I went into
Songbirds
to see Marcus, and talk to him about it next. As soon as I mentioned what Cole had said, he turned red, which was a dead giveaway. I told him I didn’t need his charity, and he could find someone else to work the bar shifts. I would, however, continue playing on Monday and Tuesday nights if he still wanted me to.
As for Cole, I hadn’t seen him since I got back from my trip to Sydney, and I didn’t plan to.
Well, that wasn’t technically true. I had been sitting out on my balcony two nights ago, wrapped in a blanket, strumming the guitar that Cole had left at my place and not yet bothered to collect. I was trying to remember the song Cole had played on the beach for me, and as I was thinking I looked through the trees down to the street and the cafes below.
There were hardly any tables set up outside anymore, as the weather had turned cold. But on this particular night, I watched as a waiter carried a small table and one chair outside, and set it up. I thought it was strange that anyone would want to sit outside in the cold to eat.
But my curiosity turned to surprise when I saw Cole, wearing a heavy jumper and a slouchy beanie, pull the seat around to the other side of the table and sit down, facing my apartment. He sipped on a coffee, then ordered another one, just sitting there by himself for more than an hour. When he finally got up to leave, he took one last look up at my balcony. I couldn’t resist; I reached in around the corner and flicked my lights on and off a couple of times.
I watched as he waved, and gave me a beaming smile before turning and walking home.
I spent the next week helping Kelli pack, and arrange to ship her belongings up to Sydney. I arranged her farewell drinks at work, and bought her a going-away present. I usually enjoyed organising things like that, but on this occasion it just upset me because I was organising it to say goodbye to my best friend.
Kelli left my details with her rental agent in case they needed someone to go back over to her old apartment, and I promised to keep in touch, and visit as soon as I could. Then we hugged again for the one-hundredth time, and I watched as she started on her nine-hour drive to Sydney and her new life.
I sat on my couch, at a loss with what to do with myself. I had spent all my free time with one of my so-called friends, but now that I was back with Riley I felt totally alone. I hated to admit it to myself, but I missed Cole the most.
I missed spending time with him, playing music with him, singing with him, and just being able to look at his eyes, and listen to his deep gravelly voice. I sighed, and I tried to think of something else. I still felt so betrayed by him. It felt like a knife twisting in my chest when I thought about what he had said, about not having to spend time with me anymore, like it had been a chore.
I was just thinking about texting Riley to see if he could Skype me when there was a knock on the door.
Must be Jason.
I dragged myself off the couch, and opened the door.
It was Riley, dressed in his camouflage shirt and pants.
“Oh my God!” I threw myself into his arms, and he laughed as I knocked the wind out of him.
Grabbing his hand, I dragged him in. “What are you doing here?” I asked, beaming at him.
He kept hold of my hand and led me to the couch, then perched on the edge nervously. He patted the couch beside him for me to sit, and then ran his hand through his hair.
My stomach twisted with dread. Why was he dressed in his uniform? Did this mean he was on duty? Something was seriously wrong.
He was looking at me, but he didn’t speak. Finally, he exhaled, and met my eyes. “My unit is being deployed,” he told me. “They’ve given us twenty-four hours to say goodbye to anyone who’s important, and then we have to fly out.” He stopped, watching my face as I’m sure it turned ghostly white.
“Where are you going? How long will you be gone?” I tried to think of all the important things to ask, but one thing just kept screaming in the back of my brain: “He’s leaving me.”
He was holding my hands, stroking my knuckles with his thumbs. I knew this because I could see his thumbs moving, but I couldn’t feel it—I couldn’t feel anything, I was totally numb.
“I can’t tell you where we’re going. It’s a Special Forces Op, and it’s classified, but I think I’ll be gone for about six months.” He paused again as I processed the information—or, should I say, lack of information.
“Will I be able to reach you? Will you be safe?” I couldn’t go for six months without Riley, but worse still, I couldn’t bear to think of him in a life-threatening situation.
“There will be limited communication, but we can write to each other, and hopefully the letters will get through.” He looked down at our hands, still locked together. “It will be dangerous, but that’s what we’ve been training for all these years. We’ll be fine, babe, just a walk in the park.”
I climbed onto his lap. “We only have twenty-four hours together?” I sniffed back a tear. I did not want to spend our last hours together a blubbering mess.
He looked at his watch. “We have about eighteen hours, now. I got on the first flight I could.”
Damn!
I started crying. Why was I always such a sook?
“Babe, please don’t cry. I have something important I need to ask you.”
Looking up, I tried my best to stop the tears from flowing. He was looking at me with such love in his eyes that I had to look away. I had just got him back after all those months apart. I couldn’t say goodbye again.
I sniffed again, and wiped my nose with a tissue I had tucked up my sleeve. Then I nodded; I was ready to talk about whatever he needed to talk about.
“So …” He shifted and lifted me off his knee.
Why did I need to get off his knee? I wanted to stay on his knee forever. But as I was about to protest I realised he had moved me off so he could get down on one knee.
I gasped and clutched at my chest. Was this really happening?
“Tara Louise O’Connell, I love you more than life itself. I fell in love with you the night we met; you never fail to amaze me with your generosity, and the love and warmth you give to everyone around you. I feel so blessed to be one of those people. Being loved by you has made me a stronger, better man. I know I can’t give you everything you deserve, but I would happily give you everything I have if you would agree to be my wife. Will you marry me?”
He stopped talking, and somewhere along the line he had pulled a ring box out of his pocket, but I swear I don’t remember it happening. I was just trying to breathe, and remember everything that he had just said, the words replaying over and over in my head.
I think he took my silence as contemplation, so he quickly started talking again. “I know we haven’t been together for that long, and it’s a lot to ask of you to wait for me to get back. But I know it will help me get through the next six months, just knowing that you are here waiting for me. And I hope it will help you get through the next six months, knowing that I’m coming back to you. And when I get back, I promise I’ll relocate to Melbourne, and get out of field work, just so we can be together.”
I opened my mouth, still stunned. Then I nodded. “Yes, oh, Riley, yes, of course I will marry you. I love you so much. You know I would wait an eternity for you, just as long as you promise you’ll come back.”
Tears were falling again, but this time they were happy tears, and I let them tumble down my cheeks.
I looked down at the ring. It was perfect. One oval-cut diamond on two thin diamond-covered bands. My hands were shaking so much that Riley had to hold me still to slip the ring on. I looked down at my hand; it fit perfectly, and it was exactly what I would have chosen.
I looked into his eyes. He was crying too. I threw myself into his arms, and he went rolling backwards onto the floor, still holding me, laughing.
“I promise I’ll come back to you,” he whispered.
After we had stopped crying, laughing and rolling around on the floor kissing, we got back up on the couch and snuggled. I kept looking at my watch, praying that time would somehow stand still, but every time I checked another fifteen minutes had passed.
“Stop looking at your watch,” Riley told me as he nuzzled into my neck.
“Give me something else to focus on then,” I said, with my eyebrows raised.
He gave me a sexy smile, and then grabbed my hand and led me into the bedroom.
We made love for hours, savouring each other’s bodies as if it were the last time we would ever see each other. I hoped down to the bottom of my heart that it wouldn’t be.
Riley told me a hundred times that he loved me, and I told him a hundred times that I would wait for him because I loved him too. We even allowed ourselves the luxury of fantasising about our wedding. We agreed that on the beach in Fiji would be the perfect location.
When there were only a few hours left, I asked Riley if he would like to say goodbye to anyone else. I knew Marcus and Jason in particular would be upset if they didn’t get to see him. We were just about to leave to head down to
Songbirds
, when I realised that Cooper would be leaving, too.
“I need to call Kelli and Cooper,” I said to him, suddenly panicking.
I knew Kelli had only just relocated to Sydney, and she would be devastated to have to say goodbye to Cooper. We called them, and put the phone on speaker. I spoke to Cooper, and wished him a safe trip. I would miss his jokes and teasing, and I had to remind myself it would only be six months, not forever.
Then Kelli said goodbye to Riley, and asked if I had anything to tell her. I looked at Riley, and he shrugged at me. They knew Riley was going to propose, and were waiting for the good news.
I clicked a quick photo of my hand with the ring on it and sent it to Kelli, then told her I would call when I got back from the airport later on.
The Sons were playing, which was great. I didn’t think Riley would be that interested in saying farewell to Cole, but he had always gotten on well with Jay.
We entered via the staff backdoor and headed over to Jason, who was sitting at the end of the bar. He immediately noticed the uniform, and raised his eyebrows at me questioningly.
I tried to smile, but damn, I was just one big ball of tears at the moment.
Riley called Marcus over, and quickly explained that he was going away, and then, turning to me, asked them to keep an eye on me for him.
I looked at their faces. Riley didn’t know anything about what had happened previously, but I quickly told them that they didn’t need to babysit me again.
“Rubbish! We weren’t babysitting you last time, Tars,” Jason said, annoyed. “We’re your friends and we love you. We’ll help you through this.”
I gave him a hug. I would definitely need friends; the next six months were going to be tough.
Marcus looked at me and smiled. “Work as many shifts as you need to. Spend as much time here as you want. I love having you around; you know that.” Then, he quickly clarified to Riley, “As a friend of course, nothing more.”
We were having a drink when the band stopped for a break, and Jay and Cole came over.
Jay noticed the uniform straight away, his brow furrowed. “What’s going on?” he asked, realising that Riley must be on duty to be dressed that way.
Riley explained to Jay, who just nodded, and then turned to me and gave me a hug. He had been through this with his dad many times over the years, and more importantly, had supported his mum.