Slim for Life (19 page)

Once you’ve established why you want to get healthy, the next step is to figure out how you’re going to do it. This is where
setting goals comes in to play. People always talk about how important it is to have a goal and “write it down.” That’s very broad, vague advice and likely why most don’t achieve the goals they set. One key to setting a useful and achievable goal is to create it using a few important guidelines:

Once your long-term goal is established, it can be pretty overwhelming, and many people struggle to keep sight of the big picture. It’s easy to become intimidated when you think of everything you’ll have to do to get to where you ultimately want to be. The trick is to realize that achieving a long-term goal must be done by meeting a series of short-term goals that are not just about the outcome but about the process of getting there. You must plot and plan how you’re going to achieve the long-term goal in manageable stages. One of the best ways to do this is to create a goal pyramid that breaks the big goal into small, attainable short-term goals. This will allow you to literally plot a course of action, something that connects the things you’re doing at this moment to the future you envision for yourself. Put your ultimate goal right at the top of the pyramid, then follow it underneath with monthly, weekly, daily, and immediate goals. For example:

You see, using this formula you can break that long-term goal into a manageable action plan or road map that will lead you straight to your desired destination.

Don’t worry if you can’t draw. I’m talking about a mental picture. Visualize yourself at the precipice of your goal; then see yourself achieving it. Creative
visualization uses the power of the mind to inspire us and create the outcomes we want. Visions of achievement help you believe in your potential to turn your dreams into your reality. Picturing what you want and how you want to get it is a cornerstone to the process of making your dreams come true.

There are several important components to using this tool effectively:

Words are powerful. The things you say are what you believe. What you believe, you do. And what you do creates your reality. For this reason, the language you use must be geared toward positivity and success, not negativity and failure. Remove words like
can’t
from your vocabulary. And pay close attention to your choice of adjectives. Instead of saying something’s
hard,
say it’s
not easy
. Instead of saying something’s
impossible,
say it’s a
challenge
. Don’t say you’re
trying
(the word
try
means you’re planning on failing); instead say you’re
doing
. Don’t say you’re
bad at
something; say you’re
working on
it or
learning
it. Trust me, these small shifts make a huge difference in the way you perceive the world.

Why should you not strive to be perfect? Because no one is! You’ll surely set yourself up to fail, if you believe that you can or must be
perfect all the time. Jettison that all-or-nothing mentality. If you fall off the wagon, which at one point or another you will, just let it go. Steer yourself in the right direction, and move on.

It’s always amazed me how people can eat well and work out religiously for weeks at a time, then one day when they’re stressed, they’ll have some pizza or other junk they’ve been craving. Their entire regimen—eating, exercising, attitude—goes to hell. The little blip gets blown out of all proportion and triggers a wave of self-loathing and bingeing. Have some perspective, please!

Here’s an analogy that I use a lot, and I want you to remember it for when this scenario happens to you. If you get a flat tire, you don’t get out of the car and flatten all three of the other tires, do you? Hell no! You get out, change the flat, and keep going. The same rule applies to your lifestyle. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, get back on the wagon, and keep moving forward. Keep perspective in your pocket, and leave perfectionism alone.

If you’re having a hard time getting motivated, strip down to your undies and face yourself in the
mirror. I’m not asking you to pick yourself apart and criticize every real or imagined flaw. Instead, I want you to look at where you are currently, level with yourself, and say, “No, I really don’t want to paint that doughnut to the back of my ass. And yes, I could probably use a workout right now.” Accept your state of affairs, get out of denial, take responsibility, and choose to make a change. Acceptance is extremely liberating; it can help you let go of many of the insecurities that will hold you back, if you let them. You can’t look at yourself clearly if you’re hiding behind your clothing.

Now I want you to dump all the frumpy clothes that allow you to conceal your body. Get rid of them once and for all, so you can’t hide behind them anymore.

Read about, watch, or listen to someone else’s slim success story; it’ll be
inspirational. Look at before-and-after pictures on the web (I have a ton of these testimonials for Body Revolution on
www.jillianmichaels.com
) or watch
The Biggest Loser.
It doesn’t really matter whose story it is, where you find it, or how you digest it. All that matters is that you learn about and experience another person’s journey—follow his or her struggles and ultimate success. We humans are good at identifying with others. When we see someone else achieve their goal, it helps to motivate us. It cultivates our ability to believe in ourselves, to realize that we too can achieve a lofty goal.

I think most mantras are sappy platitudes that barely scratch the surface of self-worth, but there’s a way to make them a valuable, powerful, and positive tool. The key is to make your mantra a short, simple, action-oriented statement that becomes a rule you live by. Although it’s hard to create deep meaning in one sentence, it’s possible. Don’t pick a mantra that you think you
should
be saying to yourself, like “Just love yourself” or “Smile” or “See the glass as half full.” These are stupid choices—you should already know them, and so you won’t need them as a mantra. Instead, pick something you’ve heard that drives you and connects with you deeply. Pick a rule you can live by that makes you and your life better.

Lately, my mantra has been “A goal without a plan is just a dream.” I remind myself of this whenever I get impulsive or impatient. It slows me down and reminds me that some of the things we most desire in life take time to come to fruition. The rule grounds me and keeps me proactive and focused.

You don’t have to force yourself to come up with something spectacular. When you hear a phrase or a saying that resonates with you,
make it your mantra. Repeat it to yourself when you’re in doubt, or when you need a little reminder of how or why to do something important to you (like living slim). It will help keep you inspired.

Have you ever heard the cliché “You’re a product of your environment”? Well, it’s true of all of us, to a certain extent. Our environments can strongly influence our thoughts, choices, and performance in life. Since our entire modern culture is set up as an “environmental obesogen,” setting up your own personal environment for success, not sabotage, is crucial.

Look around you, at your work space, living space, car, and any other location where you spend time. Take note of anything and everything that might undermine your slim lifestyle. It could be the Dunkin’ Donuts on your route to work that always manages to lure you. Maybe it’s the bagels in your office kitchen or the candy bowl on your coworker’s desk. Wherever you identify these saboteurs, do your best to remove, replace, or circumvent them. Take an alternate route to work, one that steers clear of the doughnut shop. Bring your own food, and avoid the office kitchen like the plague. Converse via e-mail or phone with the coworker who is stocking fattening snacks; stay out of his or her office. Once you change your habits,
and your environment, it’s a good chance they’ll stay changed. Habit is that powerful.

Surround yourself with
inspirational images (like the vision board we discussed earlier or your goal-weight-loss outfit). Watch TV shows that lift your spirits. Read books and magazines that are positive, with strong messages of hope and self-empowerment, like
A New Earth, Men’s Health, The Four Agreements, O,
or
Shape
. Leave your running shoes by the door in the morning so you’re incentivized to grab a workout on your lunch hour. Using your physical space to automate healthy behaviors is one of the easiest and most profound changes you can make in your life. So get on it!

In a recent survey by Medi-Weightloss Clinics, 53 percent of women said that others had pressured them to eat foods that weren’t on their diet. Fifty-six percent of those women said they caved because they didn’t want to insult the person offering food. Forty-one percent said they caved because they didn’t want to call attention to their diet. Thirty-five percent said it was because others made jokes about their diet. What am I going to say?
These are just excuses for not taking control of your life and health.
Unacceptable excuses. Grow a frigging backbone! Speak up for yourself! Who else will, if you won’t? Be direct, and let others know about your slim goal. That will help hold you accountable with all your friends (those who are supportive and those who aren’t), allowing you to recruit the encouragement you need from those closest to you. And it will force those who sabotage you to face up to their own behavior and hopefully shame them into stopping.

People aren’t mind readers. Oftentimes friends or family can sabotage your slim without consciously realizing it. Don’t assume they know what you need or how to give it to you—you’ll just end up disappointed when you don’t get it. Whether it’s the coworkers who keep dragging you out for drinks after work, or the boyfriend who orders pizza in every night, or the mom who keeps baking you cookies—tell them about your goal. Start by telling them how important being healthy and slim is to you. Then tell them
how
they can help you. I want you to literally give them the tools and communicate to them the exact ways you need them to encourage and support you.