Slow Burn (Book 5): Torrent (7 page)

Back on the pontoon boat with the extra rifle, some ammunition, a couple of fishing poles, and a fishing tackle box full of all kinds of stuff that had no meaning to me, the boat putted slowly upstream. It was a quiet speed, a fuel conserving speed. But it was a speed that would leave us a couple of hours of travel time to the riverboat.

Seemingly broken by the weight of events, Nico fell asleep on one of the benches near the stern.

Murphy was standing beside me as I piloted. “That dude
ain’t right,” he said.

I cast a glance back at the sleeping
Nico. “He’s not cut out for this, is all. He’ll be okay.”

Murphy shook his head.

“I know he seems like he’s losing it, but he’s been through some shit.”

“We’ve all been through some shit, Zed.”

“Yeah, but that’s not all I was going to say about it. He had to watch his kids get killed in his front yard. He’d been on Nancy’s chain gang for a week when they captured me. He held it together all through that. And if you think driving that Humvee into the river was bad, our escape from Nancy was on a whole different level of crazy shit.”

“So you said.”

“You know, he can’t swim either. Oh, and what the heck is up with people who can’t swim?”

Murphy ignored my pointless question. “I still think he’s going crazy, man.”

“He just needs a couple of days of safety to get back to normal. Whatever’s normal for him, anyway.”

“What’s that mean?”

“I mean he talks even more than you.”

“Yeah, whatever. We don’t even know if Amy is going to let us stay on that riverboat yet. What are you
gonna do when Amy and Steph meet his whack job ass and decide he’s too crazy to come onboard?”

“They’ll let him stay.”

“Suddenly you’re the optimistic one.” Murphy belted out a big laugh. “Optimistic Zed. I don’t know how to deal with it, man.” Murphy pretended to have trouble with his balance and dropped into a seat.

I rolled my eyes. “Can we talk about Mark for a minute?”

“I told you that dude you saw wasn’t Mark. It was just some baldheaded dumbass too stupid to run away from the Humvee.”

I shook my head. “You can think whatever you want to think. I know what I saw. And even if I am wrong about it being Mark, I know he was a Smart One. You saw for yourself what the Smart Ones can do. You know they’re a danger to all of us.”

Murphy nodded noncommittally.

“They are organizing. They’re communicating. We’re at war, Murphy. We’re fighting to the death, and if we don’t go on the offensive and go start killing those bastards, they’re going to kill us.”

Murphy’s smile left his face. Only the serious, older Murphy remained. As much as he didn’t want to see it, he believed it. At least I think he believed it.

“We have to do something about them, Murphy.”

“What can we do?”

I looked back at the pile of weapons stacked all over the pontoon boat’s deck.

Murphy grinned and pointed at Nico. “He’s our secret weapon.”

I shook my head. “You know what I’m talking about.”

“What about the weapons, then?” Murphy waved a hand at the crates. “Are we gonna shoot all of ‘em? Everybody who thought that’d work is dead. It doesn’t matter how many bullets you have. It ain’t enough. You see that, right? Tell me you see that, Zed. ‘Cause you know the people who used to have all these weapons are dead now, right? You see that, right?”

As much as I wanted to argue, I couldn’t deny that truth.

Murphy pushed his point. “Your little nuclear bomb idea didn’t work.”

“It was a gasoline vapor bomb.”

“It doesn’t matter. It didn’t work. And do you know why?”

“Probably the humidity was too high. Maybe the wind mucked up the concentration of gasoline in the air. The ratio was wrong. Maybe if I’d detonated sooner—”

“No, Zed.” Murphy jumped to his feet and moved around to plant himself in front of me. “You don’t see what the problem is, but I do.”

In spite of the interruption, I was ready to hear the answer. Murphy served in the Army. Maybe he knew what to fix to make it all work next time.

“It’s because you don’t know what the fuck you’re doing.”

That wasn’t the answer I was looking for, and in fact, it pissed me right off. I huffed and looked around Murphy to see out over the bow. “Just because my bomb didn’t work on the first try doesn’t mean I don’t know what
the
fuck
I’m doing.”

“You don’t get it, Zed.”

“What don’t I get?”

“You think just because you know a bunch of random ass little shit that everything you try is going to work out like it did in some book you read or some movie you saw. The real world doesn’t work like that.”

“I know.” It was a weak protest.

“No, you don’t know. You say you know because you know that’s what a smart person should say, but you don’t know. You just think you know. And what you don’t know is when you’re running around, using up all of your luck, trying shit that shouldn’t ever have any chance of working, you’re wearing yourself out.”

I didn’t understand. “Wearing myself out? What?”

Murphy grinned. “You’re using up the luck so when I need it there won’t be any left for me.”

“So it’s all about you?”

Murphy grinned again. “Looks like that stick is back in your ass.”

I rolled my eyes again. “I thought we were having a serious conversation.”

We motored along a while longer. Whites were on the banks, peeking through the trees, or running along trying to keep up. At least their numbers were thinning.

“Murphy, you know I believe we’ve got to do something about the Smart Ones.”

“I know you believe that.”

“And you believe it, too.”

“Yeah, but believing something
needs
to be done isn’t the same as believing something
can
be done.”

“You don’t think we can kill all of the Smart Ones?”

“I won’t even talk about what a stupid hope that is.” Murphy shook his head. “Even if we could, we don’t even know which ones are which until it’s too late.”

I couldn’t argue with him. “That’s not an unsolvable problem. I don’t really think we’ll ever kill all of the Smart Ones, but we need to kill enough of them so we have a chance to be safe, so we’ll have a chance to survive.”

“So give me the bottom line here, Zed.” Murphy’s voice held a touch of anger. “You want to go off on some kind of zombie hunt? Is that it? And you want me to come along?”

I shrugged and nodded. That wasn’t how I’d summarize it, but that was exactly what I wanted.

“And just leave everybody on the boat, so when the shit goes down, we won’t be there.”

“When the shit goes down?”

“Don’t put on your dunce hat now and pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about. You know sooner or later, riverboat or no riverboat, those fuckers are going to find a way to get to us. And when that happens, where do you wanna be? Off chasing some baldheaded motherfucker through the woods or back with your friends, helping them get to safety?”

Murphy made a good argument with a depressing conclusion. But it was exactly the same conclusion that drove my desire to hunt down the Smart Ones. “That’s why we need to do it.”

“We?”

“Yes, we. If I go out there to kill the Smart Ones on my own, I know I’ll end up dead. If you come along, then we’ve got a chance.”

Murphy turned to watch the water flow past the bow.

“We have to, Murphy. You said as much yourself.”

“How’s that?”

“They’ll eventually figure out how to get to us on the boat. They tore up Dr. Evans
’ farm like it was nothing. They got into Sarah Mansfield’s house in less than twenty minutes. They’ll figure out how to kill every one of us, no matter where we hide. Our only choice is to kill the Smart Ones first.”

“But you’re forgetting one thing, aren’t you?” Murphy turned to look back at me.

He wasn’t being argumentative. He was making a point. And being unable to immediately guess what it was frustrated me. “What am I forgetting?”

“You might be wrong about the Smart Ones. Remember, at first you thought it was… What’d you call it? Emergent behavior? What if the Smart Ones aren’t running the show? What if it’s all just that collective intelligence thing? You know, a bunch of twenty point IQs adding up to genius level when they work together. What if that’s what it is? Then you’ll never kill enough of them.”

I shook my head even as I worked out my counterargument. “I think it’s some kind of hybrid of emergent behavior and the Smart Ones kind of guiding it. C’mon, you saw that for yourself, right? On that trail in the woods, one guy was clearly in charge. He was receiving and sending communications. All of those Whites on the trail were following him.”

“It did look that way. But it always looks that way. It always looks like one of them is in the lead, but it doesn’t seem to matter which one, does it?”

“I don’t know if that’s true. But I’m positive that is one of the things the Smart Ones take advantage of. They’ve figured out this follow-the-leader shit works. They do it spontaneously. The Smart Ones have figured out they can position themselves to be the leaders in that game, and when they do, they multiply their strength. It’s not just them going out and attacking regular folks, like us...”

Murphy laughed. “Regular folks like us?”

“You know what I mean. They get the dumb ones to do their dirty work. They get to have a meal of fresh meat and don’t have to put themselves in too much danger.”

“Be honest with yourself, man. We don’t know. We just don’t know. That’s why you keep changing what you say is going on with them.”

“I’m learning, and based on what I learn, I update my theory of their behavior.”

“That sounds like a fancy way of saying you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

Because we’d motored past the riverboat under the anxious eyes of all of our old and hopefully new friends, giving them a casual wave, they knew Murphy and I were safe. Perhaps not as important as our safety, but
significant, was that they’d seen the boatload of crates, as well as our sleeping passenger. After going what seemed like a long enough distance up river, we cut the engine and drifted the silent miles back.

When we arrived, the rain was turning from a drizzle to a thick fog. Murphy tossed a rope over to
Dalhover, who caught it and hauled us alongside. With our bow tied off, our stern drifted around in the current and swung up beside the big tourist boat. I jumped onto the boat’s deck and tied it off.

Nico
slept.

Murphy climbed onto the riverboat and into
Mandi’s waiting arms.

Steph
and Dalhover were in front of me when I stood up after tying off the stern. Emotional and physical exhaustion were weighing on me and I let my guard down. For the moment, I was safe. I was home, at our new home, if all had gone well between Amy, Steph and the others. I found a smile for Steph and pointed to the crates of munitions on the pontoon boat’s deck. “We got a lot more than we planned.”

Steph
put a hand to her forehead, reminding me of my gash. “What happened?”

My fingers came back with some blood on them. I guessed I looked terrible. “It’s not as bad as it looks. Maybe you can patch me up later.”

Steph took her worried eyes off of my wound, pointed to Nico and tersely asked, “Who’s that?”

Unprepared for anything but congratulations or possibly a hug, I was miffed. “
Nico. He’s the guy I told you about. The one I escaped from the chain gang with.”

“What’s wrong with him?”

“Worn out.” Was I being interrogated? “I don’t think he’s slept since the last time I saw him.”

“You said you left him with an old man.”

I looked at Dalhover, silently asking why Steph was in a bad mood. Dalhover conveyed nothing. What a surprise. “Mr. Mays. His name was Mr. Mays.”

“Yes, where’s he?”

“Dead.” Sure, I used the word “dead,” but I made it sound as much like “fuck you” as possible.

Dalhover
chose that moment to defuse the tension. “Can’t wait to hear how you guys got all of this.” He jumped down to the pontoon boat’s deck and started to examine the wooden boxes.

“You can’t just bring in any stray you come across,”
Steph said.

“But…”

“You know how Freitag worked out.”

And that silenced me.

I looked down into the pontoon boat as I thought about it. Sure, I’d let Freitag and her companions into Sarah Mansfield’s compound. But what else could I have done? I’d ruminated on that mess so many times, searching my memories for clues that could have showed me how badly it would all turn out. I’d told myself a thousand times that if I had been patient, Steph and the group would have come to the same decision. But I didn’t wait. I was so certain at the time that I was doing the right thing. I was decisive. And because of that decisiveness, I bore the responsibility.

Life’s not fair.

I don’t know if Steph saw my clenched jaw and my combative stance, or whether she just came to the end of her own anger. Whichever it was, her tone softened. “Zed, we need to talk about these kinds of things first. Okay?”

One moment she was Captain Leonard and the next she was just redheaded
Steph. She could switch modes faster than I could keep up. I glanced back at her to acknowledge she spoke. I wanted to turn away, to immaturely express my unhappiness with her hard words. But it was difficult. I was in the neighborhood of infatuation, at least when I wasn’t grating against her authority. I motioned toward Nico. “He’s an okay guy.”

“I thought you said he was a coward.”

“I probably said ‘pussy.’”

Steph
rolled her eyes. “Is he a liability for us? I don’t think you’re capable of seeing people in that way, Zed. I’ll bet you fed every stray cat in the neighborhood.”

“I never had a pet.”

Steph brushed past that. “Please, don’t take this the wrong way, but we need to be pragmatic, harsh if necessary, when we make these kinds of decisions. I know you won’t understand what I’m about to tell you, but we can’t risk our lives unnecessarily.”

I smiled. “That was almost a joke, wasn’t it? You were trying to make nice-nice by being funny. You do have a sense of humor. Well, almost.”

“I can be funny under the right circumstances.”

“I’m sure.” I looked over at
Dalhover, who was examining the crates.

“You know everything is different now.”
Steph chose to continue with her lesson. Captain Leonard mode again. “You want to do the right thing, Zed. You’re a good person. But that’ll get all of us in trouble if you don’t think about the consequences.”

I nodded, just because I’d already decided I was probably going to do whatever it was I was going to do. And the sooner she stopped lecturing me about doing what she
thought
I should do the better.

She put a hand on my shoulder to urge me to turn around and give her my attention. “These are hard choices to make. Let me make them, okay? We can talk about i
t, if you want. But you guys put me in charge for a reason,” she said. “I can make the hard decisions when it’s necessary.”

I glanced at
Nico. I was back in the conversation. “You want me to tell him to hit the road?” I sounded as though I was pleading.

“Listen, I’m not saying that. Let us talk to him when he wakes up and we’ll all decide. Okay? If he needs to go, I’ll tell him. I’ll do the dirty work. Okay?”

“We’ll just send him back out into the world? Alone?”

“He was alone when you found him, right? He won’t be any worse off if he needs to be alone again. If anything, he’ll be better off. We can probably give him some food. And it looks like you’ve got enough ammo and weapons for a whole company. I’m sure we can spare some.”

I shook my head. I’d been through all of this with Nico already. I’d already made the choice once not to bring him back and I’d left him with Mr. Mays. And Nico had paid the price. He was at the edge of his wits and it was my fault. I was ready to make up for that by letting him join us. “I don’t feel good about this.”

Steph
put her hand on my other shoulder and looked into my eyes. “That’s why you have to let me decide. Well, me and Amy.”

“You and Amy?”

“We’ve talked. They’re letting us stay.”

“That’s good.” I felt one of my worries slip away. “I think this is the safest place for us right now, and they seem like good folks.”

“We all agreed I’m still in charge. But Amy needs to have a say in whether we bring anybody else on board.”

“Okay. Just give
Nico some time to decompress. He was trapped in the house with Mr. Mays when we found him. The infected broke in and killed Mr. Mays. Nico’s in pretty bad shape.”

“Trust me. We’re not monsters, Zed. You know that, don’t you?”
Steph waited for an answer.

“Of course.”

“We want to do the right thing, too. We just need to make sure we’re all protected first.
We
have to come first. That’s just the way the world is now. Okay?”

“Okay.”