Tenure Track (48 page)

Chapter 25

The evening before his Spring Break reprieve was to begin, a still-downcast Lewis slumped onto his couch, comforted only by Clint’s attempts to build a cozy pillow out of his master’s stomach. Gently rubbing his companion’s fur, Lewis stared at the stained-glass window for a moment, then closed his eyes and took a deep breath, hoping whatever cosmic spirit existed would offer some guidance.

He opened his eyes with a start as the words came back to him. He could hear a voice, clear as a bell, telling him what he had to do. He obediently picked up the phone and dialed.

Gus arrived early at the Chug-a-Lug to set up his cameras. He had no problem convincing the young bartender to let him set up three cameras on a shelf behind the bar. He may not have needed so many, but he wanted to make sure he was able to shoot from several angles. Between the three, he should be able to edit one clean take.

When the manager came in and saw Gus behind the counter, he chastised the young man with a reminder that it was against state regulations to have an uncertified person behind the bar. He quoted how many years the establishment had gone without being cited for an alcohol violation.

“
Chill, Dude! Just doin’a favor for Mandy. Ya know tomorrow’s her birthday.” At the mention of his most dependable waitress, the manager backed off, but ordered Gus to make it quick and not to even think about touching any of the alcohol.

Once the cameras were situated, Gus positioned himself on a barstool, ready to shoot the scene. His lead actor entered a few moments later, motioned over by the director. “Dude!” Gus shouted, as he slapped Lewis on the shoulder and indicated where he should sit, perfectly aligned with all three cameras.

It was after 9 p.m. when Lewis entered the Chug-a-Lug to the sounds of an alternative band beginning its first set. He could see the posse seated at a table in the back of the bar. Gus had one arm around Julie and was filming Blanca and Mandy with the other hand. The birthday girl seemed to be enjoying herself, laughing, smiling, and swaying joyfully to the beat of the music. She had promised herself to have a blast on her 21
^st
.

She looked beautiful, but more mature than he recalled. Twenty-one suited her. He stood in a dark corner of the bar where it would be hard for her to see him. Watching her laugh, he began to have second thoughts about his plan. Would it be fair to do this to her, especially now, on this special day? He asked the bartender for a shot of top shelf tequila. As the liquid warmed the back of his throat, he screwed up his courage. Feeling in his pocket for the item he had brought, he finally moved to take action. One way or another, he was going to get closure.

Mandy closed her eyes and bounced to the beat of the music. Her friends were taking turns offering well wishes into the camera. Blanca was already trying to get Mandy to order another martini, even though she was still nursing one. Despite her best efforts not to think about Lewis, at one point Mandy thought she saw him out of the corner of her eye. Convincing herself that it was just a mirage, she shook it off and went back to focusing on the music.

Blanca threw her arms around Mandy and mugged for the camera. “I just want to say ‘Happy Birthday’ to my
cher
. My BFF. Amanda Panda Rosey Toesy!”

Just then, Gus received a text and excused himself, telling the girls that he needed to return a business call. The women could not see the sly smile on his face as he sauntered away.

As soon as he was gone, the other two pounced upon Julie. “He’s all lovey dovey tonight,” Blanca noted. “What’s up with you two?”

Julie said that her relationship with Gus was too complicated to explain, but that they were still good friends.

“
With benefits,” Mandy added.

Blanca slapped her hand on the table. “That’s what we need, ‘Manda. Just a couple of fuck buddies. Just call ‘em up, jump on it, then get off, and get on with your business.” She began simulating a thrusting motion with her body, egged on by the laughter of her friends. “Gus know any horny actors he could hook us up with?”

“
I don’t know, Blanc’, let’s ask him when he comes back,” Julie offered.

Blanca grew impatient after waiting a few moments longer. “Where is that dude?” She jumped up from the table, insistent on finding their friend. Mandy and Julie decided to stay put and keep listening to the band. Assuming that Gus had stepped outside to talk and catch a smoke, Blanca looked out the front door and was shocked to see him standing with none other than Lewis Burns. “What the—?” she muttered under her breath.

Blanca interrupted the men’s conversation, but not before Gus discreetly stuck something in his pocket. She didn’t even notice, as her eyes were focused solely on Lewis. Gus stepped back and adjusted his position to get a better shot with his camera. “What do you think you’re doing here? I told you to leave my girl alone!”

Lewis feigned ignorance. “I’m so sorry, Blanca. I had no idea you guys would be here. I spotted Gus and he explained.”

“
You better not try to talk to her, you understand? She don’t wanna talk to you.” Blanca was now in his face, pointing a finger at him.

Seeing as how his life had already self-destructed, Lewis looked her square in the eyes and blurted out something he had always wanted to ask. “Blanca, why do you insist on goin’ ghetto on me? Do you just like playing a stereotype?”

“
What!? Ghetto!?” she reared back in anger.

“
You know you’re better than that,” he advised. “Dr. Stevens would agree.”

“
Don’t you dare tell me what Dr. Stevens thinksa me,
coullion!
”

“
Chill out, Blanc’,” Gus advised, camera still rolling. “He’s leavin’.”

Lewis was beyond worrying about what anyone thought of his actions, but since he was speaking his mind, he might as well note the good as well as the bad. “Mandy’s lucky to have you, Blanca, all of you, watching her back.”

For once, Blanca was speechless. Lewis and Gus exchanged secret hand gestures as the professor walked away. Blanca looked into Gus’s constantly running camera. “Okay, what was
that
?”

Gus managed to convince her that Lewis’s explanation was sincere and they both agreed not to spoil Mandy’s evening by mentioning his presence. The quartet spent the rest of the evening laughing, dancing, and drinking. Occasionally Gus would reach into his pocket and feel the contraband that Lewis had handed to him, but he had his orders. He would wait until the appointed time to deliver the item.

The group retreated back home and zoned out in front of the television set as Mandy’s favorite chick flick played. All three of the girls fell asleep, allowing Gus to complete Part One of his mission before slipping out to complete Part Two. At some point during the night each girl found her way back to her own bed. Mandy didn’t even turn on the light as she flopped down, thus she didn’t notice anything amiss with the duffle bag she had packed for her Spring Break beach trip.

The girls set off in Mandy’s hybrid around noon the next day, taking their time and stopping whenever the mood struck, then waiting patiently with thousands of other college students headed to the sand for a week of Spring Break debauchery. They arrived at their condo after dinner, leaving just enough time to change into their bathing suits and hit the beach before the sun set completely.

That’s when she found it, twisted up into her bathing suit. Gus knew instinctively which clothing item she would want first. It was a simple box, sealed with a ribbon attached to a folded up note. She thought perhaps it was a belated birthday gift from the girlfriends. As soon as she saw Lewis’s distinctive handwriting on the note, she knew better.

“’
Manda, get a move on. I wanna see the sunset!” Blanca called out. Mandy stuck the gift back in her bag for later inspection.

The girls had a good time at the beach, but Mandy kept thinking about the gift.
What could it be? And why?
At first she had been a bit creeped out by its just turning up in her bag like that, until she figured out that Gus must have put it there. Blanca and Julie would have told if they had been asked to make such a delivery, but Gus liked Lewis well enough to help him.

Later that evening, after everyone had turned in for the night, Mandy locked herself in the bathroom to examine the package. First, she detached the note and slowly unfolded it to reveal Lewis’s familiar longhand:

p.s. Check out Gus’s Web site

She reread the letter three times to make sure she understood its contents. Then she picked up the tiny box. Her heart felt like it was trying to pound its way out of her chest as she carefully removed the ribbon and took off the lid. There sat Lewis’s Harvard signet ring.
Is he seriously asking me to go steady?
she wondered.
What a dweeb!

Unsure what to make of this gesture, she decided to follow the “p.s.” and see what was on Gus’s Web site. She booted up her laptop and put on headphones to prevent anyone from hearing her. Gus had posted a new video just that afternoon. He must have been working constantly since the party, as it included material from the previous night through that morning. The webisode focused mainly on Lewis. It included everything that had happened since the mediation: Lewis showing up at Gus’s play, the conversation between the two men at the Chug-a-Lug, even the parking lot confrontation with Blanca. It ended with a scene dated that morning of Lewis, narrating into the camera and appealing as much to the viewing public as to Mandy to forgive him.

His grand finale was a doozy: “I don’t normally do this, but since this seems to be the preferred method of communication for those under 30, I’ll do it your way. This is Puptent, groveling. I think one viewer suggested I be forced to sing that Barry Manilow song a thousand times for penance. My Mandy actually hates that song, but the words are really appropriate, so here goes . . .” After clearing his throat, Lewis Burns, Ph.D., launched into the most pitiful karaoke version of “Mandy” that she had ever heard, a rendition simultaneously touching and ridiculous.

There was one final scene following Lewis’s fade out. This time, it was Gus, stepping out of his job as director, and into the role of her friend. “Hey, Man’. I hope you liked the video and your present. I don’t know what’s in it. Lew wouldn’t tell me, but he promised it was somethin’ good. So I hope it didn’t blow up or nothin’. No? Good, that means your still there. Anyway, I know your head’s probably pretty messed up right now, but I wanted to add somethin’. This is big brother Gus talkin’ now. Look, I’ve always been straight wit’ you about dudes, right? I tell you who's just in it for the cootchie and who's for real. Well, I think Lew’s for real. He really loves ya, and I know you love him. Don’t lie about that, girl. Look, we guys, we’re stupid a lotta the time. That’s why you girls’re smarter’n us. You gotta forgive us sometimes, ya know? Don’t throw over a really good dude who just made a mistake, knowwhatImsayin’? Love’s scary, believe me, I know. But the next dude that comes along, maybe you don’t love so much, but he’s just in it for the cootchie, and ya still get hurt. Or you give up and wind up alone and dried up like Mother Teresa, ya know? Since you ain’t Catholic, that won’t work so good. Anyway, it’s up to you, but I think you should give the dude another chance. That’s my ‘vice. Peace out.”