So Long At the Fair (51 page)

When Oliver and Maria had finished the lemonade Abbie replaced the beakers in the basket. Oliver was getting to his feet again. Looking out at the receding waterline he said, ‘I don’t suppose the tide will be back for a long time yet, will it?’

‘I’m afraid not, darling. There’ll be no more bathing today.’

He turned to Maria. ‘Shall we go for another walk, Maria? But the other way this time.’ He pointed off down the beach in the opposite direction.

Maria looked at Abbie for an answer. Abbie nodded. ‘Yes, but don’t go too far away. And stay within my sight so that I can keep an eye on you.’

Already Oliver was reaching out for Maria’s hand. ‘Come on, Maria.’

‘And keep your hat on,’ Abbie called after him.

Smiling after them, Abbie lay with her chin on her arm, watching as they wandered along the beach, every now and again stopping to look at something in the sand. Oliver could come to little harm here. Maria was a sensible girl and with the tide going out the beach offered no intrinsic dangers. They couldn’t get lost, either, as they were now familiar with the spot where they had made their little settlement. They had chosen it on the first day – a place relatively secluded and sheltered from the breeze – and had come back to it nearly every day.

Abbie watched the pair for a minute longer then closed her eyes. From further off she heard the shouts of children playing, from above the crying of gulls, while from behind, beyond the promenade, came the distant sounds of carriages and horses’ hooves. At her side her book lay forgotten.

Louis came into her mind – as he had so many times since leaving Frome. She felt that the night he had come in following the death in childbirth of Mrs Tippet and her baby son might well have marked something of a turning point in their lives. While they had not got back to any degree of intimacy, still they had begun to develop once more a little closeness, a little more trust – evident in so many things that passed between them. From then until she and Oliver had left for their vacation they had had ten days together – and as those days had passed Abbie had become more and more aware that perhaps after all they might be able to find some lasting common ground that would enable them to live together in some degree of harmony.

At this time on a Friday, she reflected, Louis would most likely be out on house calls. She had a sudden picture of him as he had been at the station on the Wednesday morning of their departure. When he had picked Oliver up in his arms to say goodbye the child had clung to him, arms tight around his neck. ‘Daddy,’ he had said, ‘I want you to come with us. Why won’t you come with us?’ And Louis had replied that he had to work, that he could not leave his patients. Later, when the train was in, Abbie had been at the open carriage window, facing Louis as he stood on the platform.

‘Now you two have a good time,’ he had said. ‘I know it’ll do you good to have a change of scene.’

‘Yes . . .’

‘And stay as long as you like.’ He smiled. ‘Within reason.’

‘Yes, within reason.’ A pause. ‘I’ll drop you a line in the next day or two. Tell you how we’re getting on.’

‘I’ll look forward to hearing. Look after yourselves.’

‘We will.’

The whistle blew and the train began to move, and with Oliver standing waving at her side, Abbie watched until Louis was no longer in sight.

Since their arrival in the resort Abbie had written to Louis several times, reporting on their pastimes and conveying to him affectionate and newsy messages from Oliver. He had written back expressing happiness at their continuing pleasure.

Now, lying in the warm air, Abbie thought back over the time of their stay at the resort. Since leaving Frome she had felt almost tangibly the weight of her problems falling away. She had of course found much contentment in Oliver’s happiness, but it went deeper than that. With the passing days she had found a growing sense of peace. Being so far from the scene of recent conflicts, perhaps she was seeing things more clearly, getting them in perspective. And viewed so, the problems seemed somehow less potent than they had been. Most vital of all, they no longer appeared to be insurmountable.

As far as her life with Louis was concerned, she knew she had either to accept it or reject it. There could be no compromises. She must commit herself to her marriage and all that went with it – or turn her back upon it. And she could not contemplate the latter. For one thing it would mean that she would lose Oliver – which was unthinkable. Louis had made it clear that he wouldn’t give up his son and she couldn’t blame him for that. Besides, Oliver’s life in Frome was a good life. He had love, security and comfort – all that a child could need.

She sighed. Raising her head, she looked out over the water and saw near the horizon the darker shape of a steamer going by. This time, this place, she reminded herself, did not constitute her reality. They had been here over two weeks and soon she must start to think about returning home – which would mean that choices and decisions had to be made. But in truth, she realized, she did not really have a choice. Whatever her hopes might once have been there were no options available to her now. Arthur could no longer be a part of her life. He had made his commitments – and he could not give them up. There was nothing for it but to accept her present situation and make the best of it. And after all, her situation could, with effort and thought, bring her some happiness. She had a comfortable home and wanted for nothing materially. Even more important, she had a young son whom she adored. Yes, she determined that from now she would make the best of everything as far as she could. Louis was a good man and whatever lack there might be in their relationship she could not in all honesty see that it was due to any fault of his. The lack was in herself; contrary to her expectations, she had simply found it impossible to return his love.

From some distant place came the sound of a clock striking the hour of three. When Oliver and Maria returned it would be time to start back to the hotel for tea. Afterwards Oliver would sleep for an hour and Abbie could indulge herself in a soothing bath. She stretched on the rug. Her bare feet, outside the umbrella’s shade, were warm in the sun.

While Abbie lay relaxing, Oliver and Maria, fifty yards along the beach, were attempting to build a sandcastle. They had only their hands as tools, however, and the task was not easy.

As they worked there came from the promenade a familiar voice:

‘Oliver . . .’

Oliver and Maria turned to the sound and a moment later Oliver was giving a wild yell of delight. ‘Daddy! Daddy!’ At the same time Louis climbed over the rail and jumped from the promenade onto the sand. Moments later he was striding forward and sweeping his son up in his arms. He held him close for a second or two, then set him down and crouched before him.

‘Well, look at my little boy! He’s the colour of an Indian!’

‘Daddy,’ Oliver said, ‘we didn’t know you were coming.’

‘No,’ Louis replied, ‘neither did I until a couple of days ago. Then I decided I had to come and see how you were.’ He gave him another hug. ‘Have you missed me? Or have you been having so much fun that you’ve hardly given me a thought?’ Without waiting for an answer, he turned to Maria, who stood shyly a yard or two away, and asked whether she was having a good time. She replied that she was enjoying herself very much.

‘Good.’ He turned back to Oliver. ‘Well – let’s go and find your mother, shall we?’

Abbie, lying down, heard the excited sound of Oliver’s voice calling to her, and opening her eyes she saw him running across the sand towards her. In the same moment she saw Louis and Maria walking a few yards behind.

‘Look, Mama!’ Oliver cried, ‘I’ve got Daddy here! Daddy’s come to see us.’

As Louis reached her side Abbie sat up, looked up at him and smiled. ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘so I see.’

That evening after Oliver had been put to bed Louis went in to say goodnight. Sitting on a small stool beside the bed he leaned over, looking down into his sleepy eyes.

‘You’re a tired little chap, aren’t you?’ he murmured.

Oliver yawned. ‘Just a little.’

As Louis adjusted the sheet about his chin, Oliver took hold of his hand. ‘Daddy, did you know that I can swim?’

‘Yes, your mama told me. What a clever boy you are.’

‘Mama taught me. Now I swim every day. And every day I can swim a little further.’

‘That’s wonderful. I’m very proud of you.’

‘Maria can’t swim yet. Next year I shall teach her. Can you swim, Daddy?’

‘Yes, I can swim. Not well, but a little.’

‘Tomorrow we can go swimming together, can’t we?’

‘I’m sorry, Ollie, but I’m afraid I’ve got to get back.’

‘But haven’t you come to stay with us?’

‘Not for long. I have to go back home tomorrow.’

‘So soon?’ Oliver gave a little groan.

‘I don’t want to go, but there’s nothing for it. My patients have to be looked after.’

Oliver clicked his tongue. ‘They always do. But you won’t go without seeing me in the morning, will you?’

‘Of course not.’ Louis clapped a hand to his forehead in a melodramatic gesture. ‘I’ll forget my head next – I brought you a little present and forgot all about it.’

Oliver at once became more wakeful. ‘Where is it?’

‘In my case in my room. I haven’t unpacked it yet.’

‘Oh – can I have it, please?’

‘It’s too late now. You go to sleep and you shall have it tomorrow.’

‘Oh, can’t I have it now?’

‘No, wait till tomorrow, there’s a good boy.’

‘What is it? Tell me what it is.’

‘Wait and see.’ Louis leaned down and kissed him. ‘Goodnight now, my dear.’

When he had gone from the room Abbie went in to say her goodnights.

‘Daddy brought me a present,’ Oliver said as she bent to him.

‘Did he now? And what did he bring you?’

‘I don’t know. I haven’t seen it yet.’

‘Oh, so you’ve a surprise waiting for you. I love surprises.’

‘I do too.’ A wide yawn. ‘Daddy’s going back home tomorrow, Mama. Did you know that?’

‘Yes. He can’t spare the time to stay longer.’

‘Because of his patients.’

‘Yes, because of his patients.’

A little pause. ‘When are we going home, Mama – you and Maria and I?’

‘Well,’ Abbie shrugged, ‘I haven’t decided. Why?’

‘I was thinking – can we go back tomorrow with Daddy?’

‘Aren’t you enjoying yourself here?’

‘Yes, but – I want to go back home. Can we?’

Abbie paused for a moment before answering, ‘Well – we’ll see.’

With Maria sharing Oliver’s room and watching over him, Abbie and Louis went downstairs to dine. Abbie was wearing a new gown, which she had bought in the town just the day before. It was of lavender cotton, decorated with bows and pleated frills. With it she wore a fine lace shawl draped over her shoulders.

When they had consulted the menu and Louis had given their orders Abbie said, ‘I must say you gave us a surprise, appearing like that.’

Louis smiled. ‘I guessed I would. But I got tired of being on my own, so I decided to come and see you both if I could find a locum. And I managed to, so here I am. Fortunately the hotel had a room for me.’

‘How did you know where to find us this afternoon?’

‘I learned at the hotel that you had gone off to the beach, so I just kept looking.’

‘Oliver was so thrilled to see you.’

He smiled, pleased. ‘Yes, I know.’

‘What time are you leaving tomorrow?’

‘There’s a train just after ten thirty which I’d like to catch if I can.’

When dinner was over they moved into the lounge where they were served coffee.

Louis said, ‘Well, you’ve told me all about Oliver – how he’s been getting on. What about you? Have you been all right?’

She shrugged. ‘Oh – I’ve been well.’

‘Have you enjoyed yourself?’

‘Very much.’

‘Good. You look extremely well. The sea air suits you. Or perhaps it’s a little more than the sea air.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘You’re looking more – relaxed.’

When their coffee cups were empty Louis suggested they take a stroll and they went out into the balmy evening air. They walked along the promenade a little apart, and eventually came to a stop and stood at the rail looking over the beach. The waters of the Bristol Channel looked dark as ink, a darkness broken here and there by the twinkling lights of ships. The scene was very peaceful.

Into the silence Louis said, ‘I’ve missed you both.’

‘Have you?’ She kept her eyes on the view before her.

‘The house has seemed very empty. Not only without Ollie’s presence, but without yours, too.’

She nodded and gave a little sigh. ‘I’ve been doing some thinking while I’ve been here. About you and me.’

‘Yes?’ He waited for her to go on.

‘Somehow – somehow in Frome I couldn’t seem to think straight, but while I’ve been here things have made a little more sense to me.’ She turned to him. He seemed very tall standing beside her. ‘I’m sorry for what I’ve done.’

‘Oh – Abbie . . .’ His hand moved and rested on hers as she held the rail.

‘You’ve been very good about – so much,’ she said. ‘And I think I understand why – why you – sought consolation elsewhere. I can’t blame you for it.’

His hands moved to her shoulders, turning her to face him. His eyes were very steady upon her. ‘Abbie,’ he said, ‘can’t we put it all behind us – all that melancholy business? Can’t we make another start – for all our sakes?’

She nodded. ‘I’d like to. I’d like to try.’

‘Do you mean it?’

‘Yes.’

He let out a deep sigh and drew her towards him. ‘Abbie, it’s what I’ve wanted to hear. You n’t imagine how much.’

She gave a nod. ‘All I can promise is to try my very best to make it work between us.’