Stealing God (33 page)

Valerians, from foundation, valued wealth and high-birth in their men far more than brains, which may have explained why they remained untouched in their Paris lunatic asylum when the Terror of the French Republic purged priests and aristocrats alike. It may have been that Citizen Robespierre decided a few high-born but weak-headed priests who cared for a crazy-headed flock should be left in whatever peace there was to be had in an eighteenth-century Bedlam.

Over the years earnest but dim younger sons of the Catholic wealthy and well-born, first from Europe then from around the world, were pointed at Paris. It was a safe life and, in its way, a worthy one, so even as the twenty-first century dawned there were always enough Valerians to be chaplains to those exclusive and expensive European clinics where the mental illness of those who could afford the fees was better understood and treated.

Being sent to Berwick, even as an archbishop, was not considered among Valerians a plum posting but the supply never ceased. Today, as always since 1878, Catholics in and around the sleepy little town are ministered to by a Valerian father and although to the uninformed it may appear to be identical to countless other small parishes, it remains an archdiocese and its parish priest an archbishop.

The ingenious, but not untypical, Vatican solution of creating the Archdiocese of Berwick threw up one other piece of madness: Duns College in Rome. The archdiocese might have been brought into being as nothing more than a diplomatic solution to a political nuisance, but to the mind of Rome an archdiocese is an archdiocese and must be treated as such. To do otherwise would be to undermine the prestige of archbishops the world over. Berwick, in the eyes of Rome, being neither Scottish nor English, was granted its own national identity. Berwick became, technically and only to the Vatican, a papal state, the equivalent of an independent country. To the world this independence existed only as mere Vatican bureaucracy and was ignored, but to the Vatican no piece of bureaucracy can be ignored, not matter how mere. Thus it was that the papal state of Berwick, being independent, was entitled to a college in Rome and in 1898, after a decent lapse of time, Pope Leo XIII created the necessary Bull. However, the Vatican was well aware that a papal recognition of Berwick's independence, even after twenty years, might be deemed an affront to the Court of St James so the Bull was set to one side until Pope Leo died. In 1903 the Bull was enacted by Leo's successor Pope Pius X as part of ‘unfinished business' from the previous papacy and Duns College came into being, although no particular pope could be said to have actually been responsible for its creation. The name of the college was chosen because just across the border from Berwick, in Scotland, lay the little town of Duns, the birthplace of the great thirteenth-century theologian known as Duns Scotus, the Scotsman from Duns. The name having been chosen, the Vatican, careful, thorough and efficient, as always, declared the business of Berwick finished and drew a line under the whole episode to the satisfaction of all concerned.

Sir Giles Connaught summed up nicely the feelings of the British government to Lady Starcross when they met in Venice that year,

‘One may not like nor trust the Vatican, Cynthia, but thank God that unlike the Americans, they're never vulgar.'

However, as so often happens, out of evil cometh good, and the Archdiocese of Berwick and Duns College eventually evolved to serve a genuinely useful purpose.

It is not all that unusual for mature Catholic, single or widowed men, somewhat late in life, to feel they have a vocation to the priesthood. In 1852 the bishops of England and Wales created a college in Rome where they could send such men for training: the Beda, named for the Venerable Bede. However, some mature men, although feeling they had a vocation, had become used to being in charge of their own lives and baulked at the idea of becoming, as ordinary diocesan priests, completely subject to the authority of any Diocesan bishop. They required that they should be able to maintain a degree of freedom of choice over the parishes in which they would serve and, if these men were of independent means and would make no financial claim on the diocese while serving as priests, it was a requirement most Catholic bishops were ready to accept. Any man who fitted this category, on enquiring about the priesthood, was advised to make their wishes known to the Archbishop of Berwick by letter marked ‘Vocations Enquiry'. Such letters were infrequent but when they came the letter was not opened in Berwick but forwarded to Duns College where the application was considered by a minor Vatican official. If the applicant seemed suitable he would be invited, at his own expense, for initial interview. If the interview proved satisfactory the candidate was referred back to a bishop in his own national Church and allotted a placement. This placement was always of a nature to test whether the applicant could work within the Catholic community under direction.

The Church was happy to accept men who had shown in the secular world their ability to lead, but it needed to be sure they could still serve. The placement was that test. If the placement was successful then the candidate was invited back to Rome, again at his own expense, and a prolonged examination took place. There was a fee to cover the cost of the examination, a sizeable one, and it was the same for all candidates regardless of background, although latterly, for men who had lived single lives, the examination had become particularly rigorous in certain areas of their psychological makeup. Widowers found the process somewhat less intrusive. Candidates who passed the examination, before final acceptance, had to demonstrate by banker's reference that they could meet all fees and expenses during training and then support themselves in a suitable manner during their service as a priest. It was gently pointed out that the occupational pension of, say, a minor public servant, even if supplemented by a state old-age pension, would not be considered sufficient. The funds required went some way beyond such simple income. As a result all Duns College students and alumni priests were at least modestly well off, even after the Vatican had taken its share.

The Duns Method was, to some at the Vatican, the very model of how all priestly selection and formation should be carried out. What could be better than to screen candidates so thoroughly and with such great care, and have the whole cost borne by the candidate himself, even if the end result was a refusal? And the whole process brought to the Church priests who ministered to the faithful at no cost whatsoever to the diocese they served.

Alas, such vocations were all too rare, but when a suitable candidate came along he became a student for the Catholic priesthood accredited at Rome to Duns College, although all actual training was carried out by a mixture of other Roman institutions. As a matter of cold fact Duns College had, other than its title, no physical existence other than some rather Baroque headed stationery in the minor Vatican official's office drawer which he used to reply to vocations enquiries.

The college's rector, when one was needed, was temporary, honorary, unpaid, and usually unwilling, seconded from the staff of one of the real religious colleges. When a Duns College student was in training the temporary rector had the occasional use of a small office in a building immensely grand on the outside and hideously inconvenient and uncomfortable on the inside. The office, cramped and situated at the top of the building in the old servants' quarters, was used to greet the student on arrival, make him aware of domestic and academic arrangements, then meet him once a month to discuss progress or problems. When in use the office had a small sign hung on the door, Duns College Rector, there was never a name attached.

The small sign was currently hanging on the office door, announcing to anyone who passed that a Duns College student was in training in Rome. Not that anyone who passed cared one way or another …

James Green

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Published by Accent Press Ltd 2015

ISBN 9781682991374

Copyright ©
James Green
2015

First published by Luath Press 2009

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James Green
to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by the author in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

The story contained within this book is a work of fiction. Names and characters are the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

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