Susannah's Garden (18 page)

C
hrissie went outside and sat on the top step to think over what was happening to her family. Her hand curled around the ring. It seemed that her parents’ marriage was dissolving in front of her. The minute she’d arrived home from college, she’d sensed that things weren’t right between her mom and dad.

Now her mother was hung up on this guy she’d known as a teenager. Jake was on her mind 24/7. It was obvious. Hardly anything had gotten packed in the last couple of days because her mother was too busy doing her own investigative work, looking for her old high school boyfriend, talking about him constantly with Carolyn Somebody—whom Chrissie hadn’t even met.

She couldn’t worry about her parents, though; Chrissie had concerns of her own. Troy was exciting and fun and—she had to say it—dangerous. Almost every afternoon she made a run into Spokane with him. She didn’t ask what
that was about, but she had her suspicions. He left her in the car while he went inside a “friend’s house.” These visits took all of five minutes and then they drove back to Colville. A couple of times they’d stopped at Loon Lake for a swim. Once he’d taken her for ice cream next to a video rental place.

They spent hours at his friends’ homes. These guys weren’t the type who attended college, either. If her mom knew about Troy’s friends, it would freak her out.

Chrissie brightened as the familiar sound of his truck came from the end of the block. She was off the porch and standing at the curb by the time he roared to a stop.

“Hi.” He leaned out the window, elbow on the edge, and sent her a ready smile. “What’s up?”

Chrissie shrugged. “Not much.”

“Want to go for a ride?” he asked, with the lazy certainty that she would.

“Sure.” She dashed around the front of the truck and climbed in.

“You don’t want to get your purse?”

“Will I need it?”

“No, but I’ve never seen a woman who didn’t drag her purse everywhere she went.”

The problem was, Chrissie didn’t want to go into the house. If her mother saw her with Troy, she’d ask where Chrissie was going and what time she’d be back. Chrissie could live without that particular form of harassment.

“I don’t need it. Let’s get out of here.”

Troy responded with a throaty laugh and grabbed her bare thigh, his fingers creeping under the hem of her shorts. She didn’t stop him.

“We going to Spokane?” she asked.

“Not today.”

“Then where?”

“Ever been to Northport?”

“Nope.” Chrissie had heard of the small town close to the Canadian border. Now she’d see it.

“It’ll be fun.”

Chrissie rested her head against his shoulder. “Everything with you is fun.”

Troy released her leg, shifted gears and they were off. Normally he racked up the volume on his sound system and let the music blare. This afternoon, he seemed to notice her mood and kept the screaming pitch down to a more moderate level.

“What’s wrong?” Troy asked as they pulled out of the city limits. “Is your mother on your case about me again?”

Chrissie shook her head. “What would you think if I moved to Colville?” she asked, testing the waters. She couldn’t imagine going back to school after this summer. Not with the Jason mess and her current indifference to academics. Moving here made a lot of sense. Her grandmother needed her, and that way they wouldn’t have to worry about packing up the entire house in a few weeks. She could live there and take care of everything.

Besides, she’d never had a relationship like this. With Troy, life was one big party and she was along for the ride and loving every minute of it.

“D’you want to live with me?” he asked.

That would definitely freak out both her parents. “I’ll think about it,” she said, but her parents weren’t going to let
that
happen.

He laughed. “Your daddy would probably have me arrested.”

“I told you I’m over twenty-one.” It was a lie, one that slipped easily off her lips. So she’d exaggerated a little.

Troy chuckled and gave her a knowing look. “You’re not twenty-one, are you.” He didn’t make it a question.

“I’m—”

“Just as long as you’re not under eighteen.”

“No way.” Indignation caused her to straighten. “I’m not a kid!”

He stroked her thigh again and laughed.

Then, because she was curious, she asked. “Have you had girls live with you before?”

“A few. They generally don’t last long.” His eyes momentarily left the road and connected with hers.

Chrissie lost herself in the sexual intensity of his gaze, and her breath caught in her throat.

“I have a feeling that if
we
got together it’d be different, though,” Troy murmured.

Chrissie felt as if her heart would melt at his words. “You make me so happy.”

He cocked his head to one side. “Baby, you do the same for me,” he rumbled in a low, sexy voice.

Chrissie ran her hand down his bare arm and smiled.

The highway curved, and Troy drove onto a little-used back road. “There’s something else on your mind,” he said, slowing the truck.

Chrissie stared out the window. “What makes you think that?”

Troy held her chin in one hand and turned her head so she couldn’t avoid his gaze. “It’s in your eyes.”

She might as well tell him; he’d get it out of her sooner or later. “My mom and dad are fighting.”

“I thought your dad’s in Seattle.”

“He is. They were on the phone when you arrived. My mom lied to him.”

“They were yelling over the phone?”

“They don’t fight like that. It’s more these pauses when neither one of them’s willing to talk, you know?”

Troy grimaced. “That’s not how it was in my house. Fights meant throwing things. A couple of my so-called uncles got physical with Mom. More than once, Mom and I ran in the middle of the night so we wouldn’t get the crap beat out of us.”

Chrissie gasped with horror.

“Hey, I survived and I’m a better man for it.”

Chrissie wondered about that. Her respect for his mother, whom she had yet to meet, wasn’t high. She couldn’t fathom any mother putting her child in that kind of situation.

“I’m afraid my parents might get a divorce,” Chrissie told him. That was one of her worst fears. It happened to other families; it could happen to hers, too.

“Hey, my mom and dad never bothered to get married. Does that shock you?”

“No.” From what she knew about his mother, very little would.

“My daddy took off before I was born. The bastard.” Troy’s hoarse laughter followed. “My daddy was a bastard and he made me a bastard.”

“That’s not funny.”

“It’s the truth, so get used to it.” The humor left his eyes.

“I can’t imagine growing up without my dad,” Chrissie said, wanting to wrap Troy in her embrace and give him all the love he’d missed as a child.

“Hey, don’t go soft on me. There were plenty of men around,” he said with a measure of irony in his voice. “My mother saw to that. She married twice before I was fifteen and after that she provided me with a series of interesting uncles—none of whom stuck around.”

“Troy, that’s terrible.”

“Terrible? I’m a survivor because of it. No matter how bad things got, I landed on my feet.”

“What about your mother?”

He glanced away. “She’s all right. Her life hasn’t been easy, but she’s made the best of it.”

“I’d like to meet her.”

Troy didn’t immediately respond. “Someday.”

“Why wait?” Chrissie asked.

“You’re a bit too—”

“Too what?”

“A bit too virginal.”

Chrissie elbowed him in the ribs.

“I’d like to change that,” he said suggestively. “Maybe you’ll let me before the end of the summer.”

“Maybe I will.” Chrissie giggled. Troy made her see life in a completely different way. It was about surviving, and surviving meant not taking anything too seriously, not getting in too deep.

B
y late afternoon, Susannah was beside herself with worry. Chrissie had vanished without a word, without even leaving a note. The last time Susannah had seen her was while she was on the phone with Joe. She didn’t know where her daughter had gone or with whom.

Not that it was hard to figure out. Chrissie was more than likely with Troy Nance. The very least the girl could’ve done was tell her. She had a cell phone. Why didn’t she call?

After an hour of pacing, she’d had it. She decided to escape the house. With a heavy heart, she drove to Altamira to visit her mother. Vivian was with friends, Sally Mansfield and two other women. Not wanting to interrupt her mother’s visit, Susannah only stayed for a few minutes. When she returned to the house, she phoned Carolyn, hoping for a chance to get together.

“You sound upset,” her friend said barely a minute into the conversation.

“I am,” Susannah admitted. “I’ve had a horrible day.”

“Come on over and I’ll commiserate with you. My day hasn’t been that wonderful, either.”

Half an hour later, Susannah pulled into the long driveway that led to Carolyn’s home. The scene was picturesque in the early-evening light; soon, the deer would venture down into the wide-open field next door. If she wasn’t so agitated, she’d stop and appreciate the beauty of the countryside, with the surrounding hills standing guard. She envied Carolyn the tranquility of this lovely place.

The front door stood ajar, and after a courtesy knock, Susannah pushed open the screen door and let herself in.

“I poured the wine,” Carolyn announced from the kitchen. “After the day I’ve had, I need something stronger than iced tea.”

Susannah echoed that sentiment. They sat down in the family room, where the air conditioner blew cool air from the vent overhead. The afternoon had grown unpleasantly warm and it felt good to relax. Had she been in Seattle, she would’ve been preparing for a party to celebrate the holiday weekend. As it was, she’d probably join her mother at Altamira for a barbecue.

Carolyn sat at one end of the sofa and Susannah the other. After a sip of wine, Susannah gestured to her friend. “You go first.”

Carolyn gave a weak shrug. “With me, it’s a bunch of small things that added up to one disastrous day. I didn’t set my alarm, so I overslept, which I almost never do. Consequently I was late getting into the office. My entire day was off-kilter. I was rude to Jim although I didn’t mean to be and after that, everyone avoided me. I often stay late at the office,
but not today. I wanted out of there the minute the whistle blew and frankly I think everyone was just as glad to be rid of me.”

Susannah could sympathize. “I hate it when my day gets off to a bad start.”

“I’ll be checking my alarm clock from now on.” Carolyn tucked her bare feet beneath her as she made herself comfortable on the couch. “All right, it’s your turn.”

“Anything else?”

Carolyn closed her eyes. “Okay, okay, I took the plunge.”

“You and Dave?”

“I didn’t tell you, but we made…sort of a date. For today.” Carolyn sighed. “I ruined everything, though. He was weeding the flower beds this afternoon and I snapped at him and when I left work, I found a note on my windshield that said perhaps we should meet another night instead. Oh, Susannah,” she moaned, “I’m so disappointed.”

Hearing that her friend had acted on her desires was encouraging news. “You actually approached him? Is that how you made your sort-of date?”

Carolyn blushed. It was so wonderful to see Carolyn this excited that Susannah had to hold back a giggle.

“Dave and I…ran into each other,” Carolyn explained. “At He’s Not Here.”

“What happened?”

“Not much… We danced one dance and talked a bit. We decided to meet here tonight and then I had to make a complete mess of things.” She picked up her wineglass. “Enough about me. It’s your turn.”

Susannah wasn’t sure what to tell her first. The most current crisis was her daughter, so she started there. “Chrissie took off…again.”

“With Troy Nance?”

“That’s my guess.”

“Have you considered talking to Sharon about him?” Carolyn asked.

Chrissie would hate it if she went to Troy’s mother, but Susannah was beyond caring. “I saw her earlier today at Safeway. She says she has Jake’s phone number and that the two of them got back together after I left for France.”

“And you believe her?”

Susannah didn’t have any choice. She nodded. “She knew about the St. Christopher medal I gave Jake. I’d forgotten about it, but she hadn’t.”

“Do you really think she’s telling the truth?” Carolyn asked.

Susannah shrugged. “I have to assume she is. Although she didn’t seem to know that Troy’s seeing Chrissie.”

“She knows,” Carolyn muttered. “Trust me, she keeps close tabs on her boy. If you want to find out where Troy and Chrissie are, she’ll be able to tell you.”

As much as Susannah hated talking to Sharon twice in the same day, she had to do it. This ridiculous situation with Troy and Chrissie had gone on long enough. “How old is Troy, anyway?”

“He must be around thirty.”

Susannah frowned. Not only was this guy completely unsuitable, he was far too old for Chrissie. Sooner or later, she’d have to confront Chrissie about her relationship with Troy. When she did, she wanted her facts straight.

“Chrissie’s got you down?”

Susannah ran her fingers down the stem of her wineglass and lifted one shoulder. “She’s only part of the problem. Joe and I had an argument this afternoon.”

“Any particular reason?” Carolyn asked, then rushed to
add, “If it’s none of my business, just say so, but if you want to talk, then I’m here to listen.”

Feeling as wretched as she did, Susannah needed to share her dilemmas. “I didn’t tell him I’d hired a private eye.”

“Oh, oh.”

Susannah sighed. “I know it’s crazy. You can imagine how Joe felt when he heard what I’d done—from Chrissie, by the way, which just infuriated me. And yet it’s my own fault for keeping it a secret. Joe was really angry with me, but he was at the office and couldn’t very well vent with his entire staff listening in.”

“He doesn’t understand why it’s so important for you to find Jake, does he?”

“I don’t completely understand it myself. I wish I could just leave everything the way it is, but, Carolyn, I can’t. It’s too late.” She bent her head, eyes closed. “Joe is my life raft, so why do I keep pushing him away? I can’t seem to help it. I’m risking everything for this, and when I consider what’s at stake, I have to admit it’s crazy. I can’t undo the past.”

“So what happens next?”

Susannah wished she knew. “I have an appointment with the P.I. on Tuesday afternoon.”

“So she didn’t tell you anything yet?”

“Not really. She mentioned putting out some feelers in Canada. I don’t have a clue what that’s all about. She said she’d tell me on Tuesday.”

“She must have some news, otherwise she wouldn’t have asked for an appointment,” Carolyn said.

“I’m hoping she does.”

“If she
has
found him, what will you do?”

Susannah hadn’t decided. Yes, she wanted to talk to
Jake and apologize for her father’s actions. But that could be done over the phone. Seeing him again was something else entirely. Despite herself, her heart raced with excitement at the prospect.

This was wrong, so wrong. She reminded herself forcefully that she was married. Joe was her husband and he was a good man who deserved better than to have his wife hungering after some high school boyfriend.

Yet Susannah no longer felt in control of what she’d set in motion. She couldn’t stop the search for Jake now, even if she wanted to. And she didn’t….

“Susannah?” Carolyn’s voice broke into her reverie.

“What will I do?” Susannah repeated. “I’m not sure.” She took another sip of her merlot. “Chrissie, Jake, Sharon, Joe—that’s not the end of my hellish day, either.”

“You mean there’s more?”

“Yup,” Susannah said, trying to sound lighthearted without much success.

“Go on. You might as well tell me.”

“I found out something about my brother.”

Carolyn straightened and leaned toward her. “Doug? What did you learn?”

“I went out to see Patricia Carney. Her name’s Anderson now. You remember her, don’t you? She and Doug were seeing each other.”

Carolyn nodded, setting her wineglass aside. “I remember the two of them were dating, yes.”

“Right, but Patricia seemed to think there might’ve been someone else in his life.” She stared down at her wine. “In fact, the night he was killed, Patricia was going to confront him and then at the last minute he broke their date.”

“The night he was killed?”

“Yes,” Susannah said. “If he hadn’t cancelled, Patricia would’ve been with him.”

Carolyn’s eyes widened at the implication and when she spoke her voice was soft. “She might have died that night, too.”

Susannah nodded. “We talked about the twists and turns life takes. I promised I’d let her know when I find out who it might’ve been.”

“Hold on, you just lost me. Who might’ve been
what?
Are you talking about this other girl he was supposedly seeing?”

“Yes, but in addition to that, someone’s been putting flowers on Doug’s grave. I thought it was Patricia, but she swears it isn’t, so I assume it’s whoever else he was involved with.”

“She’s telling you the truth,” Carolyn whispered. She reached for her wineglass again and got to her feet. Walking back into the kitchen, she replenished her drink.

Susannah followed. “How would you know that?” she asked.

Carolyn stood on the other side of the counter, eyes downcast. “Because it’s me.”

“You?” Susannah asked numbly.

“Doug and I were writing to each other.”

“What?”
Susannah said, stunned by this revelation. “While we were in France?”

Carolyn nodded apologetically. “Soon after you arrived in France, Doug wrote to ask me how you were doing. He knew how upset you were with your father, and he was worried. I wrote back and he answered. Pretty soon we were writing regularly.”

“And you never bothered to mention this to me?” Susannah asked, angry that the woman she’d considered her
best friend had kept something so important from her. She’d told Carolyn all about her feelings for Jake; Carolyn obviously hadn’t returned the favor. Now that she thought about it, Susannah remembered how eagerly Carolyn had waited for the mail. She had, too. It was what she’d lived for those months in France.

“I’m sorry.” Carolyn shifted awkwardly. She didn’t meet Susannah’s eyes. “I never meant to keep it from you. But the first time he wrote, Doug asked me not to tell you, so I didn’t and then, well…well, one thing led to another and I just never did.”

“The two of you fell in love through the mail? Is that what you’re saying?”

“I guess I am.” Carolyn looked directly at her. “Don’t you remember how frantic I was when Doug was killed?”

Susannah shook her head. She’d been so caught up in her own pain she hadn’t noticed.

“In the last letter I got from him, Doug said he was going to tell Patricia about us. He planned to break up with her that night, I think.”

“You still put flowers on his grave?”

They walked back and sat on the sofa again. “Every few weeks I put flowers on my parents’ graves and Lily’s. I leave some at Doug’s, too. I didn’t realize you’d see them.”

“When you were writing,” Susannah asked, “did Doug—did he say Jake had gone back to Sharon?”

“No. But then, he didn’t write much about Jake.”

Susannah studied her friend. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“I do know that Doug was mad at him about something—he just never said what it was.”