Sorcerer's Vendetta (The Secret of Zanalon) (16 page)

"But I could not 'ave imagined that 'is 'prentice be willin' ... Though an 'e were, that'd take the burden of black magick from Merlin, 'ere. There were conditions that 'e asked o' me, before ..." She stammered, shamed, glanced at Rachel and went on quickly, "So the 'prentice still would go to the Dark Ones."

The witch sneaked a glance at Merlin, who was narrowing his eyes at her suspiciously, and added, "'ad 'e been 'ere, o' course."  She turned away, looking at the slowly revolving pentagram, then back to Rachel.

"How long?" Rachel asked, in a voice that might have belonged to a kitten.

The witch glanced at the moon, three-quarters visible now.

"When the moon rises clear," she said. "Dost thou understand?" It was clear from her piercing look that she wanted Rachel to be fully aware of the choice she made. It was up to her whether or not to tell Merlin.
Her Zanalon
.

Rachel had made her decision from the moment she knew who she had been. But she was thankful the old woman had let her know what she faced.

Hell.

For answer, she turned to Merlin. The old woman, understanding, shuffled to the quiescent pentagram, to stand with her head down, her back to them. Rachel pushed down the tightness in her throat and closed her eyes.

Then thou dost have power ...

She knew what she had to do and somehow she knew how. It was as simple as wishing it so.

"Look at me," she whispered. She stepped in front of him and raised her hands to his shoulders. The cloak fell open, leaving her body as bare as her soul, clothed only in shadow, to him. Softly, she stroked a strand of his hair as he met her gaze. His eyes sparkled azure, enhanced by the light from the now blue-lit pentagram. Rachel cherished the love in his eyes, held it in her heart for forever.

"God, I love you so much ..." she whispered, felt her voice retreating. She held on to it. There was so much more to say, so little time.

"But I never understood you. And now ... Strange that we could come from different times, different worlds, and only then break through to each other. But now it's too late …"

Her voice began to break but she steeled herself and directed her thoughts back to what she had to do.  Rachel focused herself inward, sought out that which had slept inside her. His stolen power. She was consumed with self-loathing at the feel of it, its existence there evidence of what she had done. Now it was time to use it, to drive out the poison she had once stricken him with. She thrust it, with all of her will, out of her soul to return into his. Lightning flashed between them.

Caught off guard when the flare of immense power struck him, Merlin threw his head back and his whole body tensed, shuddering. Rachel heard him catch his breath, release it in a broken moan. She knew it was not pain, only an incredibly intense surge, but she was instantly sorry she could not have been gentler. She wanted to break away but she was afraid that would be worse.

His eyes glazed, reflecting the crackling lightning that shot from her, up her arms and into him.

"I'm sorry, God I'm so sorry ..." she breathed, in part for what was happening to him now, mostly for all that had passed before, what he could no longer deny. Now he had to know.

She was his murderer.

The connection continued, longer than she would have imagined, and then she heard Merlin make another sound. It started like a soft groan, then changed as she watched his eyes change, from the first shock to realization, squeezed shut in the pain of betrayal, then to something else. Something dark and deadly.

He was growling.

As the last shimmer of power died, he struck. His hands clamped at her wrists and he brought his head down, like a pain-maddened bull who has taken the last sword.

Slowly, he shook his head, agony and anger burning blue in his eyes, reflecting red now from the beckoning pentagram behind her. His upper lip curled back, feral.

"I ... loved ... thee ..."

Suddenly she felt herself thrust violently backward, airborne. Closing her eyes against the blur of night, she hit the ground hard and lay still, slack. Rachel felt Merlin on top of her. His weight held her down within the center of the glowing pentagram, his hands pinned her wrists.  She did not fight. If only she could just close her eyes and wait until it was over, justice done, but in her mind she saw the swirling demons, hungry-eyed. It would never be over.

She opened her eyes.

Merlin held himself over her, panting with the passion of hatred, his body traced with firelight and evil red mana, slick with a sheen of sweat.

"I loved thee ..." he breathed, a rough whisper.

Slowly, something in his eyes began to change, as slowly as the transformation from darkest night to dawn. His voice lost its snarl, softening into hurt.

"I loved thee ..."

Then, connection. His gaze pierced into her naked soul.

I love you, Merlin … I love you ...

His mind opened, echoes flowed within her.

Still, I love thee ... Niniene ... Hafgan, my son ... Rachel, beloved ... still ...
.

She felt the swirl of his emotions, his tears, blending with her own. Slowly, he lowered his head to touch his lips to hers, brushing gently, then deeply; he kissed her, joined with her, soul deep, deeply ... Lost in oneness, she cleaved to him and he to her. An instant eternal, she knew she would keep with her, a part of her soul. Even in damnation.

When he broke the kiss, the connection remained.

Into his mind, Rachel whispered, soothing,
Let me go, now ...this is as it must be, it is justice ...

He looked into her eyes and she felt something, something shaping in his mind, just for an instant before he closed the window to his soul. For a moment more he looked at her, then he glanced up; she could see the dark shapes shifting through red in the reflection of his eyes, hear their voices, like whispers of madness.

The Dark Ones were closing in.

Merlin turned to the east, the rising moon. Rachel dreaded to look also but she did. There was only a tiny sliver hidden.

He brought his gaze back to her, pushed himself up to his knees over her and reached to softly caress her cheek.

"Once I swore to teach thee vengeance," he whispered, "but thou hast taught me love. I love thee more than life, more than I hated the one who destroyed me. I know, anon, the futility of hatred when that soul can be one and the same."

He rose to his feet. Rachel went cold, knowing what he was going to do.

"No! Merlin, don't do this!" She pushed herself up quickly, clung to him, climbing to her feet to hold him, protect him. He pulled back, glancing to the moon, then hesitantly accepted her embrace. She choked on a sob, holding him, but she knew what she had to do; there was no more time. She shoved at him, trying to push him out of the pentagram, but he barely budged---one step, no more; he rooted himself like an oak. Finally he wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly.

"Remember me and regret not," he whispered at her ear, softly nuzzling.

"No, Merlin, no ..."

He pulled her to him, kissed her again.  But this kiss was different. Suddenly Rachel realized her body was relaxing against her will, her strength draining from her. She struggled weakly, but it was done.  Her body failed her.

He had made sure she would not stop him.

Her body completely slack, her head fell against his chest. Her eyes were burning in frustration, spirit betrayed by flesh. Merlin held her up, stroked her hair gently, as he whispered into its softness.

"Accept this now as a gift, my lady. Please." His voice was low as his arms tightened around her, the crackling surge of power emanated from him, thrumming through her like sensual voltage, intensifying as he drew her lips to his, final, desperately penetrating. The mana poured into her, shivering along her nerves, her muscles ached to contract, but could not. She couldn't fight it. Rachel could do nothing, nothing but feel; feel him, his power, his love, feel it for forever and hold the instant inside her soul.

Finally he withdrew, slowly. His eyes were downcast, though she prayed for one more glance from him; she knew, at that moment, he couldn't look in her eyes and let go. He held her head gently like a helpless infant's and looked up to watch the damning moon.

"Keep a promise for me, my love? On thy return," he asked. Something that tried to be a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth at his request.

The elementals. Free his beloved elementals ...

Tears burned hot and alive from her eyes. She blinked as they welled over and spilled across her cheeks.

No, no, don't do this,
she tried to say but all that came out was a moan.

He lowered her to the ground, the whisper of his voice reached her like a touch of dew. One last time he met her pleading gaze, but he was committed now to his course.

"Look for me. Always. E'en an I must break Death's doors, I will find thee ..."

Carefully he pulled the cloak protectively around her and straightened, his eyes moved to the threatening moon and all she could do was watch and whimper between each labored breath, "No ... no ... no ... Merlin ..."

Merlin lifted his head and opened his arms to the night. His eyes closed, he trembled with the effort to focus his will, push back the encroaching demons.

"Ki ... lirias ... tev!"

The pentagram began to revolve again, moving into violet. Rachel could see nothing of the elementals, dark or light, anymore, but she heard snarling, snapping fangs from all around them; something howled with rage denied in a voice that chilled her to her soul, even more so because it seemed almost human. But the furies were pushed back, the cacophony of hatred faded. The star moved toward the blue.

"Ki lirias tev!
Arianta! Torendar! Oshiren!"

Rachel hauled herself up on one elbow, her body stone weight, reached out to him, though there was no chance she could touch him. There were more he called but she didn't hear.

Star blue.

The moon rose free of the edge of the earth.

The clock at the foot of the pentagram disintegrated in a silent, slow-motion explosion.

"Mmmmmeeeeerrrllliiinnn!!!" she screamed.

White rushed in lightning from each point of the pentagram, converging over her, in the center.

In Merlin.

His body shuddered, shimmered in blazing white for an instant, then the light rushed out from him in shafts of pure power, rushing up in a swirling ricochet off the inside of an invisible sphere, arcing back behind him.

The pentagram went dark.

It was done.

Merlin stood silhouetted against a flare of light behind him, the other pentagram awakened. Rachel held a shaking hand up to him, squinted to see his face, hoping ... still ...

Couldn't they have spared him ...? Oh, please, couldn't they let him live?

Slowly, he sank downward.

No ...

His head lolled forward, his knees struck the ground.  The shock sent a ripple through his long, glossy hair, just as the mane of a powerful stallion ripples when he paws the earth. The irony of the image was sickening now, such power, such emptiness. Her stomach twisted.

Then he fell, his body slack.

Oh, no ...

Rachel caught his upper body as he fell against her. She struggled to pull him to her.

He's heavy. He never seemed heavy to me before ...

A shard of shattered memory, his eyes intense azure as he held himself above her, mirroring moonlight, his heat merged inside her.

Never heavy ...

"Merlin ..." Her lower lip trembled as she whispered his name, her voice plaintive. "Merlin ... don't … Nooooo..."

Gently she cradled his head, stroking his silky hair. A tear struck his cheek, sparkling in the light of the full moon.

His sapphire eyes were empty.

Merlin was dead.

Chapter 12 – MONUMENT

Lost. Floating in emptiness. The pain through her being did not ease with the release of tears. Her heart ripped her apart as if it had become a glass bauble and shattered inside her.

Merlin ...

Rachel never let go of him.

She didn't remember drawing her hand across his eyes, only rocking him, pretending, "Shhhh ... sleep. Sleep ..."

She didn't remember the wail that caught in her throat and left her silently staring at the guilty moon, until her agony tore it from her chest in an animal cry, questioning the ruthless night.

Rachel never let Merlin go.

How could they do this? How could they kill him? He loved them ...
It was unbearable, remembering now the kiss of the elemental he had called Arianta.
And they loved him... Zanalon, she called him. Beloved
.

Why? Why didn't they let him live...?

She held him, rocking, stroking his silky hair.
Why would they take him from me? I can't bear it... I can't... I love him, I always have.