Sink or Swim (8 page)

A
rumble goes through the room.

The prince looks at me in surprise. “Did she just leave?”

“Um …” It definitely seems like she did. “Maybe she had to pee or something?”

“She couldn’t have waited until after the wedding?”

“A girl’s gotta go when she’s gotta go,” I say, not really believing that:

1. I’m talking to a prince about pee or
   
2. Lana actually had to pee.
   

“Why don’t I go see what the issue is?” I say nervously. And then, without waiting for a response, I hurry back down the aisle — no time for heel-toe now — and run out of the ballroom.

Should I really check the bathrooms? I realize there’s no need to, because as soon as I step out of the ballroom, I see that the front door is wide open.

Lana left the palace. She’s officially a runaway bride.

I run right after her and spot her already at the shore, holding up her dress, up to her knees in the water.

“What are you doing?” I ask. “You’re supposed to be getting married!”

She shakes her head.

“You’re not getting married?”

She shakes her head again.

“But what about the prince?”

More shaking.

“But you know what this means! If he marries someone else, you’ll die!”

Her eyes fill with tears and she nods.

I pace up and down the sand. This is not good. Not good at all. If the prince does marry someone else, she’s in serious
trouble. We’re all in serious trouble, because that’s not a happy ending at all. That’s a terrible ending. That’s the same ending as the original ending! I take a deep breath and try to calm down. It’s not like he’s going to marry someone else
today
. We have some time to figure this out. Maybe the prince will learn to be less of a jerk and she’ll change her mind. Maybe we can find another prince that she would want to marry, and
that
would work instead.

I hear Jonah’s voice from the palace door. “Abby! What’s happening?”

I guess I have to tell them the wedding’s off. Had I known that canceling a wedding would be part of my maid-of-honor duties, I might not have been so excited about the job. “You stay here,” I say finally. “Don’t go in the water. I don’t want you drowning. I’m going to talk to Prince Mortimer.”

She closes her eyes in relief and I slowly make my way back to the palace.

Everyone looks up at me as I enter the ballroom.

“She better be coming now,” Prince Mortimer barks. His face is bright red. He looks furious.

“Um, I don’t think she is,” I say timidly from about halfway down the aisle.

“Darling, how long will she be?” the queen asks, checking her gold wristwatch.

“A pretty long time,” I say. “I think she wants to …” I have to just say it. “I think she wants to cancel the wedding.”

Several hundred gasps echo through the room. I wince.

“You’re kidding!”

“Cancel the wedding?”

“Not marry the prince?”

“Is she
crazy
?”

Prince Mortimer’s face falls. “I can’t believe she would do that to me,” he cries, looking genuinely pained.

As insensitive as he’s been, I can’t help but feel bad for him. No one wants to be left at the altar.

The queen jumps up. “How dare she run off like that!”

The king stands up beside her and turns to the crowd. “Dudes, we know you all came to see a royal a wedding today, and we
will
have a royal wedding today. Morty, there must be someone else here that you could marry.”

My heart stops. What? Is he kidding? He must be kidding.

The queen nods. “Yes! Princess Alison is here today. Morty, would you marry her?”

“Let me see her,” Prince Mortimer says.

The queen motions to Princess Alison. “Sweetie, will you stand up, please?”

Princess Alison stands up and curtsies. She has tight spiral curls and looks familiar. I know! She’s the girl from the school, the one who got help after we found Prince Mortimer on Crescent Beach! She’s the princess of Watermelon? Not surprisingly, she’s wearing a satiny red dress, with a green sash and green shoes.

The prince nods. “I’ll marry her. I like her hair. She’s pretty.”

The king claps. “Fantastic. Alison, would you like to marry our son?”

“Yeah, okay,” she says, twisting a curl around her finger and snapping her chewing gum. “He
is
cute.”

“And your parents? The king and queen of the kingdom of Watermelon? Do you agree to this union?”

“We do!” the king says, a big, smug smile on his face, a red-and-green checkered bow tie around his neck.

This isn’t happening. THIS ISN’T HAPPENING.

“This isn’t happening!” I yell.

Jonah tugs on my arm and whispers, “I’m pretty sure it
is
happening.”

“Great,” Prince Mortimer says. “Let’s start the music over.
Do you want to do the whole walk-down-the-aisle thing, or just come up?”

“I’ll just come up,” Princess Alison says. She maneuvers her way through the crowd, fluffs her dress, and begins walking down the remainder of the aisle. “Excuse me,” she says to Jonah and me as she squeezes past us.

“What a perfect match,” a woman sitting near us says. “She’s a princess, he’s a prince. He’s handsome, and she’s beautiful. They go together like French fries and mustard!”

“What is wrong with you people?” I shriek. “Mustard does not go on French fries! Ketchup goes on French fries! Ketchup! Or mayonnaise, in some countries. Or maybe a mixture of the two, if you’re into that. But not mustard! Never mustard!”

Everyone stares at me.

Am I losing it?

“I totally agree,” Jonah says. “C’mon, Abby, let’s go. We need to help Lana.”

Yes, we definitely need to help her. Because Prince Mortimer is marrying someone else, which means that Lana is going to DIE in the morning.

Unless we can save her.

W
e find Lana sitting on the sand, staring sadly into the sunset.

“You need to go talk to the sea witch,” I tell her. Lana needs to convince the witch to reverse the spell.

She points to her mouth and then her chest.

“You can’t breathe underwater,” I say.

She nods.

“Any way we can get the sea witch to come ashore?” I ask.

Lana shakes her head and shimmies her hand so it looks like a tail.

“She doesn’t have legs,” I confirm. “But she’s a witch; she can do whatever she wants.”

“She probably doesn’t want to come on land,” Jonah says. He can be annoyingly logical.

Argh! We have to fix this! We’re running out of time!

“Maybe Princess Alison won’t
really
marry Prince Mortimer,” Jonah says. “Maybe she’ll pull a Lana, and bolt at the last minute.”

Just then we hear loud clapping inside the palace and choruses of “Congratulations!”

“There goes that idea,” I mumble.

“Oh! Oh!” Jonah shrieks. “What about that potion Carolyn talked about? Remember? The one that her great-great-grandmother used to go underwater? The spit potion?”

I shake my head. “Do you think that even works?”

“Well, she should try it. What other choice do we have?”

He has a point.

We find Carolyn in the kitchen, slicing lemons.

“Remember that potion you said your great-great-grandmother used to go underwater?” I ask.

“How could I forget?” she says with a laugh.

“Do you know how to make it?”

“Do I remember the ingredients? Of course I do. Mermaid’s spit, a tablespoon of sea salt, three fish eggs, a tablespoon of water, a teaspoon of club soda, and a pinch of algae. I’ve always wanted to make it, but finding the mermaid’s spit has been difficult.”

“We have the spit,” I say. “We need some potion so Lana can go underwater.”

“Of course,” she says, putting down her knife. “Anything for my favorite mermaid.”

She gathers all the stuff from the kitchen, mixes it up in a glass, and then runs with us outside and hands the glass to Lana. Lana spits inside, then takes a sip. Then she turns and hurries into the ocean, diving underwater. Two seconds later she pops up, gasping and shaking her head.

“I guess it doesn’t work,” I say.

“Maybe now that Lana has legs, her spit isn’t mermaid-y anymore,” Carolyn says.

Lana leans over and carves into the sand: “I DON’T HAVE A TAIL BUT I WILL ALWAYS BE A MERMAID.”

“In that case,” Jonah says, “maybe a mermaid can’t use her own spit. Or maybe the spell only works on humans.”

“Lana’s a human,” I say.

Carolyn shakes her head. “She’s a mermaid. She just said so herself.”

Jonah tugs on my hand. “You know what that means, right? It might work on us.”

Huh? “Us?”

“Us,” he repeats. “We’re human.”

“
I
am, yes. I’m not always so sure about you.”

“Seriously, Abby.
We’ll
try the potion.”

“I doubt it will work,” I say, my heart hammering.

“I bet it will,” he says. “We’ll get to breathe underwater! It’ll be fun!”

“Sharks. Waves. Salt in our mouths. That doesn’t sound like fun. And it’s going to be dark soon. How will we see anything?” I can’t do it. I just can’t.

“Don’t you have a light on your watch?” he asks.

“Yeah.” As if one probably-waterproof-watch light is enough for me to go up against the entire ocean.

“Let’s just try. It’s our only chance.”

“Are there any other options?” I ask, my voice squeaky. “There must be. Maybe Carolyn wants to try it?”

Carolyn shakes her head. “Me? Are you crazy? I eat shark. I don’t let them eat me!”

“You eat shark?” Jonah asks, eyes wide.

She nods. “I’ll make it for you. It’s delicious.”

“No thanks,” we say in unison.

Jonah looks at me. “I think it’s up to us, then. Let’s do it!”

Goose bumps cover my whole body. He wants me to go underwater. No life jacket. No air.

I can’t. I can’t. I can’t.

I
have
to.

Slowly I nod.

Lana hands Jonah the cup.

“Cheers!” Jonah cries, and takes a big sip. “It tastes like sushi!”

I roll my eyes. “Have you ever even had sushi?”

“No, but I bet this is what it tastes like. It could use some ketchup.” When Jonah’s done, he hands me the cup and scurries toward the water, diving right in.

“Wait, Jonah!” I yell, but it’s too late. He’s under.

He pops up. “It works! It really works!”

“Great. Just, um, great!” My hands shake. Before I sip, I ask, “But how will we ever find the sea witch?”

“Lana can make us a map,” Jonah calls.

Carolyn takes a pen and paper out of her apron and hands it to Lana. “Here you go.”

Lana starts to sketch. When she’s done, she writes “2 HOURS” on top.

“It’ll take us two hours to get there?” I ask.

Lana nods.

That’s a long time for us to be swimming. Two hours to the sea witch’s place, two hours back, plus how long to convince the witch to help us? At least we have twelve hours to work with.

“Bottoms up,” Carolyn says.

I nod, and then I swallow a gulp of the potion. I almost gag. But I keep swallowing because I have to.

P.S. My brother’s not wrong — a little ketchup
would
go a long way.

I hand Lana the glass and then carefully wade into the water. The
dark
water. This can’t be a good idea. I barely swim well during the day; how am I going to swim well at night?

“Just dunk!” Jonah orders me.

I bristle at being bossed around by my baby brother, but I know he’s right. Getting into the water is like taking off a Band-Aid. It always hurts less to just rip it off. I’m in up to my waist. I should go under now.

Okay,
now
.

“Time is ticking,” Jonah calls. “I’m going under again!”

“Jonah, hold on!” I yell, but then he disappears under the surf. At first I see bubbles rise to the surface but then they stop.

I don’t like bubbles that stop. My heart feels like it might pound out of my chest.

Now I have no choice. I grip the map in my hand, hold my nose with the other, seal my eyes shut, and go under.

Cold, cold, cold! I carefully open my left eye. At first it’s blurry, but then it clears up. This is a hopeful sign. It doesn’t sting or anything. I open the right eye.

Around me I see blue. Lots and lots of navy blue. I’m glad the sun isn’t completely gone yet.

“Hi!” Jonah says, swimming over to me. “How cool is this? We can talk!”

I am afraid to open my mouth in case I swallow a gallon of water and drown. But I do it. I open my lips in a little circle and take a tiny breath in. I do not choke.

“It works!” I say, amazed. I have no idea
how
it works, but it is working. I am breathing and talking underwater. No scuba equipment necessary.

I thought I would sink to the bottom, but I’m not. I’m just floating. It’s like I’m in one of those gravity-less spaceships and I can go up or down or anywhere I want.

We swim farther into the deep.

There are brightly colored fish swimming in all directions. A family of turtles meanders by us. And coral is everywhere. It looks like pipe cleaners gently blowing in the wind. Yellow, red, orange, blue, green. The water doesn’t even feel cold anymore, just like a really nice bath.

Jonah is having the time of his life. He’s laughing, somersaulting. He’s even yodeling. Does he really have to let every sea creature know we’re here?

“Can you try to be quiet?” I ask him, as a neon fish that’s shaped like a trumpet smashes its nose against my knee. It does not seem to like me.

“Why? This is awesome.”

“Jonah! This is serious business! You’ve been acting like a two-year-old since we got here!”

“You’ve been acting like a forty-year-old!” he snaps back. “This is supposed to be fun.”

“No, it isn’t!” I yell back as the trumpet fish goes after my big toe. “We’re helping Lana.”

“Why can’t helping Lana be fun?”

“Because … because … You’re impossible,” I say, and turn my back on him. “Let’s go to the sea witch and get this over
with.” We have to stay on schedule. We have to see the sea witch. But first we have to
find
the sea witch.

I pull the map up to my eyes. Unfortunately, the map has disintegrated in the water.

“Crumbs!” I yell.

Jonah turns back to me. “What’s wrong?”

“Unlike us, the map was not waterproof.”

He bites his lower lip. “I think I remember the way. Follow me.”

“You think, or you
know
?”

He shrugs. “I think.”

“Time is ticking, Jonah!”

“Well,” he says, swimming forward, “then we’d better get kicking.”

I nervously follow Jonah through seaweed, around coral, and over a cave. I feel bad for snapping at him, but honestly, he doesn’t take anything seriously.

By now the water has started to get dark. Really dark. I press the light on my watch to illuminate our path and pray that the batteries don’t die.

We swim for what feels like at least another hour.

I could really use a snack. That sushi potion was just not enough. I wish I’d had time to pack a picnic lunch from the wedding buffet. I’m going to miss that lemon meringue pie.

At the end of the cave, Jonah turns left and points.

“That’s it,” he says.

I shine my light up ahead. I have no doubt that he’s right. If someone asked me to design a sea witch’s house, this is what I’d create.

The walls are gray stone and covered in black sea-sludge. The path to the doorway is surrounded by barracudas and floating fish skeletons. There’s a low moaning sound all around us. Jonah slows down and takes my hand.

“Maybe we should find a doorbell or something. The sea witch might not be the type of person who likes to be surprised.” I see a big knocker in the shape of a human skull. With a trembling hand, I bang the knocker against the door.

Slowly the door creeps open.

“Come in,” we hear. The voice is definitely female, but low and raspy.

We swim through the entranceway, terrified.

There she sits in the middle of the room. Well, not sits. Lies
sideways on a black couch. She is not what I expected at all. She’s beautiful. She’s a mermaid just like Lana, but her tail is dark purple instead of green and orange. She’s younger than I expected, too — she looks about my mom’s age. She has black, waist-length hair.

Beside the couch is a large gray pot. No, it’s not a pot. It’s a cauldron. It’s made of stone, and bubbles are steaming out of it. It looks like a hot tub — but a really, really scary one. I do not want to go anywhere near that cauldron if I can help it. I take a step back.

“Who are you?” the sea witch drawls. Her voice is smoky. It makes me want to move closer, but I resist.

“I’m-I’m-I’m Abby,” I stutter. “And this is my brother, Jonah.”

“Hello,” she says. “I’m Nelly.”

I nod. “We’re here on behalf of Lana. I’m her —” I pause. “I’m her lawyer.”

The sea witch cackles. “Her lawyer? Lana has a lawyer?”

I nod. “And I’m here to negotiate a deal.”

“How are you even down here? Did you take the underwater potion?”

We nod.

Nelly laughs again. “Well, you’d better start negotiating before your time runs out.”

“Right.” I nervously clear my throat. It’s been about two hours, which means we have ten hours left. We can convince her to help us in ten hours, can’t we? “We would like you to reverse the spell you put on Lana,” I say, my voice trembling.

She raises a perfectly arched eyebrow. “Which one?”

I half smile. “All of them?”

“Let’s see,” Nelly says. “There’s the spell that changed her tail into legs. There’s the spell that took away her voice. Then there’s the spell that says that if the prince marries anyone else, she’ll die before the next sunrise, which is at six oh five
A.M
.”

“All of them would be good,” I say. “But the dying one is definitely our priority.”

“Reversing spells isn’t cheap. What will you give me?”

I clear my throat. “What do you want?” Oops. This may have been a tiny oversight on my part. I came to negotiate with the sea witch but I didn’t bring anything to trade. Never mind being a failed maid of honor — I’m a failed lawyer, too.

Nelly eyes Jonah. “The boy?”

Jonah scoots into my side.

“Um, no.” Even though we’re kind of in a fight, she still can’t have my brother. “Is there anything else you want?”

She looks me over. “What is that on your wrist?”

I look down. “You want my watch? I can give you my watch.” Not that I really want to give away my watch, but of course I’ll do it to save Lana’s
life
. I’m not sure how we’ll find our way back to the shore without any light, though. I guess I’ll worry about that problem later.

The sea witch nods. “Here’s my offer. You give me the watch.”

“Okay,” I say. Maybe this won’t be so hard after all.

“And in return for the watch, I’ll give you a knife. You’ll use the knife to stab the prince in the heart. Then I’ll undo all the spells. Lana can go back to her life as a mermaid.”

Is she kidding me?

“Um, that’s not going to work, either,” I say. “I am not going to kill someone.” Sure, the prince is a bit of a jerk, but that doesn’t mean I want him dead. And that definitely doesn’t mean that I would ever consider killing him. I want to
be
a lawyer, not
need
a lawyer. “Can’t I just give you the watch, and you’ll reverse the spells?”

She snorts. “Reverse all the spells for one measly watch? No. One of you stabs the prince, or nothing. You know what? I don’t
even want a watch. The girl and I had a deal. She’s the one who wasn’t satisfied with her life even though she had
everything
. She had family who loved her! She was a princess! She was beautiful! But no, no, no, she wanted to give it all up to be
human
. She’s a jerk! Just like her father!”

“But she wasn’t happy!” I say. “She risked everything for a different life. She’s not a jerk. She’s … she’s … brave! And you’re a coward. You just hide in your cave and steal from people. You want everyone to be as miserable as you are.”