Something Witchy (Mystics & Mayhem)

BOOK: Something Witchy (Mystics & Mayhem)
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Copyright © AJ Myers, 2012, All Rights Reserved

 

No part of this work may be photocopied or otherwise reproduced without the express written permission of the author.

 

 

 

More Great Character Novels from Parasite Publications:

 

(COMING DEC 15 2012) Mystics & Mayhem: Something Wicked – AJ Myers

(COMING SOON) Mystics & Mayhem: Something Wanton – AJ Myers

(COMING SOON) Mystics & Mayhem: Something Wild – AJ Myers

 

Guardians of the First Realm: Alaskan Fire – Sara King

Guardians of the First Realm: Alaskan Fury – Sara King

(COMING SOON) Guardians of the First Realm: Alaskan Fang – Sara King

(COMING SOON) Guardians of the First Realm: Alaskan Fiend – Sara King

 

Outer Bounds: Fortune's Rising – Sara King

 

(COMING SOON) ZERO: Forging Zero – Sara King

(COMING SOON) ZERO: Killing Zero – Sara King

(COMING SOON) ZERO: Zero's Legacy – Sara King

(COMING SOON) ZERO: Forgotten – Sara King

 

Millennium Potion: Wings of Retribution – Sara King

 

Terms of Mercy: To the Princess Bound – Sara King

(COMING SOON) Terms of Mercy: Slave of the Dragon Lord – Sara King

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Meet Stuey!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer:

 

Just in case you misunderstood the description of this interesting tale, you are about to read a book about vampires, demons, and ghosts.  As most of you know, none of the creatures listed above are real.  While there
are
witches out there, the witches found herein are a different breed of witches that live only in my head.  This is a work of
fiction
, people!  There is no Moonlight, Missouri—but there should be because it just sounds cool.  There is also no Red Rock Bay, Washington—though you will find the town in a few of my other books.  Also, if one of my imaginary friends reminds you of your boyfriend, or your Great Aunt Gertrude, or your Chemistry teacher, just say “Awesome!” and keep reading, because I can assure you it wasn’t intentional.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Poem that Started it All:

 

If I were a witch of magical sorts

I’d brew up a mixture of frog eyes and warts.

A masterful mix of love potion I’d brew

And cast the spell to fall over you.

I’d add a little patience, need, want, worry and lust

With a pinch of passion, warmth, kindness and trust.

I’d throw in regret, hate and sadness, too

To balance the scales of the magical brew.

I’d leave out the sugar for fear you’d be sweet

And replace it with snails so you’d love only me.

A dash of laughter with a splash of desire

To keep the flames burning with no cause to tire.

I’d stir it forwards and three times backward for luck.

I’d add mischief and madness in case of a rut.

I’d whisper in a prayer and beg Father Time

To make it last forever, forgetting reason and rhyme.

To finish this potion, I’d add a single tear drop

And promise to love you until the day my heart stops.

If I were a witch of magical sorts

A masterful mix of love potion I’d stew

And cast the spell to fall over you.

 

 

Kathy Holmes

 

 

 

 

Dedication:

 

For Terrica, for being my “Twinkie” and the other half of my very warped brain.  And for reading every single rewrite and begging for more.

 

For Trey, who’s more like me than he wants to admit.  Stubborn determination takes us far, doesn’t it sweetheart?  I can never tell you how proud I am of you, or how much I love you.

 

For Ben, for the ongoing saga of the “Mysterious Girl in the Box” and for fluffy killer pancakes and homicidal bacon.  Love you, buddy.

 

For Sierra, who epitomizes the word ‘drama’.  You’ve been a never-ending source of inspiration and laughter, baby girl, and I love you more than I can tell you.

 

For Tate, who has more personality in his little finger than most people have in their entire body.  Love you, pumpkinhead. 

 

For my sister, Audrey, without whom I would be totally insane.  This is for making sure I remembered there was another world besides the one I created in my head.  And for not letting me bring my laptop when I came to visit.

 

For Tammy, Sam, and John, the greatest first-readers an author could ask for.  You guys are the best!

 

For Sara (AKA: Obi-wan), the world’s greatest editor, mentor, and friend.  This is for making me rewrite over and over and over again until it was right—and for ignoring me when I whined about it.  And for making me the writer you knew I could be.  Thanks, hon!  You’re awesome!

 

And last, but never least, this, like everything else I do in my life, is for my amazing, romantic, funny, semi-crazy (or maybe all the way crazy) soul mate, Ronnie.  This is for all the nights you kissed the top of my head and went to bed alone so I could finish that next chapter.  This is for all the meals I didn’t cook and the laundry I didn’t fold because I was editing.  This is for all the drives through the country when I was stuck and frustrated.  But, mostly, this is for loving me and cheering me on and telling me to “Put on my big girl panties, suck it up, and get it done”. I love you sooo much, baby.

 

 

 

 

Table of Contents

 

Chapter 1:  Parental Patrol

Chapter 2:  Every Girl Needs a Stalker

Chapter 3:  Crash Course in Creepy

Chapter 4:  The Truth Does Not Set You Free; It Gets You Blackmailed

Chapter 5:  Demons, Vampires, and Witches!  Yeah, Right!

Chapter 6:  Abducted by the Undead

Chapter 7:  Vampire Vanquish

Chapter 8:  Caveman Mentality

Chapter 9:  Motel Madness

Chapter 10:  The Price of Flight

Chapter 11:  Dream a Little Dream of Me

Chapter 12:  Falling for the Fanged

Chapter 13:  Confessions

Chapter 14:  Vampire Mind Meld

Chapter 15:  Witch Bane

Chapter 16:  Demon Bashing 101

Chapter 17:  Tantrums and Teleportation

Chapter 18:  Making a Deal with the Devil

Chapter 19:  Just When I Think it Can't Get Worse...  It Does

Chapter 20:  Feel the Burn

Chapter 21:  Mr. Right

Chapter 22:  Demon Damage

Chapter 23:  Heart and Soul

Epilogue:  The Next Chapter Begins

 

Author's Note

About the Author

Sneak Peek of AJ's next book, Something Wicked

 

 

 

 

 

Parental Patrol

 

 

My problems all started with a dead guy.

Okay, maybe that’s not fair.  I mean, I can’t really blame
all
my problems on one guy.  I only wish.  No, my problems actually started before the dead guy showed up and finished off the destruction of a life that wasn’t all that normal to begin with.  In fact, I would go as far as to say I had the kinds of problems that land most people in the psych ward…drooling and talking to the walls.  But I was good with it.  I knew how to handle it.  And then, all that changed.

Which is why I blame the dead guy.

 

As bad days go, it was epic. 

First, my alarm decided to malfunction and I woke up over an hour later than I should have.  Then the hot water heater went out—Dad’s fault for getting a really lame plumber—and I ended up taking the coldest shower in history.  Seriously, why is it that the hot water
always
seems to go out right after you lather up your hair? 

Teeth chattering and feeling like a walking icicle, I finally made it downstairs with the intention of finding a Pop Tart on my way out the door.  I immediately wished I had just stopped at the coffee shop for a bagel or something on my way to school when I walked into the kitchen to find my parents lying in wait for me.  It was crash test dummy time again. 

The suckiest part about having parents who are shrinks
and
published authors is that they always feel like they have to try out all their new techniques for communicating with a teenager on me.  They had forgotten, once
again
, that I’m legally an adult.  That really wasn’t much of a surprise considering the ‘Big Day’ had slipped their collective mind until two weeks after my birthday, at which point I found a cheesy birthday card taped to my bedroom door along with the keys to a brand new Miata MX-5 convertible.  It hurt that they had forgotten my birthday, but I got a brand new car out of the deal, so I wasn’t holding a grudge or anything.

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