Simply Complicated (11 page)

Her first patient was a fourteen-year-old girl who tried to kill herself by cutting her wrist. Her second patient was a twenty-seven-year-old female who tried to kill herself by taking an overdose of sleeping pills.

Her intake report read that when the police found her she was still alert but it was obvious she had taken an overdose of something.

It also stated that her four-month-old infant son was in stable condition. His belly had to be pumped because his mother allegedly gave him an overdose of sleeping pills.

When Monica read this she felt so sorry for the woman and baby. She had seen a lot of people come into the psychiatric hospital for a variety of reasons but this was her first time having a mother who tried to kill herself and her baby.

Monica knew when the patient was discharged from the hospital, she was going to be charged with attempted murder. The patient’s name on the chart read
Susan Johnson
.

Monica went into Susan’s room to check on her. She was asleep so she went to attend to her other patients. About an hour and a half had passed and it was almost time for the other nurse to come into work.

Monica decided that she would give the other nurse the two new patients who came in for suicide attempts and she would take the two schizophrenics. Until then she would have to check on all twenty-five patients on the ward by herself.

Monica looked into Susan’s room to see if she had awoken, and could hear her crying. She walked in and asked the disconsolate patient if she needed some water.

Susan had no idea that Monica was Ken’s wife. When they passed at the ob/gyn’s office, she only saw the back of her head.

Monica wiped Susan’s tears and pulled the covers over her. She offered if Susan needed to talk all she had to do was buzz and Monica would be there.

“Do you know how my son is doing? I mean is he still alive?” Susan asked.

“According to your intake papers, he’s doing fine,” she said.

“I am so embarrassed about this situation. Things were never supposed to end up this way!” Susan cried hysterically.

“You need to calm down. Why did you try to take your son’s life?” asked Monica.

“Since having the baby I’ve been so depressed. My son’s father is married and wants nothing to do with us. He threw us away like a piece of trash. I wish I had never gotten involved with him. I should have stayed with my last boyfriend, Jeff.”

“Why did you get involved with someone married? Most of those relationships never last,” replied Monica.

“The affair seemed like the right thing to do in the beginning but then I fell in love with him and everything went crazy.

“He promised to leave his family for me but then later told me that he didn’t mean it. I know we’re soul mates and destined to be together despite his being married. I was hoping getting pregnant and having his child would help him to see it too,” said Susan.

Monica took a deep breath, “I’m not trying to judge you, but your mistake was sleeping with a man who already belonged to someone else.”

Before they could finish their conversation, the second nurse entered the room. Monica told Susan she needed to go.

Monica assigned the nurse to look after Susan and the other suicide patient. She never went back into Susan’s room.

When Monica got home she was exhausted. After leaving the hospital she had to pick Marci up from school and stop by the grocery store. Since their new house was far away from her favorite stores, she always tried to get everything she needed in one trip.

Ken arrived shortly after Monica. He told her he had a long day and wanted to take a shower and unwind in his den. He kissed her and Marci and then went to shower.

He couldn’t help but think about what Jake told him about Susan earlier that day. He tried contacting her on her cell phone but it kept going to voicemail. He didn’t have any other number or anyone he could call to see about his son.

Monica called Ken and Marci to dinner. As they ate she began to tell him about her day. She talked about being the only nurse there for two hours and then shared details about her patients.

Normally she didn’t discuss her patients but she had been thinking about Susan and how she tried to kill her child. Ken was not really paying attention to what she was saying; he was still thinking about his son.

“Are you listening to me? Did you even hear what I was saying?”
she exclaimed, sensing his distraction
.

“I’m sorry dear; I have a lot on my mind. Go ahead—I’m listening now,” he said.

“As I was saying, I had a female patient that came in today who attempted to kill herself and her child last night. I was assigned to her temporarily because no one else was there.

“How could someone try and kill their child? While talking to Ms. Johnson, I learned she had been severely depressed because her child’s father suddenly abandoned them. I feel sorry for her because she said she has no one to turn to,” she said.

When Ken heard her say the name Ms. Johnson, he started choking over his food.

“Are you okay?” Monica asked.

“I’m fine. How’s she doing? Is her baby okay?” Ken asked, trying not to seem overly concerned.

“She’ll live but she’s clinically depressed. The baby is in the hospital and I’m not sure how well he’s doing. I do know he will probably go into foster care if her family or the father doesn’t try to get him,” she said.

She wondered about this sudden interest in her patient. “Why so many questions, Ken?”

“You said I wasn’t paying attention earlier and I wanted you to know that I’m listening,” he replied.

Monica grew suspicious.
Could Ken be the married man she was involved with? Could this be why he’s been acting strange and distant over the past couple years?
She began to wonder.

Then it dawned on her that if he was the baby’s father, his lover might have been the person who threw the brick through the window of their former home.

But would Ken treat a woman as badly as Susan claims her lover treated her? Would he abandon his son and not visit him?

All of these thoughts ran through her mind. She didn’t want to jump to any conclusions but started getting worried. She hoped he would not cheat on her and risk losing everything.

She wanted to ask him if he knew a Susan Johnson but she was afraid of what his answer would be so decided not to. She hoped he would say something to her if he were the married man she was talking about.

He could tell that something was going through Monica’s mind because she didn’t say anything else during dinner. He started wondering if she knew of his affair with Susan and was mentioning her hospitalization to see how he would respond.

He thought it a little strange that she would share Susan’s situation with him. This was the most she had ever revealed about her patients and this was the first time she disclosed a patient’s name.

He still planned on telling her about his affair but he just couldn’t do it, especially since she was carrying their second child. She sensed that he wanted to tell her something but she wasn’t prepared to deal with it that night. They were both silent, preoccupied with their suspicions.

“I’m tired. I think I’ll go to bed after I clean the kitchen,” she said.

He was relieved because he knew confessing would hurt her and he didn’t want to upset her while Marci was home.

“Go to bed, sweetheart, I’ll clean the kitchen tonight.”

When Monica went upstairs, he wrote her a letter explaining everything that happened between him and Susan. He went into his den to write his confession.

My dearest Monica,

I love you and Marci with all my heart and I never meant to hurt you. I wanted to talk to you in person, but I just couldn’t face you.

I know writing seems like the easy way out and frankly, it’s the only way I am able to tell you what happened without breaking down.

I have something I must explain. If after you read this letter you want me to leave I will certainly understand. I guess you know by now that something has been going on with me that caused me to act differently or out of character. The truth is I had an affair with another woman for nearly fifteen months.

I know you are probably wondering why I had an affair. The truth is I really do not know. You’re a good woman and you did not deserve any of this.

Knowing that I betrayed you by cheating and breaking our wedding vows is killing me and has been for some time.

When you first confronted me about something being different I should have told you then how I was feeling. Maybe, if I had told you what was going on inside of my head, we would not be here today, in pain.

I know you have a lot of questions and I’ll try to give you some answers. She and I met on a Friday night when Jake and I and some of the guys from work went out to celebrate the new client we acquired.

After dinner and a few drinks we were about to leave when a woman approached me. She thought she knew me but soon realized she did not.

Do you remember when Jake invited us to the party he had for his clients, but you stayed home to be with Marci? Well, she was there and we started talking.

Everything between us was purely platonic for about five months. We would occasionally talk on the telephone about investments and other things.

I don’t know how we became intimate. You must believe me when I say that I never meant for any of this to happen. I was a fool and an idiot to cheat on you. You and Marci are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I don’t want to lose you.

The affair lasted longer than it should have. When I broke it off with her she became angry. She was the person who threw a brick through our window.

Anyway, every time I wanted to tell you I could not bring myself to do it. She meant nothing to me. I never loved her. It has always been you that I love.

After I told her to stop calling me, she told me she was pregnant with my child. Naturally I did not believe her because I knew she would say anything if she thought it would get me to leave you and Marci.

We used protection every time. I told her that once the baby was born that I wanted to take a paternity test.

The baby was born about four months ago and the results for the paternity test came back a few weeks after he was born. I am so sorry but the baby is mine. His name is Kenneth Adam Thomas.

That night you told me you were pregnant was the evening I had decided I was going to tell you everything but after hearing about our baby, I changed my mind. I wanted that night to be special for the both of us.

I saw that night as a chance for us to start all over. I saw it as a new beginning. This is why I wanted to move. I knew I had a lot of making up to do to you and Marci and I honestly thought a new house and a new baby could do it.

After we moved into our new home, she no longer called me nor tried to get in touch with me. I took this as a sign that she finally understood that it was over. A month had passed and she had not called. I knew running away was not going to make things go away but I was willing to try.

Prior to our move I tried helping her out with the baby as much as I could. Do you remember that day when you tried to reach me after your doctor’s appointment? Well, I was at her place watching the baby. I was only trying to do what was right by the baby. You have to believe me.

Anyway, when I woke up this morning I felt really bad. I had put myself into a bad situation and too many innocent people were being affected: you, Marci and Kenneth. None of you deserve to be mistreated or hurt and therefore tonight was the night I had planned to tell you.

When I arrived to work this morning, Jake told me that he received a call from her yesterday stating that since she could not have me that she was going to kill herself and if I didn’t get the baby, she was going to kill him also.

She had not made any contact with me in about a month. I had no idea she would go this far. Tonight when you mentioned your patient at the hospital who attempted suicide and tried to kill her son, I immediately thought of her and when you said Ms. Johnson, I was certain it was Susan.

I know you’re angry and feel betrayed. But I don’t feel it’s right for Kenneth to end up in foster care because of my foolish mistakes. Because of the type of woman I know you are, I know you agree with me.

There is a good chance that Susan will end up in prison for trying to kill the baby and I want to at least try to get custody of him so he can grow up with a father.

I know I’m asking a lot from you and I want you to know that whatever happens, I do understand. I know you are going to need some time to take this all of this in.

I was going to leave tonight and be gone when you wake in the morning but I wanted to lie next to you and hold you, I hope not for the last time.

Again, I am truly sorry and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me and give me another chance to make things right. I do not want to lose you but right now I know I do not have the right to ask you to stay. I would like to call you in a few days if it is okay with you.

Love Always

After writing his confession, Ken went to their bedroom and held his wife very tightly. He knew once she read his letter, things were going to change and he wasn’t sure if he would ever be given the chance to hold her again.

The next day he told Monica and Marci that he loved them very much. He then kissed them goodbye and headed to work. When he arrived, he told Jake about Susan and the letter he left for Monica.

Jake couldn’t believe he actually told his wife. He asked Ken about his next steps and Ken simply told him that he was going to wait and see what his wife would do but first he was going to the hospital to see his son.