So Not a Hero (13 page)

He released the controls and screamed, pounding his fists on the console in front of him. I shook my head and looked around at the damage our little meeting had caused. The masonry on the front of City Hall was cracked and broken, but that had been done before I got involved. The Lexus I’d been knocked into was pretty much a total loss. Hopefully the owner had insurance that covered Acts of Heroes. Several citizens had dared to return to the scene and were snapping pictures of the fallen mecha. Others were tapping on their phones at a furious pace, all trying to be the first to break the story on social media.

The whine of the EAPF transport lifters yanked me from my thoughts. I glanced up at the descending vehicle and almost took off running. Old habits were harder to break than I’d assumed. Instead of fleeing, I crossed my arms over my chest and waited for the authorities to take over.

When the transport touched down, a half dozen agents in reinforced body armor poured out of the side door. Two of them began erecting force field generators around the scene while another pair ordered the onlookers back a good distance from the ruined mecha. The remaining two were using a cutting torch to break into the cockpit.

I walked back to my bag and picked it up.

A grey sedan pulled up beside me and the siren barked at me twice. The door opened and a deliciously handsome man climbed out and stood beside the vehicle. He was dressed in a dark blue suit with a red tie and had a Detective’s badge clipped to his belt. He looked around the scene of the crime and then turned his gaze to me and pointed a finger.

“Wait right there,” he said as he closed the door and started walking away. “I want to have a word with you.”

I sighed and sat down on the sidewalk. If I got detained by the EAPF for breaking my parole – even if I was doing my job – Greg was going to be unhappy. The officer spoke to the two agents putting up the barrier and then walked over to the two still trying to get to the pilot. After a few moments, the one holding the torch looked at the detective and shook his head. I sighed again, this time as I stood back up. At this rate, I would never make it back in time for the press conference. I walked over to the mecha, holding my hands up when one of the agent’s hands went to his sidearm.

“Please, allow me.” I said. Then I grabbed the side of the cockpit and ripped it loose, revealing the criminal surprise inside. I set the top down and brushed off my hands. “There you go.”

The four agents looked at me warily and then to the detective.

He pointed at the man in the machine and then to the transport craft. “Take this piece of crap to The Shack and book him on multiple counts of enhanced terrorism, property damage, resisting arrest, and making a big-ass mess.” The uniformed officers saluted and then hauled the perp out of the cockpit and carried him towards the open door of the transport.

The detective turned back to me and held out his hand. The smile he flashed in my direction made my knees weak and my chest feel way too tight. I also wondered what he thought about my new haircut, but then realized that he didn’t have a before image for comparison. “Kurt Braddock,” he said as that dazzling grin widened. “Thank you for your assistance, Miss Hashimoto.”

I held onto his hand and blinked a couple of times before settling into a simple clueless stare. After a couple of heartbeats, my language center rebooted and I was capable of speech again. “You know who I am?” I let go of his grip and instantly missed the touch.

He nodded, giving me a wink that made my toes tingle. “Yes. Mister Manpower is always keeping the department informed of any new powered-criminal threats.”

“Oh,” I said as the pleasant tingle faded and a lump of melancholy settled in my stomach. I looked down at the cracked sidewalk and wondered why I couldn’t have invisibility or teleportation as an extra power. “Well, I am currently on – ”

Detective Braddock interrupted my explanation. “He also lets us know when there are new heroes operating in the city. As I said, thank you for your help.”

Hero? Mister Manpower actually called the police and told them I was a hero now? I’d only been accepted as a probationary member of the Good Guys yesterday. “When?”

“When what?” He asked.

I looked over at the transport and then back to those light blue eyes. “When did Mister Manpower tell you I was a … hero?” Just saying the word out loud to a member of the EAPF made my tongue feel funny.

The detective closed one eye and looked up at the sky with the other. “Let’s see. It was two days ago, when he brought in the Brickwall Gang for processing. He said that the former villain Crushette had given him a hand and that you were going to be doing the hero thing from now on.”

Two days ago? I hadn’t even made a decision about joining at that time. I’d still been wrestling with my limited choices about where I was going to sleep. Had Greg known then I was going to accept his offer? Or was it some wishful thinking on his part that just happened to come true? “Yeah, I guess I am.”

He laughed softly and I realized that it wasn’t just a handsome face or nice body that was making me attracted to him. It was his personality as well. Friendly and understanding. He was an officer of the law casually talking to a girl as if she wasn’t a former supervillain. He wasn’t guarded or suspicious standing this close to someone of my reputation. He was judging me on what he’d heard from Mister Manpower and seen with his own eyes. So caught up was I in the unfamiliar revelation that I missed his next question. “I’m sorry?” I asked, hoping I didn’t come off as spacey.

He tilted his head slightly to the side, regarding me with that easy grin. “I asked if you had a new name. Assuming, of course, that you won’t still go by Crushette.”

I shook my head and then shrugged. “Haven’t really got around to that yet. Between getting settled in and designing a uniform, the code name sort of got overlooked.”

“Well, I’m sure you’ll come up with something.” He reached into his jacket and pulled out a card. “If you need anything, my number’s on the front.” He smiled that smile again and walked around to the driver’s side of the sedan. He opened the door and looked at me over the top of the car. “It was very nice meeting you, Miss Hashimoto.”

“It’s Karen.” I returned his smile. “Nice meeting you as well, Detective Braddock,” I said and turned to walk away.

“Call me Kurt”, he called after me. “Uh, Karen?”

I turned back to him. “Yes?”

His cheeks were a little pink. “You mentioned you had a uniform. You might want to wear it more often if there’s a chance you might find trouble.”

I arched a brow at the odd suggestion and then nodded. “I’ll take that under consideration.”

He gave me another smile, got back into the car, and pulled away. I shook my head and headed back to towards the tower when the transport behind me fired up its VTOL and lifted off the ground. The turbine downwash scattered dust, paper, and my hair in little swirling patterns and I was instantly aware of two facts.

The first was that Detective Braddock seemed to be flirting with me just a bit. The casual glances. The warm and inviting smile. The way he stood near me. All of that sent unfamiliar signals running around in my head and made me feel warm and flush all over. Martin had never bothered with flirting. He’d always been direct and to the point. I found the experience pleasurable.

Fact Number Two was the realization that when the psycho in the powered mecha had blasted me through the car, the seat of my yoga pants had taken serious damage. Unfortunately, I hadn’t been naked underneath. So while my Secret from Victoria was completely undamaged, the ass of my pants was missing and the air from the hovering transport was blowing across my panty-clad butt. Which explained the good detective’s parting comment.

Just my luck to meet a really nice – and hot – guy and end up flashing my underwear as a first impression. I hoped at least he’d enjoyed the view. I held my bag behind me to deter any other viewers of my wardrobe malfunction and quickly made my way back home.

CHAPTER 8: THE ‘D’ IN DYSFUNCTIONAL

I managed to make it back to the tower with only two car horns and three cat-calls worth of appreciation for the gaping hole in the seat of my pants. When I crossed the lobby to the elevator, Joelle paused in her duties just long enough to give me a raised brow before a slight smirk formed on her face. Then she went back to doing whatever it was she did when she wasn’t answering phones, filling appointments, or ordering new furniture and appliances to replace ones destroyed by superhero catfights.

I stepped off the elevator and immediately headed towards my room as fast as possible, praying that I wouldn’t run into anyone else before I could change. Unfortunately, I only made it halfway before Manpower’s voice echoed from a speaker in the wall.

“Karen, would you mind joining us in the Briefing Room?”

I pressed the glowing blue button beside the unit. “Uh, can you give me about fifteen minutes? I sorta need to get cleaned up.”

The reverberating voice responded. “Now, if you please. This won’t take a moment.”

I walked into the briefing room to see the rest of the team seated around the table, already in uniform. From the looks on their faces, they had been in the middle of a tense discussion before I arrived. The extremely displeased expression on Rocket indicated that the subject of their disagreement had been moi. I stopped in the doorway, keeping my hands behind me, and forced my mouth to smile. “Hey, everyone. What’s going on?”

Alexis hopped up and rushed over to me with a big smile on her face. “Wow, your hair looks awesome.” Then the smile faltered and a frown appeared, accompanied by a wrinkled brow. “Did you know you had broken glass in it?” She reached out and touched my arm. Suddenly, the constant pull of increased density – to which I’d long become accustomed – vanished. Bits of car debris fell through my now-intangible form and tinkled on the tile floor. After a couple of seconds, the teen removed her hand and I was solid again. And more than a little awed. “There,” she said, “all better. What happened?”

Manpower held up his hand. “We can discuss your adventure in hairstyling at a later time. Right now, we need to discuss a few things before we face the public.”

I successfully navigated to the closest empty chair without flashing anyone and sat down so quickly that even the dura-steel frame groaned. Resting my hands on the table, I swept my eyes across the faces of the others. “Why do I get the feeling that the something is specific to me?”

“Because it is,” Darla answered. Then she gestured to Manpower.

“We were discussing how much about you should be revealed to the press.” He looked around the table and then back to me. “Some of us think it would be a bad idea to state that you used to be the villain known as Crushette.” His eyes moved over to Robert and Darla for a brief moment. “And some think otherwise.”

Captain Awesome nodded. “I think it would be best to not say anything and let you dazzle the public with your …abilities.” He winked and gave me a flirty grin.

Manpower shook his head. “While I don’t completely agree with Richard,” he said. “I feel that announcing the addition of a notorious ex-criminal to our roster, rather than an already established hero, might not go over well. I would rather the focus be on the fact that the team is back to full power and not your past.”

I looked at Omega-Girl and Rocket. “Can I assume that you two would prefer that my criminal history be addressed?”

Rocket nodded emphatically, but Darla gave a little shrug. “Only in the interest of full disclosure,” she said.

“I think the public has a right to know who you used to be and that there is a risk in having you on the team,” Rocket spat and pointed his finger at me. “Even if you really are reformed, people should know that they can expect to be saved by someone from whom they used to hide in fear.”

“I see.” I turned to Alexis and Daniel. “Where do you stand?”

The teen looked down at the table. “I don’t think we should say anything,” she said. “Let them find out on their own.”

Power Brain pushed his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose. “I’m afraid that secrets have a way of creating a backlash. I don’t think we should look like we are deliberately hiding your past.” He frowned and looked away. “I’m sorry, Karen.”

“So, what is the verdict? Are we telling or not?” I asked.

Manpower looked at me. “I think this decision has to be yours.”

I sat silently for a few moments as a multitude of reaction scenarios flowed through my thoughts. Then I shrugged and ran my hand through my newly-shorn hair. “It’ll probably piss off a bunch of people that you guys recruited me, but I think Daniel is right that it will be even worse if it looks like we’re trying to hide who I
used
to be.” I stared directly at Robert. “Emphasis on the verb tense.” The flyer rolled his eyes and looked away.

Manpower nodded. “It’s settled, then. Full disclosure.” He held up his finger. “However, we are not going to turn this event into a justification for our decision. We’ll simply say the former Crushette is now a hero operating under a new name. Which, by the way, we’ll need to decide on before two o’clock.”

“Okay,” I said. “Is there anything else? Because I would really like to shower before my public grilling.”

Manpower shook his head. “I don’t think so. Other than a codename. We can do that after you get cleaned up. Let’s reconvene in an hour.”

Daniel leaned over to tap me on the arm, a rather pleased smile on his face. “There’s something for you in your room. I hope you like it.” A little color slipped out of the collar of his lab coat and up onto his face when I returned his smile.

“Thanks.”

I stood up and headed towards my room. Two steps along the way, I heard Alexis gasp, Darla snicker, and Awesome whistle. I’d completely forgotten about my pants. Without turning around to explain, I ran off down the hallway to the privacy of my room. I closed the door behind me before slipping out of the pants, holding them up to survey the damage. The entire bottom was gone, including part of the upper thighs. Which meant that my
entire
ass had been on display. Groaning, I threw the ruined clothing across the room and shook my head.

The way things were going, I wondered if I should just do battle against evil in my underwear.

I glanced over to the bed and spotted Daniel’s surprise: my newly fabricated uniform and accessories, lying on the bed waiting for me. I stepped over and ran my fingers along the front of the black and yellow suit. The material felt like spandex—and probably fit like it—but there was an underlying toughness I could detect in the fibers.

I left the costume where it was and headed into the shower. Once under the spray, I turned the knob to the hottest possible setting and scrubbed away remnants of my encounter in front of City Hall. Alexis’ little trick had saved me the trouble of picking out the metal and glass bits one by one.

After the quick bath, I pulled on a thong and went to work getting myself into the uniform. Daniel had promised it would be a perfect fit, and he hadn’t been lying. It hugged every curve and crevice like a second skin, yet didn’t feel the slightest bit constricting. There was hidden pocket on the hip for holding something credit-card sized and a layer of extra-soft padding in the chest that helped with comfortable support for the girls. My nipple comment had obviously struck a nerve.

I pulled on the matching boots and gloves and walked around the room, appraising how I looked in the mirror. “Not bad.” I said to my reflection. “Not bad at all.” I did one last check to make sure everything was where it should be before rejoined the others, still sitting at the table.

I strode into the room, took a deep breath, and smiled. Planting my hands on my hips, I tossed back my head in what I hoped would be a heroic pose. "So, how do I look?"

"I love it," Phantasm said with a grin bigger than my own.

Omega-Girl shrugged. "It’s acceptable."

Manpower nodded slowly. "Very professional," he said.

Rocket wisely kept his mouth shut.

Captain Awesome stared for a few seconds and then turned to look at Daniel. "That doesn't look like any of my suggestions."

Daniel swallowed and looked from the leader to me and back. "Well, uh, Karen requested something a bit more … modest."

Richard threw his hands in the air. "For the love of Pete, Daniel. Full-body cover is one thing. But you could have at least put in a cleavage window. How else is she supposed to distract the bad guys?"

I blinked and shook my head, pointing at Omega-Girl’s bathing suit outfit. "Darla’s uniform doesn't have a cleavage window."

Awesome nodded. "Of course it doesn’t. Her boobs are too small to be an effective diversion.” He rubbed his hand over his own bottom, nodding to the blonde. “However, her butt is perfect.”

“What the hell, Richard?” Darla yelled as she stood up. The action revealed her aforementioned barely-covered ass.

Greg stood up and looked at them both. “Enough. We’re going to be standing in front of the world in about twenty-five minutes. Could we possibly act like the well-structured team of heroes that the general public
thinks
we are?”

Darla plopped back down and crossed her arms over her chest. “Fine,” she huffed.

“Okay,” Manpower said, turning to me. “You’ve got a new look. Now you need a new name. Any thoughts?”

Captain Awesome stood up and walked around the table to me. He didn't even bother to hide the way his gaze generously appraised the second-skin fit of the black and yellow outfit. "I do. Uber-Girl."

I gave him a hard look. "Try again."

Power Brain tapped a on the screen in his hand and then shook his head. "No dice. Some hero in Berlin is already using that one."

"Besides,” I said. “I'm not going by anything that has 'girl' attached to it. It's demeaning."

"Hey!" Omega-Girl yelled, glaring at me from her seat.

I responded with the sweetest smile and my most Southern drawl. "But it works for you,
Sugar
."

She returned the saccharine smile and held up a hand that had an energy halo crackling around it.  “I have something else that works.”

Manpower held up his hands. “Ladies, you can pound on each other at another time. In the training room,” he added, looking directly at Darla.

“How about Wonder Lady?” Alexis offered.

Richard snapped his fingers. “Oh! Bullet Babe!”

“Bullet Babe?” The rest of us said in unison.

He nodded. “You’re fast and make holes in things when you hit them. Sounds like a bullet to me.” Then he pointed at my chest, finger bouncing up and down. “The Babe part speaks for itself.”

“I’m going to make a hole in you now,” I said as I took a step towards him.

“Knockout,” Daniel said, still looking at his tablet.

I stopped stalking towards Captain Misogyny and turned to look at the team genius. “Knockout?” I asked.

“Uh, yeah. I mean, it makes sense, right?” He tapped on the screen and swiped his finger back and forth. “Like a homonym.”

Awesome looked as if he’d just been asked to prove the Unified Field Theorem. “Like a what?”

“Same word, two meanings.” I explained. Then I arched a brow at Brain. “You think I should pick a name that encompasses both my abilities and my appearance?”

“Yeah.” Then he frowned and the blush swallowed the rest of his complexion. “I mean, not trying to objectify you or anything like that.”

I narrowed my eyes at him for a second and then smiled. “Not bad. I like it.”

The table chirped and Daniel looked down at it. The frown that formed on his face told me that I was out of luck. “Already in use.”

“You may be stuck with Crushette,” Rocket said with more than a little glee.

I sighed. “That’s not happening.” I walked around the table and leaned against it next to Daniel. The reinforced metal groaned slightly but didn’t act like it was going to collapse. “Back to the drawing board?”

He glanced at me with a disappointed look. Then his face took on a curious expression. “Wait. We can abbreviate it. You know, use the initials.”

“K.O?” Captain Awesome asked.

Daniel nodded. “Well, I was thinking that since you’re half-Japanese, we could put a heritage spin on it. Call you Kayo. Spelled ‘k-a-y-o’.”

I thought about it for a moment and then gave a little shake of my head. “It doesn’t mean anything in Japanese.” Though it was rather close to my birth name.

“I think the idea is that is
sounds
like a Japanese name. Kay-O.” Darla said.

I stood there thinking for a minute or two and then decided that Kayo wasn’t any worse than ‘Crushette’. “Why not?” I looked over at Mister Manpower. “Kayo it is.”

He stared at me for a moment and then smiled, pulling his omni-plex goggles down onto his face. “Wonderful. Well, Kayo, ready to meet the world?”

The butterflies settled a little bit and I grinned despite myself. I was still nervous about what was to come, but I was beginning to feel like I could pull this off. “Why not? Let’s do this.”

Alexis slipped her arm through mine, giving me a little hug. “Welcome to the Good Guys, Kayo.”