Sliding (The Stone Series) (23 page)

Tate continues, “When we sat down I went into the isle first and Bobby
sat next to me with Asia next to him, the rest of them filled in. I was by
myself, with all couples because my girlfriend left me for the whole summer,
remember?” Tate asks sarcastically.

He continues, “Lindsey showed up with two of her friends and their
boyfriends and she sat next to me. I don’t even really know her, we’ve been in
like three classes together our whole lives, and I had never even spoken to her
before. She would not shut the fuck up during the movie. I wanted to gag her.
There I was watching a movie and I couldn’t hear a thing that was happening
because of her big fucking mouth. I wasn’t even listening to a word she was saying.
It’s weird because you’re the only girl I’ve ever hung out with and you’re
nothing like that, she was so annoying. If I had to go out with girls like that
trust me I’d start batting for the other team.”

I sigh, “Just finish your story. What happened with Lindsey?”

“Okay, so she was going on and on about I have no idea what and then all
of a sudden her hand is on my leg and she very quickly runs it up my thigh and
luckily I was able to react before she reached “Rambo”. He actually reacted too
and shriveled up and retreated into my body. Honestly, he doesn’t like attempts
at being touched by hands that are not yours.”

I am so pissed off right now that his joking around is making me more
upset. I’m not at all happy that he is taking this so lightly and that he has
hid this from me for weeks now.

“I’m not in the mood for your little jokes right now just finish the
story” I snap at him and Tate continues.

“I told her to get the fuck off of me and she says she wants to hook up with
me. I told her I wasn’t interested in her and that I was with you. She said
she’d jerk me off or give me a blow job and I wouldn’t even have to touch her
so technically it wouldn’t be cheating on you. Can you believe her, what the
fuck is wrong with her? Who would offer to do that?” Tate looks at me like I
might have an answer but I am seeing red right now and can’t even speak.

I turn my back to him and he walks around so I am facing him again. I am
so mad right now I could spit. This isn’t even what I was mad about to start
with but now this is making it even worse and I tell Tate this.

He asks what I was mad about when I slapped him and I tell him, “Lindsey
asked me if I knew what’s been going on with you and Bobby. She said that you
guys have been getting sex lessons from Eric which I knew about but watching
Eric and his girlfriend have sex? She said that Asia and Bobby even did it in
front of all of you, that you watched them. She also claims that you even do
stuff with Asia and Amanda too. She said her sister is friends with Amanda and
she told her sister all about it before her and Eric left for college. I always
had this feeling nagging me in the back of my mind and I was never able to put
my finger on it but now I know what is was. It never made any sense to me that
you knew so much more than me about sex, that you knew how to do stuff and do
it right. Now I understand why. You weren’t doing them for the first time with
me; you were practicing on other girls!” my volume rises as I start to cry.

“Shh, you’ll wake your parents up” Tate warns.

“I can explain, just calm down and let me explain, listen to me. God damn
it Brook, turn around and fucking look at me. Lindsey was pissed because I
wouldn’t hook up with her so now she’s trying to cause problems between us.”

Tate is clearly getting angry and when he’s this mad he has a hard time
controlling his emotions. I decide it best to turn around and look at him but
not without rolling my eyes which I know he hates.

Tate takes a deep breath and begins, “Okay so this is how it all started.
One day when I was at Bobby’s he asked me if I wanted to see his brother’s porn
and of course I said yes. When we were looking at some of the magazines Eric
walked in and caught us. He said if we thought the magazines were good we
should watch his videos and he put one on. Bobby and I were mesmerized and Eric
laughed at us. He told us we were going to make total assholes out of ourselves
with you and Asia and be the laughing stock of the school.”

Tate sits down on the grass and motions for me to join him. I sit too but
I won’t move close enough to him so that he can touch me. He notices this and
growls a little, clearly not happy that I am keeping some distance between us.
I look at Tate as if to say continue and he picks up on my cue and obliges.

“I don’t remember how it all happened but Eric asked us if we even knew
how to whack off and we just kind of shrugged so he came up with this plan. A
few days later he let us hide in his closet when Amanda was over there and we
watched her give him a hand job. She didn’t know about it and he told us we
could never say a word or he’d kick our asses. I swear she never even took her
clothes off.”

I somehow doubt this is the end to this torrid tale and tell Tate to
continue.

“Well then he told us what to do when we got to third base. He showed us
how to practice on a piece of fruit with the core taken out, that’s how I knew
what to do, an apple, baby, not another girl.”

I can’t believe what I am hearing.

“I have a question, Tate” I begin. “Well, honestly I have many questions
but first, did you ever touch any girl other than me? And second, did another
girl other than me ever touch you? Let’s start with those two and depending on
the answers we’ll see about other questions. And DO NOT lie to me.”

Tate looks me directly in the eyes and swears he never touched another
girl and that no other girl except me has ever touched him.

“So that’s what you want a girl like Amanda who lets her boyfriend treat
her like that, a servant who will do anything for you? Because guess what Tate?
I’m not that girl and I will never be” I warn him.

“I don’t want you to be like that, Amanda and Lindsey; girls like them
make me sick. I like that you challenge me, give me a fight. Hell, even the way
you slapped me today. It hurt like hell, it brought tears to my eyes but the
fact that you care about me that much to get that upset…I like that” he admits.

“So did you watch them have sex? Did you watch Asia and Bobby too? Does
Asia know about this?” I ramble off.

Tate sighs and looks at the ground when he says, “I never watched Bobby
and Asia but he’s told me every detail of what they’ve done and yes she knows
all about Eric helping Bobby. I don’t think she knows that I was involved. She
told Bobby that he didn’t know what he was doing when they were fooling around
and after the first time they had sex she told him he’d better learn how to do
it right.”

He tries to touch me but I move farther away. “Did you go home after and
think about her while you…you played with yourself?” I ask not really wanting
to know the answer.

“Who?”

“Amanda or Lindsey, anyone.”

Do you want the truth?” Tate asks but doesn’t wait for my response. “I have
never thought of Amanda or Lindsey. I think of what it will be like to have sex
with you. That’s always what I think about when I whack off…you.”

Tate looks at me trying to gauge how this is going over then he asks,
“What is bothering you the most about this Brook? The fact that it happened,
that I didn’t tell you or that Lindsey did?”

I don’t look at him when I answer, “All of the above Tate” and I stand up
to walk back inside.

Tate gets in front of me and blocks me with his size. If he wants to keep
me where I am he can do so very easily, he must outweigh me by seventy pounds
and he intends to keep me where I am. He puts his hands on my shoulders and
tells me to sit back down while he pushes me with just enough force to make me
sit but not hurt me. I don’t have much choice so I sit there but I don’t want to
hear anymore and I don’t want to talk so I curl my knees into my chest and I
cover my ears. This irritates him which was my plan.

“Stop being a baby, Brooklynn. Look at me” he orders but I ignore him.

Tate kneels in front of me and shivers from the wind and lack of
sweatshirt and my heart melts just a little. He bends his head and nudges me
with his nose and I want to forgive him but I don’t know how to get past this.
I don’t like that he hid this from me. If he hid what Lindsey did what else is
he hiding or will he hide?

Tate can’t take my ignoring him for long so he’s the one to break the
silence, “I’m sorry Brook, it was wrong and I knew that when I did it but I did
it for you, for us. Yes, I did it for me too but I wanted you to think I knew
what the fuck I was doing. I didn’t want you to be like Asia was with Bobby and
think that I sucked at sex stuff which I would have by the way without Eric’s
help. I just wanted to be able to make you happy. You are so amazing and
beautiful. You could have any guy you want. You could have any experienced guy
that you want and I don’t want you to leave me for someone better than me at
sex.”

Tate’s voice cracks like he’s about to cry, “Please forgive me, please
don’t break up with me. I love you, Brook. I need you. You are my whole world;
I’ll do anything to make you not be mad at me anymore. Just tell me what to do
to make this all better between us and I’ll do it.”

I think for a minute and then I honestly respond, “There is nothing you
can do to make me not be mad about this or to make it better between us. I just
need time to try to forgive you and you need to earn back my trust. You can’t
lie to me or hide things from me and then expect me to trust you. Now go home
and call me when you get there so I know you get home safe.”

Tate smiles for the first time tonight and asks, “So does that mean I am
still your boyfriend? You’re not breaking up with me?”

I sigh and think about it for a minute or two then I answer from my
heart, “I love you and no, I guess I am not breaking up with you but I am still
mad and this changes things between us. I don’t trust you right now and I hate
the way that makes me feel, it scares me.”

Tate stands and I stand with him. “I’m sorry; I’ll do everything I can to
earn back your trust. I love you” he says while looking at the ground then he
goes to leave without trying to kiss me or taking his sweatshirt back, I guess
he figures why push his luck so I take his sweatshirt off, stand on my tip toes,
slide it over his head and kiss the cheek I slapped this afternoon.

“I’m sorry about your face, it’s much too handsome to be slapped” and I
turn and walk back inside.

Chapter 7: The Reminiscing

When we get back to the hotel after my doctor’s appointment Tate has to
have a meeting with Dominick and his security team to learn everything that
happened with the threat against him but the information is never shared with
me. I’m told there was a threat made against Tate and until further notice we
will have tight security. Tate claims it’s nothing to worry about, just some
silly nonsense over song rights and a disgruntled songwriter. This has happened
a few times before.

The first time it happened was when a woman became obsessed with Tate
after seeing his picture in the tabloids and she snuck into our home, put on
some of Tate’s clothes and was found in our bed. After that we got basic
security and hired Dominick. Then once when Tate was representing a rapper who
had reportedly been in a gang, the opposing gang was rumored to have a hit out
on Tate for producing a song that had lyrics about them that they didn’t like. The
last time anything like this happened was at least three years ago when Tate
was with another client on tour and some girls ended up in the musician’s hotel
room. Tate got involved when they learned the girls were way under age and destroyed
the hotel room with their drug party. Shortly after, one of the girls started stalking
Tate. She would call his studio or show up there trying to get in. She even
sent him naked pictures of herself.

I ask Tate to have Mac come to California to be my security but he’s
hesitant to leave our Connecticut home unattended.

I need to get to my studio; I’m working with Heidi on a new workshop. Tate
insists that Dominick take us and never leave my side, I have no choice but to
agree. On the way to Heidi’s suite I have a brilliant idea. I am going to set
Dominick and Heidi up. I think they might work out well together. She’s
probably ten years younger than him but she’s always complaining that in our
business the only men she meets are gay and any guy she meets in a bar needs a
mommy to take care of him, not a girlfriend or a wife. I plan to see if I can
let them fall into it on their own before I start my match making. I figure laying
a little groundwork with Dominick on the way over couldn’t hurt too much.

I tell him that Heidi and I have worked together for about five years.
She became my assistant after she danced for me in a video. My assistant at the
time left to start his own dance company and Heidi felt like a perfect fit and
she has been. I tell Dominick that she is a brilliant dancer and has such
wonderful visions for our choreography. He listens attentively, more
attentively than he’s ever listened to me before so maybe he is interested.

I chance it and ask about his personal life, “So, um Dominick do you uh
date? I mean I’ve never seen you with anyone but that doesn’t mean…I was just
wondering if…” I trail off and Dominick smiles at me.

“I don’t have a girlfriend at the moment, I’ve never been married and in
case your next question is about my sexual orientation, I am not gay” he says
with the smile still on his face.

“I’m sorry Dominick I shouldn’t pry it’s just I guess I’m a little lonely
and just need a friend for some girl talk. Not that you remind me of a girl, Oh
I should just shut up.”

Dominick laughs at me and says it’s fine.

“I’m looking forward to meeting this Heidi you speak so highly of. I’ve
been lonely now for a long time. It would be nice to have someone to spend my
free time with, that’s what you’re up to isn’t it? Not that I’ll have any free
time with our bumped up duty but it’ll be over soon Mrs. Taylor don’t worry,
you and Tate are safe with me and my team.”

“Dominick, listen you and I kind of got off on the wrong foot when we
first met. I don’t know; I always felt you were Tate’s person and we never got
to know each other. Please call me Brook and let’s talk more often. Now come
on, I’ll introduce you to Heidi. I think she’s going to like you.”
 

I introduce Heidi to Dominick when we arrive at her door and they
exchange some small talk. They engage in pleasant conversation during the short
car ride to the studio. When we arrive at my studio Dominick turns and heads to
sit by the door while we work out some of our choreography and Heidi mouths
“thank you” to me. We work for a few hours and accomplish what we’ve set out to
do; it turns out to be quite a good workout too because of course Heidi is
showing off for Dominick. He watches from his post at the door and I notice him
taking calls from time to time. I’m sure it’s Tate checking up on us.

When we go to leave Dominick makes a smooth move and opens the front door
as Heidi passes by the car and she accepts his gesture and climbs in. I jump
into the backseat and wink at Heidi in the mirror. Dominick gets out of the car
and opens her door for her again when we arrive at the hotel and when him and I
get into the elevator to head to my suite he informs me that they have dinner
plans for later that night.

I head into our suite to find it empty, I have no clue where Tate is off
to and why he’s gone somewhere without Dominick. Dominick excuses himself and
heads off to locate Tate. I decide to shower so I turn on the radio to find “Pour
Some Sugar on Me” playing and I’m back in high school again.

************

The fall of our junior year flies by without much more fan fair after the
“sex debacle”. Tate started on the Varsity football team and I cheered, we went
to and won states with much credit going to Tate and his skills once again.

Tate’s father has to take a business trip to Hawaii and his mother is
going with him. They are scheduled to leave right before Valentine’s Day which
is also Tate’s birthday. They feel terrible leaving Tate for his birthday but
they have already told me their plans to throw him a surprise bash when they
get home, I of course have told Tate all about it knowing he hates surprises.
While his parents are gone Tate is staying at his Nana’s house but Tate and I
devise a plan to spend the night together for his birthday. He tells his Nana
that he will be staying the night at Bobby’s and he has Bobby pick him up at
his Nana’s house. I tell my parents that I am sleeping at Wendy’s house and I
have her come pick me up. Bobby drops Tate off at his house shortly before
Wendy drops me off there.

Tate has just enough time to fill his bedroom with candles before I
arrive. Tate greets me at the door and pulls me into his house and into his
arms. We’ve spent many nights on the phone leading up to tonight talking so I
know what I’m getting myself into when Tate takes me by the hand and leads me
up the stairs to his bedroom. He opens the door and all of my senses are set on
fire. I can smell the aroma and see the flickering of the candles, hear
“Together Forever” on the radio and feel Tate’s touch on my lower back guiding
me into his room. I hear him close the door then I hear the click of the lock
and I look at him confused, I thought we were alone. Why the need to lock the
door, to keep me in or keep someone out?

Tate senses my apprehension and explains, “Just in case, don’t worry
we’re alone and I’m not holding you hostage.”

Tate takes me into his arms and we start to dance to the music that has
changed to “I Don’t Want to Live without You.” When he feels my body relax in
his arms he leads me over to his bed and I sit down on the edge. I am wearing
Tate’s favorite tight black sweater and jeans with rips in the knees exposing
my skin. Tate has on his grey football t-shirt and jeans that are zipped but unbuttoned,
his have a rip in the thigh exposing his hot muscular flesh. He looks so
incredibly hot like this I almost don’t want him to take off his clothes…almost.
He is standing in front of me between my legs as he puts his hands into my hair
and pulls me to him. I gently lift his shirt revealing his flat, toned stomach
and I gently press a kiss on it. Tate lets his head roll back and a moan
escapes him. He takes me by surprise when he sits next to me and asks to talk.

“Brooklynn, are you one hundred percent sure about this, once we do it we
can’t go back. I won’t be mad if you want to change your mind. I will be
frustrated as hell and have blue balls for the rest of my life but seriously, I
won’t be mad. I don’t ever want to make you do anything you don’t want to do”
Tate tells me.

“I’m totally sure; I don’t want to change my mind. We’ve planned
everything, I’m ready, and we’re prepared. It’s my birthday and Valentine’s Day
present to you. Remember?”

Tate sighs, “It is the best present ever, you are the best present ever.”

I slide my tongue between his partially parted lips. I hear as he catches
his breath then he starts to kiss me hard as he pushes me down on his bed and
climbs up my body, lying on top of me. I know my lips are going to be swelled
beyond recognition within minutes of this kind of assault on them but I love
every sweet second of it. I feel the weight of him on me, his body heat and the
hard length of him against my jeans. I have never been this turned on before in
my life and I know it’s from the anticipation of what is yet to come.

Tate kisses me hard on the lips again. He runs his tongue over my top lip
first then my bottom. When I part my lips he slides his tongue into my mouth
and I suck on it before I release it. His breathe catches from my actions and
he smirks at me saying, “Feeling frisky tonight are we?” as he lays his body next
to mine. We lay next to each other for a while before Tate rolls on his side,
looks me in the eyes and says, “Make love to me now Brooklynn. Be my first, my
last, and my only. Let me be yours.”

I nod yes then plead, “I’m so scared it’s going to hurt. Please do it
slow and easy, okay?”
 

“I don’t want to hurt you baby but I do think it’s going to hurt a
little. If it hurts too much I’ll stop okay? But I think it’s better if I get
it in fast, if I try to break through you slow I think it’s going to hurt
worse. Kind of like a band-aid, you know. Now try to relax and don’t tense up. It
shouldn’t hurt more than you can handle” he claims but what the hell does he
know?

As “Truly” by Lionel Richie is playing Tate slowly rolls on top of me,
between my legs. His legs spread mine apart and I oblige making just enough
room for him. He kisses my forehead saying softly, “I love you; you are so
beautiful, mine, just mine.”

Tate kisses me on the lips and asks, “Ready?” He feels my body tense and
instructs, “Relax, I’m going to try my best not to hurt you but if you are
tense like that then it’s going to hurt more.”

And just like that we are a mix of pleasure and pain, neither of us
knowing where one of us ends and the other starts. We are one, bound together
forever by one simple act of passion. I curl into a ball and start to sob. I
cry over the pain and my lost innocence. I cry for Tate and I, knowing this has
changed us both forever, questioning for the first time if we were really ready
for this, but it’s too late now. There is no going back, no repairing broken
flesh or erasing experiences, memories that will stay with us for a life time.
I just hope it will be a life time together.

Tate curls his body around me and kisses my hair and tells me over and
over again that he loves me.

“I’ll be right back, stay here, don’t move” Tate says after a while.

When Tate comes back he has a tray with a drink for each of us on it, he
hands me mine and I drink every last drop. There are also flowers for me and a
small box on the tray. Tate says the flowers are for our first time and the box
is my Valentine’s Day present. He is also carrying an ice pack for me.

“Did I hurt you?” Tate asks as he hands me the ice pack. It feels cold
and soothing and I’m glad for it. I admit I’m in some discomfort but I admit it
felt good too. He kisses my forehead and I thank him for the flowers and he
tells me to open my Valentine’s Day present. It’s a locket on a necklace with a
picture of us together in it. On the back Tate had it inscribed, “First, Last
& Only”. He puts it on me and I promise never to take it off. He blows out
the candles, curls his body around me and we fall asleep in each other’s arms,
forever changed.
 

The next morning I wake up with soreness between my legs and it instantly
reminds me of Tate and where he was last night. I feel the weight of Tate’s
body sprawled over half of mine and his body heat is just bearable. I start to
wiggle free but his arms surround me holding me in place. I realize he’s awake
when he starts kissing my hair, “Hello beautiful girl. Waking up with you in my
arms is the best” he murmurs.

“Hey” I respond and I feel him pressing into my leg.

“How sore are you? Do you think we can go for round two before we need to
leave? Wendy and Bobby said they’d be around to get us in less than a half hour
but that should give us enough time. I’ll be gentle” Tate entices me.

On my way back to the hotel I hear
“Together Forever” on the radio and I am reminded of the night Brooklynn and I
lost our virginity to each other.
 
I
haven’t thought about that night in a long time.

I fill my room with candles that my
mother had all over the house and I get the mixed tape I made special for the
night out of my dresser drawer and I pop it into my stereo. I turn the lights
off in my room and make sure the bed looks neat; I made sure my sheets were
clean before I left for my Nana’s. I spray a little extra cologne on as I hear
Wendy’s car pulling into my driveway to drop Brook off. I have a sick feeling
in the pit of my stomach.