Stricken Trust (Stricken Rock) (7 page)

“You two need to make sure mommy stops being a pain. She thinks she’s superwoman all the time. Tell her that Papa Bear is just doing his job to help take care of her,” he whispers to them then looks up into my eyes and locks them there. “Mama needs to let Papa Bear do his job and not only protect her but her cubs.” His eyes are boring into mine with passion and love. “This bodyguard loves his family. And he will protect them always. Including from Mama Bear when she’s being a pain, thinking she can do things that are no longer safe.”

I can’t believe James is speaking to me like this. He’s Papa Bear? As in my papa? Or a surrogate dad to the twins? I like the sound of it. It fits him well. Damn, it’s confusing but he’s so handsome and his eyes are so beautiful. I can’t believe I’ve ever gotten this lucky to have such an amazing man in my life. James is my protector. Hired or not. He goes above and beyond the call of duty for us three and for that, I will always love him.

My heart is thumping in my chest. I take in a long deep breath. My face is flush.

“Does Mama Bear understand?” he asks me.

I nod.

“Mama Bear needs to tell me,” he gently says, his voice sensuously low.

My skin is on fire right now. I think he just woke up the whore. That kind of talk makes my pussy wet. Fuck! I hate this.

“I understand Papa Bear. I will be good. I won’t carry luggage. Or heavy things upstairs. I will try. I’m sorry,” I whisper in a pout. He reaches up and fingers my bottom lip.

Damn! The contact of his skin on mine sparks and my core is pulsating. He holds is finger there. I close my eyes and savor his warmth on my lip. I know it’s not his mouth. But it’s soothing and sexy all at the same time.

He’s my bodyguard, he’s my bodyguard. Stop Em. Stop. I repeat. My chest heaving deep breaths through my nose.

He releases me from his hold and bends his face down and kisses my belly two times each side. Then he leaves and goes upstairs. I look over to Stacy; his eyes are wide.

“Whoa!” He exclaims fanning his face with his hand. “That was hot.”

“No…no, it wasn’t,” I correct with a near snarl.

“Oh, yes it was. I felt the temperature rise like ten degrees up in here. Holy shit Em. You have a thing for your bodyguard don’t you?”

I crinkle my brow and purse my lips. “No, I do not.”

“Then it’s something. But it’s hot as hell in here. Woo-wee. Passion is flying high.” He fans his face again with gusto, smiling naughtily ear to ear.

I giggle. “You’re crazy, Stace. It’s probably that hot and horny cock between your legs.”

“Yep, my cock is hot and horny. So, can we go for a walk? It’s beautiful outside. I think James would be okay with that. Oh, what’s he calling himself these days? Papa Bear? Ok, well I think that should be on his approved list of activities.”

“Yeah I’ll throw on a coat and some leggings and we can head out.” I say, getting up off the couch. “I’ll meet you down by the door in a minute.”

I hit the stairs and take them carefully up. I want to abide by James’s rules. I open our bedroom door. Shit! He’s standing in the middle of our bedroom floor wrapped only in a towel. His hair damp from a shower. And his chest is glistening with little beads of water drops. I wonder what they taste like off his skin? Oh, shit! No… no… I don’t. I don’t care. I shake my head.

“Sorry. I am putting on a coat and a pair of leggings. Stacy and I are going for a walk outside. Is that alright?”

“Yes, that’s fine. Put on some cloth mittens too. It’s a little chilly out.”

Why does it matter if I wear that or not? I don’t get it. He runs outside in shorts and a tank and I have to wear a fucking parka and a set of gloves. This is stupid. I’m not five anymore.

“Why is it you get to help take care of me? Then I want to go for a walk and you tell me I can go but I have to wear mittens. Yet, you’re allowed to wear practically nothing outside. It’s not fair. I get that you don’t want me lifting a lot of stuff. But damn James. You might be old enough to be my dad but you’re not my dad, you’re my bodyguard. Remember? ” I blurt, frustrated. Oh, shit I probably should have been nicer. That didn’t come out as sweet as I wanted.

He doesn’t say a word and he takes a step closer. Oh fuck! He’s in a towel. I am keenly aware that he is too close and too naked. This is not good. Don’t come any closer, James. Just keep the ten feet away that’s a safe distance. My pussy won’t thump harder.

He takes another step.

“James please stop coming closer,” I plead and my voice cracks. Shit, real smooth Em. “You’re not wearing any clothes. Get dressed and then you can say whatever it is you want.”

He takes another step. Damn he’s fine. Fuck! No. He’s not. He’s your bodyguard, Em. Just a man who protects you. Not a hot man with a gorgeous cock. Oh fuck stop thinking about his cock.

I swallow hard.

“I’m coming to my pregnant woman,” He says in a low tone, that sets off a wave of goose bumps over my entire body and I shiver.

“Why?” I gulp.

He takes a few long strides and he’s right in front of me. I can feel his heat. Oh shit! My pussy. Oh god. Shut up, you horny bitch. She’s screaming now. Damn-it! She’s begging and pleading me for a release. I hate myself. I hate myself so much right now. This is the worst time ever.

He places hands on either side of the door, leaning into me.

“Look at me, Em,” he coaxes lovingly.

I stare up into his beautiful green brown eyes. And slide down the door onto the ground. I can’t take this. I want to touch his skin and lick it and suck his cock. I don’t care if he’s my bodyguard or forty three. This isn’t good. I close my eyes and try to forget about who’s in front of me. Everything was fine until we came here. I slept in bed with him, we cuddled, and we had so much fun together. I’ve always found him attractive. But then I have to go and walk in on seeing him naked. Ruining our friendship forever. That cock of his ruined it. I ruined it. Fuck, I’m going to cry. Damn me! Damn this all. Stupid hormones.

He crouches down. I can’t look at him. He’s too beautiful. Johnathan is sexy and beautiful too but totally different. James is gentle and kind and sweet. He’s warms you from the inside out and makes you want to love him and feel him down inside of his soul. It’s slow and romantic, kind of like our cuddling. Johnathan exudes passion and raw animalism. Which is better? I have no idea. But I love them both. Damn, this is wrong! I shouldn’t like him. Or either of them.

“Emily, are you okay?” he asks in a murmur. I can feel him in front of me. Not touching me but so close I can feel his warmth and soothing nature.

“I’m confused.” I slouch with a frown.

“Talk to me.” He touches my leg. Oh, the warmth of his touch. It’s seeping into my bones and encapsulating me.

I sigh.

“I can’t,” I mope

“Is this because of what happened two days ago? When you saw what you saw?”

“Yes, but it’s not about it being ugly if that’s what your hinting to. It’s because I liked how you looked before and now that I’ve seen the rest of you, I like it more. I don’t think it would affect me so much if I wasn’t so turned on all the time. But I’m very attracted to you,” I mutter reluctantly.

“Do you think if you had someone to help with the sexual frustration like Claire did, it would help?”

I shrug saddened. “I dunno.”

“I can help you, Emily,” he offers kindly.

“NO!” I screech. My head shooting up and staring him right in the eyes. I’m astounded. He shouldn’t be offering me this. Never. It’s not right.

“Why not?” his face is unreadable.

“You don’t like me that way, for one. I can’t use you, for two. And I don’t want to ruin our friendship, for three.” I blurt out fast.

“I do too find you attractive. So yes I like you that way. You’re not using me if I offer. I know you’d never ask. And it can’t hurt our friendship. It’s me helping you. Not the other way around.”

He cannot be serious about this. That sounds ridiculous. If he gets nothing in return that is by definition using someone. Duh!

“What if I want to have sex?”

“I can try. I’ll do whatever you want. I can give you oral. Although I’ve not done it in years. I can touch you inside if you want. I can do what Claire did, if you miss it that much. If it’s going to help you and keep you happy, that’s all I want.”

“Why?” I ask blankly. I’m confused. This is the last thing I ever thought James would offer in a million years.

“You are in need. I want to service you. It’s simple, really. We can keep it a secret. As long as you don’t tell Stacy or anyone, including Johnathan or Claire. It can be just us and everyone already knows we share a bed. I guess it’s my way of saying thank you for accepting me for who I am. No one has ever done that.”

I snatch up his face in my hands.

“James. I love you. So very much. I can’t use you. If you want to do this because you want to, we can try it. But, you’ve heard me and seen how I get when I’m high on hormones. I can’t promise I won’t ask for this a lot. If you start this, I am going to want it a lot. Just like I use B.O.B or my hand. Anytime you want to be done, you tell me. I can’t run the show. You can. And I know you haven’t touched a woman in five years. So it’s going to be different,” I explain.

“I know. But I’ve been wanting to ask to help for months. And I know your need is getting worse. I hear the orgasms. I was afraid if you saw my manhood that you’d be scared of me. But now that you are okay with him, I am happy to offer.” He smiles and I pull his mouth down to mine and give him a quick peck on the lips.

“Okay, Papa Bear. But remember, you can stop whenever it gets uncomfortable.”

“Yes, Mama Bear. Do you want help now?” he looks down at my open dress.

I shake my head. “No I am going to go out with Stacy. Maybe tonight.”

He stands and I can see a huge boner tenting his towel. I guess he’s more excited about this than I expected.

He drops it down. Oh damn! Look at that hotness! Hell yes!

I have got to go.

I quickly grab a pair of leggings out, my red mittens and coat that no longer buttons in the front.

“Bye my bear. I’ll be back in a while,” I wave when I exit.

“Bye, Em,” he calls back.

“So how’s the Kyle thing going?” I ask Stacy. We are finally out into the woods at the back of our cabins property. It’s brisk out but tolerable. I’m glad I put on the mittens that James requested because they are definitely keeping my hands toasty warm. The trees here are tall and mostly bare. Except for a bunch of evergreens that line this well-worn trail.

“Honestly, Em. He’s amazing. I can’t believe we are together. It’s all thanks to you,” he says and gives my arm a squeeze.

The ground under my feet is hard and makes for easy walking. It’s rare that I get to spend a few hours alone with my best friend in a place so serene.

“It’s not me. It’s your bond. You two are meant for each other. I knew it after you told me about him months ago in Indiana. You also make an adorable couple. I wish I was as lucky in love as you two.”

“I know babe. Claire is fun and I know you love her. But I don’t think it’s love, love. And even if Johnathan is love, love, he’s still not worthy of you. I’m sorry. After the Ashley thing and the plane debacle
, it’s
hard for me to be friendly with him as much.”

“Mine and Johnathan’s love relationship or lack thereof has nothing to do with your friendship with him. You two are friends and should be. Don’t let his and my shit get in the way. He did text me the other night asking me to fuck him. He was drunk. It was funny. But I’m sure it will be fine. I’m going to be okay. If I am alone, I’m alone. I have you and James and the babies. That’s all that matters.” I reassure him and tuck my hair out of my face. My nose is ice cold.

“You have Kyle too. We’ll be your family. So will Claire when she gets back.”

I nod.

“Claire is lovely. But if I don’t sleep with her and actually find someone to love other than her
,
I don’t think she’ll stick around. I don’t want to talk about this anymore. This is a relaxing vacation. Minus the super horny part. But it’s all good
,
” I state.

He snatches my mitten covered hand into his bare one and we walk together. I love this! I miss Stacy.

“Okay
,
love. I won’t talk about it. How about I give you a rundown of my sex life? That would be exciting,” he chuckles wickedly.

“Anything is better than talking about my lack of love life. So sure.”

He stops me and stares into my eyes. “Holy crap Em, are you still the same woman I know? You want to actually hear about it?” His eyes widen with amazement.

I shrug. “Yes, I guess I do. If you want to share.”

We turn and continue walking. “Well, I guess things have been hot and heavy. I’m done with women. And I’m very sorry for ever trying to convince you to love me in a romantic way. You were so right about Kyle being who I need to be with. The sex is amazing and I’ve forgotten how much I love to suck cock until we reunited. It’s mind-blowing. He’s the best lover. I really wish you could have someone as tender as Kyle that is also a freak when needed. It’s hard to get both,” he says.