Steven Gerrard: My Liverpool Story (12 page)

First Taste of Rafa’s Talents

Our visit to the Mestella in September 2002 resulted in a performance I would get to know very well. Valencia were coached by Rafa Benitez and the way his team took us apart planted a seed with the Anfield hierarchy. Valencia were hard to beat, they pressed the ball well and had good players in the final third. It was the blueprint Rafa used when he eventually came to Liverpool. We were suffocated in this game, losing 2–0 to goals that were world class.

Adding to the Tally

When you smack a ball as hard as you can, it naturally brings both feet off the ground. I have never set myself a goal-scoring target. When I first broke into the team, I think if you got double figures from midfield that was seen as being really good. But now the bar has been raised by players such as Frank Lampard and Paul Scholes, 15 is almost seen as the norm.

The Sweetest Thing

There aren’t many better feelings than scoring against Manchester United, especially in a major final. It is important to take the chance to win silverware because it doesn’t come round too often and when we played United in the Worthington Cup Final in 2003, I knew we had to seize the moment.

I only ever fear losing to Everton and United because I am a fan and I know how much it hurts, so to win 2–0 was a relief as much as anything. My goal had a bit of luck to it, taking a deflection off David Beckham and looping into the top corner. But I’ll settle for that. My celebration was instinctive. Just the perfect day.

It Means So Much

Days like this are everything I dreamed of as a kid: winning silverware, scoring a goal and celebrating with my mates. Michael added another late on to seal the win and we had a good celebration afterwards. At that time under Gerard Houllier, Liverpool had the Indian sign over United. We used to play a diamond formation in midfield, with a holding player for security and then we would end up out-numbering them in the middle. On a big pitch like at Cardiff or at Old Trafford, having more bodies in the middle helped.

FAREWELL HOULLIER

There have been plenty of occasions in my career
when I have been asked for my opinion on a manager’s situation. What’s going on? Can we turn it round? Has he lost the dressing room? I have been asked those questions by fans and I have been asked those questions by people at Liverpool.

But I can honestly say, on my kids’ lives, that I have always backed every manager I have worked under. Yes, there have been occasions when I have been frustrated with how things are going and when I have been quizzed about things I could have said: ‘This is rubbish. We hate the manager. We want out. The club’s going nowhere.’ Instead, I have said we can turn it round and I believe I can help whoever is in charge.

I am all for fighting for a manager rather than sticking the knife in and pushing him closer to the sack. So the whispers and the rumours that become fact, especially in a city like Liverpool, that the senior players were behind Gerard Houllier leaving in the summer of 2004 – forget it.

I heard that I was consulted and I had a say in his departure. Not at all. I have gone out of my way on countless occasions to back managers not just through my performances, but in what I say. When results don’t go well at a big club like Liverpool everyone sees what is around the corner. As players we have targets, but also the fans and the club have aims and aspirations as well. When you fail to reach them, change becomes inevitable.

There has been a pattern at Liverpool, going back to when I was going to the games as a fan, whereby managers have left.

Ultimately, it is the manager whose job comes under threat because Liverpool’s history demands that the team competes at the very top. It is difficult and sad to see anyone in any walk of life lose their job, but when it is someone you have built up a very strong relationship with over the years, someone who has gone out of their way to be supportive of you, it hurts even more.

The harsh reality of football is magnified as well when you are young. Nowadays I am more thick-skinned. I have come to realise that football is a business and that managers come and go in every league in the world. However, when Gerard left there was a huge sense of sadness.

Liverpool finished fourth in the 2003–04 season, which ironically would be considered as a success today, but back then it wasn’t viewed as enough. The Premier League has grown stronger and stronger and that season was the first in which the landscape changed.

Roman Abramovich had just bought Chelsea, which was to prove fantastic for them, but a major set-back for everyone else. No one knew that much about Abramovich to begin with, but as the days and weeks went by you started to realise that big changes were taking place within English football.

Money has always talked, but now the sort of sums that were being spent were mind-boggling. Signings were arriving at Stamford Bridge left, right and centre and I realised that while Abramovich was around it was going to take time and be a massive challenge for Liverpool to win the league again.

It didn’t seem impossible, but Chelsea immediately established themselves at a level that we were still striving to reach. Overnight they became genuine contenders. I knew they weren’t going to go away.

In those circumstances, every pound and penny that Liverpool spent had to be spot on. Yet whereas other teams made signings and improved their squad, becoming stronger, I feel now that we went a bit flat. The margins are fine. If you don’t strengthen in the summer correctly, you will find other sides pulling away from you. The sides with the most financial power usually get their signings right because they have first pick of the best players available. Everyone else comes in behind them because they don’t want to get involved in a head-to-head battle for players that they cannot realistically win. You get judged on your signings and while it wasn’t solely down to Diouf, Diao and Cheyrou that we didn’t progress as we wanted, Gerard paid the price.

Yet that final step in football is the hardest. And it is getting even harder to take now. I was gearing up for Euro 2004 with England when the decision was taken by Liverpool’s board of directors that Gerard would be leaving.

I know the chairman David Moores and Rick Parry the chief executive were sad, even though they were making a decision they felt was in the best interests of the club, and I felt the same way.

From the moment I broke into Liverpool’s first team, Gerard spoke to me every day. The conversation I had with him for the first time after it was announced he had left was difficult and awkward. I had shared everything with him and yet now I didn’t really know what to say except ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’.

Typically, Gerard was more interested in me than in himself. ‘Keep going, keep learning’ was the gist of what he said to me when really I should have been the one offering him kind words. But that is Gerard Houllier for you. Before every big game, a text message will come through from him wishing me good luck. If Liverpool – or England – have a big result, he will be in contact offering his congratulations. He is always in touch to see how my family is and vice versa. I keep in contact with him as well. Just because he left Liverpool did not mean our relationship ended. In many ways, the texts and conversations I have with him now mean more than ever.