The Accidental Boyfriend (12 page)

“Is that what you’re doing?” His quiet words stopped her tirade and for a moment, her voice caught in her throat.

“Yes,” she said. “That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

His eyes moved over her face, studying her but she had no clue what he was looking for. She wasn’t used to feeling like an open book but with Jack sometimes she got the sense that he saw more than she knew—more than she wanted anyone to see.

A small smile eased the taut silence. “And how’s that working out for you?”

She felt her lips twitching up against her will. She was such a coward. “I’ll let you know once I talk to Benjamin.”

She could have sworn she caught him flinch when she said Benjamin’s name.
Interesting
. Before she could give it any more thought, he’d resumed walking so she had to do a little skip in her high heels to catch up.

“I believe it was agreed we would follow up tonight’s familiar fun by drinking our faces off, correct?”

Holly reached his side and linked her arm through his. “Let’s do this.”

* * * *

Holly really shouldn’t make important phone calls after she’d had several cocktails. It wasn’t rocket science. She should know better. But she called him anyway.

By the time they stumbled into the apartment a couple hours later, laughing their heads off, Holly had an overwhelming need to call Benjamin. The drinks had done their job and ebbed away any humiliation she might have felt at having to explain that she’d tried to chase after him…and failed. It was time to finally come clean about her feelings. He should just be finishing up with his training for the day. The timing was perfect. Holly headed straight for her bedroom when they got inside. “You going to bed already?” Jack slurred. He’d had far more drinks than she’d had. But then he was the one recovering from a rather dramatic family reunion. She’d just been there to help.

She threw him a smile over her shoulder as she kicked off her heels in the hallway. “Got a phone call to make,” she said.

“Ah,” she heard him say behind her. “Good luck!”

She didn’t need luck. Benjamin knew her better than anyone. Once he found out that she’d followed him halfway around the world, he would get it. He would understand why she’d done what she did. There would be no more dancing around the issue—no more playing coy. Closing the bedroom door behind her she got out her phone and plopped down on the bed. This was it. Time to fess up. She took a deep breath. He would understand and everything would be fine. Things were always fine with Benjamin. She exhaled on a sigh and slowly pecked out the numbers on her long distance phone card.

He picked up on the first ring. “Please tell me my mom is wrong,” he said in lieu of a hello.

“Your mom is wrong,” she said on autopilot. But her stomach was slowly sinking. This was not the warm, welcoming hello she’d been hoping for. This conversation was not off to the greatest start.

“Please tell me you’re not really in Paris, France,” he said, his voice laced with impatience.

The fact that he knew where she was without being told didn’t surprise her. She should have known he’d have heard by now. The Oakdale gossip machine was more efficient than the Associated Press in spreading news. She was positive Ivy had told her mom, who’d told his mom, who’d told him. She rarely had to break any news to Benjamin herself. He was always two steps ahead whenever there was a crisis. Not that being in Paris, France, counted as a
crisis
, per se. Her mind flashed on a particularly fun club they’d gone to, with an outdoor patio and a killer jazz band.

“Earth to Holiday,” Benjamin said. The use of her nickname brought her crashing back to the present and she leaned back against the headboard, giving her tired, aching feet a much needed rest.

“Don’t panic, Benjamin, I’m fine,” she said, using her best soothing tone—the one she’d used to comfort him when he’d freaked out that she’d caught malaria—as if it was somehow her fault a mosquito had bit her.

“My mom said you were in Paris…France,” he said. The warm fuzzy feeling brought on by the cocktails was fading fast. He actually sounded…annoyed.

“Ummm.”

“Holiday,” her nickname came out on a long suffering sigh and Holly threw her hands up in exasperation.

“What? It was an accident. I’m sure I’m not the first person to go to the wrong Paris.”

Was she? She’d never considered it. Maybe she
was
the first.

His silence was deafening. She could practically see him frowning on the other end, his oh-so-practical brain trying to make sense of her not-so-practical actions. She needed to get this conversation back on track. This wasn’t about where she was, it was about why she was there.

“Benj, it’s really not that big of a deal. I needed to fly to Europe soon anyway, I’m just here a little—”

“Why did you go to Paris?” his voice cut her off. She had expected
confusion, even some exasperation, perhaps. But she hadn’t expected him to be so…cold.

“I wanted to surprise you,” she said.

“Why?”

Tears appeared almost instantaneously at the sharp tone in his voice. She swiped them away with her hand and sat up in bed. “I was trying to be romantic,” she said. The words came out before she thought them through and she instantly wished she could take them back.

This wasn’t right. That wasn’t how she’d intended to tell him. Not like this. Not when he was angry with her and she was half a world away.

She waited for him to say something—anything. She’d just admitted that she had feelings for him and he was silent. This was not the sweet, loving conversation she’d imagined they’d be having. Seconds ticked by as she waited for him to speak. The fact that she couldn’t see his expression was killing her.
Say something
, she wanted to shout. But she didn’t. The lump in her throat kept her silent.

“Where are you staying?”

Holly cleared her throat. “Brunelli's apartment in the city.”

“Alone?” He sounded so distant, his voice unreadable. She tried to form the words “With Jack,” but they wouldn’t come out.

At her silence, he sighed again and she had the horrible feeling she’d disappointed him. She found herself kicking her legs against the side of the bed like a sulking teenager. This was not how the conversation was supposed to go.

“You’re with Jack, aren’t you?” he asked. “Ivy told your mom he was coming to get you.”

Coming to get you.
Why did everyone seem to think she was a helpless victim in need of saving? No, not everyone. Just Benjamin and her family. “Yeah, he’s here too,” she said.

“I saw the picture.” There was not even a hint of jealousy in his tone. He was just stating a fact.

“What picture?”

“Don't play dumb,” he said with a short laugh.

The lump in her throat made talking difficult. “Nothing happened. I told you it was just a kiss.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Her head jerked back as if she’d been slapped across the face. No words could have hurt more at that moment. Why didn’t it matter? Why didn’t he care?

“He's not good for you, Holiday.” There it was, the overprotective big brotherly tone she knew so well. At that moment she despised that tone.

“Then who is?” The words slipped out and the urgency in her own voice took her by surprise.

I am.
She willed him to say it but all she got was stony silence.

Then he sighed. “What do you want me to say, Holiday?”

Holly’s breath caught as her heart moved to her throat. “I want—” she started. “I want you to give us a shot.” There was another long, heavy silence before she added, “As a couple.”

Her heart was out there, hovering in the silence as she waited for him to speak. And the silence was almost answer enough. This couldn’t come as a complete surprise, not after all the flirting, the hints, the innuendos. She’d all but spelled out her feelings from the first day she arrived back in Oakdale.

“I'm just not sure it's what's best for you.”

Holly’s body went numb and she pressed her lips together to stifle a sob. It wasn’t the words that stung so much as the tone. She knew him well enough to know when he was being honest and right now—it was killing him to tell her the truth. He was trying to be nice— he was trying to save her. She’d thought his constant concern for her had meant he cared about her as more than just a friend. And now…maybe she’d been wrong all along.

She took a deep breath but a wave of anger and hurt washed over her making her tremble. “Stop worrying about me for once. I don’t need you to save me from myself.”

All she got was a shocked silence. Benjamin had never been one for confrontations. He preferred to give people space. Well too bad. She’d been waiting to have this conversation for too long. She’d been tiptoeing around the topic out of respect for his delicate sensibilities when it came to hashing things out. She was done waiting.

“Don’t make this about me. I know what I want. What about you? Is it what you want?”

When he didn’t answer, she gripped the phone tighter and tried to swallow back the bile that was rising in her throat. “Benjamin, do you want to be with me?”

A heavy silence fell between them before Benjamin exhaled loudly. “No, I don't think so.”

Holly felt like she’d been punched in the gut as the wind rushed out of her lungs. She heard him say her name but her throat closed up, making a response impossible, even if she knew what to say.

* * * *

Jack should have gone to bed. He’d had one drink too many and would be paying for it in the morning. If he was smart, he would pop some aspirin, drink a couple glasses of water, and shut his brain off with some much needed sleep.

Instead he found himself sprawled out across one of the deck chairs on the patio, staring up at the cloudy sky. It looked bright, thanks to the reflection of city lights. But what he saw was Holly. An image of her, laughing over one of his stupid jokes, her head thrown back revealing a long, slim neck. Her face scrunched up in a grin and her eyes…her eyes were magic. In that bright red dress she’d looked way too good for the dive bar they’d found themselves in after Robert’s disastrous party.

He tried to shove thoughts of Robert to the side. Images of Holly might be torturous but they were delicious. His brother? Not so much.

If you want people to respect you, then you’ve got to demand respect. Prove that you’ve changed
. Holly’s voice taunted him. Rubbing a hand over his face, he cursed out loud. What did everyone think he’d been doing these past few years? He’d been working his butt off to make EverTech a success, he’d paid his brother back every dime he’d lost with interest and he’d become a world famous success story. But all his brother saw was the playboy in the gossip rags, the unreliable kid who’d made a mess of his life.

And it was his fault. That’s the image he presented to the world and everyone, including his family, believed it.

And rightfully so.
He shook his head and struggled upright into a sitting position. Who was he trying to kid? Look at the mess he’d gotten himself into with Holly tonight, letting his family believe he was actually in a
relationship
, God forbid. And the ludicrous mishap he’d started with Ivy and Daniel because of one stupid stunt? He hadn’t changed. Despite the new success financially, he was still the same screw up he’d always been.

Robert saw what his friends and Holly refused to believe.
You can fool your friends but you can’t fool family.

He rested his elbows on his knees and allowed his head to drop into his hands. It was the same old story with him. He did one silly, reckless thing and suddenly he ruined the lives of everyone around him. He’d thoughtlessly kissed Miranda when they were young, not giving one thought to the fact that his brother had been pining for her for years. He’d signed on the dotted line with his best friend without a second glance. He’d dropped on one knee in a stupid gesture and turned Ivy’s world upside down. He’d crushed his parents’ dreams time and time again by flitting from one woman to the next, from one party to the next, from one country to the next. It was who he was. A screw-up.

Was it any wonder Holly was looking for a man who was the exact opposite from the sounds of it?

And there it was. Right back where he’d started. All thoughts led to Holly.

What was she doing now? Probably sleeping like any sane person would. It was the middle of the night and they’d been out partying for hours. Of course she was asleep.

Images of Holly in bed flooded his brain. Her curls strewn across his pillow, a naked thigh tossed over his. He sucked in a deep breath of fresh air.
Do not go there
.

Holly was asleep, most likely dreaming of her perfect soon-to-be boyfriend.
Benjamin.
Jack thought the name in a taunting sing-song voice. He had officially devolved into a child thanks to his ridiculous infatuation with his new roommate and pretend girlfriend.

Jack hoisted himself off of the chaise lounge with a groan. It was official; he was going to be in a world of pain come morning. Shuffling into the kitchen to grab a glass of water to wash down his aspirin, he stopped short at a sound coming from the living room.

He thought he was hearing things since the lights were off, but no, there was definitely sound coming from the dark room. Heading to the living room doorway, he poked his head inside.

There she was. The woman he’d been fantasizing about for the last hour was curled up in a ball on the couch, with an old black-and-white film flickering in the background, the volume on low. From where he stood, Jack could only see the top of her head and her feet, which were sticking out from beneath a blanket.

He tip-toed toward her, thinking he would shut off the TV and wake her so she could go sleep in a proper bed. But as he drew close, he heard it. She was sniffling. Jack froze, his senses on high alert. Then he heard a little hiccup.

His stomach sank.
Oh God. She was crying
.

She must have heard him approach because she sat up a bit to peer over at him. Jack’s heart tightened painfully. Even in the dim glow from the TV screen he could make out the tears that were trickling down her cheeks.