Sister Betty Says I Do (3 page)

“She called to remind me that I promised her two weeks ago that I'd pick up one of her relatives at the airport today. I guess it's a good thing I was going, anyway, because I'd truly forgotten about it.”

“Well, a promise is a promise,” Sister Betty told him quickly.

Leotis blew a kiss at Sister Betty, causing cake crumbs to scatter. “That's true, and as long as it's someone who's not talking about marriage, we'll have a short but lovely ride back to Pelzer.”

“I gotta hand it to ya.” Freddie laughed. “When it comes to making up a way to not talk about getting a wife, you take the cake.”

“That's right. As a matter of fact, I feel like another slice to take for the road.”

As though she hadn't heard him, Sister Betty sighed, “That reminds me. Can we get to the airport?”

She couldn't claim to know all of Sasha's relatives, but she was certain none of the Hellraiser nuts had fallen far from the tree.

“W
e haven't even arrived at the airport.” Leotis spoke through clenched teeth. “I'll call you as soon as they are in the car and we are leaving. This is the third time you've called. Mother Pray Onn, I need to keep my eyes on the road and not answer cell phone calls every five miles. . . . I know what she'll be wearing. You've told me that three times, too.” He flipped the cover to his cell phone, turning it off for good.

Sister Betty watched the pained look on Leotis's face. It was the same expression he'd had since they left her house and she reminded him that none of Sasha's relatives, with the exception of her niece Zipporah, were sane. “Zipporah was raised from birth by foster parents,” she'd told him. “That's the only reason she escaped the crazy gene pool them Hellraisers call a family.”

They'd just driven into the Delta arrival terminal when Sister Betty spotted Sharvon dressed in a yellow, sleeveless tunic-style dress. A purple sash accentuated her tiny waist. She was waiting by the curb with her luggage. Sharvon appeared engaged in conversation with another young woman, who was shorter. The other woman had long red hair pulled back into a ponytail and was dressed in tight green shorts and a white halter top that would never stop her large bosom, should it decide to escape.

“We'll need to get Sharvon's attention quickly,” Leotis told Sister Betty. “The TSA won't allow this car to remain idling too long.” With the glare from the hot sun nearly blinding him, he craned his neck out of the car's window, trying to look in Sharvon's direction. “From what little I can see,” he said, now using one hand to shield his eyes, “she's not alone. If it's a friend who needs a ride, and it's not too far out of our way, I think we can fit all their luggage in the trunk and squeeze one more person besides Mother Pray Onn's kin inside the car.”

Just as Sister Betty's car window began rolling down, she heard her name being called. It wasn't Sharvon, but the woman standing with her.

“Sister Betty!” the woman called out, waving frantically at the car as Sharvon joined in, waving at her, as well.

They had wheeled luggage, and instead of waiting for Leotis's car to come closer, Sharvon and the other woman began racing toward it against the traffic.

When they neared the car, Sister Betty's head jerked toward Leotis and then back at the women. She took a large swallow and moaned, “Oh, Jesus, why give me two of them all in one day?”

“What's wrong?”

“That's Ima Hellraiser with Sharvon!”

“Do you mean Mother Pray Onn's niece Ima? She's the one I'm supposed to pick up.” Leotis used both hands to shield his eyes before he blurted, “Wow, she doesn't look anything like the way she was described to me.”

“Yes. She's the one and, I thank God, the only one.”

“She doesn't look anything like Mother Pray Onn,” he said softly, his eyes suddenly appearing brighter. “She's beautiful.”

“She's deadly like a snake and sneaky like a scorpion,” Sister Betty hissed. “You'd have to watch out for that one.”

“Luke ten, nineteen,” began Leotis in his baritone preacher's voice. “Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means hurt you.” With both hands now gripping the steering wheel tightly, he smiled, his eyes still locked on Ima as she strode toward the car with Sharvon.

“Harrumph!” Betty replied as she searched her mind for a rebuttal scripture. “Exodus seventeen, two. Why chide ye with me? Wherefore do ye tempt the Lord?”

Before they could continue their back-and-forth, impromptu scripture challenge, Sharvon tapped on the driver's side door.

“Hello, Leotis. Please hurry and open the door.” Sharvon quickly pointed to the other woman. “We've got extra company, and we need to get out of this heat.”

Ima said nothing as her bright green eyes with specks of brown became like missiles, locking onto Leotis. She smiled appreciatively. “Speak for yourself,” Ima told Sharvon, laughing. “Hellraisers live for heat.”

Both women piled into the backseat while Leotis placed their luggage inside the trunk, and Sister Betty rubbed her knees, which had suddenly begun to throb. It was a sure sign that God was trying to tell her something using her knee phone or a continuation from her bad night.

“Sister Betty, I thought that was you.” Ima laughed and began squirming in the backseat, causing a bit more jiggling from the halter top than necessary “I heard about your news.” Again, she laughed and began humming, “Here comes the bride. Here comes the bride.”

“Yes, Ima, it's me. I'm certain I've made your day” Sister Betty turned in her seat, looking Ima straight in her green eyes, which seemed suddenly brighter from the laughter. “We ain't got to worry about no police or nothing, do we? I've got other things to do than go get Sasha to bail you out, especially since I'm not on speaking terms with her.” She quickly turned around, letting Ima know that she'd said all she wanted to say and no response was welcomed or needed.

“I didn't know you and my cousin Betty were such old and not-so-dear friends,” Sharvon said, slowly hunching her shoulders, with a questioning look upon her face.

“I've known Sister Betty most of my life, and we always tease like that,” Ima said softly. Pointing to Leotis, who'd just reentered the car, she added, “But I don't believe I've ever met him.”

Not waiting for Sharvon to introduce them, Leotis turned around and extended his hand to Ima. “I'm Reverend Leotis Tom.”

“From Crossing Over Sanctuary?” Ima asked. “You mean you're the gentleman who Aunt Sasha got to fetch me?”

“The one and the same,” Leotis replied. “I've been Mother Pray Onn's pastor for more than eight years, and yet I don't recall you ever coming to the church.”

“Are you certain about that?” Ima purred.

“I'm certain I would have remembered you from among the more than two thousand members.”

The immediate and appreciative glances between Leotis and Ima didn't go unnoticed by either Sister Betty or Sharvon.

Sharvon said nothing. She pursed her lips and just stared at the back of Sister Betty's head or looked out the window.

Sister Betty could tell Sharvon felt uncomfortable, because she hadn't said much. She also recalled the conversations she'd had with Sharvon over the past few months, since she'd come to stay after her mother died. She knew Sharvon had more of an attraction to Leotis than she'd let on, yet just like him, she wasn't rushing to enter the dating or matrimony game. “He doesn't seem to be in a hurry, so why should I?” she'd said after she and Leotis had gone out several times to dinner and a movie. “We're just good friends.”

Sister Betty fingered her Bible and wondered whether or not she'd approve of Ima becoming the jealousy-driven shove toward Leotis that Sharvon needed.

However, until she made up her mind one way or the other, Sister Betty wasn't about to let any flirtation between Ima and Leotis continue unchecked. And so she reached over and tapped Leotis on his knee and began singing as the car turned onto the highway heading back toward Pelzer. “If you let that Devil ride . . . she's gonna wanna drive.”

Smiling at his spiritual mother's obvious insinuation, Leotis looked into his rearview mirror. He did it just in time to catch the unappreciative eye of Sharvon and the flirtatious look from Ima. Now strumming the steering wheel, he could think of but one response to his spiritual mother's warning. It was the words in an old Stevie Wonder song he'd always liked, “Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing.”

Suddenly Leotis felt alive and leery at the same time. It'd been quite some time since he'd been in female company and felt what he was feeling.
Father God, please don't place me between a rock and a hard place. Wisdom and restraint, Lord
. . .
I need wisdom and restraint.

Sister Betty, on the other hand, clasped her hands and began silently praying as she queried God.
Father, I've been all up and down and in and out of your holy Word. If there's any situation in that book that is akin to what I know is about to happen if Leotis lets Ima into his world, please show it to me. And, Father, if it be thy will, please slap Leotis upside the head with some wisdom. Amen.

I
t was early Friday morning, just a little past dawn, and for days Sister Betty had witnessed Leotis stretch and bend his staunch beliefs on marriage and dating like a Cirque du Soleil contortionist.

She wasn't really surprised. In fact, she'd known for the past week or so of restless sleep, throbbing knees, and the other discomforts that followed Sharvon's return, with Ima in tow, that something would go wrong. Sister Betty just didn't know when, where, what, or how.

She had also missed having Sharvon around to toss around her ideas for the wedding. Eight and a half weeks would pass before she knew it, and there was plenty to decide and to have done. Although they lived in the same house, Sister Betty seldom saw Sharvon. Sharvon would leave before eight in the morning and would not return until almost midnight. She had spent almost the entire past four days at the Singer and Berry law firm, to which soon would be added the name Becton. Sharvon had finally accepted their offer to join. It'd mean long hours, for the most part, until Sharvon became familiar with her various cases and the staff she'd oversee. Sister Betty was pleased because law was something Sharvon loved and had thrown herself into.

In the meanwhile, Sister Betty made up her mind that she wouldn't allow Ima's sexy come-ons to become a reason for any romantic notions between Sharvon and Leotis. At
least Sharvon won't be witnessing the way Ima's gonna just throw herself at Leotis. I just know she will. I can just feel
it, she thought.

Sharvon quietly entered the kitchen and threw her arms around Sister Betty's neck. “I'm about to go for a quick run before I head out to the office this morning.”

Sister Betty laughed as she turned to face Sharvon. “Come on, Sharvon. Sit with me for a moment and have some breakfast. If you don't come out of that size four you wear and put on some weight, I'll have to get your maid of honor dress from the toddler department.”

“There'll be no buying anything for me in some toddlers' department,” Sharvon said as she pulled at the string on her running shorts. “I'm trying to maintain this weight so if I have children one day, I can relax and not worry about gaining too much weight.”

 

Leotis Tom held the reputation as one of Pelzer's most handsome men in and out of a preacher's robe and the fastest. He loved running and had won several local marathons. When he wasn't on his knees, praying and talking to God, he'd have his heavenly chat while running.

He awoke early this Friday morning and found that it was already in the mid-seventies. He wanted to start off his day with a run at a nearby high school. He was soon dressed in one of his usual eye-candy outfits: dark running shorts that showed off long legs with double-dipped muscles, one stacked one upon the other; a white headband to absorb the sweat; and a white tank top that displayed arm muscles resembling the back of an alligator's tail.

Leotis was in the midst of tossing his gym bag onto the backseat of his car when he heard laughter coming from the direction of Sister Betty's house.

“I see great minds are thinking alike this hot and about to be humid morning,” Sharvon called out, laughing while she pointed to her outfit. She wore a pair of dark brown gym shorts, a beige tank top, and running shoes. She wore her hair in a ponytail, and it partially covered the backpack dangling off one shoulder. “Are you on your way to Barack Obama High, too?”

Whether he meant to or not, as usual, the way Leotis smiled showed his appreciation for her well-toned body. He was still a man with manly needs, but he was also one who quickly shook his head, rebuking the possibility of a lustful thought. Over the months he'd come to respect and admire Sharvon, and he loved her like the little sister he'd never had. Although they hardly ever planned to run the track together, this wasn't the first time they left their homes at about the same hour to do it before starting their busy days.

“I've already got my things in the car,” Leotis called out. “Would you like a ride?” He then laughed and began running in place to challenge her. “I'll give you another opportunity to break my record. Perhaps a fifth try will be the magic.”

“In your dreams, but thanks, as usual.” Sharvon ran down the sidewalk and into his driveway. “I plan on running only about an hour, so perhaps another time would be better to leave you gasping for breath.”

Leotis, with both hands on his hips, looked at Sharvon. He shook his head, laughing. “I guess any excuse is acceptable in this heat. I won't challenge your pride this time.”

“Oh, give me a break, Leotis,” Sharvon challenged. “I just saved your reputation. Besides, I've got two meetings at the firm this morning, and you know how crazy Fridays can get.”

“I know how crazy every day can get,” Leotis replied, taking her backpack from her hands. He gently placed it beside his gym bag on the backseat. “It's another reason why I gotta stay fit and prayed up.”

It didn't take them long to drive the mile to Barack Obama High School and park inside its lot. Like-minded runners were already rounding the oval track. Minutes after warming up with a few leg stretches, Leotis and Sharvon ran onto the field and blended in with the others. Neither spoke as they ran, preferring to let their challenging speeds and endurance speak for them. They'd just rounded the last lap of the fifth mile when Leotis's head jerked from a tap on his shoulder. He'd never seen her come up behind him, and he was certain Sharvon hadn't this time, either.

“I certainly didn't expect to see either of you out here this morning.” Ima's breathing was steady and even as she gently tapped Sharvon on her shoulder. “You guys have room for one more?”

Without waiting for an answer or a return greeting, Ima thrust her long and lean frame between Leotis and Sharvon. She had no problem keeping pace or keeping an eye on Leotis's quick glances tossed her way. She didn't bother looking at Sharvon, knowing that like most other women, she'd be jealous.

As the three slowly walked the last few feet to one of the benches where runners usually ended with a stretch routine, Sharvon spoke first. “Hello, Ima.” Without waiting for Ima to reply, she began stretching her long legs, before bending from the waist, showing her flexibility. “Leotis and I were just finishing.”

Ima didn't respond directly to Sharvon. Joining in the stretching exhibition, she looked at Leotis, who'd not said a word. She could tell he wasn't disappointed she'd joined them, because he'd not taken his eyes off her. Once she let him have, in her opinion, all his eyes and flesh could handle, with her back still to Sharvon, she purred, “Too bad.” As she raised one arm, then grabbed the elbow of the other, stretching from side to side, she added, “I'm just getting started.”

Leotis spoke, finally kicking aside the cat that had gotten his tongue. “Ima, it's a pleasure to see you again. I can tell you love to take care of your temple, like I do. I've got to take Sharvon home, but I'm certain we'll run into each other on the track again.” He'd said it as though it was a duty to take Sharvon home, and if he didn't have to, he'd stay right there with Ima.

“I'm sure we will,” Ima replied. “I was hoping it'd be sometime this week at the Health Nutt.” Ima stopped speaking for a moment, using the short pause to bend over, with her backside toward Sharvon, and pretend to tie her sneaker. Knowing Sharvon was still listening, Ima added, “I haven't had an opportunity to tell you just how much I enjoyed our lunch there the other day. It was my first time going there since they opened in Pelzer. You really showed me a good time, Reverend.”

The heat from Sharvon's eyes penetrated the side of Leotis's head. She was hot and wanted to singe his brain for what she thought was the dumbest move he could've made with Ima. She couldn't put the words together at that moment and didn't need to, since he'd already turned his head and looked away, but not before she'd seen his guilty look.

And just as quickly as Ima had appeared, instigating and insinuating, separating them as they sped around the race track, she strutted away, leaving her incendiary words to separate Leotis and Sharvon as they rode back to their houses.

As Leotis drove toward his home, with Sharvon still not speaking to him, the old saying “Quieter than cats jumping on cotton” came to mind. She sat in the backseat and slammed her backpack onto the floor and against the car door. He didn't have to look in his rearview mirror to tell her anger hadn't subsided one bit. He fumbled around with the radio dial, but somehow his satellite radio couldn't find a signal. As they neared their houses, he decided he'd not let the Devil win the day.

“Sharvon,” he began quickly, glancing in the rearview mirror to see if she even bothered to look his way without smirking. “I'm cutting to the chase. I don't want you to put more into what Ima said than need be.”

Sharvon glared at him but said nothing.

“You know the Health Nutt is one of my favorite places to grab a bite. It just happened that Ima had discovered it, too, and we sat down at the same table. Good food and random conversation were all we shared.”

Sharvon crossed her legs and her arms and continued glaring.

“I guess I probably should've shut down her insinuations as soon as she began revising the situation,” he said as he turned into his driveway and parked. “But I didn't think it'd bother you this much.”

Without saying good-bye, Sharvon snatched her backpack and flung it across her shoulder, then hopped out of Leotis's car and speed walked down his driveway, toward Sister Betty's house.

Leotis sat in his car and watched Sharvon storm through Sister Betty's side door. If she'd been surprised at the obvious flirtation coming from Ima, he was just as surprised at his reaction to her anger. He hadn't meant to hurt Sharvon, but then he hadn't thought she cared about him beyond being good friends.

“And this is why I gotta stay in my own lane and out of the oncoming traffic of these females,” he murmured as he exited his car and went inside his house.