home, change your clothes and then come on back here and see if you can find anything that might be helpful. Go over what’s left of the crime scene.”


It seems pretty cut and dried to me.”


Yeah, it does, but check it out anyway. That’s why they pay us the big bucks. Let’s get in there before any church folks start going through his papers. Who knows what secrets Brother Kilroy was privy to?”


Will do.”

* * *

I met Noylene and Collette at the station, both of them as pale as Casper’s bedsheet. The grapevine in St. Germaine was as fast and effective as any other small town, and both women had already heard the news.


C’mon in,” I said, motioning them into my office. “I’ll bet you two can fill me in on a few missing details.”


I jes’ can’t believe it,” said Collette, barely containing her tears. “Brother Kilroy…gone.”


He was a good man,” said Noylene, dabbing at one eye with a handkerchief.


Sure,” I said. “Now tell me what happened. And don’t pretend you don’t know. I saw you two swapping glances the other afternoon.”

The two women looked at each other for a long moment.


Well,” began Noylene finally. She stopped talking, then sighed and finally continued. “Well, Brother Kilroy and Rev. Garridos have been arguing about that gorilla for days. I never should have asked Kokomo if he loved Jesus.”


It warn’t your fault,” sniffed Collette. “You was jes’ trying to help that poor dumb creature.”


So Brother Kilroy felt…” I waited for Noylene to finish the sentence.


That Kokomo was intelligent, and if he accepted Jesus, he deserved to be saved,” finished Noylene. “But Rev. Garridos said that it was foolishness. That God’s grace was for humans and not for monkeys.”


So where is Rev. Garridos?”


He went back to Spain yesterday afternoon. His month was up.”


Okay. So tell me what happened.”


I don’t know for sure,” continued Noylene. “But I do know that Brother Kilroy had been going over to see Kokomo. Three or four times I think, I went with him once. He kept feeding Kokomo Milk Duds that he’d sneak in to the trailer.”


Did Brother Kilroy say anything to Kokomo while you were there with them?”


Well, sure. Brother Kilroy kept talking to him about Jesus. You know, turning away from sin and keeping love in your heart.”


Okay,” I said. “What happened last night?”

Noylene looked over at Collette, and the younger girl broke down.


Oh, why? Why? Why? Why?” Collette blubbered.


I don’t know what happened for sure,” said Noylene. “Are we in trouble?”


Not yet,” I said, impatience creeping into my voice. “But you both may be soon if I don’t get some answers!”


Waahhhh,” sobbed Collette. “Brother Kilroy took Kokomo to baptize him,” she blurted out. “He said Kokomo deserved all of God’s Grace, and he couldn’t have it unless he was baptized a new creature in the Lord.”


So he went over to baby-sit Kokomo…” I said, once again leading the witness.

Collette sniveled. “And when Dr. Pelicane went out, he took Kokomo out to his car and drove him over to the church. He said it would only take about an hour. The water was already in the pool, and all Brother Kilroy had to do was lead Kokomo into the pool and dunk him under the water.”


And the gorilla didn’t want to be dunked.”


I guess not,” Collette sniffed. “And now Brother Kilroy’s dead. Gone straight to heaven and into the waiting arms of Jesus.”


Did either of you have anything to do with taking the gorilla?” I asked. Both women shook their heads.


Brother Kilroy didn’t want any help. He said he could do this all by himself,” said Noylene. “I guess it was a good thing we weren’t there. That gorilla would have killed us all.”

* * *

It was late in the afternoon before I made it over to Kent Murphee’s office. We didn’t have a coroner in St. Germaine, and Kent covered all of Watauga County. He was sitting at his desk when I walked in, filling out reports, a pen in one hand and his pipe clenched tightly between his teeth. Kent was dressed in his usual attire—tweed jacket, vest and tie.


How about a drink?” asked Kent. “It’s been a long day.”


Yeah, okay,” I said, slumping into the chair opposite him. “Anything to report on the Kilroy case?”

Kent pushed my drink across his desk. “Well, I can tell you the cause of death. He drowned.”


He drowned?”


That’s what killed him. Of course, he also had a broken neck, a four-inch laceration on his scalp and a subdural hematoma.”


So let me get this straight. He got whacked in the head, then broke his neck and laid in the water till he drowned?”


I’m pretty sure, although the order could have been different. There’s no real way to tell. He could have had his neck broken, then been whacked, and then drowned.”


But the drowning killed him?”


Yeah. He had water in his lungs.”


Wouldn’t the broken neck kill him?” I asked.

Kent shook his head. “Not necessarily. I doubt that he was conscious though. The shot to his head was a doozy. It would have knocked him cold. That is to say, if his neck wasn’t already broken when it happened.”


So, it looks as though the gorilla is responsible.”


It’s not for me to say, but it appears to be the case. There weren’t any bruises on the body though. Just the one head injury and the broken neck.”


How’s Penelope doing?” I asked.


Not very well. She’s been on the phone all day explaining to her department head why the world’s most famous gorilla is now at the St. Germaine animal shelter.”


Has she moved her motor home over there yet?


She’s on the way, I think. I talked to her about an hour ago.”


I’ll go by and check on her when I get back to town.”


I’d appreciate that,” said Kent. “You know, gorillas usually don’t have a problem with water like chimps do. Kilroy probably would have been fine if he hadn’t tried to hold him under.”


No kidding.”

* * *

I got back in my truck and put a Muddy Waters CD into the changer. This had been a day I wouldn’t soon forget, and I was ready to listen to the blues. Not the blues written by a guy named Chad who’s girl-friend, Jennifer, died during a liposuction treatment, but the real thing—and Muddy was as real as it got.

The meanest woman I most ever seen

I asked for water. She brought me gasoline.

By the time I had gotten back to St. Germaine, I felt a whole lot better. The Blues will do that for you. Meg and Pete were waiting for me at the Slab when I walked in. Meg had ordered me a burger, and it was delivered just as I sat down at the table.

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