Sydney's Song (23 page)

“Let me find out, this is a hotel room. Let me see… Okay, you ready?” he rattled the area code and number to me. “Please call me immediately, sweetheart. What's up? I'm so worried about you.”

His wonderful voice sounded so loving. Concerned and caring. I took a deep breath. Was he going to lie to me? Was our magical love just myth? But why? Why would he lie? Pete had never taken advantage in our relationship. It was him who always gave and gave.He never asked for—well, a
“reward”
. We were very open about it, we had talked it over. But if that woman was to be believed, Pete was craving for—. Had I been too gullible?

In tears I used my phone card to dial his hotel room. Why, oh why was he in the same hotel room with her?!

“Where are you?” I asked anxiously. “Who are you with?”

“I'm in New York. I—”

“New York???” I sounded hysterical.

“Yes. Remember when Mom called while we were talking? She and Dad had just arrived at the airport too. Here in New York. She asked me to postpone going to Boston and join them here. My ex's mother had just died, as it happened. Today's the funeral. Mom wants me to be with them.”

“As what?” I cried anxiously, “Your wife's escort?”

“Not my wife. Darling, please don't call her that. She's my ex.”

“So the divorce is through?”—hopeful.

“Not yet. I don't know. I haven't checked with my lawyer.”

“So you're attending the funeral as her husband,”—devastated.

“No!”

“As what, then?”—confused.

“I only agreed to accompany my parents. Mine and hers have become friends, so I'm just paying respect to the lady. I'll have nothing to do with my ex. In fact, without this funeral I don't even have to see her at all.”

“Is that why she's in your hotel room?”—jealous.

“No,” he sounded really puzzled. Was he lying or not? “She's not here.”

“But Pete,”—suspicious—“She picked up your mobile phone when I called just now.”

“Really?”—in genuine astonishment—“Perhaps she visited my parents and came in here when I was in the shower. I don't know.This is a hotel suite with two rooms, darling. One is my parents' and one is mine, with a sitting room in between. I didn't think to lock my door against my parents. She must be visiting them. I haven't seen her at all.”

“Really?”—sceptical.

“Yes. Mom did call her late last night when we'd just checked in.She wanted to talk to me, but I didn't want to so I cut it short. Had jet lag anyway.”

“Was that all?”—doubtful.

“Well, she said that now her mother had died she'd have more time for me, so I could stop travelling the world. But this wasn't the problem that caused us to separate at all. I've told her firmly that the marriage is over and I don't want to live with her ever again.”

“But your Mom is chummy with her?”

Just then someone entered his room and Pete made a startled sound.

“Go away!” he shouted. “Get out! What do you think you're doing? Get out of my room!”

“Pete, darlin', you look so hot in only that bath robe!” I heard the woman's voice. “Could you please help with my bra?”

“Get out!” Pete hissed angrily. I heard a scuffle. Then a door being slammed and locked.

“Damn…” Pete sounded livid. He returned to the phone, “Sorry honey. That horrible intruder! Had to throw her out of my room.” He talked with barely leashed anger, struggling to maintain his calm speech.

“What happened?”

“Well, the bitch just barged in and started to strip!” Wow, never heard Pete calling anyone names before. Must be truly angry.

“What? You didn't enjoy the view?”

“No!”

“Why should I believe you, Pete? You two were married once.”

“That was in the past. Long over.” He sighed. “I can't change the events before I met you, honey. Anyway, enough of her. Why were you crying, my love?” He sounded deeply concerned. “What's happened?”

“Your ex happened. She said she and you were back together Pete.”

“No way!” he sounded strongly repulsed by the idea. “Honey, ignore her.”

“But Pete, she said she and you had been at it for hours before your shower!”

“God… Darling, she lied. Reckon she was trying to play a mind game on you. Don't buy it, alright? I love you and only you. I'm so sorry you even had to speak with her.” And just like that, just by listening to his caring voice, I was soothed. Talking to Pete always felt very good. But why should I believe him? What if he was lying?My own Dad lied to me.

“I would've thought somebody with her qualifications would be classy and well brought up. And she's four years older than you Pete.Shouldn't she sound mature and dignified?”

“Beats me. She's always been wild. I don't like her, hon.”

“Does she know about us?” I asked testily.

“I don't think so. Did you tell her?”

“I told her you were expecting my call. I think she figured it out.”

“Good. She should know that I have you—”

Just then I heard loud knocks and a muffled voice at his door.

“That's Mom now,” Pete sighed. “Give me a minute.” He went to the door, “I don't need a dark suit. I'm not going now.”

More argument.

Pete came back to the phone, “Sorry honey—”

More disturbing loud knocks.

“Oh no…” a heavy sigh.

This sigh was an eye opener. At that moment, it was very clear to me that he was genuinely miserable. Pete had always been a man of high integrity. Supposing he wasn't lying, supposing I was in his shoes, how would I feel? He was a victim here. I realised my respect for him exceeded my ire.

“Poor Pete. Go answer it.”

“But I wanna talk with
you
. Love, I've missed you.”

The knocking was incessant.

“Darling, go answer it. I have five phone cards. You know, we can talk for thousands of minutes on a landline.”

“I've heard of those cards. But Mark also mentioned cheap calls via internet dialling.”

“Really? Let's find out and compare. After we finish these five cards.”

The knocking was louder.

“Hang on. I'll have a word with Mom.” He went and apparently let his Mom in.

“What do you mean you aren't going to the funeral now?”protested an older voice as the door clicked shut.

“Exactly that. What's the point?”

“What's the point?” her shrill voice escalated, reminding me of irate Your Say callers. “She's been neglected by a husband who went gallivanting around the world! Totally disregarding her welfare for over two years! And now that husband is back home it adds insult to injury if he doesn't support her at her mother's sad funeral!”

“What sad funeral?”

“She's grieving! She was very close to her mother. Unlike
some
people.”

“Her behaviour doesn't show the least grief. She's cunning.Devious. And I've told you we're divorcing.”

“No you're not. A marriage is for life! Even if the court dissolved it, our church wouldn't recognize the divorce. But you're
not
divorcing, Pete. I forbid it.”

“Well I
have
submitted the divorce papers.”

“You. Are. Not. Divorcing. You'll reconcile. Your wife is willing to be everything you ever wanted her to be. You must play your part.”

“Mother, I want no more part. That marriage was well and truly over ages ago.”

“That's why you need a marriage counsellor! You were too young then. But you're a full adult now. You'll behave accordingly. Find solutions to your problems. I've booked the counselling, we'll do everything in Boston. Your wife is coming home with us to stay while she's grieving.”

“No! She can't!”

“I've invited her and she's accepted. It will give you both the chance to be together and make up.”

“Then I won't stay with you.”

“Don't be foolish. You don't have money or a job, do you?”

“I'll find one. Trained myself while backpacking, haven't I? I've learnt to be resilient. Something always comes up.”

“Pete, if you have no more feelings for her then there's no need to avoid her. You can face her and be comfortable about it. Like now.Get ready for the funeral. She's brought in one of your old suits.Looks to be in excellent condition to me. Such a thoughtful wife, she is. Besides being very beautiful. All my friends say she looks like Kate Winslet. She doesn't deserve your neglect. Now please get dressed. We'll all have breakfast downstairs.”

“I'm not going to the funeral. I don't want to.”

“Why? All your friends from the orchestra will be there. As well as everybody who's anybody. Don't shame me, Pete. It will be a great embarrassment for me if you don't go. If you're not going I won't be able to show my face, then I can't go. What a waste of effort in flying here. And don't tell me that 18-year-old bit-of-fluff you've been telling me about has any say in this. I don't want a no-class Australian in the family.”

I heard the door open, close, and lock again.

“Honey?” Pete was back on the phone.

I burst out laughing. “Pete… What a merry welcome!”

“You find that funny?” he fumed.

“Very funny. Don't you?
‘So you're a full adult Pete',
” I copied his Mom's speech, “
'Behave accordingly'
.”

Next he was laughing with me.

“Perhaps moms never trust their children to be adult enough.” He laughed some more. “Sydney… How I miss you!”

“Good to hear. So what are you going to do with your no-class Australian bit-of-fluff, darling?”

“Love her all my life, of course. Mom's choice drinks too much, smokes too much, gambles too much, and sleeps with too many men.I can't believe that when I was 17, those were the very qualities that fascinated me. I thought her sophisticated, exciting, fun. How naïve!I'm so glad I'm over that stage. Well darling, I'm an older eagle with a wider bird's-eye view now, and I don't like any of the things I see in that direction. You have absolutely no competition there. I'll stick with my beautiful down-to-earth Aussie darling, any day.”

“Nice. I love you too. But Pete, you've never told me how haughty your Mom is. I'd always assumed she would be friendly like her brother Craig.”

“Don't worry about Mom. She's from the old-school of old Boston upper-class snobs. She kinda considers it unfortunate to marry an academic like my father, having to live a middle-class existence. But her parents lost their money, somehow, and I reckon Dad is good for her.”

“What about your ex? Your Mom mentioned everybody who's anybody would be at the funeral.”

“Her family belongs to New York's old money. Mom regards that as being very high on the importance scale. All that glitter and glamour. But again, they have a gambling addiction. A few years back they were involved in a dire financial stuff up.”

“Aw Pete, this is all so amazing. Makes me realise our relationship has been pretty much two dimensional. Suddenly we're thrust into the big wide world. I've just heard so many things that make me grow up overnight. Should I worry?”

“No. With you in my life, I have a purpose, instead of just drifting.With you, I have something to look forward to. Please honey… don't doubt me.”

“Okay… But I'm very, very curious, though. A few things nag at me after listening to what kind of personalities your ex and your Mom have. Question time?”

“Shoot.”

“When you quit your marriage, why didn't you explain the cause to your Mom?”

He laughed bitterly. “You heard her, hon. Do you suppose
Mom
would've listened?”

I thought about it. Very gently I probed. Very, very cautiously I asked questions. I didn't rush him.

“Honey, if you must know,” he confessed haltingly. “It's never easy for men to open up… and let others know that they're victims of domestic abuse.”

Whaat? When was Pete going to stop dropping these left-hand grenades? I took a deep breath. This couldn't be easy for him. I had heard that a lot of men died from easily prevented diseases because they felt too macho to visit their doctors. Many hurting souls committed suicide because they could not speak up.

My heart went out to Pete as he slowly recounted the psychological abuse he had had to endure. Turned out his Mom had demanded so much from him since he was a kid.

“That's why you moved to New York instead of joining the Boston Symphony,” I stated.

“Probably. I just wanted to be independent. But in hindsight it could be that in my subconsciousness I wanted to escape living under her thumb, and to my regret, I repeated the experience in that doomed marriage. My ex… threw things at me whenever I refused her anything… once my temple bled quite a bit.”

“But why'd you have refused her anything? You're very generous with me.”

“Sydney, I did wine and dine her. But I drew the line at paying for her gambling addiction.”

“You're kidding.”

“No. Honestly. It actually happened that way. Before we married she used to live with me each time she ran out of money. I paid all her credit cards as a wedding present, mistakenly thinking her gambling was over. But I was wrong… Immediately she hit the clubs again. Well, here in the States people can marry at 18 but can't drink or enter clubs until 21. I was 20 then. And even if I were of age, I'd refuse to go gambling with her. She laughed at me and picked other guys. Really honey, the more you are with a person, more traits will be revealed. Often she was drunk before rehearsals and I had to try to sober her up. When I refused to pay more credit cards, she destroyed my CDs just to be mean. She slept with those guys… Well, she wasn't worth fighting for. I walked out instead.”