Authors: Margery Sharp
“What a lucky girl you are!” congratulated Hugo, all unconscious. “I suppose he isn't by any chance interested in the theater?”
“Not that I know of,” said Louisaâat the door.
“Because if he
should
be,” called Hugo, “you might just drop a wordâat some tender moment, you knowâabout my Aristophanes in modern dress ⦔
4
“And when's it to be?” inquired Mr. Ross interestedly.
“Well, I'm not quite sure yet,” said Louisa. “But I can't see why we should wait.”
“Just give the word in good time,” said Mr. Ross, “and me and the boys'll have a whip-round. Congratulations againâthough I must say the place won't seem the same without you.”
It wasn't much of a place, Louisa's shop. Fortunately as a photographer of dogs she had no need of any chichi studio, her subjects posed either
en plein air
or in their own homes; in fact she hadn't a studio at all, but merely rented darkroom space off Mr. Ross at a highly un-chichi address in Soho. (Mr. Ross's subjects, though anthropoids, were also photographed
en plein air:
on the pavement outside Burlington House.) The accommodation suited Louisa very well, however, and she and Rossy had shared many a companionable cup of tea, as they were doing now, by the gas ring on the back landing.
“Not that we'd expect,” added Mr. Ross delicately, “to be
asked
⦔
“Good heavens, why not?” exclaimed Louisa. “You don't think I'm going to drop all my old friends?”
“If you're wise you will,” said Mr. Ross.
Louisa looked at him as she'd looked at Hugo: he stood up better to her scrutiny. He wasn't so very much the elder, his sharp-cut suit and pointed shoes were as much of a group-uniform as Hugo's dirty sweater and duffle coat; his oily black locks, styled to kill, inspired no confidence in the conventionally-minded. But his eyes were the sagacious eyes of the Jew; and he was genuinely concerned for her.
“When embarking on a new life,” said Mr. Ross earnestly, “make a clean break. You're marrying a well-to-do man, you're going to have a nice home: so okay, don't clutter it up with old pals. I'm speaking against my own interest, your society's been a real pleasure; but I've seen again and again how it doesn't do. My own sister,” said Mr. Ross unexpectedly, “married into a chain store. But do
I
drop in on 'em, Saturdays? Not me. It wouldn't answer.”
“Why not?” asked Louisa uneasily.
“Hampstead and Whitechapel. The grape 'n the grain. In your case, let's say, Knightsbridge 'nâ”
“Paddington,” supplied Louisa.
“That where you live? I didn't know,” said Mr. Ross. “I don't know, either, that you mayn't have some very classy friendsâ”
Louisa shook her head.
“Then take my advice, give 'em the go-by. Make a clean break.âAnd don't fret about me missing the champagne,” added Mr. Ross humorously, “just pour me another cup of char.”
5
Before so momentous an appointment Louisa naturally returned home to embellish her appearance; and met Number Ten on the stairs. He looked even seedier than usualâas though the mites were beginning to get at him too; also his vegetarian breath smelt unpleasantly of garlic. Without a pang, Louisa mentally gave Number Ten the go-by.
Without a pang, she felt, she could give Hugo the go-by. She could give them all the go-by, gladlyâthe whole shiftless bunch of men she was used to being fond of â¦
“Rossy's dead right,” thought Louisa. “It's time I made a clean break.”
Chapter Three
1
There could still be no stronger proof of her special temperament (which Louisa was now determined to repress, but Rome isn't built in a day) than the fact that she could enter Gladstone Mansions not only without dismay, but with positive exhilaration. Most women got the willies.
The first impression produced by the interior was of being underground. Seen from without, twelve massive stories reared almost tower-like; once past the great oak and ground-glass doors the catacomb illusion was complete. A cautious use of electricity left in shadow the high, coved, cavernous ceiling; on the walls, a paper originally representing marble now looked like wet granite. At intervals upon it naked skulls, like the trophies of cavemen, thrust up branching antlers or simple horns. Stray visitors from the provinces, peering uncertain through the heavy doors, felt that a Natural History Museum ought to be brighter. Only the specialist eye of a British club-manâand Louisa'sâat once recognized the entirely appropriate threshold to the most expensive flats in London, single gentlemen only.
When one rang for the lift, nothing happened.âThis was all right with Louisa, who had arrived a trifle early; in any case, she would no more have minded waiting than a scholar minds waiting in a library, or a botanist in a herbarium, or a kindergarten mistress in a show of infant handicraft. She had all the heads to look at. The legend beneath an
Oryx indiensis
, “Shot by Major Cart-wright-Jones, Himalayas 1885,” filled her with vicarious pleasure. (Though fond of animals, she was fonder still of majors, and besides had never seen an oryx on the hoof like a major in his boots.) A Colonel Hamlyn had bagged a wildebeeste, the Hon. C. P. Coe a moose; Louisa mentally tramped veldts with the one, slogged through tundra with the otherâshe was having, so to speak, a last orgyâand marveled as always at men's gratuitous heroism â¦
F. Pennon didn't appear to have shot anything. Even so, Louisa could well imagine some future nostalgia on his part, and easily promised herself to respect it.
An ancient clock coughed the half-hour. She rang again, and now in the lift shaft something happened. Iron vitals rumbled; machinery shuddered, ropes strained, wheels ground; it was like the birth of the Industrial Age. Rudimentary yet effectual, a great iron cage descended, groaned to a halt, and gaped. Casting a last affectionate thought towards Colonel Hamlyn, Major Jones and Mr.Coeâwhom no one else had thought of, let alone with affection, since about 1910âLouisa stepped hardily in.
“F. Pennon, third,” said Louisa. “What a splendid lot of heads!”
“The relatives don't claim 'em,” replied the lift man morosely.
His aged features, unused to expressing anything but apathy, readjusted themselves to express a dislike of small talk. Louisa admitted her error, recognized, and applauded, a complete absorption in the remarkable task of making six hundredweight of iron go up and down, and held her tongue.
Up they labored. An eye attuned to the cavern below instinctively sought, between the probably hand-forged bars, for some daubing of elk or mastodon on the lift shaft's naked brick. But it was bare as a pothole.âTo be ejected, at the Third, into civilization, nonetheless came as a shock, even though one was still, unmistakably, in Gladstone Mansions as well. The long narrow corridor still gave the impression of being underground, if only as in a mine; upon the walls, instead of horns and skulls, hung steel engravingsâbut each commemorating some disaster to British arms. (
The Charge of the Light Brigade
, the
Loss of the Royal George
, the
Retreat from Corunna
.) Louisa passed appreciatively between them, identified the door she sought, and used the
Death of Nelson
as a mirror to repowder her nose.
2
“F. Pennon?” inquired Louisa.
“Miss Datchett?” inquired the old manservant.
He might have been the lift man's twin brother; but Louisa was now too intent on her own affairs even to ask if they were related.âBehind him stretched a typical Gladstone Mansions sitting roomâfurnished apparently with sarcophagi, carpeted apparently with churchyard moss, the whole gloomy vista closed by curtains not absolutely black, but nonetheless suggestive of a first-class French funeral. The only points of brightness were the silver tea set ready on the tea table and the eager gleam in F. Pennon's eye as he hurried towards her out of the circumambiant gloom.
Louisa scrutinized him with natural interest. Her memory had been generally accurate: like a Sealyham he was broad through the chest and rather short-legged, but though not tall he was at least as tall as she was (and she could always wear flat heels), and his graying hair had exactly the springy roughness of a Sealyham's coat. (Louisa could easily imagine herself dropping a kiss on it at the breakfast table.) In age she judged him about nineâor rather sixtyâand though she could have wished him younger, he looked fit as a fiddle.
“My dear Louisa,” exclaimed F. Pennon, “how good of you to be so prompt!”
He had her hand even before the manservant stepped back, clasping it enthusiastically between his own.âWhere now was his reserve, his peculiar stiffness of address? All swept away, thought Louisa happily, in the joy of seeing her again!
“It's a pleasure,” said Louisa sincerely.
Indeed it was, to see him not only so spry and so delighted, but also, quite obviously, nervous. (He was far more nervous than Louisa; but then she already knew his fate.) He fussed. He fussed over finding her the most comfortable chair, and over the disposition of the tea things. (There were the scones, there was the honey, also a plummy cake shaped like an Edwardian toque.) He asked her to pour out. The weight of the teapot almost sprained her wrist, but how gladly she bore the slight twinge! “Family plate,” thought Louisaâfor not even Gladstone Mansions would supply solid silver. The sugar bowl alone could have been pawned for thirty bob. (How different a cup of char with Mr. Ross!) Merely to handle the solid silver sugar tongs, good for at least half a guinea, Louisa took three lumps.
“This is just,” sighed Louisa, “what I like.”
“You used to take lemon,” said F. Pennon anxiously.
There was lemon too, sliced wafer-thin in a silver shell. Not to disappoint him, Louisa added lemon. F. Pennon himself spooned honey onto her plate, beside the hot scone. Then he sat back and watched her eat with an expression of rapture.
“How well I remember,” he exclaimed, “that week at Cannes!”
“Oh, so do I!” said Louisa.
“We did, didn't we, get on rather well?âD'you think you could call me Freddy?”
“Easily,” said Louisaâshe was only too glad to find it wasn't F. for Ferdinand.
“You attracted me at once,” continued Freddy, in happy reminiscence. “I don't mind telling you I was a bit annoyedâbeing hit with that rollâthen I saw
you
at the table, and that's why I came over. What a thundering piece of luck it was!”
“For me too,” said Louisa.
“You really mean that?âI don't live here regularly, you know,” said F. Pennon, “I've a house as well, outside Bournemouth.”
The transition was abruptâhow nervous he was, poor F for Freddy!âbut Louisa grasped the implication at once. Wives being obviously tabu, in Gladstone Mansions, he wanted her to know about the house.âNot in Knightsbridge; outside Bournemouth. Mr. Ross however had scarcely erred.
“I can't imagine anything nicer,” said Louisa encouragingly.
“I hope you'll think so when you see it. That is, if you do see it. I want you to see it.âBut I'm going too fast,” said F. Pennon anxiously. “I'm rushing things. Have a slice of cake.”
Though she hadn't finished her scone, Louisa accepted it willingly. His nervousness was beginning to be infectious, and eating always steadied her.
“Not that I don't like it here too,” added Freddy, with a touch of wistfulness. “I do. I like it uncommonly.”
At the thought of all he was giving up for her, Louisa's heart quite meltedâparticularly as Gladstone Mansions was just the sort of place she liked herself. How different, the huge, solid room, from a divan-bedroom-bathroom-kitchenette-dinette! Even its gloom was tranquillizingâlike a thoroughly wet day when there is no question of going out. If Freddy's eye was wistful, so was Louisa's; but no one was ever less of a dog-in-the-manger.
“Why not keep it on?” she suggested kindly. “Then you could pop up to town on your own.”
“You really think I might?” exclaimed F. Pennon, brightening at once. “It wouldn't cause ⦠misunderstandings?âMy dear Louisa,” cried F. Pennon enthusiastically, “how right I've been about you! I knew I was right, even on so very brief an acquaintance as ours was at Cannes! You're the only woman, I tell you frankly, I've been able to think ofâ”
Louisa swallowed fast. She didn't mean to receive his proposal in form with her mouth full.
“âto turn to,” finished F. Pennon, “in a jam.”
For one momentâand alas, for one onlyâincredulity numbed Louisa's brain. The moment passed. After but the briefest pause, during which she resisted an impulse to dash the scone to the ground and grind it into the carpetâ
“Here we go again!” thought Louisa resignedly.
3
Resignedly she composed herself to listen. She also put another scone on her plate, beside the slice of cake, to make sure of supplies. Though where were now her rosy hopes, if she ate enough tea she could do without supper, and so be at least a meal up.
“Fire ahead,” said Louisa.
It was encouragement of a sort. At any rate it was encouragement enough for F. Pennon. He drew a deep, already assuaged breath.
“I don't suppose even you can realize,” he began earnestly, “how a man feelsâa man of my ageâwhen the woman he's worshiped for twenty years is at last free to marry him.”
Louisa sat perfectly still. The words were a final blow, and in the circumstances a shattering one. Yet what fidelity they exhibited! Twenty years! How different, such true devotion, thought Louisa, from the untidy amours of her familiar circle! Chagrined as she was, she felt her heart melt.
“Perhaps not,” she said kindly. “Tell me.”