Sinful (21 page)

Jensen heard the emotion in Maymi’s voice when she spoke about Hudson. He could tell that she had loved him very much. “How long did the two of you date?” he asked, trying to get her to open up to him some more.

“We dated for about five years. I loved him so much. He was so supportive of my career that when I decided to drop out of medical school and attend pastry school he was right there at my side through it all, even when my father told me it would be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made in my life.

“His words had literally crushed me, but Hudson told me to live my life for me and not him. I was hurt until he spoke those words to me and I realized he was telling me the truth.”

“Why wasn’t your father supportive of your career change?” he asked,

“My father believed I wouldn’t have enough longevity with being a sweets chef as he called it. He’s a very successful plastic surgeon back in Atlanta, Georgia. He always wanted me and my siblings to follow in his footsteps especially after my mother’s death.”

Maymi talked about her father almost like he was someone else’s parent instead of her own. He couldn’t believe her father wasn’t supportive of his daughter’s dreams. So what, she decided not to become a doctor like him. He still should have given her his unconditional encouragement with whatever she wanted to do with her time and energy.

“Did your father approve of your relationship with Hudson?”

Easing back from him on the bed, Maymi stared at him with a tense expression. “No, he didn’t approve of it. In fact, he hated it and told me several times I should break things off with Hudson.”

“Why?”

“Hudson was my father’s business partner, like his second-in-command when it came to doing surgeries. The day I met Hudson at the florist, he had just gotten hired by my father. I didn’t know how they worked in the same space everyday with each other and got anything done.

“If Hudson hadn’t been the most talented plastic surgeon in Atlanta, my dad would have fired him in the blink of an eye. However, he was getting too many patients and needed an extra pair of hands to take care of all of their needs. He wasn’t about to lose money out of pride.

“My boyfriend was so amazing. Hudson never allowed working with my father to stand in the way of our relationship. We were making plans to get married the day of his accident.”

Jensen noticed tears filling up Maymi’s eyes as she moved away from him on the bed. He hadn’t wanted to bring back bad memories. But he couldn’t move on and have any kind of a future with her if he didn’t know everything about her past including the good and bad.

“If you don’t want to talk about him anymore, we can drop it,” he said, reaching for her but she slid away from his touch and got out of the bed.

Grabbing a sheet off the bed, Maymi wrapped it around her body and walked over to her bedroom window. She started out into the darkness putting some distance between her and Jensen. He had brought so many memories to the surface tonight. She wasn’t thinking about telling him about Hudson when she invited him over here tonight, but here she was remembering him.

Could she really find another man in the world who was anything like him
?

Chapter Thirty-One

Jensen tried not to be hurt at Maymi’s sudden withdrawal after the night they had spent together, because he could sense the barely controlled pain that was coiled in her body. When she moved away from his touch, he felt an extraordinary void that he didn’t want to experience again from her.

Getting out of the bed, he snatched his jeans off the floor and slid them on before slowly making his way over to Maymi standing at the window. He stood behind her, but made sure not to touch her. He couldn’t recall the last time he truly desired to take someone else’s pain away as much as he did Maymi’s tonight.

“Sweetheart, how did Hudson die?” he asked, gently.

She pulled the sheet tighter around her body then brushed a tear away from her eye with the back of her hand. The sight of her tears made his heart clinch tighter.

“Hudson loved motorcycles. I mean, he had a passion for them. He owned about six of them and was looking into buying another one for his collection. He spent most of his Saturdays outside working on them while I was inside testing out new recipes.

“I didn’t mind it, because I realized it was something he was into before I came into his life. The one he loved the most was his 1984 Harley Davidson FXST Softail. He would take it out any chance he got, but we were constantly arguing about him not wearing a helmet. I never understood how a brilliant surgeon could be so dense.”

“Did he tell you why he wasn’t fond of wearing one?”

“In his macho opinion, it wasn’t something cool to do. I was tired of hearing that same excuse over and over. We got into a huge shouting match one day about it before he went out on his Harley. I told him that he was going to regret not listening to me. He came back with, maybe something would happen to prove me right,” Maymi said, choking out the last of the words.

Not being able to take it anymore, Jensen wrapped his hands around her shoulders pulling her back against his chest. He’d tried not touching her, but it was too much for him to handle. He just had to do it.

“Baby, tell me what happened,” he whispered against the back of her head.

“He had gotten about five blocks from our house when a car ran a red light and clipped the back tire on his motorcycle. The impact threw him from the bike and the car smashed into a tree a few feet away.

“Somehow, Hudson found the strength to get up and make his way over to the three teenagers inside the car. He got all of them out and pulled them to safety before the vehicle caught on fire, but a few minutes later he collapsed and died at the hospital an hour later,” she said, holding back fresh tears.

“How did you find out about all of this?” Jensen asked, spinning Maymi around so he could look into her eyes.

“One of the teenagers in the car he saved felt guilty about the accident and told one of the officers the truth. While I was at the hospital waiting to hear news about Hudson he came there and told me.

“I should have never said anything to him. He had been riding for over fifteen years without one accident. The day I told him something bad would happen, it did. I got him killed and I’ll never forgive myself.” Maymi lowered her head as her tears continued falling down her cheeks.

At first, Jensen was too stunned by her confession to take it seriously and then he saw Maymi was seriously blaming herself for the accident. She had nothing to do with Hudson’s death.

“Maymi, look at me. I’m going to tell you something and I want you to hear me loud and clear.”

At the sound of his voice, she lifted her head and looked at him. He could see the devastation in her eyes and it pained him she had been holding on to this guilt for so long.

“Baby, what you told Hudson had nothing to do with his accident. You only told him the truth and unfortunately, he didn’t listen to your warning. If he had been riding without a helmet for years, nothing you told him was going to stop his behavior.”

“I don’t know if I believe you.” She showed her disbelief in the tone of her voice. “I think I put a jinx on him or something.”

Brushing her tears away with the pads of his thumbs, Jensen touched Maymi’s chin forcing her to continue staring at him. “You need to believe me because it’s the truth. You told me more than once how much Hudson loved you. Would he have wanted you to spend all of this time holding onto this blame?”

“No, he wouldn’t have,” Maymi answered in a soft voice. “He would’ve told me to mourn him for a second then move on with my life. He wasn’t big on allowing the past to determine the future.”

“I think he had the right advice for you,” Jensen said, sliding his hand underneath the sheet covering Maymi’s body. “I want you to live in the moment with me.”

“I want to do the same thing,” she said, looking at him with a little less sadness in her eyes.

She touched the side of his face with her hand and then ran her finger across his bottom lip. “I’m really beginning to like you a lot. You’re a better man than I first gave you credit for.”

He grabbed her hand kissing the tips of her five fingers. “You know what I’m beginning to think? That you’re something pretty special yourself,” he confessed.

Gathering her into his arms, he held her snugly. His body leaped to life just from the mere touch of Maymi’s body against his. However, now wasn’t the time for them to make love. She needed him to comfort her in a different way.

“Come back to bed with me,” Jensen said, removing his hands from her body. He grabbed her hand pulling her back towards the unmade bed.

“Jensen, I’m not in the mood to do anything,” Maymi said, stopping him halfway there.

Turning, he looked down into her face seeing the perplexing emotions there on display. “I won’t lie. I would love to make love to you, but I think you need something else more now. So, come with me,” he said again, tugging her towards the bed.

He got on first and scooted over before tugging Maymi down on the bed until she lay down next to him. He wrapped his arm pulling her to his body until they were cuddling.

“Baby, all I want you to do is relax and go to sleep. You opened up a lot to me tonight about Hudson. I know it had to take a lot out of you.”

Maymi placed her hand on top of his squeezing his fingers. “Thank you for listening. I really hadn’t talked openly about Hudson with anyone,” she told him.

Her confession wrapped around him like a warm blanket. He was entirely caught up in his own emotions tonight as he began to feel some tangible bond forming between them.

“Sweetheart, you’re welcome,” Jensen answered.

Yet, Maymi didn’t answer him. Instead he heard the soft sounds of her breathing. Jensen brushed her hair off the side of her neck planting a kiss below her earlobe. As she slept in the bed with him, he thought about where the next step of their relationship was going. He was positive he was more ready to see where it would go between them than her.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Early the next morning, Maymi sat at the kitchen table watching Jensen as he fixed them some breakfast. He was only wearing a pair of low fitting jeans that made his ass look absolutely perfect in her eyes. The muscles in his back moved every time he reached for something on the counter.

“I’ve never had scrambled egg whites with spinach before for breakfast,” she admitted. “I’m not too sure if I’m going to like it. I’m more of a traditional pancakes and bacon lover. You know, the classics.”

Jensen stopped what he was doing and looked at her. The sight of his bare chest had her squirming around in the kitchen chair.

“I’m hoping you will be willing to give it a fair chance. It’s very healthy for you packed with a lot of nutrition.”

Maymi glanced down at her body covered in Jensen’s white shirt from last night. “Are you saying my body needs some help? I’ve never gotten any complaints about it before,” she said.

Turning down the burner, Jensen moved away from the stove and came over to her. He moved her legs apart and stepped between them.

“Baby, your body is sexy as hell,” he praised, running his hands over her breasts stopping to play with her nipples.

“Oh,” she moaned, softly leaning into him.

“Did I have a problem with your body last night and less than twenty minutes ago,” he whispered against her lips.

“No,” Maymi answered, staring at Jensen.

“Good, don’t ever doubt how much I want you,” he said, stepping back. “But, I like your company just as much. You make me more relaxed than I’ve been in a very long time with a woman.” Jensen winked at her then went back over to the stove and worked on finishing up their meal.

“Tell me more about your life. I don’t know that much about you. What are your hobbies, interests? What gets you excited?”

“I told you one of them on our date,” he answered, taking the food off the stove.

He divided it up on two plates next to him and then sprinkled a little low fat cheese before bringing them over to the table.

“I still get a lot of comfort from staring at the stars. I believe it comes from the memories it brings up of my father.” Jensen placed one plate in front of her and then took one before sitting down.

“Were you always close to your father?” Maymi asked then took a bite of her food.

She couldn’t believe how good it tasted on her tongue. Who knew spinach for breakfast could be this tasty?

“He was my best friend. Casper was closer to our mother and I loved her as well, but I could tell my father anything. He was my biggest supporter,” Jensen said then took a bite of his food.

“It must have been nice. Do you not have one bad memory of him?”

He swallowed before answering her. “I can’t say that I do. Whenever I asked him something he gave me his full attention no matter how dumb the question might have been.”

“Do you think you were your father’s favorite?”

“Not at all, he gave me and Casper the same amount of attention. My brother never felt left out of anything we did together. My family was the best when I was growing up. Both of my parents are gone now, but I still miss them each and every day.

“When did they die?”

“I was a freshman in high school when my mother died and my dad lived long enough to see me graduate from college. I’m so thankful I had both of them for so long.”

For the next several minutes, Maymi and Jensen continued eating in silence as both of them got lost in their own personal thoughts of their pasts. Neither wanted to think about memories, but they kept rushing back into their minds.

Placing her fork down on the plate, Maymi pushed it away and studied Jensen for a few minutes. “Finish telling me about yourself,” she said, watching him closely.

Last night, she had opened up the deepest part of her soul to him. How could she not want him to give her a sneak peek into his as well?

Raising his head, he watched her thoughtfully for a moment. His eyes searched her face like he was reaching into her thoughts to figure out what she wanted him to tell her. “What do you want to know?” he asked, wiping his mouth was a napkin. “I thought I had told you about me already.”