Tame: Carter Kids #3 (16 page)

When I finally managed to compose myself, I let myself out of the toilet cubicle and walked back through the bar to our booth.

Ignoring Beau and Tommy, who were still sitting around the table, I lowered myself onto my seat and stared straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact with the men who were determined to make my life a living hell.

I spotted Noah over by the bar and decided to focus my whole attention on him.

Stonewashed denim jeans hung low on his hips.

A crisp white shirt melded to his chest like a second skin, emphasizing his bulging muscles and deep, sun kissed tan.

His black hair was wet, ruffled and, as per usual, standing on the top of his head in that sexy, natural way.

A beer bottle hung loosely from his right hand as he leaned against the bar, deep in conversation with Lucky.

Rolling his shoulders, Noah twisted his head from side to side as he spoke to the man beside him, obviously loosening up from his fight earlier on tonight.

My mouth ran dry as I coveted him from my perch.

It didn't pass my attention that every female in the bar was gawking at my husband.

Knowing that all those women wanted him and he was going to bed with me tonight was one hell of an ego boost.

Every once and a while he took a sip from the bottle and when he did, my eyes immediately went to his throat.

Watching his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed caused the muscles deep in my groin to tighten and flex.

Lucky said something then – something funny –and Noah threw his head back and laughed.

It was a rare sight and I felt oddly jealous that I wasn't the one making him laugh.

Guilt churned inside me as I studied his handsome profile.

How could I even contemplate leaving him again?

As if he felt my gaze on him, Noah turned around.

His eyes roamed across the bar as if he was seeking me out, and when he found me, his gaze was so intense, his brown eyes penetrating me, owning me with a single glance.

He was choosing me with his eyes, claiming me with his smile, and owning me by just breathing.

It was in that moment I realized something; it didn't matter how much we hurt each other or how badly we fought, I was his beta and he was mine.

Our love was permanent and unfaltering.

It was so strange how Noah had forced his way into my world at seventeen and, just like that, my internal arrow had switched.

Without my permission, my heart had directed itself towards Noah Messina.

My soul had unanimously claimed his soul as its mate, and wherever he would go from that point on I was sure to follow, regardless of common sense, heedless of the consequences.

Turning his back on his friend, Noah prowled towards me and my toes curled in nervous anticipation. The way he bit down on his bottom lip caused my skin to tingle all over.

"Thorn," he acknowledged in a deep, gruff tone when he reached me.

His dark eyes flickered with heat, just like his infamous temper, except it wasn't anger I saw in his eyes tonight.

It was concern.

Snapping out of my lust induced trance, I forced a smile. "Noah," I replied, a little breathless.

His eyes were locked on my face and I couldn't look away.

Sitting down beside me, so close that I had to twist around to face him, Noah leaned into my ear and whispered, "You good, Thorn?"

His voice held a tint of uncertainty, though he hid it well.

"I'm good, Noah," I replied, not taking my eyes off him. "You?"

He took a swig from his bottle before settling it down in front of him. "Tired," he admitted gruffly. Leaning back in the seat, Noah turned his body to face me, giving me his full attention. "I could sleep for a year and it wouldn't be enough." He studied my face with dark, perceptive eyes. "What's wrong?"

Everything.
"Nothing," I lied, forcing a smile. Twiddling my thumbs, I struggled to find something to say that wasn't going to ruin this rare moment of peace between us. "I'm in."

His dark brown eyes softened. "I know, Thorn. Me, too."

Hearing Noah say he was 'in' was more important than hearing the words ‘I love you’. Being 'in' meant everything – he'd told me as much all those years ago. You could love someone, but being in love with them was so much deeper – so much more.

Stateless'
Bloodstream
was blasting from a nearby speaker and I swear I felt the words of the song right down in my bones. It was as if the lyrics had been written to describe how I felt for this man. The love I felt for Noah… it was so overwhelmingly consuming.

Shifting closer to me, Noah drew me against him, encircling me in a haven of safety. "I'm so fucking nuts for you," he whispered in my ear and I had to bite back a moan.

His alcohol scented breath was fanning my cheek and when I felt his thumb brush over my bare thigh, my eyelids fluttered shut of their own accord. "My little Thorn."

Biting down hard on my lip, I sagged against him, wanting nothing more than to disappear inside my husband and never resurface. It was soft, tender, intimate moments like this that made all the guys’ cruel comments and nastiness so worth it.

"I'm drunk," he added in a slightly slurred voice. "But I mean it, Thorn. I love you… I love you so fucking much."

"I believe you," I replied quickly in a pained tone as I clenched my eyes shut and inhaled the smell of his cologne and soap. I struggled to stay in my seat; the urge to climb onto Noah's lap and bury myself in his arms was almost too strong to resist. "I love you, too."

"When this tour's over and done with, I'm going to take you home," he continued to say. "Back to Ireland. Hell, I'll even face your uncle with you if that's what you want." Dipping his face to the curve of my neck, he nuzzled my skin with his nose. "Whatever it takes to make you happy and keep you happy." He pressed a kiss to my collarbone. "I'll do it."

The things he could make me do, the way he could alter my way of thinking.

He had so much power over me. I was weakened in his presence and built up in his absence.

Desperation mixed with raw emotion swirled through my veins, bounding me eternally to him.

He was my forever.

"I just want you, Noah," I choked out, drowning in my feelings for him. "You're my
home
and you're my
family
. All I want is a happy life with
you
."

We were running from danger and I was playing with fire by simply being with this man.

He was treacherous to my body, dangerous to my soul, and irresistible to my heart.

I couldn’t contain my feelings. I was bursting to the seams with love for this man.

Passion was overriding my common sense – my sense of shame.

Everything evaporated around me and all I was left with was Noah.

"Noah Messina." I caressed his face with my hand, tracing over every line and curve that I'd already memorized by heart.

Noah closed his eyes as I touched him. "You have no idea what that does to me," he confessed, leaning into my touch, nuzzling the palm of my hand with his grizzly jaw. "Your touch." He exhaled a sharp breath. "Feeling you feeling me…"

My heart was going wild in my chest, hammering and fluttering against my ribcage. Every nerve in my body was alive with electricity as I trailed my fingers over the faint scar line above his left eyebrow, then the slight bump on the bridge of his nose that had been broken more than once before moving lower to stroke my thumb across his whiskered chin.

He was so beautiful.

Inside and out.

"Teagan Messina," Noah whispered tenderly, opening his eyes to look at me. A small smile broke out across his face. "I never had a fighting chance against you, had I?"

"I told you I could take you," I teased before leaning in and claiming his lips with mine.

Noah growled against my mouth.

His arms came around my waist.

Seconds later, he was pulling me onto his lap and taking control of the kiss.
Taking control of my heart…

Digging his hands into my hair, Noah pulled my face towards his.

Dropping his face to touch mine, he stared so intently into my eyes that I almost couldn't handle the raw emotion of it all.

"You saved my life," he rasped, nails digging deeper into my scalp. I welcomed his touch. I savored the raw, rough feel of his touch. "From a life of crime." He kissed me hard before pulling back to look into my eyes. "From a future of being alone."

Sighing heavily, I trailed my fingers through his hair as both adoration and desperation coursed through me. "Noah, you never needed saving. You just needed to wake up."

"I'm awake now," he whispered, thrusting himself upwards.

"Yeah?" I breathed, feeling his erection press against me.

His hands tightened on my waist. "Yeah."

I couldn’t keep my hands off Teagan all the way back to our hotel room.

Staggering out of the elevator with my wife wrapped around me, I kissed her frantically, hardly able to hold back. I wanted her so badly.

Her lips were on mine, our tongues dueling viciously; scorching me, burning me to within an inch of my life.

The alcohol in my veins, mixed with the adoration in my heart for this woman, was driving me out of my goddamn mind.

The moment we were inside our room with the door closed behind us, I was on her.

"I love you," she cried out when her back slammed against the door, with my body covering hers.

"I love you, too," I growled against her lips as I ripped at her little red dress, desperate to be buried inside. "So damn much."

Dropping my hands to her thighs, I dragged the tiny slip of a dress she had on over her head, exposing her bare breasts. "You’re beautiful," I whispered as I palmed her small, perky breasts in my hands and ground my hips against her.

It didn’t matter what color dress she wore, or whether she had fancy lingerie on or not.

My wife was a walking, breathing temptation to me.

One I could never resist.

"I want you inside me so bad," she begged, tightening her legs around my hips, thrusting her pelvis against me. "Now."

Slipping my hand inside the plain white cotton panties she had on, my breath hitched in my throat when I felt her slick heat.

"Christ, Thorn," I grunted, as my fingers slid inside her without effort. "You're soaking, baby."

"Yes…harder…" Moaning loudly, Teagan threw her head back as she rolled her hips against my touch and instantly, I knew what she needed. "Noah…"

Pulling my fingers out of her, I dropped my hands to cup her ass and walked her over to the bed before tossing her down on her back.

Ripping her panties from her body, I spread her eagle on the bed before dropping to my knees between her legs. Dipping my face to the apex of her thighs, I swiped my tongue down the length of her slit, reveling in the taste of her.

"Noah," she cried out. Entwining her fingers in my hair, Teagan pulled and yanked on my hair as I thumbed her clit with my hand and worshipped her pussy with my mouth.

"I could eat you all night," I growled, loving the sounds and mewling noises that came from her mouth. Christ, she was fucking heaven on my tongue. This woman… she had me.

All of me.

"Noah," she cried out again – louder this time.

Her fingers tightened in my hair. Her pussy clenched around me.

"I know," I purred, doubling my efforts to get her off.

I fucked her with my mouth, hard and rough, enjoying the control she was giving me, the pleasurable sounds from her throat.

She was close.

Fuck, she was almost there…

"I'm going to…"

I flicked her clit hard and came she came apart around me, jerking violently beneath me.

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you," I sang down the phone. "Happy birthday best buddy. Happy birthday to you…"

"Thanks," Hope replied sadly. "It's not the same without you here, though."

"I know." Hope and I had celebrated our last eight birthdays together. Being on opposite sides of the Atlantic Ocean for her twenty-sixth one felt all wrong. "Did you get my present?"

"The backup hard drive. Yeah. It was real thoughtful, babe."

"Don’t say I'm not looking out for you," I teased, feeling elated at the sound of my best friend's voice.

"So how's married life on the road?"

I glanced across the table at Lewis, who was sitting opposite me, and then down at my plate. "It's…"
Lonely. Isolating. Nothing like what I thought it would be.
"Different."

I looked around at my surroundings, and then down at myself. I was sitting in the restaurant of the latest swanky hotel we were staying. Noah was working out at the gym down the street and as usual, I was alone. It wasn’t exactly the vision I'd anticipated when I'd left Ireland with Noah two months ago. "It's…yeah. It's definitely different."

"Good different...?" Hope asked, letting her voice trail off.

I could hear the concern in her voice.

"It's good when I'm with Noah," I filled in brightly.
But those moments were far and few between…

"And how often is that?" Hope countered observantly.

"He's a busy man," I replied defensively.

Because of his crazy work schedule, I hardly spent any time with Noah. In the ten weeks that we'd been on the road, I'd discovered that the life of a MFA fighter's wife was a lonely one.

When we were together at night, everything felt right for a little while. It was the only time we were completely alone… but then we woke up, and it was back to training and travelling...

"He has like a bazillion interviews every day and endorsement commitments to uphold." Not to mention his inhumanly intense training regime. "Did you know he's the face of Huzzah for Men?" I didn't, or at least I hadn't until last month. "They're like the biggest sports clothing company this side of the hemisphere."

"I did know, actually," Hope replied. "But I'm more concerned about you."

"I love him, Hope," I told her, biting my knuckle. Loving Noah made me weak. It made me pathetic and I loathed the woman I was turning into. "And it's only been a couple of months. Things will calm down after the tour."

I was clinging to that little spark of hope.

Praying like hell that one day soon we would be able to settle into a home – a permanent one.

"Are they still being jerks to you?" she asked, and I felt my cheeks turn pink.

I couldn’t talk about it, not with Lewis sitting across from me, but I wanted to.

I wanted to piss and moan and howl to my best friend about the bullies that were making my life hell.

"Same as always," I replied, hoping that would be enough for Hope.

"And what about JD?" she asked. "Any more delightful bullets on pillows?"

"Hardly." I mentally sagged in relief. "We haven't gotten as much as a whiff from JD the Troll."
And long may it last
. "It's been blissfully quiet on the JD frontier."

"Thank god," Hope said with a sigh of relief. "I'm worried about you, Teegs."

"I'm safe," I assured her, feeling a stinging sensation in my eyes. "But I'm missing my best friend like crazy."

This was only the second phone call we'd had since I left Ireland in March.

We text and emailed each other but it wasn't the same.

I missed her.

Hell, I missed Uncle Max, even though he was a stubborn jackass.

I missed Sean.

The people I'd spent the last seven years of my life with were gone.

I was surrounded by strangers who hated me, and a man most women would cut my eyes out to have.

"Ditto," she chuckled, though it sounded more like a broken sob. "We don’t talk enough anymore."

"So," I said, daring to breach the topic. "How's Jordan? Is he being nice to you?" I knew he was still in Ireland. She'd said as much in her last
super-vague
email.

"He's not like I remember," she finally replied after a long pause. "He's changed, Teagan. He's not my Jordan. Not anymore."

"Change is good," I offered. Lifting up one half of my sandwich, I bit down. "You know the saying," I mumbled between mouthfuls. "A change is better than a rest."

"No, Teegs," Hope argued sadly. "He's a grown up now. Like a real man. He's not my Jordy. He's Annabelle's fiancé."

"He's
your
husband," I corrected, speaking for the first time about the biggest secret I'd ever kept for my best friend.

Hell, the biggest secret I'd ever kept, period.

The secret that had floored me all those years ago....

I was loitering around in the back stairwell of the Henderson Hotel where I was waiting on my boyfriend – who wasn’t supposed to be my boyfriend – to come out of the gym.

Hope, who had given me a ride because Uncle Max had my driving privileges revoked, was keeping me company.

I hadn't seen Noah since the whole allergic reaction to the condom incident the day before yesterday, and I was worried. Actually, I was more than just worried. I was pretty damn mortified. It wasn’t every day a girl broke out in a blistering rash after having sex with her boyfriend. It also wasn’t everyday said girl's legal guardian walked in on the scene…

"If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell a soul?" Hope asked, drawing me out of my reverie.

"The jury's still out about whether or not Noah has a soul, so can I tell him?" I joked. Noticing Hope's expression, I turned and gave my best friend my full attention. "Hope, you can tell me anything."

Hope turned to face me and grinned. Her crystal clear skin looked flawless, her blue eyes danced with mischief, and I was immediately green with envy. Hope was gorgeous – blatant, eye-catching gorgeous – and it was hard to be around her without feeling slightly inferior – or in my case, majorly. "I'm getting married!"

My jaw fell open. "You're getting what now?"

"Married!" She grinned, revealing a set of pearly white teeth. "Tomorrow. It's all arranged, and I want you to be my witness."

"You cannot be serious?" I deadpanned.

Hope scrunched her nose up and frowned. "I don’t need advice or a lecture, Teegs."

"I'm not. I'm not…" Jesus, this was too much to take in at ten o clock in the morning. "So, let me get this straight," I muttered, more to myself than Hope. "You're getting married tomorrow?"

Hope nodded earnestly

"To Jordan?"

"Yes," Hope chuckled, "to Jordan. Who else?"

"Oh my god." I wanted to scream,
are you crazy
, but I didn’t. I couldn't. I was freaking speechless…

"I know this sounds sudden and rushed," Hope continued to say, interrupting my panicked thoughts. "But it's really not. I've been planning this day my entire life…shit – the guys." Grabbing onto my shoulders, Hope turned me towards the glass doorway before hissing in my ear, "Not a word of this in front of my brothers."

The moment my Noah walked through the double doors with Colt and Cam at his side, the air expelled from my lungs in a heady gasp.

His eyes locked on my face and I could see his surprise at seeing me here.

"Alright boys," Hope announced as she stepped towards her brothers and wrapped her arms around their shoulders. "Let's leave the lovebirds to it."

Surprisingly, Colt and Cam didn’t toss out any smart comments or illicit innuendo – well, Cam winked dramatically at Noah as they walked past, but that was all.

Remaining perfectly still, I forced myself to breathe, all while my heart thundered in my chest as I waited for Noah to claim the space between us.

"Thorn," Noah said gruffly when he reached me. Dropping his gym bag on the ground at my feet, he cupped my neck with his hands, eyes locked on my face. "You good, Thorn?".

I knew what he was asking me.

Was my vagina okay?

Suppressing the urge to close my eyes and shiver at the feel of the heat emanating from his body, I whispered, "I'm good, Noah."

"Let's get out of here," he growled, his breath fanning my neck. This time I did shiver. It was an unstoppable reaction.

Shaking my head, I sagged forward slightly, finding my balance against my boyfriend's huge frame. "You're treacherous, Noah Messina."

"I'm life," he shot back with a smirk before wrapping his muscular arm around my shoulders. "Let's go..."

Even when it all went to shit between Hope and Jordan, she had continued to wear her wedding band on her pinky finger.

Right up until the last time I saw her, Hope had been wearing that ring.

I was dying to ask her more about Jordan, but I managed to refrain – barely. I begrudgingly had to admit that Noah was right. It wasn’t
morally ethical
to eavesdrop on people's conversations.

Whatever…

"He's yours, Hope," I noted before taking another bite of my sandwich. "Remind him of that."

"Like you reminded Noah?" Hope teased.

"Exactly."

I was three bites into my prawn sandwich when something happened inside of me.

Something strange.

"Oh my god," I heaved, gagging.

"Teagan?" Hope's concerned voice came through the line. "Are you okay?"

"Hope. I have to go!" Tossing my phone down, I clamped my mouth shut, and froze in my seat, unbreathing, as a huge wave of nausea washed through me.

Lewis, who up until this moment had been dutifully ignoring me, cocked a brow. "Are you well, Teagan?"

Was I?

I didn’t think so.

Swallowing the piece of fish in my mouth, I inhaled a slow breath, but that only made the queasiness worse. "I…"

Ugh, speaking was a really bad idea...

Dropping the remaining piece of my sandwich onto my plate, I covered my mouth with my hand and sprang out of my seat.

A bead of sweat trickled down my forehead as I desperately rushed towards the restroom, all while fighting back the overpowering urge to throw up.

I could hear Lewis calling my name from somewhere behind me, but I didn’t dare stop or attempt to answer him.

I didn't have to look back to know that he was following me.

The man shadowed me everywhere, and I guessed Noah paid him a pretty penny to do so.

I had no idea why my body had decided to turn on me like a traitorous bitch, but right now I couldn’t think too much about it.

I was a woman on a mission and that mission was finding an outlet for my regurgitated prawn sandwich and fast.

Barreling my way through the holy grail of a door with the symbol of woman on it, I sprinted into a cubicle and dropped to my knees just as the contents of my stomach decided to make a dramatic exit from my mouth.