Tame: Carter Kids #3 (30 page)

I didn’t cry.

Not a single tear spilled from my eyes when the coroner zipped up the body bag with Tommy Moyet inside of it.

Even now, as I sat in the waiting room of the hospital, having been stitched up, I couldn’t feel a thing.

Nothing.

His face; blue, bloodied, and marred with a bullet hole in the center, haunted me, just like my father's had when I watched first hand George Dennis take his life away, and still I didn’t weep.

Emotionless, I kept my eyes locked on the door of the room the doctors had rolled Teagan into over five hours ago.

This was on me.

All of it.

Tommy was dead.

Teagan was… I didn’t even know what was happening with Thorn.

They'd taken her away from me the moment the ambulance doors had opened and I hadn’t been allowed to see her since.

And the baby?

I didn’t know a damn thing.

The cops had come and gone, several of them. All asking the same fucking questions with their tiny notebooks and beady eyes.

I'd answered all their questions.

I had nothing left to hide and only one thing left to lose – she was currently behind door 203...

"Did you recognize the man that shot you, Mr. Messina?"

"Yes."

"Do you know his name?"

"Gerome Javi."

"Several witnesses said they heard him mention you personally. Did he have some sort of vendetta against you?"

"Yes."

"Why would that be?"

"I beat him to within an inch of his life eight years ago and served a five and half year sentence for the privilege."

"And Tommy Moyet? Do you know of any bad blood between Mr. Javi and the deceased?"

"No. The only mistake Tommy Moyet made was befriending a guy like me."

Tommy was dead and the last words I'd spoken to him were on bad terms.

Tommy protected me when I should have been the one protecting
him
.

He could have told Javi I was there, but he
didn’t.

I could have come out from under that table and stopped it, but I
didn’t
.

I did absolutely nothing as my oldest friend in the world had his brains blown out by a man after
my
blood.

All because I loved my wife too much.

Because I chose to put her life and feelings above everything and
everyone
else.

The worst part was knowing that if I had to do it again, I would choose her
every damn time
.

What kind of a heartless monster did that make me?

Knowing that I would rather watch the whole world burn before losing my wife?

Knowing that even though I was heartbroken my friend was dead, I wouldn’t change a thing because Thorn got to live.

From the age of seventeen, I'd been obsessed with her.

The girl next door.

The thorn in my side.

She was my best friend – then and now.

She was strong.

She was opinionated.

She annoyed the shit out of me back then and she challenged me on everything.

She was my biggest weakness and having her love me was my proudest accomplishment.

She was the
only reason I'd had to keep my nose clean in prison.

She
had
to live.

"How's the arm?" Lucky, who was sitting beside me, asked, stirring me from my reverie.

"Still there." I reached up to touch the part of my arm just below my shoulder where the bullet had gone through. "Doc said the bullet went straight through." It stung like a motherfucker, but I wasn’t going to lie down on a gurney for the night and feel sorry for myself, not when my wife was inside that room. "It didn’t hit anything…important. Just muscle." The countless x-rays I'd had confirmed that. "He gave me antibiotics and called it a flesh wound."

"You were damn lucky you didn’t lose your arm, Noah," Lucky continued to say, eyes locked on the sling holding my right arm up. "That bullet could've ended your career."

Lucky was telling me the same damn thing I'd heard from the doctors earlier.

"You will need to undergo an intense rehabilitation and therapy program to get that arm functioning again, Mr. Messina," the doctor told me as I sat on the hospital bed, trying to take it all in. "Absolutely no fighting for the next three months..."

"I'm a fighter, Doc," I shot back. "It's what I do. You said the bullet went straight through, so just give me some antibiotics and let me get back to my wife."

"The muscles in your arm have been
severed
," the doctor countered. "This isn’t some playground wound you can treat with an icepack and painkillers."

"What are you saying?"

The doctor sighed heavily. "I'm saying that even with rehabilitation and intervention, there's a possibility that you may never regain full mobility in your right arm…"

"Do you think I give a damn about my
career
anymore?" I choked out. "When Tommy's dead and Teagan's…" My voice broke off. I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t even bear to
think
it. Shaking my head, I continued my silent vigil of watching her door.

"Teagan will be
okay
," Lucky countered quickly. "It's shock." He nodded his head, but his hands were shaking. "Just shock," he repeated quietly.

"The blood," I choked out. The thought of Teagan hemorrhaging on the floor caused a spike of adrenalin to rush through my veins. Clearing my throat, I continued to stare at the door. "She's pregnant, Lucky."

"Shit," he let out a heavy sigh. "How far along?'

"I don’t know." My voice was flat. Empty. "We just found out."

"It'll be okay." Lucky muttered under his breath. "Have a little faith."

"Faith is for the optimists." I cleared my throat again, hating the sound of my own flat voice. "I'm a realist."

"Mr. Messina?" a small, female doctor, clad in purple scrubs came to stand in front of me. "My name is Dr. Hardy. I've been taking care of your wife."

Immediately, I was on my feet. "Is she okay?"

"Yes, she's stable," Dr. Hardy replied. "Her blood pressure dropped significantly and it took a while to regulate due to the fact that she was severely dehydrated, but we've managed to stabilize her temperature and blood pressure, and we've administered an IV line with fluids."

"And the baby?" I managed to squeeze out. I was afraid to ask about the baby. She'd had no prenatal care. She'd consumed alcohol. She'd roughhoused around a goddamn gym and had jetted around the country for the past five or so months. I was afraid of what that doctor was going to tell me. "We...I -I don’t know if she's still …"

"Your daughter is just fine, Mr. Messina," the doctor replied with a smile. "Strong heartbeat and perfectly proportioned for twenty weeks' gestation."

"My…" My head began to spin.
A daughter…
"Twenty weeks?" Every emotion I'd been holding back impaled me in that moment.
Daughter…

I felt my legs buckle beneath my weight and if Lucky hadn't been standing beside me to lean on, I would have collapsed.

"Hear that, man?" Lucky chuckled, wrapping his arm around my waist. "Your
daughter
."

"My daughter," I repeated slowly. "My…daughter."

I had a daughter.

Teagan was carrying my daughter inside of her.

I knew in that moment that whatever the future held for me, I was going to protect her.

I'd heard Javi's threats. He'd said they had something special planned for my wife.

There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that they would have to kill me dead before I allowed anyone to lay a hand on my wife or my baby.

Book twelve and you guys are still hanging in there with me. I could say thank you a million times over and it wouldn’t be enough. For making my dreams come true, thank you. Every time you buy, read and review one of my books you are helping me live my dream. Thank you. My dad, for helping me out with the school runs when I'm elbow deep in a book deadline. I never even have to ask. You're always there for me.

Alycia: I love you so much. You're one of the kindest, most loyal, and lovely people I've had the privilege of meeting and I'm so honored to call you one of my best friends. I love your bones girl!!

Tracey-Lee: my PA and another best friend for life. T, thank you so much for putting up with me even though I'm a complete ditz and totally disorganized. I love you loads, gorgeous girl! Mwah!!! <3

Aleesha, my amazing, superb, kickass editor, who puts up with my crazy deadlines and daft lingo! I can't express how much I appreciate and value your friendship and professionalism.

Leigh, for being an amazing person and working with me on such crazy notice.

Samantha, for proofing my book on basically zero notice. You're a star!

The girls of Chloe's Clovers. You all are my rock! I go to you with my troubles and my jokes and you accept me, warts and all. This book is for you guys! <3

I also want to mention my stepmother, Sinead, for her pots of homemade soup, and the last fifteen years of support and encouragement.

My husband John and my kids. My love for writing is why I do this. My love for you three is why I do this on the bad days. My world. My heart. My all.

Bianca and Nicole and all my Aussie and New Zealand readers. I love you guys! I'll come over someday I promise.

Everyone who came to see me at Essex. God, you guys blew me away. I didn’t realize until I met you all.

Finding a place where I actually fit in. I fit in with all of you guys. Thanks for having me, accepting me, and reading my words.

Julie, my main woman. My personal assistant at signings, and my agony aunt in real life. Love your bones, Poolie. Make sure you give me a nice bridesmaid dress next April! Wink, wink!

My best friend Tracy for being so patient with me and loving me even though I'm a flake and sometime absent friend.

The other authors I've met on this journey.

Yvonne, for your support and love for my little man.

The girls in the local post office who put up with my numerous parcels.

There's so many people I need to thank and acknowledge, and I've gone completely blank. But I sincerely appreciate everything you all do for me. Be it sharing my posts or spreading the word about me.

You guys will be forever in my heart. You give me the boost and confidence to continue when things get hard.

I love you all. Thank you.

Chloe Walsh is a twenty-six-year-old wife and mother of two from County Cork in the south of Ireland. The youngest of five children, reading and writing was her escape as a child.

In January 2014, she started to write about a cocky, self-assured man named Kyle Carter, and five weeks later, on Valentine’s Day 2014, she self-published her debut novel,
Break my Fall
, for a handful of friends who had called over for tea, read bits and pieces of Kyle, and wanted to read the story on their E-readers rather than printed sheets.

Shockingly – and no one was more surprised than her – the book was a huge success, reaching No.1 in the UK Bestsellers Lists. Chloe followed it up in April 2014 with the sequel,
Fall to Pieces
, vowing that this second book would be the final chapter for Kyle.

The demand for a third installment was overwhelming and a series was born! The final book became two:
Fall on Me,
the third book in the accidental Broken series, was released in August 2014, and
Forever we Fall
was released in October 2014.

Treacherous
, the first book from her Carter Kids series was released in March 2015, followed by
Always
(Carter Kids #1.5) in June 2015.

DiMarco’s Secret Love Child
(Parts 1 & 2) were released in later March 2015.

Blurring Lines
was released in May 2015, followed by
Never Let Me Go
, in December 2015.

Thorn
, is her eleventh book, and was released in February 2016, on the two-year anniversary of her publishing career.
Tame
followed in September of 2016.

An avid reader, Chloe enjoys lurking in a corner with her E-reader, and playing sports.

She has a deep love for paranormal romance and young adult fantasy and hopes to take the plunge into the genres in the not too distant future.