Surrender (THE DRAGONFLY CHRONICLES) (29 page)

He bowed once more though stiffly. “As you wish, my queen.”

That irritated her too. “My queen” was meant for Queen Victoria, not her just because she had a strange birthmark that resembled a dragonfly. The title just made her even more abnormal, something she’d been hiding her whole life. “And my name is Kailin or Miss Whitaker or Doctor Whitaker.”

“Yes,” Moghadam nodded and headed out. He spouted off some directions to Javiv in Arabic.

Jackson’s hold pulled her in toward his chest. “We better make up some shelter since we shouldn’t start a fire, the elemental kind anyway,” he said. Did the skin of her hand flame like her face? She certainly hoped not. “Can I let go?”

She smiled. “I thought you said you never would.”

“Water closets and bathtubs, remember.”

“I didn’t know you were so in need of a wash.”

Jackson laughed softly and released her hand.

Kailin held her breath and the wall around the massiveness of her power. Control, strength, now breathe. Kailin inhaled the chilled desert air.

Jackson untied several folded blankets and a canvas tarp from the one drowsy pack camel left behind. No trees or boulders materialized. They would need to erect a tent without the help of nature. She took a few of the metal stakes Jackson held.

“I’ve put up my fair share of tents,” she said to his raised eyebrow. “Or did you forget that I’m not the feather-wearing, needlepointing type of woman?”

He laughed. “Not likely.” His gaze moved downward over her fitted shirt tucked into the slim pants.

It didn’t sound like an insult so she wasn’t sure how to respond. Jackson turned and erected a folded pole, hooking it into the grommet in the center of the canvas tarp. He had the tent up in seconds. Kailin twisted and pushed the stake into the cold grains. It was harder than she thought without the use of her magic.

“Here,” Jackson said, suddenly at her ear. She jumped slightly. “Sorry,” he apologized with a smile in his voice and placed his hand over her own as he added his force to the sinking of the stake. “The sand is hard to ram through.”

He moved back before she could mentally chastise herself for blushing again. Jackson ducked through the slit of the tent with the blankets. Kailin retrieved the flasks of water and their ration of food. Thank God, she hadn’t destroyed their supplies as well.

She stopped before the tent, arms full, and wet her dry lips. Her heart pounded.
Ridiculous!
Why was she so nervous to share a tent with the man? Because he was a lion, that’s why. Yet it was beyond ridiculous to just stand outside the shelter. She drew in a fortifying breath and stepped into the lion’s den.

****

Jackson kept his eyes on his task of flattening the wrinkles out of the blankets. Good, she’d decided to come inside instead of standing out there all night.

“Uh, I brought in the food and water.”

He glanced up over his shoulder. “No bears here to smell it, though we may have to fight off a croc.”

“A croc?”

He shook his head and sat, his legs straight in front of him. “I’m kidding.”

“Oh.” Kailin knelt onto the blanket. “Not funny. We don’t need any more excitement, uh…tonight.”

Jackson kept his laughter locked tight. He shook his head. “Sorry, you’re right. We’ve had enough going on. Time to rest.”

“Rest?”

“Sleep.”

“Yes, of course,” Kailin said and sounded more than a little flustered. It wouldn’t help matters to mention it.

Jackson took several gulps from a canteen while Kailin unpacked. She set some smoked fish and oat cakes before him. “Is this your typical excavation fare in Scotland?” Jackson asked.

Kailin smiled. “I lived on this and edible mushrooms and flowers for three months.”

He gave her a look of sympathy. “And you chose to bring it on this expedition.”

Kailin’s laughter evaporated the clever remark from his tongue. Musical, free, her unguarded laugh did something strange to his chest.

His gaze connected with Kailin’s and her open humor reduced down to a hesitant smile, but the spark remained in her eyes. Jackson found it hard to inhale.

They ate in near silence. The torch, held up by a rope, burnt down. Soft inhales and exhales from Kailin whispered between them, like someone trying not to be noticed. She failed completely. Jackson was very aware of her there in the dark, not even two feet away.

“Tasty,” he said, and she startled. He swallowed the smoked meat. “Anxious?”

“Dirty,” she responded.

“And dirt makes you jump?” His voice teased.

She let out a soft sigh, so smooth. He wondered what it would feel like across his skin.

“It’s the tent. I only relax outside. Under the stars.”

Jackson recalled the bed on her balcony at the soaring manor in England the night he first saw her. She wore night clothes, her hair flowing, unrestricted, and he suddenly really wanted to see her hair floating free again around her delicate features.

He stood slowly as if confronting a spooked horse. “Come on.” He clasped her chilled hand and stooped to grab the blankets he’d just smoothed. He pushed out into the cool, crisp night, Kailin in tow. No clouds, just a black blanket overhead, bedecked with stars.

Jackson released her hand and a sudden breeze of hot air brushed him. He glanced at Kailin.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. “My concentration is off tonight.”

He smiled and waved the blanket up and then down on the sand next to the tent. No wrinkles.

Jackson half bowed and in an exaggerated flourish, held his hand out to the spread. “Your bed beneath the stars, m’lady.”

Kailin lowered smoothly to sit on her heels. Jackson joined her and leaned back on his hands, face tilted to the sky. Without a campfire, the stars glittered like unclaimed diamonds. Familiar figures stood out, watching.

“Poor Andromeda,” Kailin said and slowly uncurled her legs to mimic Jackson’s casual recline. “Chained, waiting for the sea monster to rip her apart because of her proud mother’s boasts.” She fell silent, head tilted back exposing her slender, pale neck. “Forever trapped up there.” She shivered.

“Up there.” Jackson indicated with a tipping of his chin. “Up there is wide open space though. No monsters, just eternal freedom.”

Kailin continued to star gaze. “Freedom. I have no idea what that feels like.” She shook her head and a wisp of hair broke free from the tight bun she’d refashioned after the attack.

Jackson lowered down completely onto another rolled up blanket that stretched across the top of the woolen bed. He cupped his hands behind his head.

“Freedom comes in all shapes and forms. I suppose Andromeda isn’t completely free since she must rise and move across the sky each night. But we all have boundaries, restrictions,” he said.

“Some have more restrictions than others.” Kailin flattened next to him.

Jackson concentrated on the rise and fall of his chest instead of the weight he felt there. He remained still as if a little movement would destroy the moment. The slight smell of jasmine still infused the air around Kailin. Damn, but the woman sweated out the sweet smell.

She reached back and withdrew two hairpins, letting the lump dissolve into waves of pale silk across the makeshift pillow. Kailin’s arm skimmed his own. He kept his eyes on the heavens, but he barely saw the stars. His complete focus trained on the complicated woman next to him. Silence and space surrounded them where they lay together. As if they were shipwrecked, alone, surrounded by desert and enclosed under heaven’s starry canvas. The only thing missing was the song of the crickets back home.

His fingers found her hand, and he intertwined them into a light hold, her fragility enclosed in his warm paw. “You know you can surrender when I touch you.” She stiffened next to him. “That tight rein you always keep on your power…it must be a constant battle.”

Her body relaxed even though her hold tightened on his hand. “It is,” she whispered.

“You’ve had to struggle to keep it subdued your whole life.”

She didn’t say anything. She didn’t have to. It was obvious there in the dark without the distractions and chaos of life. Everything seemed clear.

“I don’t want pity,” she whispered.

“Good ’cause I’m not dealing out any.”

Silence.

“You grew up in the States,” she said, the soft notes of her voice brilliant against the backdrop of sparkling night. Did she sing? He’d love to hear her sing.

“Yes,” he answered.

“Indian territory?”

“Cherokee territory on the Missouri line.”

“That’s where you learned Cherokee.”

“Yes,
Atsila
.”

“Little fire.” She barely whispered the translation of his name for her.

Silence. Awkward. He could feel the walls erecting between them, her hold on him lessoning as she pulled away mentally.

Hell, he didn’t talk about himself or about the past. The past was gone and there was nothing to be done about it. Only the future mattered. But she bloody hell didn’t trust him. He sighed. “My parents were adventurous.” He gave a little laugh. “They moved right next to the savages as people called them. I was born on the small farm my parents had started. I had an older brother, Kyle.”

“Had?”

“He’s dead. Died of influenza.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jackson paused for a long moment. “The savages,” he exaggerated, “who knew more about living than any white man, tried to save them.”

“Them? That’s when your parents died.”

“Yes.” Jackson felt the cool press of her hand in his. His lips tightened. “Cassy worked alongside the Cherokee medicine man, but…” Why state the obvious?

“Your sister survived.”

He chuckled softly. “She’s the strongest of us all.”

“The wheelchair?”

“Some time after they died. I wasn’t around. I didn’t know.” She squeezed his hand. He almost drew away. Talking about the bloody past was foolish. It just brought pain. “She was living out there alone and got sick. Not influenza but the Polio-
myelitis
. I found her being nursed by the Cherokee in their own settlement. She hasn’t been able to walk since, and she’s growing weaker still. She’ll die if I don’t find something to save her.”

“Which is why you brought her to Egypt,” Kailin said as if she suddenly saw everything so clearly. But she didn’t. She didn’t know his secret. How he would do anything to save his sister, to make it up to her for not being there when the rest of his family wasted away beneath her once strong hands. For leaving them all and heading out on his own in search of treasure. She didn’t know how he would make it up to her, to them.

****

Kailin waited but no further information came. Her mind worked through the picture Jackson’s words had created. A boy raised with an older brother and a younger sister, on a farm in Indian territory. His playmates were the savages people feared and despised. Being the middle child, the younger boy, he’d probably wanted to find his fortune elsewhere and left when he could. And when he returned, most of his family lay buried. Only his sister remained.

She refused the burn of pity tears at the back of her eyes. Jackson Black didn’t want pity any more than she did. How about comfort? Everyone could use some comfort.

The night air was diving into low temperatures, and she shivered. Jackson threw a wool blanket across the two of them. “You should probably get some sleep,” he murmured.

Sleep? Did she really want to sleep? Hmmmm…no. The heat from his body filled the small space under the blanket. Warm and all man, Jackson exuded power and strength without a bit of magic to back him up. That was true courage. Unlike she who spent most of her days afraid of making a mistake like she had tonight. A mistake that blew the side of a hill apart, risking irreplaceable lives and artifacts. Panic, anger, loss of control. She’d battled them her whole life. Never letting herself let go or else—disaster.

Kailin exhaled deeply. No, she didn’t want to sleep. She wanted…to feel something, something more than worry and regret and constant restraint. She wanted to surrender, lower her defenses, let herself feel life.

Jackson. What other being could she totally lose herself with? What other man could she allow to touch her and not cause the world to quake? She couldn’t even imagine wanting to try another man. Kailin knew already that she would never marry. The secrets of the Ice Princess would die with her. Except Jackson knew her secrets. He’d seen them in action and hadn’t backed away making the sign of the cross as if she were some devil.

Kailin caught a glimmer in her periphery.

“A shooting star,” Jackson said. Kailin followed the faint fire trail in the sky. “The Micmac Indians,” Jackson continued, “say that’s one of two sisters trying to get home. The elder made it and the shooting star is the younger one who messed up and was turned to flame. Yet she still tries to return to her people.”

Kailin held her breath as the diamond faded into the black tapestry. She drew in air to fill her lungs with courage and rolled toward Jackson so that one elbow propped her over his chest. His gaze turned to her.

Intense. Questioning. Waiting. He stared.

“Two lost people trying to find their way to homes that no longer exist,” she said. She shook her head and wet her bottom lip. His gaze shifted there. Was he breathing? Kailin inhaled and lowered her face to his.

She meant to stay in command of the kiss, her need for control difficult to surrender. She touched his lips gently, but Jackson’s heat plunged into her on contact, melting her hasty plan into a puddle. His strong hands reached up and cradled her face, tilting her over him to deepen the kiss she’d started. His taste, the feel of his hands over her cheeks, down the skin of her neck, sent hot tingles throughout Kailin’s body. What was this magic that he wielded? Panic bristled inside and she pulled back for a hasty breath.

“Whoa there,” he whispered and brushed his lips against hers, rolling her to the side. He wasn’t over her but next to her. She could still see the sky overhead yet his weight pinned her lightly. He descended, his lips tentative. Yet all it took was an inhale of his scent to release the tingles once again. Kailin reached behind his head, urging his face closer, his lips harder as she slid across his.