Shoulda Been A Cowboy (9 page)

“
But that's not entirely true. I've
never been in this situation before.”

“
What situation is that?”

“
Asking you for something.”

“
You afraid I'll deny you?”

Domini shrugged. “Given our past…situation,
maybe I am a little afraid you'll think I'm weird for
what I want.”

Cam reached out to reassure her, but thought better of
it. Now was the time for talking, not touching. “Try me.”

“
It's about sex. At least, I'm
assuming we're going to have sex.”

Sweet Jesus. Hopefully she wasn't one of those
stump fetish freaks who could only get off with amputees. He'd
never been with a woman like that, but lots of guys he'd met at
the VA talked about being approached by women—and men—with
that bizarre fetish. “So if I say, yes, I'm ready to nail
you right now…you'd say?”

“
Yes.” She removed her sunglasses and locked
her gaze to his. “I'd say what I really want is for you
to take control of me during sex. Just like you did last night when
you handcuffed me, pushed me to my knees and made me suck you off.”

His heart began to race. “You liked that?”

“
Yes. A lot.”

“
Why?”

“
I've never been able to really let go in
any kind of sexual situation.”

“
Why not?”

“
I used to think it was because I was with a
church organization for a lot of years and they taught us sex—wanting
it, doing it—was totally wrong. But my real problem is I worry
too much I won't measure up because I'm so inexperienced.
And if you haven't realized it yet, I'm also shy.”

Cam smiled. “Really? I hadn't noticed.”

Domini rolled her eyes. “So I've always
fantasized about finding a man who will take away my choice, who
won't let me be shy about any aspect of sex. A man who will
command me to please him and myself, but who won't physically
hurt me.”

“
You looking at playing master and slave? The boot
licking, collar-wearing type of role-playing and pretend
punishments?”

“
No. I just…don't want to have to
think about sex. I want to surrender my body to a man who pushes me
to my sexual limits so I can experience the ultimate pleasure and
give it back to him in return any way he wants it.”

“
Have you ever been in this type of sexual
relationship?”

“
No. I haven't had many lovers.”

“
How many?”

“
Three.”

It figured. Domini was as innocent as he'd feared.
“So if you've had little sexual experience or exposure to
a dominant male, how do you know so much about this?”

Color tinged her cheeks. “I don't…well…besides
reading romance novels with a bit of a domination theme. I realized
that type of sexual relationship was what I was looking for.”

“
Submissive?”

She nodded.

“
Say the word. If you want to be submissive to me,
you'll say it.”

“
Submissive.”

“
So if you're submissive, that makes me…?”

“
Dominant.”

“
Exactly. Do you know what it means to be under
the rule of a dominant male, Domini?”

“
No. But I know you'll teach me. I
want
you to teach me.”

That little remark made his dick hard. “You wanna
know why I stayed away from you? Because I couldn't imagine
you—sweet, kind, timid Domini—letting me have my way with
you however I wanted. Letting me fuck your mouth, your cunt, your
ass. I couldn't fathom you'd be willing to let me call
the shots and play rough.”

“
How rough?”

“
I'd never use my rougher edges as an excuse
to hurt you. Spanking your ass with my hand is one thing, making you
bleed by punching you in the face falls into a whole nother realm.

“
For example.” He leaned forward, using his
voice as a lure. “If I wanna handcuff you to my bed all night
or all day, I will. If I wanna fuck you against the truck, I will. If
I want you to go down on me in my patrol car when no one else is
around, you will. If you agree to this, my rules are simple. Any
time, any place, any position I say, you say, ‘yes'.”

“
Yes.”

He bit back a growl of approval. “You oughta know
I'm beyond demanding when it comes to getting what I need from
my lover.”

“
Have you been in a relationship like this
before?”

Cam debated on how much to tell her. But if he expected
honesty from her, he'd better reciprocate. “Yes, I've
been in several. Not since—”
I
lost my leg and my nerve,
“—my
injury.”

Domini regarded him pensively. “So we would
fulfill each other's sexual needs and that's all? No
relationship beyond that?”

Hell no. Little did Domini know now that he'd
uncovered this surprising side of her, after he got her in his bed,
he'd never let her out. She'd belong to him. But his
reassurance he wouldn't attempt to turn this into a traditional
dating relationship seemed important to her. It went against
everything Cam was to lie. But because he wanted her with an acute
ache, an unfathomable need, a sense of rightness he'd never
felt in his life, he lied with a straight face.

“
It's a small town, Domini. If my truck is
parked outside your apartment all night people will know something is
goin' on with us. Denial would just increase the speculation.
So I ain't gonna hide the fact we're seeing each other.
What we do when we're alone together ain't anybody's
business. I don't tell locker room stories.”

“
That's why I trust you.”

“
Okay, but I'm curious. Why don't you
want a relationship?”

“
Because any kind of long-term relationship always
falls apart. Always. I watched my parent's marriage implode
before they died. I saw my friends in the Ukraine marry themselves
off to the highest bidder and they were no better off than a
prostitute or a maid. I witnessed verbal abuse repeatedly in
so-called Christian marriages and relationships, actions that were
sanctioned by the church. And don't get me started on the
physical abuse issues Nadia suffered before she escaped that awful
relationship. So I'll pass on the trappings of marriage,
because from what I've seen, it is a trap.”

Cam let her vehemence sink in. It chilled him to the
bone.

“
I'll never get married, Cam. That's
not the life for me. Do you understand?”

No.
“Completely. And we
are on the exact same page, there, princess. I've worked hard
to turn my house into my sanctuary, and it might make me a bastard,
but I'm not eager to share.”

Relief softened the hard set to her mouth. “I'm
glad. And I'm good with pretending we're dating, when
we're really having lots of hot sex.”

“
Which brings us back to my next question. What
about birth control?”

A stark look briefly flashed in her eyes. “We are
covered as far as no accidental pregnancy and I haven't had a
lover in three years, so no STDs.”

It'd been nearly that long on the “no sex”
wagon for Cam too, but confessing the truth smacked of desperation.
“So, we agree no condoms?”

“
Yes.”

“
Good.” Cam finished his beer. He set it on
the table and stood. “I'm done talkin'. How about
if I finish the rest of the tour?”

Domini clasped Cam's outstretched hand and
followed him back into the house.

Chapter Five

A house tour.

Maybe Cam would show her his bedroom. And then
demonstrate how wickedly ruthless he can be in bed.

Focus, Domini.

That was nearly impossible when the ragged edge of Cam's
thumb continually stroked the inside of her wrist—an erotic
touch she felt tugging between her legs. As they meandered the
brightly lit hallway, Domini looked up to see skylights spaced a foot
apart. “Those are unusual. I like them.”

“
I had Chet and Remy add them. I can't stand
living in darkness.” He gestured to the bathroom. “Pretty
much everything from here back is a total remodel.”

“
Why not just build a whole new house?”

“
I like the location. The house has a solid
foundation. It just needed a little cosmetic work and someone to care
about it.” He pushed open a door that'd been left ajar.
“Spare bedroom.” The plaid denim bedspread hung off one
end and pillows spilled onto the carpeted floor. “I see Keely
managed to bail without cleaning up after herself again.”

“
Do you really hate having people in your house?”

“
Not hate. It's just…I went from
living at home to living in barracks and tents. I've never
lived by myself. I tend to get protective of my space. My family
doesn't get that. So I had to state the rules about them
staying away without a specific invitation from the moment I moved
back here.” Cam opened another door and hit the lights. “Here's
my bedroom. We combined the two smaller bedrooms into a larger one.”

The bed dwarfed the room. Rising from each corner of the
bed frame were thick wooden posts. A plain cotton quilt in a vivid
bronze covered the massive space from headboard to footrest.

A pair of crutches were propped between the headboard
and the nightstand. Contrary to what he'd said, Domini
suspected the real reason Cam preferred to be alone in his house was
so he could wander around minus his prosthesis without embarrassment.

Domini refocused on the furniture. A tall rough-hewn
pine dresser, with wrought-iron accents, matched the nightstands
book-ending the bed. An oversized, overstuffed corduroy recliner
faced the window rather than into the room.

“
What do you think?”

“
I think I could crawl right into that puffy bed
and take a nap.”

“
Princess, when I get you in my bed the last thing
we're gonna be doin' is sleeping.”

His husky tone dripped of raw sex and sent a shiver of
fresh desire rippling through her.

The door she assumed led to a closet was actually a
pocket door that revealed a sun-drenched bathroom. An enormous
slate-tiled shower, encased in glass blocks, took up one side of the
room. A deep Jacuzzi tub the other. A toilet was secreted behind half
walls in the corner. Along the back wall was a double sink in a soft
gray, sunk into a glossy, black, high countertop and surrounded by
mirrors. She checked out the bathtub, looking longingly at the jets
and nozzles. Outside around the rim, a conglomeration of
silver-colored tubes were imbedded in the tiled floor, curving around
the front end and backside of the tub.

Domini started to ask Cam why he needed so many
handrails, when she realized climbing in and out of a slippery tub
with one leg would be difficult. She'd forgotten about his
handicap. A positive sign in her mind, but she knew Cam wouldn't
appreciate her mentioning it so she didn't.

She faced the mirror and Cam wedged his body right
behind hers, nestling his groin into her butt. He gripped her hips.
“Bend forward until your palms are flat to the wall.”

Keeping their gazes connected in the mirror, Domini did
as he told her.

Cam's eyes glittered. “Compliant. I like
that.” He rocked his pelvis, grinding his cock against the
cleft of her ass. “I'm gonna fuck you like this, Domini.”

“
Now?”
Please. Now.

He shook his head. “Soon.” Cam tugged her
upright, keeping her back pressed against his chest as he trailed
openmouthed kisses up her throat. “I knew this countertop
height would be perfect.”

She was dying to ask if he'd had other women in
the bathroom to test the height and strength of the marble. Her gaze
flickered over him and she had her answer. A man as sexy, virile and
commanding as Cam McKay wouldn't lack for sex partners. Ever.

“
Come on. Let's get back to the kitchen. I
could use another beer. Maybe we could play cards.”

“
Cards?” she repeated.

“
Yep. The best way to get to know a person is to
play cards with them. You learn their tells—” he licked
the cord straining in her neck and she moaned, “—like
that one. Or figure out when they're bluffing.” He slid
his hand into her hair and pulled.

Domini stiffened with surprise.

“
You don't like that, do you?”

She tried to jerk out of his hold, which only made her
scalp sting worse. Then she attempted to relax.

“
Answer me.”