Stella Makes Good (19 page)

‘I wish we were meeting under better circumstances,’ he said. ‘Stella, I’m so sorry. How are you bearing—’

‘Ahem, Doctor? I’m Steve Foster, Jesse’s husband.’

‘Yes, I know who you are,’ said Mike calmly.

Steve seemed taken aback. ‘Can I see my wife?’

‘I’m afraid Jesse’s had a severe head trauma,’ Mike started. ‘It appears—’

Both Carly and I gasped. My whole body was shaking.

‘Is she alive?’ Steve jumped in.

‘Yes, Jesse’s alive,’ Mike said. ‘But you can’t see her. She’s being examined for injuries.’

‘But Mike,’ I said, my voice rising, ‘she’s okay, isn’t she?’

Steve looked at me. ‘How do you know his name?’

‘Doctor Mike Thompson,’ said Mike, not missing a beat as he stuck out his hand to shake Steve’s. ‘I have some papers for you to sign, Mr Foster. This way, if you will.’

He led Steve out of the waiting room and down the corridor.

Carly and I had been sitting there for what seemed like hours when Terry showed up.

‘How is she?’ he asked after hugging us both.

‘We don’t know,’ I said, shaking my head.

‘What happened?’ He wrapped his arms around me in a gesture of comfort.

Briefly, I thought about the oddness of Terry and Mike both being here, but I was too worried to care about social niceties.

‘It all happened so quickly,’ I sobbed. ‘Jesse ran out of the library crying, I confronted Liz—’

‘Why was she crying?’ Carly asked.

‘Liz retrenched her. Claimed Jesse’s quirks had become too much of a distraction for her to continue working properly.’

‘Poor Jesse,’ said Carly. ‘She would have been devastated.’

I nodded. ‘After my argument with Liz, I quit—’

‘You what?’ said Terry. ‘It must have been quite a disagreement.’

‘I got in the car and headed home. I’d only been driving a couple of minutes before I came across the accident.’

‘Jesus!’ said Terry. ‘How did it happen?’

‘I’m not sure,’ I stammered. ‘A witness says she deliberately accelerated into a tree, but Jesse would never do anything so reckless. She loves her kids.’

Terry shook his head. ‘Nightmare.’

‘A nightmare we’re having to live through.’ Steve was back again.

‘Steve, mate,’ said Terry, ‘I’m so sorry about this. But Jesse’s one strong woman. She’ll pull through, you’ll see.’

‘I wish I had your blind confidence,’ Steve said dismissively.

‘Do you want me to call Jesse’s parents?’ I asked him.

‘I’ve already rung them,’ he said.

It felt like I’d been at the hospital forever but only fifty-five minutes had lapsed. At this stage, we couldn’t do more than wait. I phoned Hannah and Ben to fill them in on the situation, and asked Steve if he wanted me to ask a friend to pick up Ollie and Emily from school.

He declined, telling me, ‘It’s all under control.’

A little while later, Toby walked into the room. Both Carly and I swooped down on him.

‘How is she?’ I asked.

‘Early days,’ he replied, then saw Steve and went over to him. ‘Mr Foster?’

Steve jumped slightly. ‘Do I know you?’

‘I don’t think so. My name’s Toby Mitchell. Together with Doctor Thompson, I’m attending to your wife.’

‘What are you doing here then?’

‘Keeping you up-to-date and informed,’ Toby said calmly. ‘At the moment, Jesse’s undergoing a series of X-rays to assess for fractures of the skull and spinal instability.’

‘Oh God,’ Carly said, clutching at my shoulder.

‘Her brain has sustained significant swelling and bruising due to the trauma of the accident.’

Steve considered Toby’s words for a moment. ‘Right. So, when will she be better?’

‘I’m afraid that’s like asking how long a piece of string is. The truth is, we really don’t know. As long as it takes, I’m afraid.’

‘As long as it takes? Really? That’s your professional opinion?’

Toby nodded. ‘I’ll let you know more as and when we have news.’

He pulled me aside and spoke briefly about June’s test results before disappearing through the doors to attend to Jesse. I had to hand it to Toby: he had grace under pressure. If I’d been him, I would have belted Steve.

Terry walked over to me. ‘Stella, I’m sorry about Jesse, but if there’s nothing I can do here, why don’t I go home, check on Mum, see the kids after school and organise dinner? Looks like you’re in for a long night and I think I can be more helpful doing something practical.’

I hugged him, tears rolling down my cheeks. ‘Thanks, I appreciate it.’

‘It’ll give me some time to spend with Mum alone.’

‘She doesn’t have Alzheimer’s. I know you were worried so I had Toby—’

‘The doctor here? The one from last Sunday?’

‘Yeah. I had him organise some preliminary tests and just now he spoke to me about them. He said that once people get to a certain age and start forgetting things and becoming increasingly absent-minded, their children assume they have dementia, but it’s often not the case.’

‘That’s a relief.’

‘Yeah. It’s more likely a combination of old age, grief over Jimmy—’

‘Still?’

‘Still. And stress.’

‘About?’

‘Our separation, getting older, not being able to do what she wants when she wants. The fall the other day wouldn’t have helped.’

‘I guess I should have trimmed the hedges like she asked.’

I nodded. ‘And maybe you could also take a more softly-softly approach with her regarding Amanda, too.’

Terry rolled his eyes. ‘Amanda! I need to tell her I’ll be home late.’

He kissed me, then walked over to Steve and shook his hand. Terry was a good bloke. I was so glad he was the father of my children.

Just after he’d left, Jesse’s parents arrived and made a beeline for Steve.

‘My baby,’ cried Dot. ‘Where is she? What happened? Somebody tell me what happened!’

‘Jesse’s been in a car accident,’ Steve said. ‘She’s being attended to now.’

‘Is it bad?’

‘We don’t know yet,’ he said, and for the first time since he’d walked in, I sensed a vulnerability about him. His confident veneer was slipping.

‘Dot,’ I said, walking over and hugging her. ‘I’m so sorry.’

‘Stella, what happened? Were you with her?’

I shook my head. ‘No, but I do know she’s in the best hands possible. These doctors are miracle workers. Jesse’s going to be fine.’ I was saying it for my own peace of mind as much as for Dot’s.

Jesse’s dad, Tom, had hugged Steve but hadn’t said a word. I felt incredibly sad for him as he walked towards the windows and stared down into the car park. Dot joined him and took his hand.

‘What should we do?’ Carly whispered to me. ‘I feel useless sitting here.’

I nodded. ‘Let’s wait until we hear more and then decide.’

t seemed like forever before Toby and Mike reappeared.

Mike was carrying a clipboard with several pages of notes attached. He cleared his throat. ‘Because little can be done to reverse the initial traumatic brain damage, our primary focus is on stabilising Jesse to prevent further injury.’

Brain damage? The words pulsed through my mind and I barely heard the rest of what Mike was saying.

‘We’ve been able to stabilise her and we’re now ensuring proper oxygen supply to her brain and body. We’re also maintaining sufficient and adequate blood flow while controlling her blood pressure.’

‘But how is she?’ asked Dot. ‘When can I see her?’

‘Not yet, I’m afraid,’ Mike replied. ‘We’ve done X-rays and a CT scan to assess damage to the brain. What we do know is that Jesse has suffered a severe blunt head trauma, but the good news is that, despite swelling and bruising of the brain, we’ve ruled out any other mass lesion or compression of the brain stem.’ He paused. ‘However, Jesse is unconscious and has broken her right foot. She’s being prepped for surgery now.’

‘Unconscious?’ said Steve, speaking for the first time. ‘But that means she’s in a coma?’

Mike nodded. ‘That’s correct. I’m sorry I don’t have better news for you.’

Carly and I turned to each other, unable to speak.

Tom stepped forward. ‘Tom Buckland, Jesse’s father. When do you think you’ll have a prognosis?’ he asked in a choked voice.

‘It’s hard to tell,’ Mike replied. ‘But we’re doing everything we can to make sure she’s comfortable. We’ll be giving her medications like steroids for swelling as well as anti-epileptic drugs in case of seizures. In the meantime, we have to wait until the brain recovers from the initial trauma.’

‘Jesse fainted the other day,’ Dot blurted out. ‘Could that have had anything to do with the accident? Did she black out? I told her she needed to slow down, that she was taking on too much stress and wasn’t taking care of herself or her family. But she doesn’t listen to me. No one listens to me.’

Tom rubbed her arm tenderly.

‘It’s true,’ she continued, shaking him off. ‘She didn’t listen to me. I knew something like this would happen. It was a matter of time.’

‘Do you have anything you can give her?’ Steve asked, clearly agitated by Dot’s ramblings.

Everyone turned to look at him.

‘Well?’ he said impatiently, staring at Toby and Mike. ‘Do you?’

What was he suggesting? A quick shot to the temples?

Tom took Dot to sit down nearby, but she continued babbling at a hundred miles an hour. Everyone had different coping mechanisms. Talking was Dot’s.

I closed my eyes briefly as I leaned against a wall for support, wishing the day would come to an end. Toby and Mike were talking in hushed tones to Steve, and Carly was pacing up and down the waiting room. I called her over to join me.

‘This is my fault,’ I said. ‘If I’d supported Jesse more at the library, none of this would have happened.’

‘That’s not true,’ said Carly, tears trickling down her cheeks. ‘It’s my fault. Me and my big mouth.’

I shook my head. ‘It’s not you. I should have helped her more at work. I knew Liz was angling to sack her.’

We took seats at a table and stared over at Steve and the doctors.

‘How do you think he is?’ Carly asked.

I shrugged. Who knew with Steve?

A few minutes later, Brett arrived. He came straight over to Carly and hugged her tight and stroked her hair. ‘It’ll be all right,’ he soothed. For all of Carly’s complaints about Brett, he certainly seemed loving and caring towards her.

Turning to me, he said, ‘How are you holding up? Carly said you were the first on the scene.’

‘Okay,’ I whispered, then shook my head. ‘It’s like a bad dream. I keep pinching myself, hoping I’ll wake up.’

‘And Steve?’ he asked.

We turned to look at Steve again, who was now standing alone by the water dispenser. Brett walked over to him and tried to hug him. Steve resisted, then shook his head and started talking. I couldn’t hear their conversation.

Toby came back into the room. As Carly and I made our way towards him, I heard Steve say to Brett, ‘Those women.’ Brett glanced at us briefly before turning back to Steve.

‘How is she really?’ Carly was asking Toby.

‘The next twenty-four to forty-eight hours will be critical.’

‘And?’

‘And if she pulls through, we’ll hold our breath for the next day and then the one after that. I’m sorry I can’t tell you more.’

Carly sniffed back tears. ‘It’s okay. You’re doing your best.’

He put his arms around her and hugged her.

‘Hey! You guys are looking a bit too familiar,’ I said.

Carly broke free and shot a glance at Brett. He was staring straight at her. Steve looked over at us, too, and I saw his eyes widen before he let out an audible gasp. No doubt the pieces were rapidly falling into place in his mind.

‘I think he knows,’ I whispered to Carly and Toby.

Toby glanced towards Steve who was still staring straight at us. ‘You could be right. I’ll see you both soon,’ he said, and left the room.

Moments later, Brett was beside Carly. ‘Who was that guy you were all over?’

‘Pardon?’

‘It doesn’t matter. I’m just curious.’

‘He’s just a doctor, Brett. I’m upset. He was comforting me.’

Brett raised his eyebrows. ‘Okay. It’s a tough time for everyone.’

‘How’s Steve doing?’ I asked.

Brett paused. ‘Not good. Having a hard time. It’s to be expected.’

Doubly so, I thought, given that the two attending doctors had already met him under dubious circumstances.

‘Maybe if he’d treated Jesse better, none of this would have happened,’ Carly said.

‘Keep your voice down,’ Brett told her.

‘Why? It’s what everyone thinks.’

Brett glanced around the room. ‘I’m going in search of a coffee. Can I get either of you anything?’

Carly shook her head.

‘No, thanks,’ I said. ‘I should go and speak to Dot.’

Brett kissed Carly lightly on the forehead. ‘I’ll be back soon.’

I went over to Dot and Tom at their table by the window. ‘How are you?’ I asked.

‘How do you think I am?’ said Dot. ‘Distraught. I’m not even allowed to see my own daughter. It’s not right.’

‘Come on, love,’ said Tom, reaching across the table to hold her hand.

‘Is there anything I can do?’ I asked. ‘Phone Louisa for you?’

Dot wiped her eyes. ‘Tom’s already called her.’

Tom nodded. ‘She’ll be on the next flight out of San Francisco.’

‘Did I hear right?’ It was Steve. ‘Louisa’s coming here?’

‘Yes,’ said Tom, taking a deep breath. ‘Our Louisa is finally coming home.’

I glanced at Steve. The can of Coke in his hand was shaking. He seemed stricken by the news of Louisa’s return.

When I got home late Thursday night, June was sound asleep but Hannah and Ben were waiting up for me. I explained to them exactly what had happened.

‘But what’s a coma?’ Hannah asked, pale with worry.

‘It’s like a deep sleep where the person can’t be woken up and doesn’t respond normally to pain, light or sound,’ I said, having memorised Mike’s spiel. ‘When Jesse hit her head on the steering wheel, her brain had a severe traumatic injury and she went into a coma straight away.’

‘But she’ll be okay, won’t she?’ Ben said.

‘I don’t know,’ I whispered. ‘I just don’t know.’

I said goodnight to the kids and made myself a cup of peppermint tea before stretching out on the lounge. I tried closing my eyes but kept opening them to stare at a photo of Jesse, Carly and me on the side table. It had been taken at a Robbie Williams concert last year. We all looked so animated, joyful . . . alive.

After a restless night’s sleep, I spent most of Friday at the hospital. Not that I knew what to do. Mostly I just sat with Jesse when her mum, dad and Steve took a break.

In the afternoon I had a longer chat with Mike over coffee in the hospital cafeteria. He told me that although Jesse was stable, it was still touch and go.

‘It might be days, weeks, maybe even months, before she recovers,’ he said.

‘So you don’t even have an approximate time line for her improvement?’

‘I wish it was that simple,’ he replied.

‘Can’t you do something? Anything? We’re all just waiting around. Aren’t there any drugs you can give her to make her better?’

‘Stella, do you think if there was a magic bullet we wouldn’t have tried it? I’m sorry but we’re doing the best we can.’

I started tearing up. ‘Well, your best isn’t good enough.’

Mike sighed. ‘Do you know how often I hear that? For all the good we do, when a patient dies—’

‘Are you saying—’

‘No, but it always comes down to the ones who don’t make it, the ones we can’t fix.’

‘But Jesse’s my best friend.’

He held my shoulders, forcing me to look at him. I noticed the dark circles under his eyes. ‘Do you believe in prayer?’ he asked.

I shrugged him off. ‘Not really.’

‘Well, do you believe Jesse can hear when you talk to her?’

I nodded.

‘Good. Then that’s what you should do. Talk to her.’

‘I’m sorry,’ I said, wiping my eyes. ‘I know you’re doing everything you can. You must be exhausted.’

He placed his hand over mine. ‘I could say the same about you.’

It was at that moment that Steve walked up to us. ‘You two disgust me. I don’t want you seeing my wife,’ he said, glaring at me. ‘And as for you—’

Mike stood up. ‘As for me, Mr Foster,’ he said firmly, ‘I am your wife’s primary doctor and I will thank you to respect that.’

Go, Mike!

Steve looked taken aback. ‘Whatever,’ he muttered before walking away.

Mike resumed his seat. ‘That went well.’

‘He’s such a charmer.’

‘Clearly not pleased Toby and I are on the job.’

‘Yeah, he thought he’d never see you again.’

Later, I went and saw Jesse, despite Steve’s directive. Still, I was careful to keep out of his way. She didn’t look like Jesse; so many bandages and tubes. It was frightening. Her poor kids. Dot told me that when they’d eventually been allowed to see her this morning, Emily had been calm, very reserved and quiet, but Oliver had been beside himself, in floods of tears, not wanting to leave his mum’s side when visiting time was up. Heartbreaking.

As banged up as Jesse looked, now that she had made it through those crucial first twenty-four hours, I was confident she’d pull through. She had to. She was surrounded by the best medical care in the country. And as for the ridiculous talk that she’d somehow deliberately done this to herself, it was cruel. I knew Jesse well enough to know that even though Steve was a prick, she’d never leave her children voluntarily.