Authors: Jennifer Davis
“I listened to everything he said to me, to every promise he made,” she sniffled. “We never made it to that point, but he asked me to marry him. We made all these plans…” Tears fell down her cheeks. “And then, just like that, it was all gone. He was gone. We were done.”
“Sometimes I feel like it was a blessing. I had the means to provide for a baby, but so did my mother. She never wanted to be a mother. All she wanted was a piece of old man Abbott’s cash. I was raised by a fucking maid. She kept groceries in the house, made sure I got to school and back okay, taught me how to do laundry, and helped me with my homework while my mom was out with some guy or passed out drunk somewhere. The last thing I would ever want is to end up like her.” She shook her head as if she was finished talking about her mother.
“Anyway,” she breathed. “Things between me and Asher got weird after. We didn’t really talk about it, and he seemed afraid to touch me.
Like I would break or something. That part of it was hard, because that was what I wanted most from him. I needed him to comfort me, to still love me. I guess he couldn’t bring himself to do it. But what really got me was the way he looked at me. The same way he looks at me now, like he’s looking right through me.” Hazel smeared the tears off her face. “We spent less and less time together until we were both seeing other people somehow. Like none of it had ever happened. That’s why I still wear the necklace—to remind me that it did. I don’t care if he laughs at me for the rest of my life; I’m never taking it off.”
Hazel sat up straight in her seat and wiped her face with the bottom of her t-shirt. “I was so afraid of
what if
then that I don’t let anything scare me anymore. I can’t. I know that whatever happens in my life I can only control a small part.” She gave me a hard grin and stood up. “I’m gonna see what’s taking the boys so long.”
I went after her.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” I said and hugged her tight. “Me too,” she whispered before letting go and walking away.
We’d barely finished our food before the girl with the pink scrubs came to take me to my mother’s room. I was suddenly nervous about seeing her, and then wondered what I would say. Would I have to convince her that she could be happy without my dad? That people move on all the time after suffering greater tragedies than having their husband leave to start a new family with a younger woman? Then I wondered what she would say to me. Would she apologize? Or would she say she wished my father had minded his own business and let her die?
“Are you ready?” Kasey asked, pulling me from my thoughts. I nodded and stood, taking his hand. My mother’s doctor was stepping out of her room as we walked up.
“How is she?” I asked, pretty sure I didn’t need to introduce myself. I figured he remembered the hysterical girl who’d called him an inconsiderate asshole after having a shouting match with her father in the emergency room.
“As far as we can tell, this was an accident. She’d been drinking, and according to her medical records, was taking a prescribed medication. The bottle’s label matched the script, but the medication inside was of a higher dosage, almost double. She was very lucky.”
“So, it was an accident. She didn’t really try to kill herself?”
“It appears that way, but we will be keeping her for another day or so for observation. Before you go in, you should know there is some bruising on her face and neck and she may not want to talk much. Her throat will be very sore for a few days. I’ve got to get to my next patient.”
“Thank you,” I gushed. I was so happy that I hugged Kasey like he was the one who’d saved her or something. “I’m glad she’s okay. Go see her. I’ll wait here.” I agreed and slowly stepped past the threshold of my mother’s room.
“Bet you hate the décor,” I said, trying to keep the mood
light. The room was cream and mauve with two light green chairs on one side of her bed. Even I thought it was hideous.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” she croaked. “You must have been terrified.”
“I was,” I whimpered. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”
She patted my hand.
“Me too. That pharmacy is going to have one hell of a lawsuit on its hands.”
I smiled, almost laughing at her feistiness. “Yes they are,” I agreed. She took my hand. “Things are going to be different when I come home,” she promised, swallowing hard. I could tell the pain in her throat was making it hard for her to talk.
“Okay,” I nodded. “You rest now.” I kissed her cheek and sat in the ugly green chair beside her bed until she dozed off.
When I went back into the hallway, Luke and Tosh were waiting with Hazel, Chase, and Kasey.
“I’m so glad your mom’s not intentionally suicidal,” Tosh boasted, cracking everyone up.
“That would make an excellent card,” Hazel laughed. “Somebody get me Hallmark on the phone.” I playfully narrowed my eyes at her, which only made her laugh harder.
“I’m so sorry, Ryen. I didn’t mean for it to come out that way,” Tosh whined.
“I know. It’s okay,” I smiled. “I needed that laugh.”
“How is she feeling?” Kasey asked.
“She’s going to be sore for a while, but I doubt she’ll mind.” The tradeoff is worth it.
“I’m glad she’s okay,” Luke offered.
“Me too,” Chase added.
“So am I, thank you. And thanks for being here.” Although I meant it when I said they didn’t have to come, I was glad they had. I never in a million years imagined that I’d end up being friends with the kind of people, who, in my old life would never have acknowledged my existence.
“How about we get the hell out of here?” Hazel asked, eyebrows
raised. Everyone agreed and began chattering about what we would go do.
The hospital’s sliding doors opened and as the six of us walked out into the blaring sun, I watched my friends.
Hazel and Chase playfully shoved each other, Tosh and Luke were trying to kiss and walk at the same time. Chase saw and kicked Luke in the ass, and then laughed like he’d never seen anything funnier. Tosh turned around and tried to land some karate kid style kicks, but she was laughing too hard to do any damage. Hazel threw her arm around Kasey’s neck and two of them did that talking without words thing again for a moment, and then they both smiled. Which made me smile, too.
I felt like I was in the ending of a John Hughes film
; in that dreamy state where something that started out so shitty ends so perfectly. In that moment, I was John Bender walking home with my heart full and my fist in the air.
Then I noticed my father in the parking lot standing next to my car. He was talking on his cell phone with his back to us. I
stopped in my tracks.
He suddenly turned around and I knew he’d seen me. He paused, watching.
“What do you want to do?” Kasey asked. My heart pounded, blood rushed, thoughts raced. I turned to Hazel. She smiled mischievously as if she’d read my mind, both of us starting to laugh before I shouted, “Run!”