Surviving Love (Montana Wilds Book 1) (20 page)

She turned to him, the words on her lips. The intent to tell him about the pregnancy bubbling up. But he was looking out to their right toward the ranch. His face had closed down, his smile dwindling and the lethal edge creeping into his eyes.

Duke stood off near the house, his own scowl directed at Mikey.

“May and Dan told him he’d be leaving. Duke is blaming it on me,” Mikey said in a low, gruff voice. “His friends think it’s about you. Seems Duke didn’t tell anyone about sending you up to the wilds. I told Noah to stay out of it. Should be an interesting rest of the season.”

“Let’s go.” Sara urged Mikey toward the car, not liking his suddenly bunched muscles and the edge that had come into his beautiful hazel eyes.

His eyes swung down to hers, the fierceness melting away immediately. “Sorry. Of course.”

Without so much as a look behind them, he led her to the car and opened the door for her. “Madam.”

Her butt sank into the plush leather seat as he crossed around the hood and slid into the car. He started it up, slipped it into gear, and slowly took off.

“How are you after our trip? How’s… everything.” Mikey glanced her way as he turned onto a highway.

Shivers racked her body.
Tell him. Tell him you’re pregnant. He’s hinting. He wants to know, just tell him!

Her lips parted, the words on the tip of her tongue. “Good. Not hungry, which is a godsend.”

Coward!

“Yes, it doesn’t take long to forget the worst of the hunger and thirst,” he replied easily, his voice even and unconcerned. “In a few weeks you’ll brush it off as not that bad. Happens to me often. Especially after a particularly rough time out. I hear that’s what happens to women after pregnancy.”

There it was again—a bolder hint. He obviously wanted to talk about it. Ask about it, at least. Except in the woods he’d just come out and asked. He’d been really blunt. Now he was beating around the bush. Was he as nervous as she was? Did he really not want to know?

“This car is really nice, Mikey,” Sara said, her stomach doing flips and waves. She needed a stronger dose of courage.

“You like it?”

She slid her hand along the smooth dash before working with the seat warmer. “It’s the nicest thing I’ve ever ridden in as an adult.”

“I can’t believe that. You didn’t have any friends that did a little frivolous spending?”

“I didn’t really have any friends, period.” Was that her voice that sounded so dour? “I mean, I did. Just… I didn’t hang out with them all that often. Phil got jealous.”

“Of girlfriends? Even when he was out gambling or whatever he did besides look after you?”

“Easy there, killer.” Chuckling, she rubbed his arm. “He didn’t like me spending time with anyone else. Didn’t trust me, obviously, though he always said he didn’t trust other men.”

“And my Sara put up with this? She didn’t give him the knuckle sandwich she was so known for?”

Sara slid her hand along his thigh. He took one hand from the wheel and threaded his fingers through hers. “After a while, I just got used to it,” she said. “It wasn’t worth the fights.”

“Oh good, you come trained. Great. So, I expect a hot meal a half-hour after I walk through the door after work. Because you must know that a man’s day is always long and extremely taxing.”

“Oh yes, of course it is. Much more arduous than a woman’s, even if she worked longer hours.”

“Women don’t work longer hours—they do other things that take them away from their true purpose. The home.”

“Give me a second—I need to make up that knuckle sandwich.”

His deep, delighted laughter rang through the car. “I’ll also need my slippers brought to me along with a hot drink. Or, in the summer, maybe a cold one.”

“Should I rely on my ESP to know which you prefer?”

“Obviously. What else? And, oh yes, I will expect you to work, as well as cook, clean, and take care of the kids, should we ever have any. This is all standard. Although working may be optional, I suppose. I don’t want to be too progressive.”

An image of Phil sitting on the couch with a stained shirt and a beer flashed into her head. He didn’t have a job at that time. He did nothing all day except watch TV. To compensate for the lack of income, she was working two jobs. Yet she still had to clean around him. She still had to make him dinner.

A sudden blast of rage stole Sara’s breath. She directed her gaze out the side window and took a deep breath, chasing away the memory.

“Hey,” Mikey whispered, his voice dropping the underlying laughter. “I’m obviously kidding, you know that. I love to cook. And you’ve seen my house—I’m tidy.”

She squeezed his hand and willed a smile. “It’s not you. Just reminded of my old life. I did all that—except for the kids. Plus, paid the bills, looked after the yard, the handy work—I did everything for myself, and then had to work double to take care of him. My job paid most of the rent, so when he didn’t have a job, which became more and more often, I had to get a second. It was just… it was a hard life with no reward. Not even a ‘thank you’, or an ‘I love you’.”

“I’m sorry,” he said softly as the car turned into a dim dirt parking lot. A few cars loitered near the door of a homely house styled after a log cabin, except for the stone façade. “I was so busy growing up, and trying to get my life in order, that I didn’t act on my thoughts and contact you. I don’t know why.”

“Probably because I had a man.” Sara huffed as the car pulled in next to a shiny truck with a few sacks of oats in the bed.

“No. That wouldn’t have stopped me. Truthfully, maybe it was because I didn’t think you’d want me. Didn’t think I’d deserve you. Still don’t. I would’ve made contact just to be friends, but I wasn’t ready. I didn’t have anything to show you—to make you proud of me.”

The dash lights in the car illuminated those deep-set eyes and high cheekbones. So strikingly gorgeous. So put together and
masculine
; confident; on top of the world. How could he possibly think he didn’t deserve
her
?

“You’re an idiot.” She smiled, tracing his defined jaw. “An extremely handsome idiot.”

He leaned toward her, his lips curved up at the corners. “You are.”

Electricity sparked along their lips when they met. He angled his head, allowing for ease of contact. She opened her mouth, moaning when he filled it in a rush. His tongue ran along her bottom lip and then mingled with hers, his taste like fresh rain in spring. The kiss became deeper, her body singing, her core pounding. He nibbled her lips expertly, just enough longing to tighten her chest, just enough playfulness to keep it light. To make it last.

Her back hit her seat, and she pulled him with her. Her hands slid up his big shoulders and softly glanced off the warm skin on his neck as they wound around him. His hands stayed above the private areas; one resting lightly on her chin, one on her upper back.

They continued kissing, wanting each other, their bodies winding up, yearning for the other. But Sara didn’t want to go any further. She had adult yearnings, but right now she wanted teen virtuousness. Innocence. To share the moment intimately without taking it any farther. He seemed to want the same thing, because his hands stayed in safe zones and he didn’t press too much of himself against her.

They were making up for their lost teen years, and it was perfect.

After an amount of time impossible to determine, Mikey stopped, his lips just barely touching hers. “We’re late for our reservation. We could skip it, but I don’t have a curfew. I can pick up right here after. What about you?”

She giggled. “I told Christie I was sleeping over at a friend’s house.”

“Well, then, we have all night to make out.” His lips hit hers again, his body leaning over further with the intent of one last kiss before they broke apart.

Without meaning to, she clutched his shoulders, not wanting separation of any kind. Not wanting his heat to move away. His kisses became urgent, matching hers. His tongue thrust and retreated in her mouth, their attraction and desire for each other escalating.

Without warning, she was caught up… and swept away. His touch became the only thing she knew. The only thing she cared about. Both her hands found his face as she increased her urgency. Needing him. The kiss deepened, his hand sliding down her shoulder and inward. His large palm cupped her breast, eliciting a moan from deep in her throat.

“Wait,” she said, breathing heavily. “Wait.”

Hot breath against her mouth, he paused. “What? Are you okay?” he whispered, breathing the same air.

“Let’s go eat.”

“Okay.” His lips connected with hers again, deep and needy. The intensity picked up. Passion overcame her. Her sexy parts pulsed, swelling even more.

“Wait.” She pounded on his shoulder.

With a huge exhale, he backed off, lowering his head like he’d just run a mile and needed to catch his breath. “This probably wouldn’t suck so much if I didn’t know how good you felt.”

“Ditto.”

“Car’s not the place for coitus.”

Sara chuckled, the
thunk
of her head hitting the headrest and echoing through the car. “It is, actually, but not at the moment. Let’s do it in a bed. I really,
really
just want to be in a bed. After that, I’ll bump uglies anywhere you want. I’ve never experimented; I‘m ready to let my hair down.”

“In all that time, you’ve never experimented? Missionary with the lights off, or what?”

“I’ve done the normal ones, but never used any toys or lotions or… you know, weird positions. Or even… other places. On my body. That one I might… try.”

Mikey fell against the wheel, the horn making Sara jump. “I need to walk it off. I need to walk this off before I jump you right here.”

She laughed and opened the door. A gush of chilly evening wind crashed into her.

“That helps,” Mikey muttered, his forehead against the steering wheel.

“I never really let loose with Phil, I guess.”

Mikey uncurled from the car stiffly. “He never pushed, though, huh?”

“Not with me,” she said with a dry voice.

“Well. We’ll, ah, work on your… holes in education.”

“Know it all, do you?” she asked with a suspicious eye, throwing her arm around his waist.

“Not with someone I love and trust enough to completely let down my guard and inhibitions.”

“Well said, slut.”

“Thank you, prude.”

Sara stopped as they neared the door to the restaurant. Her eyes widened. In front of the doorway, lying in the dirt, was a deep crimson strip of rug leading out to nowhere. It looked brand new.

“This is a sparsely populated area of Montana,” Mikey said in answer to Sara’s open-mouthed stare. “We don’t have any fancy restaurants, valets, or red-carpeted sidewalks. I had to supply my own five-star greeting.”

She turned to him, eyes glistening. “You went out and bought a red carpet and put it in front of the restaurant yourself just so I could walk in on it?”

“Jake picked it up—we had to get it from the event supply store. But yes. You said you wanted one.”

A tear overflowed and met her smile. “I don’t know what to say.”

He kissed her tenderly. “No need to speak. Let’s just enjoy some red meat we didn’t have to find and kill ourselves.”

“I love you. Sorry it took me so long to realize it.”

He shook his head as his brow rumpled. “You apologize for the strangest things.”

M
ike sat
across from Sara’s radiant beauty as she savored each piece of steak. He was dying to ask about the pregnancy. He knew she had some news—he could tell by the set of her shoulders and the tension in her jaw when he hinted. If he wasn’t such a coward, he’d just come out and ask.

He was afraid he wouldn’t prevent his face from falling in time if she wasn’t pregnant. In his mind he’d worked out all the next steps in their life thanks to that wonderful accident. If she wasn’t, it would be completely fine, but now he had gotten the idea of a family with her in his head. The thought had stuck.

“So, Romeo, what’s next?” Sara asked, reaching for her water.

She hadn’t accepted wine throughout dinner. Wanted hot tea, instead. She wasn’t much of a drinker, but…

“Well, we can hit the bar for a drink…” he said.

A vein pulsed on her jaw. “How about a movie and some cuddling?”

“Men don’t
cuddle
.”

“Snuggle, then. Or canoodle.” She gave him a mischievous grin.

He nodded to the waiter, bartender, owner, and server, all in one man, stationed near the bar with a watchful eye. Immediately, but in no hurry, the man turned toward his adding machine and a scrap of paper.

With a smile, Mike turned back to Sara. “While there is a movie theatre, there is only one screen. We can try, but ready yourself for disappointment.”

“Well, then…” She unconsciously rolled her shoulders a fraction. “Um, what about going to that place where we first caught up? Overlooking the valley.”

“I thought you wanted a bed for our… cuddling.”

“Oh, I see.” She laughed. “You only use the word cuddling when you get a happy ending.”

He couldn’t help his grin as the bill came, slowly but surely. Mike slapped down a credit card before the ticket even hit the table. With a near silent grunt, the waiter about-faced on old bones and headed back to the till.

“That would be a perfect place to end the night. What time do you have to be at the ranch tomorrow?” Mike asked, his palms starting to sweat.

“Not until nine thirty or so, though I would like to take a look around the ranch hands’ quarters and see how their supply system is set up.”

“Won’t stop until you have everything organized within an inch of its life, huh?” Mike laughed, reaching for the slip as Gus returned.

“Wouldn’t you prefer never to run out of stuff?”

Mike stood, and then held the chair for Sara. “I would, yes. Toilet paper shouldn’t be a luxury.”

“So gross.”

As they walked out to the car, Sara held out her hand, but not to hold. Palm up, fingers wiggling, a grin took up her face. “Looks like it drives really nice-like.”

“Nice-like?” Mike said, fishing out the keys. “I thought you wanted to be chauffeured on dates.” He dropped the keys into her palm. “Thought you said I should give the car back…”

“And I thought
you
said it lost a bunch of value. Or something or other.” She clicked the unlock button and headed to the driver’s-side door. “It seems wrong to waste it.”

Laughing, Mike followed her and opened the car door. To her questioning gaze, he said, “I’m all for women’s lib, but in compromise, you have to let me continue to be a gentleman.”

She tilted her head up, and he complied, bending down for a light kiss. His body got a zing and his hard-on returned. He tried to ignore it. He sensed the final reveal coming up, and he didn’t want to wait any more. He needed to know where they stood.

The purr of the motor and soft country music lent the otherwise quiet ride a peaceful melody. Sara was debating what was to come, Mike could see it. Even though she wasn’t talking, he could tell when she was freaking out about some decision or other. And judging by the swishing hair, her grip on the steering wheel, and occasional clearing of her throat, she was absolutely freaking out.

She must be pregnant. She had to be. It wouldn’t be this big of a deal to her if she wasn’t.

Would it?

He should just ask her. What sort of a coward wouldn’t just open his trap and ask?

“Just here,” Mike said quietly, indicating the turnoff onto the long driveway up to the ranch.

“I probably should have let you drive after all,” she replied in a hush, leaning forward to peer out the window. “A streetlight or two wouldn’t go amiss.”

“Yeah, it can get a little darker up here. Are you okay?”

She nodded, the car not doing much more than crawling up the slope. “Good headlights.”

The minutes ticked by. She became increasingly agitated. His palms got increasingly sweaty.

After they finally parked, Mike held her hand as they made their way through the quiet grounds, all the staff headed to bed or to watch TV, and the guests no doubt having done the same. People retired early out here, many working on the sun’s schedule. As there were few lights and no outdoor activities after dark, it made sense.

Their feet crunched and scuffed as they traversed the path. Finally sitting down, Sara folded her hands in her lap and stared out past the drop-off. The stars cascaded down toward the ledge. Mike curled his body around her, resting on his elbow and pulling her body back to rest against his chest.

“So…” Sara said quietly, decisiveness in her voice. “I’m, ah…” She blew out a breath. “I’m just going to come out and say it. I’m pregnant.”

Butterflies swirled through his stomach and turned into a jolt of pure adrenaline, coursing through his limbs. His arm spasmed, constricting around her, before he could control it. His fingers and scalp both tingled.

He wanted it, but he hadn’t been ready to hear it.

“Okay.” It was the first thing that came to mind to block out the curse of surprise.

He was going to be a father!

What kind of father would he make? Would he succeed, and be better than his dad?

What would happen to the little boy or girl if he failed?

What if something happened to him—would his money last for Sara and the baby?

“Holy…”
Shit.

“It’s a shock, I know. And we didn’t plan it, so I totally get it if you don’t want to be involved. I can—”

“Stop,” Mike said. “Don’t start apologizing for this. Never for this. I just had to have a moment to freak out. You should know what that looks like.”

He could hear her relieved exhale. “I can’t see you.”

He leaned forward and hugged her even tighter. “I’m… elated. This is the best news I’ve ever heard. In my whole life. I was afraid you weren’t. I was scared that you would say you weren’t and I wouldn’t be able to contain my disappointment.”

She half turned quickly so she could see his face in the moonlight. “You mean it?” Her eyes reached into him and tickled that spot only she could find—way deep into the center of him where he had always gone to hide from others. The place she helped build.

He nodded, unable to contain his smile. “We’re having a baby!”

He could barely see her face in the soft glow from the moon, but he knew that her smile took up her whole face, just like his. “Mikey, I’m so happy! I want this. With you. But do you think this is too soon?”

“No, and it wouldn’t matter if I did. It’s happening. My God, woman, I love you.”

He straightened up so he could kiss her, sweet and celebratory. He put a hand to her stomach. To their baby.

“We’re having a baby,” he whispered in a delighted hush.

“Let’s go home.” Her soft palm came to rest on his.

T
he night started with passion
, sweet and innocent with the lust and urges of the mature. But as Sara led Mikey to the door, feeling his hand gently slide across her stomach, and his soft kisses on her neck, the mood softened. After he unlocked and opened the door, he swept her up into his arms and immediately carried her upstairs.

Once in his room, with the moonlight falling through the window, he set her down gently in front of the bed and looked down into her eyes. She gently laid her hands high on his chest.

“You’ll have to bear with me, Sara,” he said, tucking her hair behind her ears. His eyes glistened, so soft it made her heart pound. “I won’t be experimenting or going crazy tonight. I just… want to take care of you tonight. Of you and our baby.”

Getting her gulp past that lump in her throat was surprisingly difficult. “Okay,” she managed, her own eyes tearing up.

He nodded once, stroking her cheek with his thumb. He laid a faint kiss on her lips before slipping her dress carefully over her head. His fingers then worked at her bra quickly and skillfully. When the material dropped away, his eyes didn’t scan her nudity. Instead, they went lower, to her stomach.

“How soon will you start to show?” he asked, bending to place a soft kiss on her flat belly. Then again. He laid his cheek against her, waiting for her answer.

“I don’t know. Not for a few months at the earliest, I think.”

He stripped off her panties while he was down there and quickly shed his clothes, his palm traveling the length of her body before circling her stomach again. “This is a trip. Suddenly I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m afraid of hurting you.”

Sara laughed, pulling him back up and rubbing her hands over his perfectly sculpted, mouthwatering pecs. “This is no different than the other times.”

“Yeah, but… it kind of is.”

“I was pregnant two of the three times we’ve done this. I was in a man-made shelter in the middle of nowhere two of those three times. I think we’re okay to do this. Besides, I’m extremely horny.”

“Hmmm,” he said with a grin, bending.

A moan rose from her throat as his hot mouth closed over her nipple. “That’s more like it.”

He stood, his fingers traveling lightly up her inner thigh. His lips graced her neck, leaving a warm trail up to her chin. His fingers traced the lips of her sex, and one finger dipped in.

“Ohhh, Mikey,” she said, her eyes fluttering. “I’ll never get tired of this.”

“Neither will I.”

Quickly, he stood and pulled back the covers on the bed. He lifted her again and gently settled her in a moment later. Rather than pulling the blankets over to cover them, he laid her on her back and settled between her legs, kissing down her stomach.

He paused near her belly button. “Just go to sleep, little peanut. I need to talk to your momma awhile.”

She laughed, running her hands through his thick black hair. His hands pushed her thighs apart right before his tongue dipped into her folds. Sara arched back, clutching the bedsheets. His mouth took in her sex, sucking hard, pulling a moan from deep in her body. His fingers worked inside her, rubbing just right, working in sync with his tongue.

“Hmmm, Mikey,” she gushed. “I love you.”

His tongue worked around her as he sucked, two fingers working her body into an intense heat. Her hips pushed up; she needed more. Her breathing labored. Her back arched.

“Mmmm,” she breathed, eyes squeezed shut.

His mouth sucked harder, his fingers rubbed just right. Her hips worked up and down, pumping harder. Her body screamed for release.

“Oh, Mikey—
oh Mikey
, OH MIKEY!” She clutched his hair and yanked with the ferocity of the orgasm. Her body exploded, then shattered.

After she settled, she licked her lips, incapable of moving any larger part of her body. “Oh my… word.”

Mikey crawled up her limp form.

“No, wait.” She willed herself to move. “I’ll give you a few seconds in heaven.”

His deep chuckle sounded near her ear, right before he lightly licked her lobe. “Next time. Let’s cuddle.”

Her legs spread wider to accommodate his large body. Before she could even nod, his sizable manhood parted her sex and filled her in a firm thrust. He kissed her passionately, one of his hands cupping a breast.

“I love you, Sara,” he murmured against her mouth, the sensations from his body lighting her on fire.

He kissed her again as he drove, his body working low over hers. His hips swung into her, harder, winding her up. She ran her hands up the back of him, her body starting to tense.

“Oh God, Mikey. Oh, oh God. Oh…” She gritted her teeth, the pleasure so sweet it cut. His kisses, fervent and incensed, heartfelt, burned her up. Pressure pushed at her from all sides.

“Mmmm.” She strove harder, clutching his back. Kissing him with passion she barely understood. Loving him in a way that consumed her soul.

“Oh, Mikey,” she cried. “
Ohhhh!
”

Her body blasted apart. Pleasure crashed into her. His body shuddered over hers.

After they’d paused, holding each other, catching their breath, Mikey removed his weight to the side and curled around her possessively. His hand lay on her stomach as they drifted off to sleep.

“
C
’mon
, Sara, go get a present from Santa.” Denise, Sara’s mom, tried to edge her three-year-old daughter out into the crowd of kids hovered around Santa Claus and his booming voice.

Sara shrank back into her chair, bowing her head to hide from the scary animation of one of the fathers dressed up for the mass of kids.

“C’mon, Sara, it’s just Santa. He has presents. Look at all the kids out there. Go join them.” Denise nudged her daughter toward the laughing and squealing pack of kids.

“She’s really shy, huh?” Pam asked, shaking her head at her four boys elbowing each other for position within the pack of kids.

“She warms up to people after a while, but she’s too young to really get what Santa is about. She knows he’s exciting, but try to get her to sit on his lap and no way. She wants nothing to do with him.”

“That’s probably good, though. Being wary of strangers. I wish my boys were that smart.”

Denise laughed and tried once again to coax her daughter into the fun.

Mikey, jostling with his brothers within the mass, looked next to him to the place Sara usually occupied. Not seeing her, he glanced around, Santa forgotten for the moment. He spied her sitting with the adults, quiet and fearful, hiding from the scary stranger in red.

“Oh good, here comes Mikey,” Denise said, ready to nudge her daughter again.