Strictly Business: Hooded Pleasures, Book 1 (15 page)

“You think he’s not in love with me?” Kate wasn’t sure what she wanted to hear. If Alex was only infatuated with her Domme persona—

“I know it’s his choice to make. He’s got to figure this out as well. Don’t think your exit didn’t affect him. He’s no fool. He saw you bolt, and now he’s trying to figure out what he thinks, what he feels. He’s got to figure out what he wants for himself, and that you can’t do for him. You can’t tell him what to feel and what to do.”

“I didn’t want to hurt him,” Kate protested.

“You didn’t. You opened his eyes to a brand-new world, something he asked for and wanted. So don’t go punishing yourself on that front,” Wendy said. “I’ve seen this before, Kate. You’re not the first one or the last to get hit with this.”

“Oh.” Kate wasn’t sure whether to be happy or sad at the revelation. There was some comfort in knowing she wasn’t the first employee to have this issue.

“Let’s give you both a time-out and see how you feel in two weeks. I’m sure he’ll be intrigued by Danielle. Maybe it’s the whip more than the whipper he wants.”

“That’s what you think?” Kate said.

“I don’t know what to think, but I do know you need to step away. Let’s give you both a break. Treat yourself to a day spa, get your thoughts together. Figure out what you want. Let us worry about Alex. Call me in two weeks, and we’ll talk again.”

The line went silent.

Kate finished off her wine.

Two weeks.

What would Alex think?

What would Alex do?

She wasn’t sure she wanted to find out.

He’d showered and cleaned up, finished off the last of the pizza and grabbed a cold can of soda before sitting in his living room to try to figure out what the hell just happened.

It was a poor choice of location.

He couldn’t stop glancing at the computer desk. The monitor was running a screensaver now, the fireworks exploding across a virtual space field.

His attention went to the floor, reliving the experience of only a few hours ago.

Right there.

On his floor.

Damn it.

Alex rolled his head back, forcing himself to look at the ceiling.

He snatched up the television remote with his free hand.

What happened?

What the hell happened?

She—

He chewed slowly, trying to wrap his mind around recent events.

For those few hours, she hadn’t been the professional Domme from Hooded Pleasures. Not while she smacked down bullies in the virtual world they shared, talked about her past and let him feed her pizza.

Not when she’d let him kiss her.

He’d kissed the real woman, the real Kate. And, judging from her reaction, she wanted it as much as he had.

Now what?

The phone rang, startling him out of his reverie.

He almost spilled his drink as he scrambled to find the phone, finally retrieving it from between the couch cushions.

“Mr. Hanson?”

He recognized the voice, even though it’d been months since they spoke.

Hooded Pleasures.

“Yes?”

“I’m calling to inform you that Kate is ill and will likely not be available for your appointment next week. We’ll arrange for another—”

Alex frowned. “What do you mean, ill? She was just here a few hours ago.” He rubbed his forehead. “Is this because I had to cancel the appointment? I’m willing to pay for her time even though nothing happened. It was a work emergency, and I—”

The polite voice cut him off. “I received notice Kate was home sick. She became ill after leaving your home. You know some of these flu bugs can sneak up and hit you without any warning.”

Alex didn’t want to tell her he knew bullshit when he heard it.

“When this happens, we like to make alternate arrangements in case she doesn’t recover in time. Your needs come first.” The calm female voice held underlying steel. “If she’s unable to make your next appointment, a substitute will be sent. This is to alert you to the possibility of it happening so you’re not surprised if an alternate appears.”

“I want Kate.” He tried not to sound like a whiny little boy.

He failed.

“Kate, as I said, may not be available. I’m sure Danielle will be a suitable replacement if necessary. We’ll call in the middle of the week if there’s a need for any further updates.” She hesitated. “We’re sorry for the inconvenience.”

“No, no.” He rubbed his forehead, feeling a headache starting. “I’m sorry. I was just—”

“I understand,” the unseen voice said, her tone softening. “We realize this is disappointing and upsetting, but we ask you to at least be flexible for at least one week. Thank you for your help.”

“Yes. Thank you.” Alex looked at the phone, trying to figure out what was going on with Kate.

My Mistress.

Is she?
His inner voice whispered,
Will you remember her name in a week, or will Danielle take her place?

It was obvious this was an excuse to get out of her next appointment with him. She hadn’t been sick while with him. She’d been very much hale and hearty.

He closed his eyes and heard her moan into his mouth, the sound almost breaking his self-control.

Whatever had happened had broken the link between them, and he knew there was nothing he could do on his end.

All he could hope for was that she’d come back to him.

All he could do was wait.

Chapter Ten

Kate had been blocked creatively before—when her mother had told her she was getting married for the third time. When she’d walked in on her college roommate with her professor working on “extra credit”.

When Carl had left.

But this was the deepest, the worst she’d ever been. Hours had turned into days, and it dragged her into a void she didn’t see an escape from.

She couldn’t draw, couldn’t even begin to sketch. It was like her creativity was snarled up in a Gordian knot.

Kate surfed the websites, looking for inspiration. Webcomics, virtual museum tours, one link to the next to the next. Searching for the one image, the one phrase that would unstop the mental dam holding her creativity back.

She streamed her favorite television series in a viewing marathon. Documentaries. Movies she’d planned to see years ago and never got around to.

Her to-be-read stack of romance paperbacks dwindled to nothing.

She switched to her electronic stack and whittled it down.

The calendar glared at her accusingly as she finished cleaning the kitchen.

It’d only been a week.

Finally Kate gave in and called Ann.

Ann answered on the first ring. She listened to Kate’s mumbled, jumbled explanation about her impromptu vacation.

Finally Kate ran out of breath and stared at the phone.

“Stop.” Kate imagined Ann holding up her hand. “I’ll be over in an hour with a bottle of wine. Eric’s got some of his buddies coming over for a video game marathon so he won’t miss me and we won’t be disturbed.”

“But—”

“No buts. You’re freaking out and I’m not even going to try to handle this over the phone. You dig up some munchies, and I’ll be there soon.”

Kate hung up the phone and sighed.

The rambling had started the second she’d opened the door and seen Ann standing there with the bottle.

Kate burst into tears and babbled the entire way back into the kitchen, where she’d snatched a tissue from the half-empty box on the counter and tried to regain her composure while digging in a cupboard for the comfort food she knew was there.

“You’ve been like this for a week? Why didn’t you call me earlier?” Ann shook her head. “What are friends for?”

“I just—” Kate ripped open a bag of chips and placed it on the counter in front of them. “I thought I’d be okay. I mean, it’s only a break.”

“A break from what you like to do. What you love to do.” She handed Kate the wine bottle. “You know my track record on opening these things without breaking the cork.”

Kate chuckled as she found the corkscrew in a drawer and began peeling away the seal.

Ann eyed her. “So do you like this guy?”

“I’m not sure.” Kate wrestled the cork free and filled the waiting glasses.

“Liked him enough to sit and play on his computer for hours, let him feed you pizza and then kiss the hell out of him,” Ann said. “That’s something.”

Kate paused. “I’ve also, ah—” She looked at the bottle and considered taking a very unlady-like swig before continuing. “I’ve also had sort of thoughts about him.”

Ann stared at her. “Thoughts like ‘Oh, what a pain it is that I have to go to his house’ or ‘Oh, Alex, I wish you were my vibrator’ thoughts?”

Kate felt her cheeks heat up.

“Wow.” Ann blinked. “Wow.”

Kate handed her a glass. “It doesn’t mean I like him. Or love him. He might have just been there at the right time. I got caught up in the emotional rush, grabbed at something to make myself feel good. It might not mean anything.”

“Okay.” Ann waited until Kate had filled her own glass before continuing. “If you’re not sure if you’re in love or just in lust, why don’t you get thee hence to one of your clubs and grab some guy, beat his ass for the night and then kick him out of your bed in the morning? That should tell you what you’re feeling. If it’s love, you’ll miss Alex, and if it’s lust, you’ll have a great time and walk away satisfied without feeling guilty.”

Kate sipped the white wine. It was a cheap vintage they’d become addicted to in college. “It’s not that simple.”

“Explain it to me.” Ann grabbed a handful of chips. “What’s the difference between what you do at Hooded Pleasures and what you’d get at the club?”

“It’s—” Kate waved a hand in the air. “It’s not the same. If I go to the club, I don’t want to be
that
woman, the one picking out a guy for nothing more than sex. It’s not what I want, it’s not me.”

“And this type of work is?” Ann raised her eyebrows.

“Yes.” She sounded more confident than she felt. “I go in, get the job done with no expectations. Turn the guy on and leave him wanting. I go home, and if I want to get off, I can—” She wriggled her fingers.

Ann frowned. “Yeah, but it’s a lot better when you’re not giving yourself carpal tunnel syndrome, right?” She pressed on. “You’ve been doing this for a year. You should know when it’s not just a job. Maybe it’s time for you to move on from Carl, get out of this scene.”

“I’m not going to change who I am.” Kate chomped down on a thick chip and sent potato shards flying across the freshly mopped kitchen floor.

Ann smiled. “I didn’t ask you to give up being a Domme. I’m asking you to think about being open to possibilities.”

Kate couldn’t help chuckling as she plucked chip shrapnel off her shirt. “That’s an odd word choice. Besides, I’m fine where I am.”

“So fine that you called me over and we’re standing here chugging wine and eating chips while you sob into your tissue. After telling me you’re taking two weeks off from, and I quote you from a year ago, ‘a dream job’.”

Kate couldn’t hold back a scowl. “You’re not helping.”

Ann reached for the wine bottle. “I’ve already offered to set you up with some nice guys. Multiple times. And you’ve refused me. You want a specific type of guy, I understand. But you can’t suck and blow at the same time, play the game without getting burned at some point.” She grinned. “Yeah, I went there. Sue me.”

Her expression changed to serious, all humor gone now. “Now you’ve got something going on with Alex, but you’re not sure what it is or if he even feels the same way.”

The mere mention of his name shot her back to straddling him on the floor, to the taste of his mouth and his fingers on her ass.

Oh God.

“You got it bad.” Ann snapped her fingers, bringing Kate out of her reverie. “I see that look in your eyes. You like this guy a whole lot.” She smiled. “He makes you happy.”

“Yes,” she admitted. “But it’s not all about me. I don’t know if he’s interested in me or the scene or—” She shook her head. “I don’t know what to do.”

“It’s out of your hands, right? So you wait out the two weeks like your boss said.” Ann refilled both glasses to the top. “If it’s right, then it’ll work itself out. If not, then you’ll know.”

“I’m not used to letting someone else decide this sort of thing,” Kate grumbled. “I don’t like it.”

Ann laughed and raised her glass. “Welcome to the world of love, sweetheart. It’s a bigger and bitchier Domme than you are or ever will be.”

Danielle was…nice.

A nice woman.

An excellent Dominatrix.

She’d picked up on Alex’s profile with unerring precision.

The sweat dripped from his forehead as he pressed his face into the pillow, spread-eagled across his mattress as he’d been so many times before.

The flogger slapped across his shoulder and sent shockwaves straight to his groin, his cock hard and aching for release.

She was good.

But she’s not Kate.

He closed his eyes and called up one of his dreams, imagining Kate taking charge.

It helped, but not enough.

The soft chime signaled the end of the session. He heard Danielle cross the room and tap in the code on her phone.

Alex sighed and turned his head.

Danielle smiled, holding the leather flogger in one hand. She wore a red-and-white leather outfit, the bands crisscrossing her tanned skin in all the right places.

He’d gotten hard watching her approach the house, sliding from her car and striding up the driveway. It was difficult not to appreciate a good woman, a strong woman, and a woman who knew what she wanted and how to get it.

Like Kate.

But she’s not Kate.

Danielle undid the restraints and stood back, waiting.

Alex rolled to one side to get off the bed. He knelt at her feet, eyes on the floor. His head spun, the momentary faintness tinged with arousal.

It was…okay.

He didn’t reach out for her, didn’t grab her like he did Kate.

He didn’t feel the need, didn’t feel the urge.

She didn’t notice.

“Thank you,” Danielle purred as she patted his head. Her fingers rolled through his short hair. “I appreciate your willingness to allow me this. Mistress Kate has trained you well.”

Too well
, his inner voice yelled.

And yet not enough.

She sat beside him and pulled him into her lap for a long leisurely hug, sharing an energy bar with him.

Alex sighed, feeling the endorphins slowly ease out of his system.

“You’re a lovely man,” Danielle said as she stroked his shoulders. “I’m very happy to have shared this time with you.” She opened the bottle of water and offered it to him. “There aren’t too many who take to this so quickly. According to your file, you’re still relatively new to the scene.” She smiled. “You’re a quick learner. Such a prize.”

Alex sipped the water and nodded. Danielle wasn’t Kate, but he’d be a fool to pass up a cuddle session with such a beautiful woman.

Her hands slipped around the leather collar and undid the tiny lock. She carefully pulled it free and relocked it before handing it to Alex.

He tossed it up on the bed before curling up into her embrace, now familiar with his own recovery cycle.

Finally, Danielle gave him one last tight hug and sighed. “I think we’re done for the day. Thank you again.” Danielle reached for the cell phone and tapped in her code.

Alex got to his feet. He picked up a nearby towel and wiped his face before going to his wallet.

It sat atop his neatly folded clothing on a chair in a corner of the bedroom. He took the extra time to wrestle himself into his underwear as Danielle tucked her equipment into a bright pink backpack.

She smiled as he offered his credit card, shirtless and only wearing his jeans. “Thank you.”

It only took a minute for her to finish the transaction and hand his card back.

Alex jammed his wallet into a back pocket.

She cocked her head, the long blonde curls dancing around her face.

“Are you okay?” There was true concern in her voice.

“I’m fine.” Alex put the damp towel around his neck. “Why?”

“You look,” she paused, “unhappy. Is there something wrong?” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “Didn’t you enjoy yourself?”

Alex felt bad. He didn’t want to tell her the truth, because there was nothing she could do about it.

You’re not Kate.

“Yes, thank you. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.” Alex shrugged. “You know how it is. Hard to relax when you’ve got heavy stuff going on.”

He held back from saying something as trite as
it’s not you, it’s me
.

Even if it was true.

“I understand,” she murmured. “I hope the next visit will be more helpful in alleviating your stress.”

Alex gave her a warm smile.

Don’t shoot the messenger.

“Thank you again. I appreciate you stepping in for Kate.”

“No problem at all. I hope she’ll be well soon.” She nodded and picked up her backpack.

Alex escorted her out and went to the window to watch the car back down the driveway.

She was nice.

She was good. His skin tingled with the memory of the flogger, the carefully administered whipping pushing him right to the edge.

Then…nothing.

He was turned on, his cock rubbing against the sheets, begging for release.

But it didn’t feel the same. The only thing that came close to explaining it was having a cheat code for a game that allowed you to pick up all the prizes without doing the work.

Or plundering a bottomless chest without having to work for the rewards.

All he knew was that he couldn’t get there with Danielle.

She was a lot of things. A lovely lady, a fantastic Domme.

But she wasn’t Kate.

My Kate.

Alex picked up the phone and called Hooded Pleasures. While it rang, he wondered if they had people on the switchboard around the clock, ministering to the last-minute emergencies and calls for help from customers and clients.

“Yes, Alex?”

They also had caller ID, it seemed.

“I’d like to add a tip to Danielle’s account. I didn’t think about it until she left.” It was a weak excuse to call them but he was sure she’d heard worse.

“Of course. I’m sending you an email right now. Thank you for your generosity.”

“Thank you for your help,” Alex said. “I was also wondering when Kate was going to be available again.”

“Please hold, and I’ll check.” The canned music started up.

He contemplated putting the phone down, walking away from it.

From all of it.

He couldn’t. He had to find out what was going on with Kate.

The retro remix disappeared with a click.

“Mr. Hanson?” The woman’s tone had changed, signaling trouble with his request.

I asked the wrong question.

“Regarding Kate—she’s still a little under the weather and not available. You understand, I’m sure.”

A flash of anger shot across Alex’s mind, hard enough for him to bite his tongue, holding back a curse.

There was no point in getting upset with the woman at the other end of the phone.

She was saying what she’d been told to say.

A hollow ache started in his gut, washing away the calmness Danielle had created.

“Please tell her I hope she’s better soon. I—” He bit down on his lower lip. “Tell her I need to see her again.”

“I’ll pass it on to her. Thank you again.” The line went dead.