Something Like Redemption (Something Like Normal #2) (15 page)

I shrug. “Well, isn’t it?”

Nothing makes sense. Not that it ever did. But now, everything is a big fucking mess.

Quinn closes his eyes, and I know once he opens them, he’s about to reveal a big secret that’ll change everything.

“No, Red, it’s not,” he says, opening his eyes. “It’s so far from the truth it’s not even funny,” he admits, meeting my eyes. “I
want
you,” and he says ‘
want
,’ as if the word itself has just burned him. “I want you with every fiber of my body, and I have never wanted anything, anyone, as much as I do you.”

“Then why did you leave last night? I needed you. As pathetic as that makes me, I needed you to make me forget,” and he doesn’t need me to clarify what I needed forgetting. “Why do you always stop me when I try and touch you? You won’t let me in and let me know you, which is unfair, because you know everything there is to know about me,” I reply sadly.

“Because,” he says, storming toward me, wrapping his big hands around my trembling arms. “Because, Red… I don’t want you to stop looking at me the way that you do,” he confesses, his lips falling into a frown.

This conversation is a familiar one, as it’s one we had not so long ago when the tables were turned.

“How do I look at you?” I ask softly, repeating the words spoken to me.

“Like I’m
worth
looking at. Like I’m worth
something
,” he replies, repeating my response to him.

“You don’t realize how much you’re worth,” I whisper, parroting his exact words.

“Red, I’m not a good person,” he says, again using my words, and I suddenly realize how Quinn has lived my past in his own way.

He has a soul crushing secret, consuming him just like I did. But I have to make it better for him, just how he did for me.

“Yes, you are. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have left your home for me. And you wouldn’t put yourself in danger for me, time and time again,” I beseech, needing him to believe me.

He takes a deep breath, his beautiful features contorting with his confession. “Last night when you said I was yours, you don’t understand how badly I wanted that to be true.”

I gasp at his confession, but he continues. “Then to see you open up to me, asking me to touch you, God damn, I’m an asshole, because that’s all I wanted to do. That’s
all
I ever want to do. I have to stop myself from touching you every God damn second of the fucking day!” he shouts passionately.

“Why?” I ask, confused, stunned by his admission.

“Because I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve to be happy, and with you, Red, that’s what I am, happy. And the guilt I feel, knowing that, it eats away at me. I don’t deserve any happiness because of—”

But he doesn’t continue, he just lowers his eyes and closes them tightly.

“Why don’t you deserve to be happy?” I ask when he doesn’t speak.

As he meets my eyes, I can see the pain behind his, and I know that whatever Quinn did, he lives with it every second of his life.

“Because, Red, you’re not the only one who has a past. But like I told you, you didn’t have a choice… but I did.”

“What did you do?” I ask firmly, putting it out there. It doesn’t matter what he did, because it would never change how I feel about him.

He only shakes his head, his hair shadowing his torn eyes. “I can’t tell you.”

I huff in annoyance and break out of his grip. “You’re fucking kidding me. After everything, you still won’t tell me? After everything we’ve been through?”

He firmly shakes his head once again, chewing on his lip ring. “No.”

His curt reply hurts, and I feel like I’ve been slapped with his distrust. “Well, fine!” I yell, my feet leading me toward the door as I need to get away from him.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks, watching my movements.

“I’m not sure, but anywhere is better than here,” I reply angrily.

I’m trying to be understanding because I have firsthand experience with how Quinn feels. I’ve lived it. But back then, I didn’t know him. I didn’t know I could trust him with my secret like he knows he can with me. Or does he? Maybe I’m living in a fantasy world, and need to snap the fuck back into reality.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he snarls, quickly stepping in front of the door, arms crossed.

“Oh please, what are you going to do? Gag me? Tie me to the bed? Throw me over your shoulder? You’re all talk, Quinn Berkeley. Now move,” I demand, my voice never wavering as I stand my ground.

The air is sizzling with an unseen static, and as we stare at one another, our chests rising and falling steadily, I know something big is about to happen.

I just didn’t anticipate what.

Quinn is on me before I have time to back away, but who am I kidding? I lunge for him the same moment he lunges for me, and as he pushes me up against the wall, he envelops my body with his.

Our mouths collide and it feels like an atomic bomb has just exploded within, causing a ripple effect throughout my entire body.

I can’t get close enough to Quinn fast enough, and as I’m pawing at him, in desperate need to consume him whole, it’s still not enough. I drive my eager hands under his t-shirt, pulling his hips toward me so I’m rubbing up against him like a cat in heat.

I can’t stop.

And neither can Quinn as his hands and mouth are seeking out every part of me. His hoop bites into my lip, and I moan, loving the pain. His hand is braced on the back of my head, controlling the intensity of the kiss, and I happily comply, as there’s nothing I want more than this.

His other hand slips under my shirt, and I gasp at the skin to skin contact. As his fingers trail up my torso, stopping at my right breast, he matches the rhythm of his mouth to complement the delicious way his fingers begin rubbing over my nipple feverishly.

I’m squirming under his hand, my nipple pebbling into a tight peak, wishing he would touch it in the flesh. He reads me like a book as he slips his hand under, pushing the cup aside, tugging on the bud softly.

I cry out, my lips coming off of Quinn’s as I lean back, angling my body, which bucks as he pinches and rolls my nipple until I’m sore and achy. The pain steadily begins throbbing between my legs as he places long, wet kisses down my throat, sucking over my pounding pulse. I feel hot and needy, and I want, no, I
need
a release.

I need it before I explode.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you off,” he whispers against my throat, and his words have me virtually plummeting to the ground.

I can feel his huge arousal pressing against my leg, and that makes me all the needier. I slowly slip my hand out between us, and timidly touch over his jeans, rubbing the impressive bulge softly.

Quinn’s fingers still from plucking my nipple into a permanent peak and he groans, leaning his head forward, his long hair brushing my cheeks.

“That feels amazing,” he pants as I start to gain a little more confidence, and begin rubbing a little harder.

I want more than anything to do to him what he does to me when he places his hands on me… down there. But I don’t know how.

“Show me,” I whisper, rubbing faster and faster over his erection.

His fingers match my speed, and we’re both moaning and bucking against one another. His heated eyes focus on mine, and he bites his lip ring as I roll my thumb over the tip of him.

“I will. But you first,” he says, slipping out of my hold and removing his fingers from the inside of my bra.

I whimper, but that transforms into a groan as one big hand braces onto my hip, while the other flicks open the top button of my jeans, slipping into the front of my pants. His hand stills when he feels I have no underwear on.

He cocks an eyebrow at me. “Oh, Red… you’re a bad, bad girl.”

I moan louder as he curls a finger inside of me, sliding in with no difficulty as I’m wetter than I have ever been before.

With my tight-fitting jeans, Quinn has limited space to work with, but boy, does he make it work. I’m shamefully riding his hand as he inserts another finger, his thumb rubbing over my swollen bud, and I scream, about to come.

Bracing my hand on his shoulder, unable to hold myself up, Quinn chuckles, all too aware of the power he has over my body.

“Not yet,” he purrs, slowing down the tempo of his fingers, his thumb lessening the pressure, knowing how close I am.

I whimper, wanting nothing more than to let go, but Quinn has something up his sleeve. I can see it in the way his mouth tips into a sultry smile as I call out his name.

“I want you in my mouth when you do,” he whispers, his eyes pinning me with his words.

I am too far gone to blush or shy away, because I want it. I want it so bad my fingers grasp my zipper, about to finish the job myself. However, as my fingers are halfway down, unfastening my zipper, Quinn stops me.

I moan, as I’m desperate to get my pants off before I burst into flames.

“Take your jeans and shirt off,” he says, kissing my sweaty forehead, taking a step away from me.

I know it’s a simple request, but it’s one that has my heart galloping wildly. I attempt to reach down to untie my boots, but Quinn shakes his head.

“Leave the boots. Just the jeans and shirt.”

My eyes widen, unsure why he’s requesting this, but by the heated look in his eyes, I know I’m going to like whatever he has planned.

Shyly fumbling with the hem of my t-shirt, I quickly yank it off over my head, only standing in my lacy bra and jeans, which are sitting dangerously low on my hips.

My hands awkwardly hang by my sides, anxious to cover my sudden bareness. But I don’t because as Quinn’s eyes drown in a pool of inky black, I know his response is elicited because of me. And I like it. So, I stand bravely, meeting his look of molten desire, my deep breathing the only betrayal of my nervousness.

Quinn’s tongue darts out to wet his lower lip, and my breath hitches, knowing what that tongue can do to my body.

“Jeans,” he simply says, pointing to my legs.

Why is he just standing there and staring? This would be a lot easier if he did it himself. And if there wasn’t so much light.

Quinn can see me mull over his request, so he slowly reaches to his left, flipping off the light. The room is shrouded in partial darkness, and the only glow which illuminates the room is from the stars, which are shining brightly in the New Orleans sky. And it’s simply beautiful.

As I unzip my pants, the sound is amplified in the huge room, making me feel more anxious than I already am. My clumsy fingers fumble as I slowly glide my jeans down my legs, and I ensure my eyes never leave Quinn’s as they reach the floor. They are tight fitting and it’s a struggle, but I manage to get them past my boots without having to take them off.

I kick them onto the floor and shyly stand at full height, totally bare to Quinn’s heated stare. I feel nervous, but I also feel excited. However, I’m grateful the lights have been switched off, because even in the darkness, I can see the hunger in Quinn’s eyes. Those eyes, which are fixated on my naked core.

I shift my legs, attempting to conceal myself, but Quinn stops me by taking a step toward me. “You’re the most beautiful thing I have ever seen,” he whispers, his eyes never leaving mine.

A beam of soft light reflects off his face, highlighting the aroused look rocking his chiseled features as he scans down my body. “Hands above your head,” he demands softly. “Hold onto the railing.”

I didn’t even notice a silver railing above my head, but as I tilt my chin to look at it, it looks like some kind of suave coat hanger which resembles a towel rack. I don’t know why he’s asking me to do this, but I nervously obey, my heart pounding with each movement. The metal feels cool as I slip my palms under the bar, holding on tight. It’s a welcomed feeling because I’m burning up from head to toe.

“Spread your legs,” Quinn whispers as he drops to his knees in front of me.

“W-what are you doing?” I stumble over my words as my tongue is sticking to the roof of my mouth.

“Worshiping a Siren,” he replies, looking up at me, his hair slipping over one perfect brow.

My breath hitches, and as the air brushes over my drenched core when I slowly spread my legs wider, I shiver in absolute desire, knowing that he means every word.

As he leans forward, his face is inches away from my center, and he leisurely inhales, sucking on his lip ring. I automatically attempt to shut my legs, embarrassed, but also a little turned on by his desire.

“Nah nah,” he scolds lightly, catching his hands on my inner thighs to stop them from moving an inch.

I peer down at him, and the sight before me sends my unstable legs drooping forward. Thankfully I’m holding myself up, otherwise, I would have crumbled into a messy mound.

Quinn’s hands glide up my legs and slowly wrap around to my ass, cupping each cheek firmly into his strong palms. As he squeezes tightly, my insides involuntarily clench, and my stomach ripples in excitement.

This sight of Quinn on his knees before me, looking up at me as he worships my body, is a sight I will never forget. Nor will I ever forget the feel of Quinn lowering his mouth onto me and licking my entrance in one long, agonizing lick.

I jerk under his mouth, as he doesn’t give my shaky legs a minute to steady as he pushes my ass forward, giving him deeper access to his probing tongue. A moan leaves my parted lips as my head drops back and my eyes slip shut, my long, loose hair tickling my back.

His skillful tongue is twirling inside of me, ensuring every part of me is thoroughly explored. I moan, whimper, and groan, but it still provides me with no comfort, as Quinn is holding my body prisoner with no intention of ever letting it go.

He softly nips at my bud, and as I buckle, I suddenly understand why Quinn requested me to stand here. I’m able to hold myself up when pleasure overcomes me, and my legs are about to give out at any moment.

As he flicks his tongue back and forth over my center, I hold on for dear life. I never thought I could feel sexy standing in just a bra and boots, but I do. I feel like a total Goddess.

“Holy fuck,” I gasp as Quinn buries his face deeper into my valley and begins thrusting his tongue in and out of my entrance.