CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO
COJO MILLS
Merlin was on the way home, and I wanted to look extra nice for him. I took a hot shower and swept my hair into an updo. I went into the bedroom and oiled my body down. I didn’t know if his captain would come in, so I wanted to put on something under my clothes that I could strip down to.
I had a red teddy that would be perfect for the occasion. I was very meticulous about my clothing and knew where every item was placed, but I could not find it to save my soul. I pulled out every drawer and sorted through each item in them, but I couldn’t find it.
“That’ s so strange.” After wasting a good fifteen minutes, I decided on a white teddy. I liked the way my chocolate skin contrasted against the white. I pulled on a pair of jeans over the teddy and put on a shirt to cover it. I decided against a bra. My boobs were feeling extra heavy and wearing a bra for eight hours was enough for me.
I was in the living room when Merlin came through the door. I launched my body toward him and damn near knocked him down.
“Damn, baby, I haven’t been gone that long.”
“I know, but when you left it scared me so bad, I just couldn’t help myself.
“Shit scared me too.” He gently pulled me from his chest and turned toward the door. “Babe, let me introduce you to the person who is responsible for getting me out.”
I didn’t even wait until he finished his introduction before I was rushing forward to greet and thank his captain for her help. “Thank you so much for helping my husband. I don’t know what I would do without him.”
Captain Jamison said, “You are very welcome. He’s a good guy, and I can tell he loves you.”
My heart swelled with her comment. It was one thing for him to tell me that, but it was something entirely different when a stranger said it. Without warning, I burst out in tears. My hormones had been raging, and I wasn’t in control of anything. Not my bladder, not my emotions, or my crazy-ass brother-in-law.
“Sweetheart, why are you crying?” Merlin had a terrified look on his face, but I couldn’t make him feel better when I was raging out of control.
“I don’t know, I wailed. I walked toward my husband and wrapped my arms around his neck. I needed him to hold me and reassure me that everything was going to be all right.
“It’ s going to be okay, baby. Just calm down.” He stroked my back, and I began to feel better.
In fact, I began to feel ashamed for acting out in front of his captain. I pulled away from his arms to face her. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to carry on this way in front of you.”
“Girl, shut up, I was pregnant too. I know what you are dealing with.” She came to me with open arms, and I cried on her shoulder too.
There was a heavy knock at the door.
“I’ll get it.” Merlin went to the door and opened it while still looking over his shoulder at us.
Two white men wearing the cheapest suits I’d ever seen were standing there with their guns trained on Merlin. I gasped and my eyes bucked.
“What?” Merlin asked when he saw of my expression. He turned toward the door.
“Merlin Mills,” the white man with the Looney Tunes–printed tie said, “get on the ground and place your hands behind your back.”
That’ s when I noticed the badges clipped to their waist.
Merlin laughed. “We just got that little situation taken care of.”
The guy with the tie charged Merlin and knocked him to the ground. The other guy kept his gun pointed.
“I said get on the ground.” He put his knee in Merlin’s back and pulled out a set of handcuffs.
“My captain is standing right there,” Merlin said. “Ask her.”
“Merlin Mills,” the man said while cuffing him, “you’re under arrest for attempted murder and arson.”
My eyes damn near jumped out of my head. Just when I thought things could get no worse, they did.
CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE
GAVIN MILLS
“You ready to go?”
“Damn, don’t be rushing me.” I was aggravated. I never should have promised to meet up with the trick. Now I was mad at him and myself.
“I ain’t rushing you, boo.”
My stomach turned a little. I started to check him right there at the club, but I didn’t want to draw any attention to us. “What’ s your name?” I was stalling, trying to figure out exactly what I was going to do.
“It’s Wayne.” He didn’t ask for my name, and if he had, I would have most definitely told him a lie.
“All right, Wayne, let’s bounce.” I followed him out of the club.
“My car is right across the street.” He walked off, and I got in my car to follow him. His arrogance reminded me of Merlin and it made my blood boil.
I followed him to his house, which wasn’t too far from the club.
“Do you want a drink?” Wayne asked as he left the living room and went into the kitchen.
“I could use a beer.” I looked around his modest apartment. From the looks of things, Wayne did okay for himself. His apartment didn’t have that run-down look that mine had and that only made me madder. “I like your crib.”
“Thanks,” Wayne said as he handed me a beer. He took the top off of his bottle and took a generous gulp. He appeared to be nervous as he walked over to the television and turned it on. I took a seat on the sofa. “So what do you do?”
“I’m a pharmacist.”
I didn’t expect that. I thought he was going to tell me that he was into interior decorating or some other gay shit like that. “Oh, yeah, that’s good.”
He sat next to me on the sofa. I got nervous.
“You are really cute. Do you dance?” Wayne said as he scooted over closer to me.
“No, my talents are limited to pouring liquor.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” Wayne said suggestively. He ran his hand up my thigh, and I had to suppress the urge to punch him in his fucking face.
“Hey, I’ve got to use your bathroom.” I jumped up from the sofa.
“It’s down the hall on the right, sweetie.”
I took my time in the bathroom, looking through his medicine cabinet and underneath the sink. I was surprised to find a bottle of Rohypnol.
Rohypnol was the date rape drug. I flipped open the top and poured out two tablets into my hand. I was formulating a plan in my mind. I casually walked back into the living room. I needed to find a way to get the pills into his beer. “Can I get a glass of water?” I asked.
“Why, you trying to kill your high with water?”
“Nigga, I ain’t killing shit, I just need some water.”
Wayne went into the kitchen and got my water, and I was able to slip the pills into his open bottle of beer.
I sipped at the water and drowned the beer waiting for the pills to take effect on Wayne.
“Can I go and get comfortable?” Wayne asked.
“Sure, do your thing. I’m going to go into the kitchen and make me a drink.”
“That’ s cool, I’ll be out in a minute.” He was shaking his hips as if he were enticing me. Little did he know, I had no interest in what he had to offer. I just wanted to teach his ass a lesson that he wouldn’t soon forget.
I had settled onto the couch and was watching the news when Wayne came out of the bedroom. He was naked and appeared to be very proud of his tiny dick. I almost laughed when I saw him appear in the doorway. He struck a pose.
“Where are you clothes, bro?”
“We both know what you’re here for. Just tell me how much it’s going to cost me.”
“I don’t get down like that. Put a towel around your ass. I get with men who I connect with mentally.”
“Wow, I’m sorry.” He turned around and went back into the bathroom to get a towel.
I stifled a laugh. Little did he know, I wouldn’t get with him no matter how big his mind was.
Wayne walked back into the room, and I could tell that he was embarrassed.
“Don t worry about it man, I get this all the time. I like to know who I’m sleeping with so I take my time.”
He picked up his beer and drank the rest of it. He did exactly what I wanted him to do. All I had to do was wait. He sat on the sofa with me, and we watched the news. However, I could not sit still when I heard the top story. My brother Merlin had been arrested for attempted arson. Under normal circumstances, I would have been happy that he was out of the way, but he being charged for a crime that I had committed.
The news was unexpected but it came right on time.
I needed to get to Cojo. This was my chance to get close to her.
Wayne passed out, and I took out all my aggression on him. I pulled off the towel and exposed his flaccid penis. I pushed him back on the sofa so he was completely laid out. The razor that I had removed from his medicine cabinet was in my hand. I used this razor to sever the pulsating vein running down his dick. He wouldn’t be able to use that piece of flesh ever again. I cleaned up and headed over to my true love, Cojo.
CHAPTER FIFTY-FOUR
GINA MEADOWS
One week had passed since I had made that trip to Alpharetta and Merlin had been arrested, and I still could not get my shit together. I called my job and took off another week. I still was having a hard time understanding what had happened.
I did manage to unpack my shit, only ’cause I didn’t want Gavin coming in and seeing the boxes and asking me a bunch of questions. But, strangely enough, I hadn’t seen him. This only confirmed my suspicious that he had moved. I was fine with that since I didn’t want him living with me in the first place, but still . . . I started to cry again. My heart felt like it had a hole in it that would never heal, and I didn’t know how I would be able to go on with my life.
The doorbell rang. This wasn’t the first time that I ignored it, but it was the first time that I was standing near it when it rang.
“Gina, answer the motherfucking door,” Ronald screamed. He nigga-knocked on it to let me know that he meant business.
I wasn’t ready to see his sorry ass, so I went back into my bedroom, hoping his ass would go away.
“I’m not going away, so you might as well open the fucking door.
I wondered what happened to the fucking key that I made sure he always had, but I guess he had amnesia or some shit like that. “You’ve got a key, you fucker, use it.” I was not about to make anything easy for him after all the shit he had just put me through.
There was silence on the other side of the door for a few minutes before I heard him fumbling with the lock. Obviously, he had confused me with one of his other chicks, who hadn’t given him the key to their life.
When he finally got it opened, he pushed against the door like a superhero. In his arms he had the boxes I had left at his house. “What the fuck is your problem? I’ve been trying to get in touch with you for days.”
“What the fuck is my problem? Nigga, please. My problem is the wife you have posted up in a house that I thought I was going to occupy.”
“I never said that I was going to live in the house with you.”
As if that shit made it better. I wanted to beat his head in with an iron skillet. “You never said I wouldn’t. In fact, you told me that we were going to be a big, happy family.” I started making my way to the kitchen. He had really pissed me off, and I didn’t want to look at him.
“I never said I was going to marry you.”
I adjusted my voice so he could hear me from the kitchen. “I see, I had it all wrong.”
“Yeah, it was a big misunderstanding.” He had the nerve to chuckle like it was a big-ass joke.
That was when I snapped. I grabbed the biggest knife that I had left in the kitchen. “So let me make sure I understand what you are telling me. You married a woman nearly half your age and moved her into a home that I picked out the furniture for and did all the planning for. Is that what you came over here to talk to me about?”
“Well, I guess so.”
I heard enough. I raced toward my “husband with the knife. I wanted him to hurt as bad as I did. I stabbed him as hard as I could. I was aiming for his heart but only managed to cut him on the shoulder. I tried to whack it off.
“Bitch, are you crazy? You damn near took off my arm!” Ronald was pissed, but I didn’t give a rat’ s ass.
He had hurt me for so long, it was time I gave him a dose of his own medicine.
“Yes, I’m crazy. You made me this way. How dare you treat me like a jump off and move some other bitch into your house instead of me? Why would you marry her when I did the work?” I tried to get close to him so I could cut him again. I realized that I was going to go to jail along with Merlin, but I didn’t fucking care. Ronald had trampled on my feelings for so long, I felt like this was the only option.
“You can’t help who you love.”
No, he didn’t just say that shit to me.
I hit rewind in my mind, but I heard the same words. I let the knife hit the floor ’cause it wouldn’t matter how many times I stuck him, he would always come back with the same response. I could only pray that he wouldn’t want to press charges against me.
I crumpled to the floor. My wails were so loud, I didn’t even recognize them as coming from me. I felt as if my heart had been broken in pieces. It wasn’t the first time that Ronald had hurt me, but this was the ultimate. I now knew that all my years of work had been in vain. And I didn’t know if I could go on with that knowledge.
I got up from the floor and went into the bathroom. He was still in the kitchen trying to stop the blood flowing from his arm. I went straight to the medicine cabinet. I was done with this life that refused to treat me fairly.
I wasn’t a bad person. In fact, I had spent so many years in service to others, if this was the thanks that I got. I was done. I didn’t have anything else to live for. His children were grown, and I was going to wind up an old maid thanks to his trifling ass.
Ronald was still in the kitchen cussing, but he wasn’t running up behind me to get even. I guessed that was a blessing. I wanted to leave this world, but I wanted to do it on my terms. I went through the cabinet looking for the most lethal medicine I could find.
“Ain’t this a bitch.” There was nothing in there stronger than an aspirin. I didn’t know what I thought I would find since I wasn’t into popping pills or any hard drugs now that I’d managed to get clean. That was another thing that I did for Ronald’s stinking ass. When he was slinging coke, I was high all the time. I raced back into the kitchen to see if he had anything in his pockets that would help me out, but he had already left the house. I followed the trail of his dripping blood all the way out to the parking lot. He was gone. I went back inside.
Fear set in at this point. I was going to jail for sure. After all the dirt and shit I’d done, I was going to finally see the other side of a jail cell. “Lord, I’m sorry but he made me do it,” I wailed as I once again fell to my knees on the kitchen floor. Above all, I didn’t want to go to jail. I didn’t want to have to fight off some lesbo bitches trying to make an example of me.
“I talk a lot of shit, Lord, but I’m a coward.” Once I realized that I didn’t have anything in the house that would allow me to leave this world painlessly, other ideas started floating in my head. Ronald left for the hospital and with that the police would be en route to my house. I called my best friend.
“Tabatha, I need to come over. Are you busy?”
“No, I’m just chilling. Do you want to order some pizza and veg out?”
“That sounds good to me, I’m on my way.” I wasn’t the least bit hungry, but I needed to get away from this house just in case the cops were lining up to get me. Eventually, I knew I would have to face the music, but I wasn’t ready to do so right now.
Tabatha said, “Stop and get some beer, too.”
I almost told her what was really going on, but I didn’t want to admit to it over the phone. I had hit Ronald pretty hard. “I’ve got to get the fuck out of here.” I rushed into my room and grabbed several outfits that would hold me for a couple of days. I wouldn’t be able to stay there long because if Ronald lived, he knew exactly where Tabatha lived. If I was going to jail, I was going to go on my terms with my own lawyer and bond practically set before I got there.
I don’t know what made me make the call, but I decided to call my daughter-in-law as I was leaving the house. “Hello, can I speak to Cojo, please?”
“Who is this?” Cojo asked.
“Gina.”
“I’m sorry, Ms. Meadows, I didn’t recognize your voice.”
“It’s okay, sweetie, we don’t talk often.”
I held the phone away from my face shocked that she was being nice but I realixed Merlin must have told her about our talk. “I know, I’ve been a real bitch to you, and I would like a second chance. Do you think we could try that?” I knew my time was running out, but I wanted to at least put that shit behind me.
“Are you serious? I would like nothing more. I could use a mother figure in my life.”
“Mother figure? I didn’t say all that, but I would like to try.” I laughed. I never thought this would be possible between us.
“I’d like to try too.”
“Girl, what the hell is the matter? You look like shit.”
I pushed past Tabatha into her apartment. I didn’t need her to remind me about how bad I looked. I was on the run and looking good was the least of my concerns.
“Shut the door, you’re letting out all this air conditioning. I was trying to decide how much of the drama I was going to mention. I took a seat on the sofa as she shut and locked the door.
“You still haven’t answered me. What the hell is going on?”
“Uh . . .” I was still shaking and nervous as hell.
“Uh, hell. Spill it, girl. You know you can’t keep shit to yourself for long.”
She was wrong there. I’d kept a lot of stuff from her over the years, and if I told her any of it, I would have to tell it all.
“It’s all good. I just had to leave the house before I went stir crazy.”
“Stop bullshitting me and tell me what is really going on.”
I started to cry again, and she came over and wrapped her arms around me. She didn’t press me to talk. I just rocked in her arms until I got my emotions under control.
“It’s kind of a long story,” I said.
“Can I get the abbreviated version?”
I pushed away and moved over to the other side of the sofa. She was watching
Jerry Springer
on television. And, for a second, I got caught up in all the drama on the set.
“Ronald finally agreed to move home. I’ve been meeting with builders to design a house for us, and we did the final walk-through last week. He said we were going to move in next week.”
“I know I should be happy for you, but you know how I feel about him.”
“I know. And as much as I hate to admit it, you were right.”
“Say what?” She raised a brow.
“Yeah, he was lying to me all along.”
“What did he do?” Her voice was pinched, like she was about to go off on his ass.
“I jumped the gun. I was so excited about the new house and the new furniture that he let me pick out that I went home right after the walk-through and started packing. I didn’t realize that I’d accumulated so much shit. I had so many boxes, I couldn’t even walk through my apartment. So I had the bright idea of taking some of the boxes to the house and dropping them off.”
“Okay, that sounds reasonable.”
“It sounded good to me too. I went to the house and the guard let me in because I hadn’t had the chance to get a key yet.”
“Let me guess, the house is in his name only.
“Yeah, but he said it was because my credit was less than perfect. Anyway, I get to the house and the door is unlocked because the furniture people were still delivering furniture. I go in and start dropping boxes and this heifer I’d never seen before comes out of the kitchen. I thought she was someone that Ronald hired to decorate.”
“Oh, shit.”
“You can say that again. I asked who she was and she said Ronald’s wife.”
“Damn, now that’s some foul shit.”
“I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life. I hightailed it out of there. I didn’t even have the strength to get back my boxes. I told her to keep the shit.”
“Damn.”
“You said that.”
“Shit, I don’t know what to say. I knew the motherfucker was lowdown, but even I didn’t think he was that low.
“Well, go on and say it,” I said.
“Say what?”
“I told you so.”
“Sweetie, I was kidding when I said that. There is no way I would taunt you like that after something this traumatic happened to you.”
She surprised me. I just knew those would be the first words out of her mouth, that was why I hesitated to even tell her about it. She moved closer to me.
I said, “Needless to say, I’ve been a raging bitch for the last two days.”
“Have you spoken with the bastard?”
“He had the nerve to show up today with my boxes and it wasn’t pretty.”
“I’ll bet. I would have chopped off his dick,” she said, laughing.
“I didn’t get his dick, but I damn sure got his arm.”
“What did you say?” She leaned in closer so that our faces were practically touching.
I could see tears welling up in her eyes. “You heard me. I asked him why, and he started telling me some lame-ass shit, and I grabbed the biggest knife I could find and I swung at him.”
“Oh, God!” She fell back against the sofa as if I’d hit her too.
“I got his ass good, too, but now I’m afraid that I will go to jail.”