Starr Fated (15 page)

At least I
understood exactly what it was he wanted from his precise
instructions, and so we’d been able to achieve an incredible amount
in these few short days. The logo designs had been finalised, and
we’d made excellent progress on the Brand Guidelines to ensure
consistency for anyone using the Starr branding on any of their
products in future. I’d really enjoyed working on this project, and
I'd even go as far as to say Liam and I worked extremely well
together.

What I
wouldn’t say is that I liked the man. No, of the two brothers, I
much preferred Jamie, because he was just so much more pleasant,
easy going and laid back. I still felt rather intimated by Liam,
even though I tried my hardest not to be, and to give as good as I
got with him.

“Mmm? Oh
that’s a board of possible hairstyles I’m choosing from for my
personal image revamp. My friend Abbey is going to cut it for me,”
I explained, as I concentrated on putting the finishing touches to
an amendment that he’d asked for on one of the designs. It was
nearly the end of the week, and most of the basic groundwork was
now in place. He’d stood over me while I'd signed the contract he’d
virtually thrown at me, and I had to admit he was paying me very
generously for my work, which helped me to relax a little as it
took some of the financial pressure off. I could hopefully go back
to working some shifts at the restaurant once I’d finished at SCV,
as they were always looking for experienced staff to cover the
weekend shifts, although Paolo had been pretty miffed about me
leaving at such short notice.

“What new
image would that be?” he queried, as he frowned and closely
examined all the various short cropped pixie style haircuts Abbey
had suggested would suit me.

“My
professional businesswoman look. To help me be taken more seriously
when I go for job interviews.”

“Having your
hair cut this short would make you look like a dyke. Is that the
impression you’re trying to give?” he stated rather shockingly.

What business
was it of his what I chose to do with my hair?

“That’s a bit
harsh.” I was getting used to the way that Liam always spoke his
mind, but even so…

“I don’t mean
to offend you, Seraphina, I’m just being honest, because I don’t
believe in sugar coating the truth, as you may have gathered this
week. So be honest with me. Is that the impression you’re out to
create – that you’re a lesbian?”

“No, I just
want something radical and different. I’ve always had long hair, so
I thought it was high time I had a change.”

“Then buy a
new dress or something, but do
not
have your hair cut. Long
hair suits you,” he stated firmly, as if the matter was now
decided. “Talking of lesbians…when are you going to put my brother
out of his misery?”

“Excuse me?”
Here he was again. Just coming straight out with what he wanted to
know. I thought this was just going too far, but he carried on
determinedly.

“All these
weeks I’ve had to listen to Jamie whining on about how you’re not
sure if you’re gay or not, leading him along in the hope that he’s
finally going to get lucky at this Spring Ball you’re going to with
him. So, have you finally made up your mind? Are you gay or
not?”

The nerve of
the man!

Liam stood
back and folded his arms as he studied me.

“I really
don’t think that’s any of your business,” I informed him archly,
although annoyingly I blushed.

“I disagree.
My brother’s welfare is very much my concern. If he’s wasting his
time with you, I think it only be fair to be honest with him so he
can move on, because at the moment I'm fed up of him acting like a
love sick puppy all the time. It’s cruel to keep him dangling, and
I’d have thought it’s a simple enough call to make.”

As he stared
at me with those intense blue eyes, I supposed he had a point about
being concerned for his brother, and somehow I found myself opening
up to him.

“I have been
totally honest with Jamie, as far as I can be, and I know he’s been
incredibly patient with me. But if you want to know the honest
truth, I’m still not sure one hundred percent certain that I’m not
gay. I really like Jamie. He’s a great guy, and I would never want
to hurt his feelings, but…I just don’t know.”

The trouble
was, Jamie wasn’t the one I kept having vivid erotic dreams about
was he? He wasn’t the one that I kept fantasising about jumping
into bed with. He wasn’t the one who made my heart race when he
walked in the room. He wasn’t the one who seemed to give me an
electric shock if our hands accidently touched as we worked
together.

But I could
hardly tell Liam that, could I? Maybe my subconscious was diverting
my thoughts to someone totally unsuitable and unattainable as a
means of escaping from the truth that I was gay.

“Well, have you done any research? Read up about it
on the internet? Had counselling?” Liam demanded to know in his
usual forthright manner.

“I’ve spoken
to my friend Abbey about it. She’s bisexual, so I asked her advice.
She recommended I go to one of the LGBT - Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual
and Transgender - clubs she sometimes goes to, to meet different
people and try and work out who I'm attracted to. She thinks maybe
I’d feel less inhibited in that type of environment.”

“So have you
been?”

“No! No way!
Um…that is I haven’t had time. I've always been working at the
restaurant whenever she’s been going,” I ended lamely. Truthfully
the idea scared me, so I'd never accepted an invitation to go with
her.

“Well, don’t
you think you ought to make the time? My brother is under the
impression that he’s finally going to claim your virginity on this
weekend away, so I think he deserves to be disabused of that idea
if you’re going to tell him instead that you’re a lesbian.”

“What! Jamie
told you…he had no right to tell you that I was… How dare you
discuss the state of my….” I was so mortified and horrified that I
didn’t seem to be able to finish a sentence. I’d also turned pure
beetroot red.

Liam, the
bastard, seemed highly amused at my discomfort.

“I don’t see
why you're so embarrassed. Jamie and I discuss everything, so
naturally he confided all the details to me. I must say I find it
hard to believe that an attractive young woman like you is still a
virgin at what…twenty one or two? So I guess I can maybe see why
some doubts about your sexuality may have crept in.”

“I’ll work it
out for myself,” I managed to stutter out.

But then I
watched in fascination as Liam went over to my lap top and started
using it.

“Looks like
there’s one of those LGBT events on Friday at The Pink Club. As I
told you to hand your notice in at the restaurant, I'm assuming
you’re free so I’ll take you,” he stated, as he stared at the
screen.

“You!” I
stuttered.

“Yes, why
not?”

“Aren’t you
too busy… working or something?” I had no idea what the man did at
the weekend, other than the fact the boys had implied that was when
he was usually occupied with one of his special lady friends.

“No, as it
happens I have a free evening, and I’ve never been to this club, so
it’ll be a new and rather interesting experience for me. Don’t look
so surprised, Seraphina. I work hard, I play hard. I’m a very open
minded man, and I'm not easily shocked,” he chuckled, as he took in
my stunned expression.

Of course,
this was the man who was heavily into all sorts of kinky sex
according to Jamie and Toby. He’d probably use the occasion to set
himself up in a nice cosy threesome or something.

“I’ll be on
hand to make sure you don’t come to any harm, so you can just relax
and concentrate on getting a clue about your true sexuality. Maybe
don’t mention it to Jamie though, not until you see if it’s helped
you to make up your mind either way, to discover if you are
attracted to any of the other women there.”

As he stared
at me, I had the distinct impression that the only reason he was
offering to take me was so that he could make sure I didn’t back
out.

“I’m usually
out working on a Friday evening anyway, and Jamie always goes out
with his rugby mates. ”

Jamie and his
mates usually got pretty drunk most Friday nights, and when they
came back to our house, I was always glad I was tucked up out of
the way right at the top of the house. After these lads night
sessions, there was usually a disgusting bucket of vomit left in
the kitchen to dispose of when I came down the following morning.
And Jamie was so hung over that he struggled to get up at a decent
hour on Saturdays, so our date mornings had fizzled out after a few
weeks. But as I’d been so busy, it hadn't really bothered me. We
still saw each other in passing most days.

“What are you
trying to prove here? What exactly are your motives? Are you trying
to break Jamie and me up?” I asked. I finally saw Liam look
uncomfortable for a few seconds before the impassive mask came down
again.

“I’m just
looking out for my little brother, that’s all. I’d rather this
matter was sorted out well before he sits his finals, as he’ll need
to concentrate all his energies on them to do well,” he replied
brusquely. “And if you cared for him as much as you claim, then I'd
have thought you’d be eager to move things on between you one way
or the other, rather than leave them hanging in limbo ad
infinitum.”

I stuck my
chin up in the air defiantly. Who did he think he was, sitting in
judgement on our relationship? If it took going to this club to
prove a point to him, then I bloody well would.

“Okay. What
time shall I meet you at The Pink Club?”

“I’ll pick you
up from here at eight. Be ready. I don’t like being kept waiting.
Oh, and I suggest you wear something really feminine and sexy,
because if you do turn out to be a lesbian, I see you as the femme
partner rather than the butch, so you don’t want to give the wrong
impression.”

“Friday at
eight. I’ll be ready.”

And I’ll be
wearing whatever I bloody well choose, thank you very much Mr. Liam
interfering Starr.

“
You’d better call
me Liam tonight, rather than Sir or
Mr. Starr, otherwise everyone will assume I’m your Dom,” I said
quietly, as we wandered into The Pink Club.

“Dom?” she
queried.

“Yes. Even
though you’re not collared, they’ll probably still think you’re my
sub and then no one will come near you.”

That’s a
rather appealing notion.

“Collared…?
Dom… sub… what on earth are you talking about?” she whispered
back.

I held her arm
to stop her in her tracks, so that I could look at her face. No, by
her look of total confusion, she was being deadly serious. She
hadn't got a clue what I was talking about.

“You really
have led a sheltered existence, haven’t you? A Dominate and
submissive relationship. One where the submissive has agreed to
relinquish total control over to her Master or Dom, so that she
obeys him without question. Often the sub wears a collar as a sign
that she is her Dom’s property,” I explained.

“You mean like
a sex save?” Seraphina asked, clearly horrified.

“Well, not
really because it is so much more than that. It can be a whole way
of life, where the Dom controls every aspect of his sub’s
existence. Or it can just be a bit of role play fun for an agreed
period of time, such as for an evening or a weekend. As long as
it’s safe, sane and fully consensual, it’s fine.”

“Trust you to
know all about stuff like that,” Seraphina, muttered.

“What’s that
supposed to mean?”

“You don’t
think I’m the only one Jamie talks about, do you? I’ve heard quite
a bit about you and your sexual predilections as a matter of fact,”
she declared, as she stood there glaring at me. It seemed she was
still very upset that Jamie had confided in me about her virginal
status.

“What’s he
told you?” I asked, not appreciating being the subject of their
gossip.

“According to
the boys, you’re some kind of a legend because you’ve had more
women than they've had hot dinners. I’m told they always have to be
blonde, with massive boobs, and I’m sure you’ll be thrilled to
learn that the boys have spent quite some time discussing whether
you insist they have to be natural or whether it wouldn’t worry you
if they’d had a boob job. I think they came to the conclusion that
as long as the boobs in question looked and felt okay, you wouldn’t
be too worried, because you never see any of these women for more
than a few weeks at the most in any case. And apparently, you’re
really into all kinds of kinky sex, with an awesome stash of
amazing sex toys and other equipment.” She stood there defiantly
staring at me with her arms crossed.

I guessed it
did sum me up pretty well, but hearing it coming from Seraphina
made it sound very hard and calculating somehow.

“So that’s
what you’ve heard, is it?”

“Yes, so my
guess is you’re using coming here with me tonight as an excuse to
find yourself a new playmate or two, as you probably think people
here will be pretty open minded to that kind of thing. I also think
you’re hoping I’m going to discover I’m gay.”

“Is that what
you think, Seraphina?”

“Yes, it is,
Liam.”

I noticed her
use of my name, and for some strange reason I found I liked it.

“Well, you’re
wrong. My only agenda here tonight is to assist you to discover
your true sexuality, so that your relationship with Jamie can move
forward in whatever the appropriate direction turns out to be.”

“I think you
want me to be gay because you don’t approve of me. That’s why
you’ve brought me here, to try and push me in that direction,
because you’d rather Jamie and I split up,” she challenged me.