Authors: Sally Goldenbaum
Nick nodded. “How about if I bring her out next weekend?”
Footsteps in the hallway caught the attention of all three adults, and they looked toward the door as a large woman in a gray dress filled the space.
“Nanny Jenkins, you’re right on time,” Abbie said pleasantly.
“Ma’am, Mr. Melrose, Mr. Harrington.” She nodded politely to each person, then stepped aside for her charge to enter.
A small girl dressed in a pretty sailor dress and tights, her black hair flowing down her straight back and her eyes large and luminous, walked slowly into the room.
“Nell—” Nick started to rise, but the little girl politely walked over to him instead. She placed one hand on his knee, lifted herself on tiptoe, and carefully placed a kiss on his cheek.
“Hello, Father.”
“Hello, Nell.” Nick reached for her and pulled her up onto his lap.
Abbie smiled over at her granddaughter. “It’s a beautiful day, Nell. What would you like to do with your daddy?” She was looking more and more like Nick, Abbie thought, with those dark, smoky eyes and thick black hair. But she had her mother’s lovely skin, a tea-room complexion, smooth like fine porcelain. She was a beautiful little girl, and Abbie’s heart swelled with love every time she looked at her.
Nell smiled. “Horses?”
She was so shy around Nick, it pained Abbie, but it was understandable. She hardly knew him. That pained Abbie even more. Nell needed a father, and Abbie wondered how much longer it would take for her to get one. There was a note of hope, however. In the past few weeks Nick had been out to see Nell several times, and that was so far out of the ordinary that even the servants had noticed.
“Why don’t I take her out alone?” Nick said.
Abbie glanced at Stan in surprise, then looked back at Nick. “Certainly, Nick. Why, that’s a grand
idea. It’s a little chilly for us out there, anyway, I should think.”
Stan winked at Nell. “You show your dad around, sweetheart. I don’t believe he’s seen the new barn yet.”
Nell crawled off Nick’s lap and looked over at her nanny, who was still standing quietly in the doorway. “ ’Bye, Nanny. I’m going with him.”
Nick watched the tiny child carefully. She lisped a little when she talked; he’d never noticed that before. He wondered what other things he’d never noticed. There were probably hundreds. He thought of Mickey Sullivan skipping across the fields at the Thorne Estate, and Bridget’s mob of kids chattering and laughing with bright eyes, their pockets full of cookies. Did Nell chatter and laugh? Maybe when he wasn’t around, which was nearly all the time, and when she was with her grandparents or her nanny.
“Ready?” He smiled down into the child’s serious, dark eyes.
“Yes,” she said softly, again with that hint of a lisp, and she reached with small, curled fingers for his hand.
Hours later, over a dinner served on an elegantly set table beside wide French doors, as they watched the sun set over the hills behind the house, Nick suggested to Abbie that he bring Halley for dinner the next night, rather than waiting until the weekend.
Abbie and Stan thought that was a wonderful idea, and Abbie insisted that she could call Halley herself to arrange a time.
Nick drove home with the windows open, speeding down the nearly empty highway with the moon hanging ominously above him.
Both his mind and his heart were full to the point of pain. There were so many things to sort out, to
put in place, and overriding everything was the intensity of his love for Halley Finnegan and the fear that he might lose her.
How could Halley, who drew children to her like a magnet and loved them so unquestioningly, whose whole upbringing was based on dishing out love to anyone who needed it—how could she ever understand him giving up his own child for others to raise, suspending his love, living in a vacuum?
Perhaps if she had known from the beginning … But it hadn’t been an issue then. It hadn’t been relevant, not until now. Not until his life focus had shifted from mindless distraction to loving. To loving Halley. To bringing Nell back into his life.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow it would all get sorted out.
“It’s important, Nick. You know that, or I wouldn’t ask you to go. Your presence there will make all the difference.” The older man pressed his hands on the edge of Nick’s desk and leaned forward.
“I know, George.” Nick sat back and ran one hand tiredly through his hair. Even Halley’s voice on the telephone before he went to bed the previous night and her enthusiasm over Stan and Abbie’s dinner invitation hadn’t been enough to entice sleep. And the last thing he wanted to do that day was fly to Chicago to work out bank problems. Hell, he was having enough problems handling his own life.
“The meeting is first thing in the morning. We can be back here by late afternoon.” George looked at him carefully. “And whatever is causing those wrinkles in your forehead, Nick, I sure hope she’s worth it!”
Nick half smiled. “You can bet your fortune on it, and I guess I’d better call her to tell her our dinner date is off.”
George chuckled. “Don’t worry, Nick, if she’s as
terrific as that look on your face indicates, she’ll be here when you get back.”
Nick nodded and reached for the phone as George walked out of the room.
Halley hid her disappointment as best she could. “Well, at least I know you really have a job,” she said jokingly. “There were days there when I seriously doubted it.”
“You thought I was a plastic playboy, that’s it.” Just hearing her voice brought a peace back into his life. He leaned back in the chair and pretended Halley was standing in front of him or, better yet, sitting on his lap, making those small wiggling movements.
“Never plastic, my Baron, not you. A playboy? Well, perhaps.”
“Halley?” Nick’s voice dropped suddenly.
“Yes?” It almost startled her, this sudden shift in tone. His voice was thick and edged with emotion.
“I love you very much.”
Halley bit down on her lip. Archie was standing just outside the open office door fixing a broken shade, and she was sure the sparks that shot through her would send him in with a fire extinguisher. She was hoping that not seeing Nick for two days might calm the fires and replace the desire she felt for him with a more manageable, respectable emotion, but it hadn’t worked. Her love for him was a wild, uncontrollable love. She knew now what people meant when they talked about
lust
. Yes, she lusted after Nick Harrington! She pressed her legs together and spoke softly into the phone. “Nick, if you knew what you were doing to me, you’d hang up and get over here immediately.”
“The closet?”
“Uh-huh.”
“I wish I wish I could.” His throat was tight.
“Me too.”
Nick didn’t want to hang up. It didn’t matter what they said, as long as he knew she was there at the end of the phone line, as long as he could hear her breathing and feel the smile in her voice. “I’ll let Abbie Melrose know we’re not coming, and we’ll go this weekend instead.”
George knocked on the door and motioned that the cab was there to take him home to pack, and then to the airport. “Halley, I have to go.”
“Don’t worry about Abbie, Nick. I’ll call and tell her. May the wind be at your back, my love.”
She hung up and felt an insane desire to rush to the airport and surprise him, or maybe hide inside his suitcase. No, she thought, scolding herself, librarians didn’t do such things. Now Rosie,
she
might do that. Halley laughed as she shuffled through some scraps of paper, looking for the Melroses’ phone number. Maybe in another life she’d come back as a Rosie and have all the fun. Then her thoughts turned to Nick and she decided she’d settle for exactly what she had at this moment. For however long it lasted. She dialed the number.
Neither she nor Nick had talked about the future, or what followed after saying “I love you.” And Halley hadn’t pushed it. She didn’t want to disturb the incredible joy Nick’s love had brought her, didn’t want to rock the boat … so she pushed all threatening thoughts away, including the nagging, relentless suspicion that although Nick had given her his love, there were still important parts of his life he hadn’t begun to share with her.
A prim and proper voice on the phone announcing the Melrose residence broke into her thoughts.
Halley’s voice tumbled across the line. “Hello. May I please speak to Mrs. Melrose?”
The maid announced that the Melroses were not available, but she would be pleased to take a message.
“All right, thank you,” Halley said. “Please tell them
that Nick Harrington and Halley Finnegan will not be—” A sudden idea struck her and she paused in mid-sentence, reorganizing her thoughts. It was short notice to cancel out for dinner. Besides, she’d be moping around all night thinking about Nick, so she might as well be with people close to him. It might be just what she needed to put to rest those irrational suspicions about the man she loved. Furthermore, Abbie Melrose had been so warm in her invitation that Halley was certain it would be all right.
“Ma’am?”
“Oh, yes, excuse me. Would you please tell Mrs. Melrose that there will only be one of us coming for dinner tonight, rather than two as she expected? Thank you.”
The drive out to the Melrose estate was beautiful at dusk. Muted shadows fell across the lovely, sculptured hills, and trees and houses were backlit by the glow of the setting sun. Halley thought of Nick the whole time, wondering if it was difficult for him to drive past these same lovely pines and giant oaks, wondering if at every turn of the curling road he thought of Anne and the times when they must have made the drive together.
She wondered and she hurt for him, but she felt no twinge of jealousy that he had loved Anne so much. It was too honest a love for her to envy.
She reached the Melrose estate just as the sky gave way to stars and moonlight, and with a feeling of anticipation she turned into the long, wooded drive.
Stan Melrose opened the door himself.
“Halley! What a nice surprise. So you made it, after all. We were told only Nick was coming, but this is wonderful.”
“Oh, Stan, I’m terribly sorry. I think there was a misunderstanding.” Halley’s hand flew to her cheek.
Just then Abbie Melrose walked into the room, her frail body supported tonight by a slender cane she carried in one hand. “Halley, darling, hello.” She kissed Halley on her cheek. “And where is our Nick?”
Abbie shook her head apologetically. “I’m terribly sorry, Abbie. There was a misunderstanding. When I called to say that only one of us was coming, I meant me. Nick had to go to Chicago and asked me to cancel. But I decided impulsively to come along alone. I hope I haven’t created any problems.” Her eyes moved from one to the other.
Abbie smiled kindly. “Of course not, dear! We are thrilled to see you. It will give us all a chance to get to know each other better. Come into the living room and sit.”
Halley had just turned to follow Abbie’s petite figure across the hall when a movement on the curved staircase caught her eye.
“Why, hello,” Halley said softly, looking into the most beautiful dark eyes she had ever seen. Instinctively she walked to the stairs and got there just as the small girl reached the bottom step. Halley crouched down until her eyes were level with the child’s, and smiled warmly.
“Oh, Nell.” Stan turned around just then and spotted her. “We have a friend we want you to meet.” He was beside them in a minute, his face beaming. “Nell, this is Miss Finnegan. Halley, this is Nell.”
“Nell.” Halley reached out and took one small hand in her own. “What a beautiful name you have. I’m so pleased to meet you, Nell.”
The girl offered her a smile; it was tentative at first, and then she relaxed as Halley held her hand.
She was breathtaking, Halley thought. Like a portrait, with such lovely, creamy skin and those huge black eyes. Those eyes …
Halley watched as Nell dropped her eyes down to concentrate for a minute on the bottom step. Thick lashes swept her pink cheeks, and then they lifted, and she looked at Halley again. They were familiar, those eyes. Could Nell have visited her library at one time? Not likely, but possible. Where, then? Halley looked up and saw Abbie and Stan both watching her with an expression she couldn’t quite read. She looked back at Nell. “Do you live near here, Nell?”
“I live here.” Her voice was petal-soft, not boisterous or full of uncontrollable laughter like Halley’s nieces and nephews.
“Here?” Halley lifted her brows and looked over the little girl’s shoulder at Abbie.
Abbie’s smile had faded. “Nell is our grandchild, Halley. We thought Nick had told you.”
“Grandchild?” The word registered slowly. Grandchild. Those deep, familiar, smoky eyes … She looked at Nell. She was still holding on to Halley’s hand, her head tilted slightly to one side as she watched Halley curiously.
“Grandchild,” Halley whispered into the still air.
“Yes.” Abbie rested one hand on Halley’s shoulder. “This is Nick’s daughter, Halley.”
Later Halley couldn’t remember walking to the living room, but she knew Nell still held her hand, because when she sat down, Nell was there beside her and carefully climbed up to sit next to her on the love seat. Halley’s heart hammered wildly inside the thin wall of her chest, and she felt the sting of irrational tears building up behind her lids. She couldn’t deal with it all now, not with the fact that the man she loved had neglected to tell her there was this beautiful little girl in his life.
If
she was in his life. She lived
here
, she had said. No, Halley thought, fighting the painful emotions tearing at her stomach. Don’t try to piece it all together now,
she told herself. Nell was sitting next to her, and she must attend to that.
“How old are you, Nell?” Halley asked quietly.
The innocent look on the little girl’s face calmed Halley, and her smile was warm and sincere as she watched Nell’s eyes smile back.
“I’m four.”
Four. She must have been born just before Anne died, Halley thought, a huge knot forming in her throat. She finally managed to find her voice and squeezed Nell’s hand gently. “I have a nephew
and
a niece who are both four. They’re twins, and I think they’d love to meet you sometime.”