Stepbrother Catfish: The Complete Series (3 page)

AJ
: Hey, I’m sorry about yesterday but I can explain. Please don’t hate me.

The phone shakes in my hand. No, wait, it’s my hand that is doing the shaking.

He’s sorry? He can explain? All the emotions I filed away while I was working come bubbling back to the surface. Confusion, anger, and the worst of them all, hope. I try to squash that hope. I need to stomp it out permanently, but it’s clingy, it won’t go away. Hope right now is my biggest enemy.

I just spent my day feeling depressed and stupid. Why do I want to text him back right away, hoping it had all been one great big misunderstanding?

I guess I rather believe I’m not stupid, that all that invested time and emotion was not for nothing. I know I’m acting a fool. I’m becoming living proof of that saying: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

I just can’t help myself, I’m too damn weak. I shoot him a text back.

Me
: I’m leaving work. Let me have it.

AJ
: Call me.

I rushed home to call him. I wasn’t even aware of what I was doing. It was all muscle memory.

Now that I can call him, I’m afraid. I have to do it, though, I have to know. If I don’t like the answer maybe the why of it can give me closure.

I close my eyes. From the way I’m feeling, the way I’m breathing, the way I’m acting, you’d think I was getting ready to dive off a building or something. My finger makes the push. My phone is ringing.

His husky voice greets me, “Hello, beautiful.”

Just like that AJ makes me weak. He has that kind of power over me.

“Hello,” I exhale.

There is a long minute of silence. I walk over to my couch and sit down. I pull my knees up to me chest and hug them.

I think he’s waiting for me to say something else. I’m not going to make this easy on him. The silence continues. I hear him breathing. In my apartment, the only sound is my refrigerator humming.

Finally he says, “Hailey, I’m very sorry.”

It hurts. The betrayal, being stood up, acknowledging it.

“Why?”

Why did you stand me up? Why did you betray me? Why did you make me have feelings?

“I freaked out.”

“You freaked out?” I’m incredulous.

There’s another moment of silence.

“Yes.” He takes a deep breath. So far he sounds sincere. Then he says, “I was afraid you wouldn’t like me.”

“Seriously?”

How could I not like him? He’s beautiful. He’s perfect. He has everything going for him. I was afraid he wouldn’t like me. I’m not the prettiest or the skinniest. I was the one who was freaked out, but I still showed up.

“I waited for two hours.”

It was humiliating. The look of pity in the waitress’ eyes when she had to ask me to leave…

“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted.”

Well, that took the breath right out of me.

“You are the woman of my dreams. My ultimate fantasy.” His voice grows deeper, huskier as he continues. It does funny, flippy things to my tummy. “I have never wanted someone, anyone the way I want you. It scares the shit out of me.”

I was so not expecting that. I don’t know what to say. I try to find words to speak. Words fail me.

He goes on, “Hailey, one more chance.  I was a dick. I stood you up and you don’t deserve that. I want to punch myself in the face for doing it. I’m begging you, please.”

“You don’t have to beg,” I say softly.

Maybe I’m a sucker but right now I’d bet my life he’s being honest with me.

I could relate. I had been freaked out about meeting him. Freaked out about him being too good to be true. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted. I want him so bad it’s no longer a want, it’s becoming a need.

I can understand being scared shitless about all of it. I can forgive him, this once.

“God, I love you,” he says, sounding relieved. “Where are you?”

“Home, on my couch,” I answer without giving it much thought.

“Can I come over?”

“What? Now?”

“Yes, to make it up to you.”

“How are you going to make it up to me?”

He chuckles again. I don’t know what it is about that deep laugh but I’m quivering in places I don’t normally quiver.

“How do you want me to make it up to you?”

I laugh nervously. Whoa. I know what he’s implying, but I’m not that great at flirting. I haven’t had much practice.

He gets the hint, I think and backs off. There’s another moment of silence. It feels so good to talk to him again. To feel as if I’m not alone in the world. Someone cares about me.

“I want to see you.”

“When?” I ask nervously, hoping he’s changed his mind and doesn’t mean immediately.

“Now. I feel like a fool. I need to see you, to have you in my arms…”

I can’t do it. I just can’t. I don’t want to meet him looking like this. I need a shower, a few hours of sleep, and a thick coat or two of makeup. I’m a mess and so not a hot one.

I want him, desperately. It almost kills me to turn him away, but I can’t risk frightening him off. I can’t risk losing him again.

“I can’t…”

I can almost feel his disappointment as he sighs. Instantly I feel guilty.

“Tomorrow?” he asks, hopeful.

I respond with an enthusiastic, “Yes.”

He chuckles. The deep rumble has my heart skipping a beat.

“How about my place?”

I enthusiastically respond again without really thinking, “Yes.”

Maybe that was a mistake. I would prefer to meet in public then maybe head back to his place for coffee. But what if I offend him by asking for somewhere else?

“I’ll text you my address.”

“Okay.”

My phone vibrates. I pull it away from my ear and sure enough he’s sent me his address. Wow, he lives in the nice part of town. I’m not sure the bus even runs there.

“How about 5:30. And if you’re late, I won’t hold it against you?”

Am I dreaming? Did I fall asleep on the bus? I punch myself, it hurts. Yep, I’m definitely awake.

“Sounds good.”

If he stands me up this time, well, now I’ll know where he lives. I’ll send him a letter full of glitter in vengeance. The small kind of glitter that sticks around for years, the kind you find stuck in your creases months later.

“You sound tired. Get some sleep. You’re going to need your energy tomorrow.”

He chuckles again. Just the implication that he hints at gives me a surge of nervous energy.

I’m exhausted, but I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep. I’m going to toss all night thinking about him.

I need to start getting ready, though, immediately. There are places to shave and nails to be done. If I start now, I just might be ready in time for our date.

“Good night, beautiful, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Good night, AJ. Sweet dreams.”

My alarm goes off an hour early. I’m drooling, my pillow is soaked. Yuck. I must have slept deeply.

Wiping the slobber off my face, I sit up in bed. Today is another new day. Anything can happen. Bring it.

I reach over to my nightstand and unplug my phone. It’s fully charged and there’s a text from AJ.

AJ
: Good morning, beautiful.

He sends me that text every day. It’s exhilarating to know I’m the first thing he thinks of every morning. He’s the first thing I think of. I text him back.

Me
: Good morning.

A couple of seconds later my phone dings and vibrates.

AJ
: I’m looking forward to tonight.

Me
: Me too.

That’s an understatement.

AJ
: Have a good day.

Me
: Ditto.

I send him a kissy face.

Time is wasting. Last night, I passed out after plucking and shaving. Today, I’ll need every minute I have to shower and to do my hair and makeup. I jump out of bed and run to the bathroom to get started.

I make my coffee to go and drink it on the bus ride to work. I feel my cheeks starting to tire. I can’t stop smiling.

I’m floating on cloud nine at work as I go about my filing. I have to keep myself from humming and disturbing the office.

Andrew isn’t even at work today. He’s been missing all morning. I don’t have to worry about him messing with me before I leave. My day keeps getting better and better.

After lunch, the nerves start to set in. As the hour grows later and later, and meeting AJ comes closer and closer, I’m plagued with anxiety. The stakes feel even higher this time around.

I’m meeting him at his place. He told me twice that he loves me. What if he doesn’t like my face? What if we have absolutely no chemistry?

He knows almost everything about me. My hopes, my dreams, and all my fears. You can’t force attraction. He could still find me repulsive.

The second half of my day drags on a lot longer than the first half. The bounce is gone from my step. I’m no longer floating around as if I’m some beautiful, cheerful princess humming to the birds in an enchanted forest. Now I’m just trying to hold it together, trying not to give myself a heart attack. If only chill pills really did exist, I’d take one.

I leave work without a hitch. Looks like this time I’m going to be on time. AJ’s place is on the other side of town. I hail a cab. If I took the bus, I’d have to switch more than two times just to get there.

Peering out the cab window, I watch the city change the closer we get to AJ’s part of town. It’s as if we cross some magic invisible line, on one side it’s clean and well kept. The other side is left to deteriorate and languish.

The dirty and cracked gum covered sidewalks transform into tidy, tree-lined streets. Corner convenience stores become high-end boutiques with large glass windows showing off the trendiest styles. Hot dog stands are replaced by fancy bistros with patio seating and snotty waiters. The cars parked on the street start to cost more than I make in a year.

Even the people walking are different. Sneakers and jeans give way to heels and designer dresses. Everyone has a phone and everyone is talking on it or looking at it.

I don’t belong here. What was I thinking?

The cab comes to a stop. It would be so easy to tell the driver I’ve changed my mind and to give him the address to my apartment. It would be so easy to tuck my tail and run, to stand up AJ and give him a taste of his own medicine.

I hand the driver enough cash to cover the fare and a small tip. I step out of the cab, it takes off as soon as I close the door behind me. Now there’s no going back.

I turn to look at AJ’s building. I have to tip my head all the way back to glimpse the top. Pulling out my phone, I double check the address. Yep, this is it. He lives in the penthouse. It’s going to be a long elevator ride up.

With my heart in my throat, I approach the building. A doorman greets me, holding the door open for me. I feel underdressed as I enter the building. I’m in my jacket and black dress. I’m just a lowly file clerk. The guy who just held the door for me probably makes in a day what I earn in a week.

There’s a security desk, but I must be expected. I wonder if the guard’s note says to look out for the poor girl, the one who doesn’t belong. Send her right up. The guard waves me on towards the elevator.

I walk up to the elevator and push the button for up. It’s starting to feel surreal. The doors open right away. It’s as if destiny is doing everything in its power to propel me forward. I step in. The button for the penthouse sits above the rest. I push it.

I knew AJ was well off but this…

What’s a guy like him doing on online dating sites? Especially ones that are free. What’s a guy like him wanting to do anything with a girl like me?

The elevator ride isn’t long enough. I’m not ready yet, I’m so not ready.

I step out when the doors slide open. Now I’m in a tiny hallway. There’s a security door in front of me. It’s unlocked and open a crack. I’m unsure of how to proceed.

“AJ?” I call out.

I can’t see anything through the crack only darkness. There’s no answer. Maybe that’s just another hallway.

I push open the door a bit more but beyond is only more darkness. The elevator dings behind me, it’s leaving.

“AJ?” I call out again.

First, I check my phone for any messages. There are none. Then I shoot AJ a quick text.

Me
: Do you hear me?

I hear a phone ding. Is it his? That’s really weird. It came from somewhere in the darkness.

I send another text to see what happens.

Me
: I think I’m lost?

A phone dings again. It must be his.

“If you’re trying to freak me out, you’re doing a very good job,” I say.

None of this makes any sense. Did he lure me here as a prank? Is he taking video of me or something to post for laughs on the web?

I turn, I’m done with this. I’m going to push the button for the elevator and go home.

My phone dings and vibrates. It’s a text from him.

AJ
: Come in. I have a surprise for you.

Me
: No way. This is serial killer type of stuff.

AJ
: You know I’d never hurt you. Trust your heart.

My heart can’t be trusted, but I guess if AJ really wanted to hurt me, he could come out and grab me before the elevator makes it back up.

Dammit. Here goes nothing. YOLO