Sweet Agony (Sweet Series Book 1) (3 page)

Before I lost consciousness, a vision of hazel eyes set in a familiar, tanned face, embellished with a teasing smile, and short, soft, brown hair so dark it almost looked black floated across my mind. As my heart clenched with a sorrow I was too drunk to brush off, I made myself a silent promise to find the hottest blond I could, pretend he was that actor who played Thor, and ride his proverbial hammer until I forgot what this pain had ever felt like.

Chapter

2

Lucas

Just the thought of her name caused my chest to seize with fresh pain. Respecting her wishes not to contact her had been the hardest thing I had done in my life, but somehow, I had managed. At least, until the day my sister had called me, sobbing because neither she nor my parents had heard from Gin in months.

They had no forwarding address, and she apparently had disconnected her cell phone a few weeks after she had left New York, practically disappearing overnight from our hometown. That was years ago now.

Guilt, rage, and unnamed emotions flooded me upon finding out she had pushed my family out of her life. Her request that I not contact her had been granted, so why had she felt my sister and family had to be punished for my mistakes?

At night, when the memories of bombs, burning bodies, and war haunted me, it was thoughts of the young woman from across the street with a soft touch, a halo of shining hair, and vibrant hues of marker smudged on her skin from her endless drawing that kept me from going completely insane.

She had never known it, but she had been my lullaby. Just the thought of her had soothed my soul, bringing me a small slice of peace to keep me from picking up my weapon and ending it all. But since she had disappeared, reality had crashed down on me.

Finding her and giving her the sort of life she deserved was going to be my redemption from all of the sins and regrets of my past. If I could get her to forgive me and love me again, that would be my reward for surviving what others around me had not. I just wished I could have figured all of this out and pulled my head from my ass before I had broken what I knew now, without a doubt, was mine to protect: her heart.

It was killing me slowly every day not to see or speak to my angel, but I kept myself going with one little hope: one day, Gin would return to me.

It might be an impossible dream, but it was all I had left to keep me going.

A knock on the hotel room’s door brought me out of dark thoughts, and I looked over to see Baker opening it. I couldn’t see his face, but I could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke to the person on the other side.

“Heard you caught yourself a pretty, little kitty.”

Riley Sullivan’s gruff voice replied swiftly, “Shut the fuck up, Baker.”

The older Sullivan brother walked into the room and gave us all a chin lift. After he scanned the entire room, he asked, “Where’s Dec?”

I coughed, trying to cover up my laugh. The man should have known exactly where his brother was. It was where he always was—inside some woman.

Declan Sullivan was by far the biggest man-whore I had ever met. That was saying something since most men in the military spent what little spare time they had on the hunt for a beautiful woman to bury themselves in.

Giving Jaxon a sideways glance, I answered, “I believe he was enjoying some
Candy
. He should be here soon.”

Snorting at my barely veiled answer, Baker plopped his ass in the chair next to Riley. “So … found the old ball and chain, did ya?” he asked of Riley.

This time, I did laugh and didn’t bother trying to hide it. “Yeah, shaking her ass and flashing her tits on the stage. I thought Sullivan was going to go all caveman and drag her away. It was a fuckin’ miracle he didn’t blow our cover. Of course, after seeing what she had to offer, I can’t say I blame him. I’d want to drag her off the stage, too, if I could,” I taunted him, knowing it would be easy right now.

After being divorced for eight years, Riley had run into Kara during the mission we were involved in. Although I didn’t know all of their story, I got the distinct impression that there had been enough pain between the two of them to rip them to shreds then sever them completely apart.

“Stuff it up your ass, Lucas. I can’t wait for the day some woman’s got you by the balls,” Riley snapped.

He had no idea how close to the truth he was. Except, it wasn’t my balls Ginny had in a vice grip; it was my heart. “Not happening, man,” I finally replied darkly. “When I find my girl, I’m not letting her drag me around by my dick. I’m going to show her who’s boss. If that means chaining her ass to my fuckin’ bed, that’s what the fuck I’ll do.” When we were teenagers, I had been terrified of crossing the line. I had thought I was too old for her, so no matter how much she’d thought she was in love with me, I couldn’t make that move. Now, when I found my angel, she was going to get a hard and fast lesson on just how domineering I could be.

Riley’s eyebrows shot up his forehead, seeming surprised by my vehemence. “You make it sound like you’ve already got a girl.”

I shrugged, a little uncomfortable at baring my personal business, and tried to act at least a little nonchalant. “Something like that.”

Baker leaned forward with a curious expression on his face. “When did this happen?”

“A while ago,” I answered vaguely.

Baker’s eyebrows shot up. “What’s a while ago? After our mission in Mexico?”

Shrugging again, I said, “Before then. Actually, I’ve known her most of my life.”

Ginny

“I highly recommend you do not pack that scrap of fabric you call a dress, Miss Wellington.”

Barbara was jittery as I threw clothes in my suitcase as fast as I possibly could. “Look, Barb, it’s like this, I’m going to live it up while I can. Never in a million years did I think dear ol’ Daddy would let me go to Miami. Since he is, I’m going to make the most of it. Plus, this was your idea, you know.” Turning to my long dresser, I started pulling bras and underwear from my drawers, watching in the mirror as my maid pulled the slinky red dress out of my suitcase and threw it under my bed, thinking I wasn’t paying attention.

“Yes, well,” Barbara huffed after committing her devious little dress theft. “I told you to go to Miami. I didn’t tell you to go dressed like a common street walker.”

Turning back to my suitcase, I dropped my underwear in then faced my companion. The woman my father had introduced to me as my maid was a matronly woman in her late forties with short brown hair and a kind face. Today, like every other day she took care of me, she was wearing her short-sleeved, button-up, drab gray dress with a black apron. She reminded me of Mary Poppins sometimes. If only a spoon full of sugar could fix my problems.

Stepping closer to her, I did something I had not done since arriving in Chicago five years ago. I let my emotional barriers down.

Grabbing both of her hands, I held them cradled between my own. She jumped at the contact, and her eyes widened in surprise.

Squeezing her hands softly, I whispered, “Barbara, you don’t know me … not the real me, because I haven’t been able to be the real me since the moment my father took my mother. I know you probably think I’m a nutcase who drinks too much and lives my life with my head buried in the sand, which in a way is true, and I know I’m rambling, but hear me out. I’m dying here.”

Barbara’s eyebrows snapped down in confusion at my abrupt declaration, and she tilted her head to the side.

In a frantic whisper, I continued, “My mother is being held prisoner by a man she loves as much as she fears. My father is a deranged criminal control freak who’s determined to dictate my life down to the type of clothes I wear and whom I am going to marry. In a short matter of time, I’m going to become a pawn in a business deal that will cement my fate to a man I barely know.

“I need this, Barbara. I need the beach, music, and a good time. I need memories of a time when I was free to get me through the years ahead of me, serving as some man’s trophy wife. I just need to be
me
for a few days. Not Virginia Wellington, but the person I consider the real me: Ginny DuBois.”

Barbara’s eyes were shiny with unshed tears. That didn’t stop her from cocking one of those very prim eyebrows of hers and asking me, “And Ginny DuBois needs a little red dress to make her look like a harlot?”

I couldn’t help laughing. “No, Ginny DuBois needs a little red dress to get laid. Now pick my dress up from where you threw it underneath the bed, dust it off, and put it back in my suitcase, lady.” Turning away from Barbara again, I smiled at the snort she gave my command.

As I walked into my connected bathroom, I could hear the rustle of her picking my dress up and shaking it off. She might not like my plans, but something told me she understood my need to get away and lose myself for a little while, even if it was obvious she didn’t approve of it.

Grabbing makeup and hair stuff off of the bathroom counter, I took it back to my suitcase where Barbara stood, staring at its contents in contemplation.

As I dropped the items into my bag, Barbara asked, “Are you certain it’s physical intimacy your Ginny DuBois needs? Wouldn’t she rather run? Disappear from this life?”

I was shaking my head before Barbara finished her sentence. “I won’t leave my mother. Not permanently. Nothing in the world could keep me from coming back to my mom. This little vacation is different. It might not be the smartest decision, but it’s mine. And yes, Ginny DuBois needs to brush the cobwebs off her girly bits and live a little before I’m wearing a shiny new gold shackle on my ring finger.”

Gentle fingers wrapped around my hands to stop my movements of sorting things away. I went stock still at the contact.

I looked over at Barbara to figure out what was going on, and she gave me a sad smile with teary eyes. “I wish I could give you the life you deserve, Virginia. One filled with happiness and a man who loves you as much as you deserve.”

Now it was my turn to give her a sad smile. “No worries, Barbara. I don’t believe in love anymore. If having the man I loved break my heart wasn’t enough of a lesson, then meeting my father again scared the idea right out of me.”

A tear escaped and trailed down Barbara’s cheek. It took everything I had not to cry with her.

Brushing off the sad realities of my life, I turned my thoughts to the plane waiting to take me to Miami. Sure, my father wasn’t letting me go by myself. I would have a few of his men accompanying me to make sure I stayed “safe.” That aside, I didn’t think those men would give a crap if we made a detour to a club or two. I had only been granted a few days of freedom, and I was going to make the most of it. That didn’t leave any time to dwell on long lost loves and a boy I had lived across the street from once upon a time who had broken my heart.

Pasting a big, fake smile on, I turned the direction of our conversation. “Could you go and grab my sketchpad? I want to draw on the plane.”

My ever-efficient maid wiped the tear from her face and gave me a small smile. “Of course, Miss Wellington.” She left my bedroom and headed for the living room where my art supplies were spread across the coffee table.

A picture started to form in my head as I zipped up my suitcase: warm, lightly brown skin tanned by the sun; a hard, muscled body lying on the sand; cool, salty ocean water washing up and over the mystery man’s feet and legs, leaving him glistening in the sun. I couldn’t see his face, but he was hard and beautiful in that uber-masculine way that I imagined soldiers were. I was totally going to draw him on the plane ride to Miami. If I were lucky, I would also find someone just like him to steal a few carnal moments with on my last shot at freedom.

As I looked over the shades of pencils in my kit, my eyes got stuck on red, and my mind went back to a time when things weren’t so complicated, back to where it all began.

Once upon a time, Ginny DuBois’ life had started anew, free from the four walls of fear and thrust into a world where she could be a normal young girl. Once upon a time, Ginny DuBois had been able to believe that fairy tales could come true.

Chapter

3

Lucas

Nine Years Old

I hated mowing the stupid yard.

It felt like a million degrees outside, and sweat was constantly dripping off my face. Dad said I had to because I was the oldest, and my two little brothers were too young to do it, which didn’t make sense to me. Michael was eight, and Noah was seven. If I could mow the grass at nine, why couldn’t Michael mow when he was only a year younger than me?

My little sister Olivia was six, so I could understand why she couldn’t mow, not that Dad would make her. My parents treated her like a freaking princess. Last time I checked, princesses did not play with G.I. Joes, and Olivia wouldn’t leave mine alone.

As I turned the riding lawnmower and made my way down the side of the house to mow the front yard, I saw a flash of brown out of the corner of my eye. Looking over, I saw my neighbor and friend, Johnny Whitmore, throw a football to his dad, making me sigh in disgust. I would much rather be playing football than doing stinking chores.

Shaking my head, I looked back to the grass in front of me.

While I cleared the front of our house, I turned right and started the box design my Dad had showed me how to do. When I reached the end of that row, I turned right again and started moving down the side of our driveway toward the road.

Moving along at what felt like a snail’s pace, I caught sight of a flash of shiny blonde hair walking up our street. I turned my head and saw a little girl about the size of my sister holding hands with a lady who looked like her. The girl wore a white dress, and the sun glared off both her hair and the dress.

As they moved closer, I could see that neither of them looked very happy. The little girl looked kind of scared as she turned her head back and forth to glance around the neighborhood, as if she were looking for someone. Her mom looked really tired, making me wonder if she was sick or something.

By the time the mower reached the end of the row again, the girl and woman were at the edge of my yard. When I turned right, it put us going in the same direction. I knew I should be watching where I was driving because Dad always said that was really important, but I couldn’t take my eyes off the girl.