Tequila & Tea Bags (19 page)

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Authors: Laura Barnard

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***

 

Tuesday 4
th
November

I’m still fuming by the next day that I feel I need to do something. I have all of this nervous energy from the confrontation and I have a feeling if I don’t act on it now I’m likely to burst into tears and crush my face into the sofa for the rest of the year. Elsie tried to console me, but no amount of wine would do it.  

Gerry. That’s who I can go after. That little bastard. He’s the one that spread my nakedness around the village. I smile to myself, glad to have another target for my fury.

I get the bus to the next village and go straight to the bar. It’s still early so they’re just cleaning the tables and getting it ready. Gerry looks his usual smug, arrogant little prick of a man self. I should have let Will print that photo.

I take a deep breath to steady my nerves and storm over to him, adrenaline running through my veins.

‘Rose?’ he says, seeming shocked to see me. More like scared. He should be.

‘Surprise! You’re a fuck-wit!’ I shout, punching him in the stomach.

He doubles over, winded. What a pussy. I take the opportunity to grab hold of his nipples through his thin white t-shirt and twist them. His face scrunches in agony and he lets out a low, pained growl. Almost like a wounded animal.

‘Don’t like that?’ I smile sarcastically. ‘How does it feel to have someone take advantage of your tits without your permission, huh? How. DOES. IT. FEEL?’

God, I’m mad with power. But it feels good to let all of my frustration out on someone.

‘I’m sorry! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,’ he whimpers, while his colleagues look on in amusement. Clearly this guy doesn’t have any friends. He probably pulls shit like this all the time.

‘Why the hell did you do it? What did I ever do to you?’ I ask, more upset than angry.

‘Nothing!’ he shrieks, his face scrunched up in pain. I release his nipples slightly. ‘She made me do it. I’m sorry.’

‘She? Who the hell is she?’ I blurt out confused. Blaming it on someone else. Typical coward.

‘Riley!’ he whimpers, a tear falling down his face.

Riley? My Riley? Why the fuck would she do that? She’s supposed to be my friend. She’s never done anything for me to think otherwise.

‘She gave me the picture and forced me to spread the posters around, or she’d tell everyone I had a small dick.’

His colleagues laugh at his admission.

I search his face for the truth. Oh my God. He’s telling the truth. He
does
have a tiny penis. Riley took advantage of that.

‘You didn’t even take the picture?’ I ask, my head spinning. How could she have taken it?

‘No! Jesus, I could get done for rape doing something like that.’

I look at him bewildered. ‘You mean we didn’t hook up?’ I’m so confused. Elsie and Riley said I went off with him briefly. It
sounds
like me.

‘No. You were too smashed to be up for anyone,’ he admits, grimacing.

How mortifying. But I’m glad I never got off with this tosser.

‘But Riley? Why the hell would Riley want to do that to me?’ I release the full grip of his nipples. I just don’t get it. She’s supposed to be my friend.

He places his hands over them, his face beginning to get some colour back.

‘Do you by any chance have anything to do with Will?’

He clutches his chest rubbing his nipples.

‘Will? Yeah, why?’

This can't be about Will, right? She says he’s just a friend.

‘You do know she’s
obsessed
with getting back with him, right?’

I stare back, motionless. ‘WHAT? I thought they were just friends now.’

I knew I should have gone with my first instinct. Damn Elsie, making me all forgiving and naïve.

He smiles regretfully. ‘Look a little closer. You’ll see the real Riley.’

I
cannot
believe this. What a two-faced fucking bitch. I need to bitch slap her. But then what would that achieve? No, I need to use this for a bigger purpose. I have a chance to make a change here. To bring down an evil bitch.

‘Okay, you need to do something for me,’ I demand. ‘I need you to gather the village. I have to speak to everyone.’

This village feud is going to be fixed. Too many people are suffering because of it.

He rolls his eyes. ‘Oh, that’s it, is it? Just get the whole village together?’ he asks sarcastically. ‘That’s hardly going to be easy.’

I lean in closer to him so no one can over hear me. ‘What won't be easy is the entire village and internet seeing your tiny dick!’ I shriek, punching him again in the stomach.

‘You wouldn’t!’ he pleads, bent over in pain. ‘Rose, you promised.’ He looks terrified.

‘Yeah, well now I have a condition. Friday night, your village hall, 8pm.’

***

 

Chapter 18

The bus ride home gives me time to process everything. Riley is after Will. Of course she is. I can't believe I ignored my gut and let myself be swayed by some nice words. She must have lied about what Will said about me too, right? She must have. It seemed so out of character for him, yet I chose to believe that poisonous wench over him. The one person who’s actually wanted to get to know me and I easily believed so badly of him. I’m such a douche.

My mind wanders to every time she’s spoken to me. How her words must have been hiding disdain towards me. I remember her being nice as pie to me at the stables that day. Making out that we could be friends and inviting me out.

Hang on a minute. Was that the same day the horses escaped? I can't remember. I could have sworn I closed that gate, but just assumed I’d done it wrong. What if
she
was the one who opened it? What if she set me up? Oh, this bitch is
unreal.
I swallow down the fury.

I have to find Will and apologise. I just hope he forgives me for doubting him so easily. I’m not sure I’d be so forgiving if the tables were turned.

As soon as I’m off the bus I run to his house. I say run, but I stop every now and again to double over from a stitch. I really need to do some more cardio.

I knock on the cottage door and Jay opens it almost immediately.

‘Hey,’ he smiles, taking in my sweaty appearance with disgust. ‘Whatever you’ve done to that guy, you better fix it. He’s been an absolute nightmare to live with since yesterday.’

I smile, secretly glad I’ve affected him so much.

He grabs his coat and goes to leave. ‘He’s upstairs.’

I bound up the stairs, desperate to see my man. That’s what I feel he is now. My man.

I stop outside of his room and take a deep breath, before walking in. It’s empty, but I hear the shower running, so decide to wait for him. I perch on his bed and tap my fingers impatiently.

Having this time to think is making me anxious. Maybe I’ll just go through his drawers to keep me entertained. He’s bound to have some dodgy porn to cheer me up. I open the second drawer and to my absolute surprise I find posters of me topless. The same posters that were all over the village. He had something to do with it? Could Riley and he have been in on it together?

I take them out and notice the Sellotape around them. These have been ripped down from places. He did this to save me from embarrassment. My body sags with relief. I rifle through them and there must be at least fifty. How could I think he was bad again so easily? I have some serious trust issues.

The door swings open and he walks into the room dripping wet, smelling of soap and aftershave. He’s wearing only a towel wrapped around his waist. He’s towel drying his hair with a hand towel, as droplets of water cascade down his lean muscles. He stops in the door way when he sees me. I can't tell whether he’s pleased to see me or pissed off. Damn that beautiful, impassive face.

‘What are you doing here, Rose?’ he asks harshly, walking over to his chest of drawers and taking out some boxer shorts. Completely avoiding eye contact.

Shit. He’s pissed with me. Not that I blame him. He must think I’m some sort of psychotic bitch. No, that’s your ex.  

I’m shocked to see that he has a large tattoo over his broad back. How did I not notice before? But then I suppose the last time he was topless around me I was a
little
bit drunk. I only get a quick look at it, but I see a mix of images meshed together under a starry sky. He turns back to me, still looking pissed. You could cut the heavy tension with a knife.

‘I’m sorry,’ I blurt out, my voice small with fear. ‘I mean…I came here to apologise. I shouldn’t have believed those things about you.’

He glares at me, now wearing his black boxer shorts. Jesus, his body! I’m getting a lady boner just looking at him. How could I have doubted this God of a man?
Because I don’t deserve him,
my inner voice tells me.

‘That’s right. You shouldn’t have.’ He looks away again and I see the hurt I’ve caused him. I feel bloody awful.

‘It was Riley!’ I whine pathetically.

‘What?’ he asks, scrunching his face in confusion.

I stand up. ‘She was the one who told me you were saying all that shit. And she’s the one who made these posters and she let the horses out.’ I’m out of breath from my rambling and I worry I haven’t made any sense.

He walks over to me, still keeping his distance, leaning one shoulder against his wardrobe.

‘Riley? Nah, she wouldn’t do that.’ He shakes his head.

He believes
her?
Not me?

‘What? So you’ll believe her before me? Isn’t that just what you were shouting at me for not doing?’

‘I’m not shouting.’ He sighs heavily.

He’s right. He’s not. His quietness is worse. Maybe he’s stopped caring.

‘But you’re right,’ he admits. ‘I’m sorry.’ There’s a big pause while I wait for him to continue. ‘Tell me who it was.’

‘I just told you! Riley!’ God, he’s so infuriating!

‘Not her.’ He rolls his eyes. ‘The guy that broke your heart and made you so hard to crack.’

God, he’s a bloody drama queen.

I roll my eyes and sigh loudly. ‘Sorry to disappoint you, Willy, but no one has ever broken my heart. I don’t have some sad little love affair to tell you about. And I’m not hard to crack. You’re just hard to shag.’ I smile at my own joke.

‘That’s because I want your trust first.’ He stands closer, towering over me. I sit down on the bed, his dick now close to my face.

‘I trust you,’ I smile cheekily.

I reach my arms around his waist and press my face into his stomach in a weird kind of a hug. He hugs me back, stroking my head like a dog, while his abs ripple beneath me. God, I feel so safe and protected in his arms.

I slip my hands down the back of his boxers, my thumbs tugging them down.

‘Woah!’ he says, backing away, as if I’m on fire. ‘What are you doing?’

Rejection again.

‘I thought that much was obvious,’ I grumble. Colour spreads over my cheeks. Why the hell does he always make me feel so unwanted and needy?

He sits down next to me and takes my small hand in his large ones. ‘Rose, why the hell do you always want to use sex to cover your feelings?’

Why is he so emotional all the time? I’m all for being sensitive, but this is getting stupid.

I snort. ‘You know, I’m starting to think you’re gay.’

He looks at me intensely, shaking his head.

‘So, what’s with the tattoos?’ I ask, trying to change the subject.

He looks down at the floor bashfully, rubbing my hand affectionately. Is he seriously embarrassed?

‘Just a reminder, I suppose,’ he says quietly. Sadly.

I snort. ‘How can it be a reminder if it’s on your back?’

He sighs heavily, before sitting down next to me on his bed. ‘My grandad always told me to keep the past behind me.’

I peer over his shoulder. ‘So what does it mean?’ I ask. God, it’s like pulling teeth.

‘It’s just something I had done. Kind of in honour of my mum and grandad.

‘Let me see,’ I beg, putting on my best puppy dog eyes.

He begrudgingly turns so that I can study it. Wow, it’s incredible. It’s all done in varying shades of black. There’s a night sky filled with delicate stars. In the middle of it is an angel, her back turned away from me. Her wings are spread wide. On either side of the wings I notice eyes coming from the sky. The bottom of it is completed with the most beautiful roses. It’s almost haunting.

I trace the angel’s wings, feeling his muscles react underneath. ‘The angel’s your mum?’ I guess.

He doesn’t answer, but I feel him nod.

‘And the eyes are hers?’

‘One set,’ he nods. ‘The others are my grandad’s. The sky is an exact copy of how I remember the sky looking the night I lost her.’

He must mean when she took him riding. My chest tugs with emotion for him.

‘Whenever I see a similar night sky it reminds me that they’re looking down on me.’

My heart physically aches. He’s such a beautiful human being. And he’s
mine.

He wouldn’t want my pity though.

‘And the roses…have they been added since I got here?’ I chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

He turns round to face me, his eyes incredibly vulnerable. ‘They were my mum’s favourite flower.’

My poor damaged baby. Seeing the pain in his eyes, as if it were fresh, makes me want to burst into my own tears.  

I look away and pick up one of the posters.

‘You really took all of these down?’ I ask, sure he’d want me to change the subject.

‘Of course.’ He leans in, pushes my hair to one side, tracing his finger down my neck. ‘For you, Rose, I’d poke everyone in the village’s eyeballs out, if it meant saving your dignity.’ He leans in and kisses me, reminding me why I’m falling head over heels in love with this man.

***

 

Thursday 6
th
November

I can't stop smiling the next day. Everything’s sorted now. He’s promised to speak to Riley and assured me that I don’t need to personally hunt her down, although I still want to. He finds me the next day and asks if I fancy pizza and a movie tonight at his place. Of course I said yes. The idea of snuggling up to him on a sofa is heavenly. What is happening to me?

As I knock on the door that night sudden nerves start to bounce around in my stomach. I know it’s dumb, but I still get stupidly excited and tingly right before I see him.

‘It’s open,’ I hear him call from inside.

Bloody charming. Now he can't even answer the door to me. I push the door open, realising it must be on the latch. Is nobody in this village concerned with security?

I walk into the sitting room, my skin prickling with fear when I find it in darkness. My scalp prickles. Oh my God. What if he’s been broken into and they’ve got him tied up in the dark?

When the door fully opens I see that there’s candles lit around the room, emitting a warm glow. What the fuck? Is he having a séance? Halloween was last week.

‘Surprise!’ Will says, appearing out of the shadows, holding a glass of champagne. He’s wearing a three piece black suit complete with a dickie bow. He’s ridiculously handsome. He hands me the glass, a smug smile on his face.

‘What? What the hell is going on?’ I ask with a nervous giggle.

‘I thought we’d celebrate.’ He smiles as he clinks glasses with me.

I crease my face in confusion. ‘Celebrate what?’

Did I miss his birthday?

‘Tonight,’ he grins, his eyes dancing with humour. ‘I’m giving you my flower.’

I burst out laughing, spraying wine onto the floor. I try to regain my senses.

‘Are you serious?’

‘Yep,’ he grins, popping the P. ‘Well, apart from it being my flower. You know what I prefer to call him.’

‘You’re…’ I take a deep, steadying breath, ‘giving me Big Willy?’

He locks his eyes with mine. ‘Tonight he’s yours.’

A thrill of excitement runs through me. Oh my giddy aunt. I’m going to have sex with Will. I’m allowed!

Although now that it’s been announced like that, in this room full of candles, with him dressed all romantic-like, I’m nervous. And underdressed. Am I even wearing matching underwear underneath this hoodie and leggings? Normally I’m good at those things, but without our cleaner constantly washing my clothes it’s hard to keep it together. Dear God, I’m wearing pink fluffy socks. I didn’t floss. Did I take my pill? DID I?!?

‘Don’t be nervous,’ he says, pushing my hair back from my face, making me tingle all the way down to my already throbbing Lulu. ‘It’s going to be amazing.’

He presses his mouth against mine; his warm lips making me melt around him. He pulls me into him, half having to support my weight as I’m basically floppy with want.

‘Let’s go upstairs,’ he whispers seductively.

He takes my hand and guides me slowly up the stairs. I can't believe this is finally happening. What if my legs aren’t smooth enough? When did I last shave them? This morning? Or was it yesterday? Dear God, what if I have stubble? What if he takes one look at my legs and refuses to have sex with Chewbacca?

He stops abruptly in front of his bedroom door and begins untying his dickie bow. God, he’s hot. My breathing is laboured already and he hasn’t even touched me.

‘Now, I knew you’d be nervous.’ He takes my hand and kisses my fingertips. ‘Which is why I thought I’d try to make you more comfortable.’ He opens the door and ushers me in.

I walk in to find that his normally neat and tidy bedroom is an absolute mess. His duvet is creased up at the bottom of his bed, there’s clothes strewn everywhere and there’s an open pizza box on the floor by the bed, half of it missing. I turn to face him and see his jacket is off and he’s undoing his shirt.

‘You…you messed up your room for me?’

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