Strip Teaser (Naked Night's) (6 page)

The skanky blonde at the bar is all over Guido. If she's trying to do an impression of a limpet she's doing a good job of it.  Her artificially inflated chest is pressed against his shirt and she's practically wrapped one leg around his.  Her slightly too small body con dress is stretching at the seams as it is, without the leg moves.  Guido doesn't look uncomfortable at all though, if anything he's lapping it up.  Her painted nails are playing with the top button of his shirt as she undoes one, then two of the buttons and draws her nail across his naked flesh.  If that's supposed to be seductive, it's not. Someone pass me a sick bag before I throw up.

She tosses her backcombed mane over her shoulder, reaching in to whisper in his ear.  The way his smile lights up his face you'd have thought she'd just told a small child it was Christmas morning.  Guido turns and high fives Jonny before mumbling something I can't hear, and leaving the bar, the girl still attached wherever she can to his body like some slimy suckered octopus.  I shiver with disgust. 

Tiny and Alex just exchange raised eyebrows and shrug.  It's obviously standard behavior for them to witness.  Jonny, Jackal and Rick are still drinking at the bar.  Looks like Miss Barbie left a few of her friends behind. Despite their best attempts the guys aren't looking overly eager to follow in Guido's footsteps.

"Does this happen often?" I ask.  Shit. I can't help the distaste that showed in my voice.

"Too often." Eric answers. He looks pissed. 

"We all get propositioned, a lot." Tiny answers me. "Difference is that Guido's really the only one to take advantage of it. He's got a bit of a reputation with the ladies as some sort of Italian Stallion."  I smother a laugh. I'm pretty sure from what I already know that Guido aka Gareth from Cleethorpes has no Italian ancestry in him whatsoever.

"The problem is doing this sort of show attracts the wrong sort of women." Alex is thoughtful before he continues. "They're not the sort that are looking for a relationship. They're after a quick fix. They just want to go back to their mates and say they slept with a male stripper. It's kudos for them.  They're worse than guys for bragging rights."  Alex sounds so disappointed.

"So you don't take advantage when it's offered?" I sneer. I can't believe I just asked that. I'm never normally this aggressive in a social conversation.

"No, I don't." He huffs. "I have dignity; and last time I looked, I have taste.  I'd rather meet someone like you." Alex stops talking suddenly.  Was that a compliment he just paid me or something more? I'm no good at picking up on things like this.  Whilst I'd like it to be more than a compliment I tell my inner voice to shut up and simmer down. He must have just been trying to be polite.

"I don't think in the time I've known Alex I've ever seen him go off with anyone,” laughs Tiny.  Alex gets up to go to the bar, taking our empty glasses with him. "The guys are convinced he's gay, and to be honest, I have my suspicions as well." Tiny adds in a whisper next to my ear.  Just my luck. The first decent guy I come across in ages and he's batting for the other side. That would explain why I feel so comfortable around him though; he's not a threat.

"What about you then, Tiny? You sample the goods?" He looks affronted, and pulls a photo out from his wallet. It's crumpled from use but it shows him and a petite but very attractive brunette with their arms around each other, smiling broadly at the camera.

"Nope, I have my girl at home, and I'm a good boy." He smiles, passing me the photo for closer inspection. "This is Alison, my fiancée. She's a teaching assistant. We're getting married next year when I quit."  Tiny looks so proud when he's talking to me, but the word quit brings Eric's attention back to the conversation. He doesn't look pleased.

"You can't quit Tiny, the group needs you. Let me talk to her and see if I can get her to change her mind." Eric pleads.

"It's not Alison's choice, Eric. It's mine. I've been doing this since before I met her. I'm getting too old for this shit.  If it's not the traveling it's the rehearsals, if it's not the rehearsals it's being objectified by that bunch of screaming harlots." There's just a hint of anger in Tiny's voice. It's subtle, but I hear it. I get the impression this is a conversation that's been repeated one too many times for him.

Eric shrugs his shoulders in defeat, not answering.   It feels uncomfortable. Alex returns with the drinks and looks at us, as if wondering why we're not talking to each other. I try and break the silence by telling Tiny how pretty Alison is.   We talk a little longer before I excuse myself to go to the bathroom.

There's a stall that's occupied when I walk in and I can hear muttering and mumbling as though the occupant is talking to themselves.  I'm about to lock the cubicle door and make use of the convenience when I hear the conversation in the stall next to me. I stop, shocked and slowly back out.

"What do you mean you've finished? You haven't even put it in yet." That one's a female voice.

"I'm holding a condom full of come, of course I've bloody finished." the male voice retorts. I almost gasp out loud when I realize they're having sex in a Travelodge bathroom stall. Aside from it being so public they're not the roomiest place I can think of.  Why wouldn't they just go upstairs to a room?

"You selfish prick" the female voice screeches. "You didn't even get me off, and your cock's that fucking small I'd need a microscope to find it."

"Well if you weren't such a loose slag you'd have felt me come." he retorts. I recognize the male voice now. It's Guido!

There's more shuffling and movement inside the stall and I hear the unmistakable sound of a zipper fastening.  I have to get out of here, fast.

I manage to make it out of the bathroom just in time. I hide in a corner behind a potted plant, waiting for them to pass and head back into the bar. All the while they're grumbling and muttering at each other. 

My need to pee has deserted me so I head back to the sofa, taking my seat next to Tiny.  I've just picked up my glass and taken a mouthful when I hear the screechy voice talking to her friends. I spit my drink across the table when she utters the immortal words "Best fucking cock I've had in my fanny in month’s girls."

Tiny looks on in puzzlement as I sit there, laughing so hard there are tears pouring down my face.

Alex and Tiny wouldn't let it rest until I'd told them what I'd been laughing so hard about. I struggled to get the words out for laughing.  I'm sorry, but this girl made the women on the Jeremy Kyle show look classy; and that's saying something.  She stood in that toilet complaining about Guido's lack of sexual prowess and in the next breath is telling her friends how good he was. Either she's a bold faced liar or she really has had some bad sexual experiences.

"That's what it's all about." Tiny looks sad as he says this. "These girls are just after bragging rights. I think some of them would run a mile if we asked them for their phone number." he smiles.

"Yeah." Alex agrees. "And that daft bugger just goes along with it every night." he looks over to Guido who's deep in conversation with Jackal.

"Come on, grab your jacket. The cinema's just a short walk from here. Let's go see if we can find something Tiny won't cry over tonight." Alex pushes on Tiny's shoulder. You can see the affection on both their faces. They have a much closer bond than the other guys. 

As we pass the bar on our way out the girls are still cackling amongst themselves, a couple of them throwing longing glances towards Guido.  I wonder how they'd handle finding out for themselves that their friend was as loose with the truth as she is with her morals.

Tiny casually throws his arm around my shoulder as we walk.  Alex is on the other side of me.  Despite Tiny being closer, it's Alex's warmth that I can feel.  There's a glow down that side of my body, and I feel drawn to him.  After Tiny's earlier declaration that Alex is gay I need to calm down my libido and quickly.  I can settle for friendship.  My mind might be okay with that but the tingling between my legs tells me my body has other ideas.

***

The movie was
okay; I can't say that I remember much of it.  I was too conscious of Alex sitting by my side the whole time.  Tiny bought the biggest tub of popcorn he could find, plonked me on the seat in the middle along with the popcorn and proceeded to eat most of it single handed.  Alex reached for it at the same time as me once. There was a tingling as our hands touched, and I pulled mine away shocked.  Alex gave me a slightly puzzled expression, but carried on slowly munching away; oblivious to the turmoil my body was in.

The walk back to the hotel was pretty quiet.  Tiny cracked the silence with the odd joke from the movie but other than that we kept to our own thoughts.

"You got the bike sorted for tomorrow?" Tiny looks over at Alex. I prick my ears up a little.

"Yeah, the guy I spoke to is bringing it to the theater in the afternoon.  He's got a red and black Harley Road King. Should look good with the leather and the lights." Now I'm intrigued.

Tiny obviously notices my interest and puts me out of my misery. "Alex has a routine planned using a bike on the stage tomorrow night. You coming to rehearsals to watch?" Alex, a bike and leather? I think they'd struggle to keep me away.

I watched Alex rehearse this afternoon and his performance looked great, but tonight I've moved out of the wings to stand at the back of the auditorium so I can see his act properly.  Jed, the owner of the bike, is standing next to me.  He's been a bag of nerves all day; that's his precious baby up on that stage after all.  He's polished every millimeter of chrome and the red paintwork sparkles in the stage lighting.

Right now the stage is in darkness, as the gentle guitar strum intro to
AC/DC's Highway to Hell
is played through the sound system.  As the rest of the music kicks in there's a flash of fire before a single spot hits the stage. Alex is
revealed; standing astride the bike in the sexiest black leather outfit I've ever seen.

The bike is sideways on to the audience, secured in place with the center stand. Alex is standing atop it, facing the audience, legs spread wide for balance.  At the next beat he leaps down to the front of the stage.

The black leather jacket is open revealing glimpses of his toned abs, and his arse, oh god his arse, is revealed in tight black boxer briefs whilst his legs are covered in black leather chaps.  My jaw drops.  He looked hot backstage just before he went on, but in this setting, the crowd has gone crazy.  My knickers just got a little bit wet as well.

"Fuckin' ell." Jed mutters at the side of me. "Bet you wish I looked like that in me leathers." He smiles at me before turning back to watch the performance.  I grin, he's fifty if he's a day and I don't think if he was half that age he'd look as hot as Alex right now. 

Alex thrusts and dances his way around the bike.  I can't believe how agile he is in the leather; at times he kneels down throwing his hips forward. At the chorus he caresses the bike like it was some kind of lover.  He straddles the front wheel, grinding his hips towards the forks and handlebars. He turns his back to the audience, drawing the leather jacket off one shoulder then the next and teasing it down his back.  In just one shrug it's gone and cast aside.  The audience screams at him to get the rest of his kit off.  They might be bloody heathens, but I can see a real art in this performance. You can tell Alex has a dancing background.

He lays down flat to the stage, humping up and down suggestively with his groin.  I can't help but wonder how that would feel if he was in bed with me.  I give myself a gentle shake to remind myself that's never going to happen.  Now I'm jealous of the lucky bloke that gets to experience that.

At the next chorus he moves to the back wheel of the bike, grinding against the seat. God, I wish I were that leather seat right now.  He struts around the stage, pumping and gyrating his hips, circling closer to the front as he goes. At times he falls to the floor, snaking his way across the front of the stage using his hips.

At the words 'and I'm going down' the lights go off as Alex drops to his knees, his head in his hands, a single spot highlighting him on the stage with the shadow of the bike in the background.  He's glistening all over, his chest glowing with sweat.  He stands slowly, shakes himself down and in one swift move pulls off the chaps to 'on the highway to hell'. The crowd stands and screams and the light goes out, leaving the stage in darkness.

"Wow." Jed is lost for words. "I'm a bloke and that was bloody hot." he sighs.