Tess's Tale (The Chanel Series Book 3) (4 page)

Kill me now.

‘Here we are.’ He had a small smile on his face, and as he gestured toward the restaurant door his hand grazed my arm. A shiver ran down my spine at the feel of his callused fingers. He might be at college but he worked those hands hard. What would they feel like scraping over my naked skin?

Oh yeah, and thoughts like
that
weren’t helping in the bid to not act like a blithering idiot.

He led me to a table in the far corner and held a seat out for me. I couldn’t keep my eyes off his hands as he moved around to the other side and sat. Were they both the same?

‘What is it?’ He sounded uncomfortable.

‘Your hands.’

He grimaced and put them under the table. ‘I work at a construction site to help with college costs. You probably think that’s a bit common.’

It took me a few seconds to get my mouth shut again. ‘Common? You’re kidding right? I think it’s amazing.’

‘Really?’

‘You could be riding on your father’s coat tails.’ I pulled a face. I wasn’t sure how that relationship worked. Would Jolly Jim pay for him to go to college?

He smiled. ‘He wanted to pay. But I figured if I let him, then he’d be able to use it against me in the future. You know to…,’ he paused and shifted uncomfortably, ‘make me work for him.’

‘And you don’t want that?’

He shook his head. ‘And if I did, I would want it to be
my
choice.’

I reached across the table and grabbed the coat of his jacket. I wanted to see his hands again. He let me pull his arm towards me till I was holding his hand with mine. I flipped it over so I could see the palm and traced a finger lightly over the calluses.

He sighed and closed his eyes. ‘That feels wonderful,’ he whispered. He reached out his other hand towards me so I could draw on both of them at the same time.

‘You vaant duuuuck?’

I jumped at the little Chinese woman’s voice. I’d been so busy concentrating on the feel of Harry’s hands that I hadn’t heard her approach.

‘Yes.’ Harry opened his eyes and sat back up. ‘Peking Duck for two please.’

When she’d left he said, ‘It’s really the only thing they serve here so I’m glad you like it.’

‘I’ve never tried it,’ I admitted.

He rubbed those hands together. ‘Excellent. You’re in for a treat.’

The silence that stretched between us was filled with tension. Not awkward so much as expectant. Finally Harry broke it.

‘I’ve wanted to take you out since the first time I saw you.’

I blushed and looked down at the table cloth, tracing my fingertip over the pattern.

‘You were the reason we came to Vegas Ladies in the first place.’

‘You heard about my singing?’

‘No,’ he shook his head. ‘Well that’s not entirely true. We heard about
a
singer, I didn’t realise it was you.’

‘Then why?’

‘I was working at the construction site down the road. You walked past one day.’ He stopped for a second and half-closed his eyes. ‘Your hair was pulled back in a tight bun, all strict and severe. But a wisp had escaped and was dancing around your neck, shining in the sun. You kept winding it back up, but as fast as you tucked it, it was free again.’ He smiled. ‘You looked so frustrated and so beautiful. I wanted to kiss you.’

I could feel a blush creeping up my cheeks.

‘A few weeks later I saw you again. You went into Vegas Ladies. I used the ‘new singer everyone was raving about’ as an excuse to check it out.’ He smiled. ‘I never realised the singer was you.’

‘And Hillary?’ I felt like my mouth was stuffed full of cotton wool as I said her name. If there
had
been something between them, if she
had
gotten there first – already I didn’t want to give him up but I didn’t know if I could eat her leftovers.

‘She’s just Dad’s secretary.’

‘So there’s nothing?’ I waved my hand at him.

Please say no. Please say no.

He shook his head as the little woman arrived with our first course and I sagged back against my seat.

She placed a plate of meat and scallions, some little pancakes and a dark brown sauce on the table. I watched what Harry did and then copied him, placing some of the duck, sauce and scallion on a pancake. I bit through the soft pancake, into the crispy skin of the duck and flavour exploded in my mouth.

I let out a moan. ‘It’s delicious,’ I said, once I had swallowed. It was the only words we said as we polished off the Peking Duck. Once we had finished, Harry walked me back to the club, lingering in the doorway with me.

‘Thanks for dinner.’ I wanted him to kiss me, but the fact that I had never been kissed before, plus the fear that I had duck sauce on my face was making me shy. I drew a line on the ground with the tip of my shoe.

Harry put a finger under my chin and drew my eyes up to his. I was caught by his gaze, the intensity making it hard to breathe as he drew closer.

‘Is it all right,’ his voice was husky, ‘if I kiss you?’

I felt heat in my cheeks but I nodded my head, hoping I didn’t stuff it up. I’d been taking notes over the last year, watching Brittney and the other girls. But even though I knew the theory, my first practical exam was still nerve-racking.

I shouldn’t have worried. Kissing Harry came as naturally to me as breathing. I felt the warmth of his breath a moment before his lips touched mine, then all rational thought went out of my head. I clung to him as our lips slid over each other’s. His arms pulled me in hard against him, and when we finally broke apart we were both breathing heavily.

‘I’ll see you later.’ He reached out a finger and touched me on the nose.

‘Tonight?’ Oh
please
let it be tonight.

He nodded as he backed away from me. ‘Tomorrow is too far away.’

Harry came to the club that night, and every night after that, with, or without his father. He sat in the front booth while I was singing, and when I wasn’t, he joined me and Liss at the bar. I was happy about that because his father scared the living bejesus out of me. He laughed a lot, sure, but even while he was laughing, his eyes were hard and carried their fair share of crazy.

My favourite times though were the ones when we were alone, talking, kissing and staring into each other’s eyes like moonstruck teenagers. If I had realised how wonderful falling in love was, I might have tried it before.

I had been worried about what Liss would think of Harry and me dating, but she welcomed him into our home with open arms. And he started spending more and more time sitting with her and Thor at the bar while I was on stage.

Things continued blissfully for a few months. But slowly I noticed a change in Harry. Oh, he was still as devoted as ever, but he carried a mantle of tension. When we were together it wasn’t so obvious, but when he was with the other Mafiosi, tension radiated off all of them. Jolly Jim stopped laughing and Lou the Brain had a perpetual frown.

Something bad had obviously happened and I wasn’t sure I wanted to know what.

We were sitting on the little deck off the kitchen when I summoned up the courage to ask him about it.

‘What’s wrong?’

He squeezed my hand and broke from his contemplation of the building across the road. ‘Wrong? Nothing. Everything between us is wonderful. Isn’t it?’

‘Apart from your insistence on leaving me a virgin.’ Things had gotten pretty hot and heavy between us over the last month and I wanted
way
more than he was giving me. I knew he wanted it to and couldn’t understand what he was waiting for.

He laughed, leaning over to kiss me. The feel of his mouth on mine ignited all sorts of improper feelings and thoughts. I wanted to feel his hands slipping up under my blouse, hell I wanted to feel him stripping my clothes off my body. I wanted to feel the weight of him on top of me as he possessed me totally. But he wasn’t going to give me that, and I wasn’t about to let him break me from my train of thought when it had taken so long for me to ask.

I pushed him away. ‘Tease.’ I re-arranged my clothing. Somehow they always managed to get all awry when Harry kissed me. ‘I wasn’t talking about us.’

I watched the emotions flit across his face as he met my gaze. There was a war going on inside him. Part of him desperately wanted to tell me and part of him didn’t.

The part that wanted to, won out. He sighed and looked back across the street, taking up his contemplation of the building. ‘You know who my father is?’

‘Of course. I’m a virgin, not dumb.’

He smiled at my jibe. ‘He and some of the others own some of the casinos.’

I
hadn’t
known
that
.

‘They use them to launder money.’

That was probably more than I
needed
to know.

‘Anyway, a substantial sum of money’s gone missing. There’s a lot of finger pointing going on. Lou the Brain does the book keeping so a lot of them are pointed at
him
.

A sudden hope, so awful I couldn’t believe my brain had approved it, occurred to me. What if one of them killed Lou? My Mom would be free.

‘Dad’s standing firm by Lou and that’s keeping the hounds at bay for now.’

‘That must be pretty stressful.’

‘That’s not the worst of it.’ He turned away from the building and met my eyes. ‘That money was for the Corleonesi.’

I stared at him.
The what?

‘The Corleonesi are the head of the Sicilian Mafia. They’re vicious. Over the last fifteen years they’ve killed off all their opposition. We pay them support money but it’s really protection money, to stop them coming after
us
.’

‘But, they’re in Italy, aren’t they?’

‘That’s their base. A few years ago one of the Inzerillo brothers fled Italy. He made it as far as New Jersey. They say that Giuseppe Greco tracked him down.’

‘Who’s Giuseppe Greco?’

‘He’s the head of the Corleonesi Death Squad.’

‘They have a death squad?’

Okay, now I was totally freaked out. I could feel my heart trying to climb out of my body to hide.

‘So the question is, how long before the Corleonesi send Giuseppe over to find out where their money is?’

My brain started thinking about joining my heart. ‘They’ll come?’ My voice came out in a squeak.

‘Questions have been asked.’ His eyes became intent as he grasped my hands. ‘Marry me.’

‘Pardon?’ I was too busy being terrified to realise what he’d said.

‘Marry me.’ He pulled me onto his lap.

‘Why?’

‘Because I love you.’

Be still my beating heart. ‘I love you too. But why now?’

‘So that if something happens to me you’ll be looked after.’

Looked after by the Mafiosi? Now
that
was something to look forward to.

‘Something like what happened to that Inzerillo fellow?’ I couldn’t bring myself to say the word dead because I couldn’t even
think
about something awful happening to Harry.

He nodded his head.

‘No.’ I shook my head. ‘No. Don’t even think it.’ I put my hand over his mouth. ‘Don’t say it. Please don’t say it.’

‘Tess, we have to be practical.’

‘No.’ I struggled up off his lap and started to pace the small deck. ‘Why you? Why would it be you?’

He shrugged his shoulders. ‘Because of who I am.’

‘But you don’t want to be a part of it. Do you?’

He shook his head and held out a hand to me. When I took it, he pulled me down next to him. ‘I thought you’d jump at the chance to marry me, what with finally getting to lose your virginity.’

‘
That’s
what you’ve been waiting for?’

‘Of course.’

Is that what normal couples did? Waited? I guessed living with prostitutes my whole life had skewed my moral compass.

‘I have another idea,’ I said. ‘I’ll marry you.’

‘But that
was
my idea.’

‘Shush.’ I planted a kiss on his lips. ‘Marry me, but live here. Make a fresh start.’

He stared at me with uncertainty written on his face.

‘What are you staying there for? You don’t use their money. You don’t want to be a part of the organisation. Live here, with me. And one day we’ll get our own home.’

Hope blossomed in his eyes. ‘I could, couldn’t I?’

I could almost taste his excitement.

‘Would Liss and Thor mind?’

‘No, of course not.’ I hoped not, anyway. If they did, we’d find our own house sooner.

He pulled me back onto his lap and took my lips with his. When we came up for air a few minutes later my blouse had somehow gotten itself undone. ‘Oops,’ I said, making sure he copped an eyeful of bra before I re-buttoned it. Perhaps if he knew we were getting married I’d be able to seduce him before the big day.

He grinned at me. ‘Nice try. But not until our wedding night.’

Phooey.

‘I can’t afford to get you a ring. I mean I could, but not the sort of ring you deserve.’

‘Shhh.’ I lay one finger on his lips. ‘I don’t want a ring, you silly man. I want you.’

He grinned at me and then hopped down onto one knee. ‘Tess Wilbers, will you marry me? Will you spend the rest of your life with me?’

Even though we’d just had that whole conversation, now that he was making it official, I found myself blushing. ‘Yes, Harry Milano, I will marry you. I promise to spend the rest of my life making you happy.’

If I had known how soon I would be breaking that promise I probably wouldn’t have made it.

***

It was the morning before our wedding and we were lying on my bed. I’d been trying to get him to ‘practice’ for the following evening, but he wasn’t having any of it.

Instead he said, ‘There’s something I need to tell you.’

‘Yeeesss.’ I had managed at least to get his shirt off and now I ran my fingers down his chest.

He captured my hand and kissed my fingers. ‘Naughty girl, this is serious. This could change tomorrow.’

That stopped me. Nothing, and I mean
nothing
was getting in the way of the wedding.

‘I have a son.’ He said the words quickly, as if he thought he might not get them out otherwise.

‘You what?’ I sat up and stared down at him.

‘I told you.’ He sat up next to me and re-took my hand. ‘His name’s Billy. He’s five years old. I never loved his mother.’

‘Those are the three questions you thought I’d ask?’

‘Aren’t they?’

I stared at him and said, ‘Why did
she
get to have sex with you without having to
marry
you?’

‘You don’t want to marry me?’

‘Of course I do. But we could have been having sex the whole time.’ I knew I sounded like a whiny brat, but seriously, I was full of hormones and randy as hell.

He started to laugh. I sat and watched him while he hunched over, clutching his stomach with his arms.

‘What’s so funny,’ I finally demanded.

‘I was so worried about telling you about Billy, and
that’s
what you got out of it?’

I crossed my arms and stared at him while he started laughing again. When he had finished, he pulled me into him and kissed the top of my head. ‘Sorry gorgeous.’

I swivelled my face up and pressed my lips to his. The kiss quickly deepened in intensity and I crawled back on the bed, bringing him with me until he was lying on top of me. He ran his fingers down the side of my dress before returning to my breast. I sighed and arched into him and he stopped and sat back up.

I directed a look full of disappointment at him.

‘One more night,’ he said. ‘That’s all. One more night. Let me do this the right way Tess. I don’t want to stuff up again.’

‘Like you did with Billy?’

He nodded and I sighed in a totally different way and sat back up.

‘Fine. Why don’t you tell me about how he came about?’

‘I went to school with his Mom, Cindy.’

‘You were childhood sweethearts?’ I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

‘Nothing so romantic. We knew each other, that’s all. She started hanging around some of the older guys in the Mob. One of them, Dick, used her pretty badly. Two-timed her with another girl. When she found out about it, he dumped her. She was devastated.’ He paused and ran a hand through his hair. ‘Anyway she cried on my shoulder and one thing led to another.’

I tried not to get shitty, I really did. But a wave of hate for this woman, who had so easily had what I wanted, washed over me.

‘Tess.’ Harry’s voice had a warning tone in it. He knew my moods pretty well. ‘It meant nothing.’

‘Not helping,’ I said in a sing-song voice.

‘You,’ he paused to emphasise the word, ‘mean
everything
to me. I’ve given up my family for you.’

He had me there and he knew it. I felt guilty about that.

‘Fine. It meant nothing.’ I crossed my arms across my chest. ‘But how do you know Billy is your child? Couldn’t he be Dick’s?’

‘I asked him. He said he and Cindy never had sex.’

I paused while I thought about that. ‘Do you see him much?’

‘Who Dick? Well he is one of Dad’s right-hand men.

I punched him lightly on the shoulder. ‘Billy, not Dick.’

‘Oh.’ His smile told me he had known what I was talking about the whole time. ‘Well Cindy moved to her sister’s after she had him. So I don’t get to see him much. But he’s a good kid. Real smart too.’ It was impossible to stay mad when he was looking so proud.

‘Do you have any photos?’

He pulled his wallet out, removed a photo from its depths and handed it to me. It showed a small boy with dark blonde hair and deep brown eyes. He had a baseball mitt on one hand and the ball in the other.

‘He’s a cutey,’ I said.

Harry smiled in relief as I handed him back the photo. ‘You’re the best.’

‘You better
still
be saying that after tomorrow night,’ I said.

He laughed and lay back down, drawing me to him. ‘Well I guess we could practice a little,’ he said. ‘Just to make sure.’

I gave myself up to the glory of his mouth and his hands as we had a dress rehearsal for the wedding night.

***

To say our wedding was small was an understatement. Liss and Thor were our only witnesses. I was sad that Mom wasn’t there, but Liss had been more of a mother to me over the last year than Rose ever had been.

Harry said he didn’t care that his family was absent, that I was everything he needed. I think that was mostly true, but what person wouldn’t have a moment of reflection, a second of inner remorse that their family was missing at the most important event of their life.

We had our reception at the Chinese restaurant Harry took me to for our first date. The duck was as good as the first time we had gone there, but I had a different type of appetite on my mind.

Liss and Thor had given us a night at ‘The Bellagio Casino’ for our wedding present, and even though I was about to get what I had been after for the last few months, I was suddenly nervous.

I mean, it’s one thing to know the theory of what was about to happen, it was another thing to think about it in the cold light of day when passion was absent and only nerves ruled my head.

We didn’t speak during the elevator ride. Nor in the walk down the hall. Harry opened the door with one arm and swept me up against him with the other, then he carried me into the room.

The view was amazing, the room was sumptuous, the bed was enormous. That didn’t help with the tap-dancing concert going on in my stomach. I placed my over-night bag on the table and slipped my shoes off. Then, even though I was about to get what I had been wanting for the past few months, I walked over to the window.

Doubt had set up residence in my frontal lobe. What if I wasn’t any good? What if I was a lousy lay?

The sun was setting behind the Las Vegas night skyline. The flickering lights had a surreal quality. I concentrated on that as I took some deep breaths.

Harry joined me at the window and took my hand in his.