Spud - Learning to Fly

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Authors: John van de Ruit

BOOK: Spud - Learning to Fly
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PRAISE FOR
SPUD

‘… a witty, sharp and thoroughly entertaining book …’

www.southafricawriting.com

‘… John van de Ruit has cracked it … achingly funny …’

Michele Magwood,
Sunday Times Lifestyle

‘…
Spud
is a benchmark for comedic writing in the country and one of the most enjoyable reads I have had this year.’

Lauren Cohen,
EP Herald

‘Funniest book of the year’

Julia Paterson,
The Citizen

‘Funny, fast-paced and wonderfully observant …’

Book Shelf,
The Daily News

‘Funny, well-written and moving …’

Lindsay Slogrove,
The Mercury

‘Ek het lanklaas so lekker gelag!’

Beeld


Spud
is one of those books which could easily be dismissed as nothing more than an adolescent read at first glance, but once you pick it up it’s almost as if the pages turn themselves. All in all, a wonderful book.’

Metrobeat


Spud
is a delicious piece of writing, full of invention and very very funny.’

Derek Wilson,
The Argus

‘In this “wickedly funny” debut novel, John van de Ruit … has perfectly captured the life of a boy taking his first steps to manhood.’

Brian Joss,
Capetowner

John van de Ruit has talent. A lot of it.’

Kate White,
www.jhblive.com

SPUD – Learning to Fly

John
van
de Ruit

PENGUIN BOOKS

PENGUIN BOOKS

Published By the Penguin Group

Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty) Ltd, 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196, South Africa

Penguin Books Ltd, 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England

Penguin Group (USA) Inc, 375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA

Penguin Group (Canada), 90 Eglinton Avenue East, Suite 700, Toronto, Ontario, M4P 2Y3, Canada (a division of Pearson Penguin Canada Inc.)

Penguin Ireland, 25 St Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2, Ireland (a division of Penguin Books Ltd)

Penguin Group (Australia), 250 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, Australia (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd)

Penguin Books India Pvt Ltd, 11 Community Centre, Panchsheel Park, New Delhi – 110 017, India

Penguin Group (NZ), 67 Apollo Drive, Mairangi Bay, Auckland 1310, New Zealand (a division of Pearson New Zealand Ltd)

Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty) Ltd, Registered Offices: 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196, South Africa

www.penguinbooks.co.za

First published by Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty) Ltd 2009

Reprinted 2009, 2010

Copyright © John van de Ruit, 2009

All rights reserved

The moral right of the author has been asserted

Spud – Learning To Fly is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of any character
to any person alive or dead is entirely coincidental.

Except in the United States of America, this book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

ISBN: 978-0-14-302725-6

Contents

Acknowledgements

1992

Monday 20th January

Tuesday 21st January

Wednesday 22nd January

Thursday 23rd January

Friday 24th January

Saturday 25th January

Sunday 26th January

Monday 27th January

Tuesday 28th January

Wednesday 29th January

Thursday 30th January

Friday 31st January

Saturday 1st February

Monday 3rd February

Wednesday 5th February

Thursday 6th February

Friday 7th February

Saturday 8th February

Sunday 9th February

Thursday 13th February

Friday 14th February

Saturday 15th February

Monday 17th February

Wednesday 19th February

Thursday 20th February

Friday 21st February

Sunday 23rd February

Monday 24th February

Tuesday 25th February

Wednesday 26th February

Thursday 27th February

Friday 28th February

Saturday 29th February

Sunday 1st March

Monday 2nd March

Tuesday 3rd March

Wednesday 4th March

Thursday 5th March

Saturday 7th March

Sunday 8th March

Monday 9th March

Tuesday 10th March

Wednesday 11th March

Friday 13th March

Sunday 15th March

Monday 16th March

Tuesday 17th March

Wednesday 18th March

Thursday 19th March

Saturday 21st March

Sunday 22nd March

Wednesday 25th March

Thursday 26th March

Friday 27th March

Monday 30th March

Tuesday 31st March

Wednesday 1st April

Thursday 2nd April

Friday 3rd April

Saturday 4th April

Sunday 5th April

Wednesday 8th April

Saturday 11th April

Friday 17th April

Sunday 19th April

Monday 20th April

Tuesday 21st April

Friday 24th April

Monday 27th April

Tuesday 28th April

Wednesday 29th April

Thursday 30th April

Friday 1st May

Saturday 2nd May

Tuesday 17:00 J Milton.

Sunday 3rd May

Tuesday 5th May

wednesday 6th May

Sunday 10th May

Monday 11th May

Tuesday 12th May

Wednesday 13th May

Thursday 14th May

Friday 15th May

Saturday 16th May

Sunday 17th May

Monday 18th May

Wednesday 20th May

Friday 22nd May

Saturday 23rd May

Monday 25th May

Wednesday 27th May

Thursday 28th May

Friday 29th May

Saturday 30th May

Sunday 31st May

Monday 1st June

Tuesday 2nd June

Wednesday 3rd June

Thursday 4th June

Friday 5th June

Saturday 6th June

Sunday 7th June

Thursday 11th June

Friday 12th June

Saturday 13th June

Wednesday 17th June

Friday 19th June

Saturday 20th June

Sunday 22nd June

Tuesday 30th June

Wednesday 1st July

Thursday 2nd July

Friday 3rd/Saturday 4th July

Sunday 5th July

Tuesday 7th July – Working Day

Wednesday 8th July

Thursday 9th July

Monday 20th July

Wednesday 22nd July

Thursday 23rd July

Saturday 25th July

Sunday 26th July

Tuesday 28th July

Thursday 30th July

Saturday 1st August

Monday 3rd August

Tuesday 4th August

Wednesday 5th August

Friday 7th August

Sunday 9th August

Tuesday 11th August

Wednesday 12th August

Friday 14th August

Sunday 16th August

Wednesday 19th August

Sunday 23rd August

Wednesday 26th August

Thursday 27th August

Friday 28th August

Saturday 29th August

Sunday 30th August

Tuesday 1st September

Wednesday 2nd September

Friday 4th September

Sunday 6th September

Monday 7th September

Tuesday 8th September

Wednesday 9th September

Friday 11th September

Sunday 13th September

Monday 14th September

Wednesday 16th September

Thursday 17th September

Friday 18th September

Saturday 19th September

Sunday 20th September

Wednesday 23rd September

Thursday 24th September

Friday 25th September

Sunday 4th October

Wednesday 7th October

Friday 9th October

Sunday 11th October

Monday 12th October

Tuesday 13th October

Wednesday 14th October

Thursday 15th October

Friday 16th October

Saturday 17th October

Sunday 18th October

Monday 19th October

Tuesday 20th October

Wednesday 21st October

Thursday 22nd October

Saturday 24th October

Sunday 25th October

Monday 26th October

Tuesday 27th October

Wednesday 28th October

Friday 30th October

Saturday 31st October

Sunday 1st November (The Dying Season)

Monday 2nd November

Tuesday 3rd November

Wednesday 4th November

Friday 6th November

Saturday 7th November

Sunday 8th November

Monday 9th November

Tuesday 10th November

Wednesday 11th November

Thursday 12th November

Friday 13th November

Saturday 14th November

Sunday 15th November

Monday 16th November

Tuesday 17th November

Wednesday 18th November

Friday 20th November

Monday 23rd November

Thursday 26th November

Friday 27th November

Saturday 28th November

Sunday 29th November

Monday 30th November

Wednesday 2nd December

Thursday 3rd December

Friday 4th December

Acknowledgements

Like much in this world, writing a book is a bizarre business. The dichotomy of experiencing life as a creative wellspring and simultaneously hiding from its demands and realities creates a schizophrenic impulse to both devour and disappear. I would like to thank my great friends and family for not disowning me over the past sixteen months, and especially Julia, who has walked this journey with me every step of the way. Her influence is unseen, yet I doubt
Learning to Fly
would be what it is without her love, clever brain and the bountiful joy she brings to my life.

Alison Lowry – I cannot thank you enough for your inspiration, guidance and calming influence. Our Midlands imbizos cemented the building blocks for what was to follow, and your faith and brilliance cajoled me through the difficult months of editing and second guessing. It is unique for a writer to find an editor (and boss) whom he can trust implicitly to share his vision. You are the true mother of this series and what The Guv might call a delinquent visionary. Thanks, also, to the entire crew at Penguin Books who take my mad ramblings, turn them into beautiful books and ensure that they fly off the shelves. I feel like I have an army behind me and the success of Spud is as much yours, as it is mine. Special thanks to Tracey McDonald for thinking big, Janine (Leadfoot) Daniel for breaking the speed limit, and Claire Heckrath for her artistic gems.

Finally I want to thank you, the reader, for taking this journey with me. May these pages bring you joy and laughter and an insight into a world that is both familiar and foreign. After all, that is what you all have gifted me.

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