Shiftr: Swipe Left for Love (Adaira) BBW Bear Shifter Romance (Hope Valley BBW online dating app romances Book 6) (10 page)

“Please.” Adaira watched his retreating back as he walked into the cabin. She’d come to the US determined to find herself a shifter husband, and she was aware that she’d have to adapt to some of their animal ways, but Leigh was on a completely different level. She was so drawn to him, with a magnetism that felt primal, instinctive. She’d never felt that way towards anyone before. But if things were going to work out between them, she’d have to ask him to change a lot of things about himself, and she didn’t know if she had the right to do that. He seemed happy the way he was.
But then, if that’s true, why is he looking for a mate in the first place?
she mused.

He came back with two more steaming mugs.

“Have your previous girlfriends lived up here with you?” she asked, keeping her tone casual. He frowned, uncomprehending.

“I’ve never had a mate before,” he said. She pressed her lips together, stunned.
Is he saying what I think he’s saying? That he’s never been with a woman before?
Last night he’d kissed her like a man who knew what he was doing. She crossed her legs as the memory of it delivered a jolt of arousal deep in the core of her being. She looked at him sideways. He was absolutely breathtaking. Definitely the best-looking guy she’d ever seen. He could have any woman he wanted. Yet he lived up here like a hermit.

“What made you sign up to Shiftr?” she asked.

“The guys bet me that I’d find someone on there who was at least an 80% match with me, or they’d each come up here, bringing me as much beer as they could carry.” Her mouth made a small
O
.

“A woman or a lot of beer. Sounds like a win-win situation.”

“That’s what the guys said,” he replied, with a sheepish laugh.

“I’m a big fan of beer, so I can see where you’re coming from,” she said.

“You are? That’s awesome! Lauren was trying to get me to drink wine, so I’d know what to do in a fancy restaurant. But I didn’t like it.” His face puckered at the memory, and she suppressed a giggle. He was adorable. But he obviously wanted to be alone.

“So you’re not really looking for a mate?” she demanded. He looked into her eyes, stared down at the ground, looked up at her again.

“I thought my destiny was to be alone up here. I was happy the way I was. But meeting you through the app has put me in a spin, to be honest with you.” His eyes were full of hunger again. She should ignore it. Everything she was hearing from him was that he wasn’t looking to be with anyone. But he was so gorgeous, and she wanted him so much.

“Oh yeah – why’s that?” she said softly.

“Because you’re so beautiful, and my bear tells me that you’re my mate,” he said. She edged closer on the rock.

“And what does that mean?”

“It means that it wants me to mate you.” He dipped his head, his face inches from hers.

“Really?” she breathed, and she tilted her head and kissed him. He gave a low rumble, deep in his throat, and his lips responded to her kiss, crushing on hers. His tongue parted her lips, sliding into her mouth more confidently this time. As her tongue danced against his, it seemed to ignite his desire, and he clasped her waist in his hands, pulling her against him, while his tongue plunged more deeply into her mouth. The pressure of his lips was hard, almost bruising, and his huge hand came up to cup her jaw. This big, muscular man’s desire for her was hot, unbelievably hot, and she felt dizzy at the arousal building in her body. Her nipples ached as they hardened beneath her t-shirt, hungering for his touch.
Touch me, touch me all over
, she willed him silently. And, as if he’d heard, he laid a hand very lightly on one of her breasts. As a finger grazed her nipple, she gave a little moan, and his hand shot away.

“It’s ok. I like you doing that,” she whispered. His fingers returned, hesitantly, gently feeling the outline of her breast, running back and forth over her nipple. Ever since his lips had touched hers, there had been a tingle in her clit, and now it graduated into a powerful ache, deep inside her. Once again, she was aware of her nakedness beneath the t-shirt. She had a wild urge to rip it off, and incite him to abandon his gentlemanly restraint. She laid a hand on his thigh. His muscles were tensed, as if he was poised for action. As he kneaded her breast, she slid her hand higher and higher. When it brushed against his cock, he jumped as if he’d been electrocuted. He was rock hard and ready for her. She wanted him inside her so bad. She touched him again, through his jeans. She couldn’t feel any underwear?
Is he going commando?
The thought made her brain explode. It wouldn’t take much to strip his clothes off. He could take her right here, on the grass. His kisses were getting hotter and more possessive, and he tugged at her t-shirt, leaving her in no doubt that he wanted to tear it off.

“What do you want?” she whispered in his ear.

“I want to mate you and make you mine,” he said. His voice was different, rougher than before, and she was very aware of his animal. It thrilled and frightened her in equal measure.

“Oh yeah?” she encouraged, lifting up the hem of his shirt and revealing his rippling abs to her hungry gaze.

“I want to claim you as my own and keep you here with me forever,” he growled.
What!
An alarm went off in her head and she tore herself away from him.

“Leigh, I can’t live here with you,” she said. He stared at her, his brown eyes full of confusion, and then hurt.

“But why?” he asked, as innocently as a child.

“Because I’ve grown up in the human world, and I like it. I like being able to shop and meet up with friends and go to their houses, and host dinner parties. I like milk in my coffee and heating when it’s cold. And electricity. There are so many things I need electricity for. And I need to work. If I had to trek down from the mountain every time I needed to go to the university, there wouldn’t be time to do anything else in life.”

“But you can give that up when you’re my mate. I’ll take care of your every need,” he said. She stroked his face.

“Leigh, I need to work. I’m an independent woman. A woman who sometimes enjoys buying herself some little presents. And I have to buy presents for other people too. And besides, I love my work. I’d hate to give it up.” His eyes filled with sadness. “But you could come and live in the valley? Or how about near the valley – perhaps at the foot of the mountains?” she continued.

“Adaira, I don’t think I can. This mountain is a part of me. I believe that if I leave it, my spirit will perish. It’s my destiny to live here.”

“But – ” she began to argue, but then she trailed off. “Then we can’t be mates, can we?” she said instead.

“I guess not.” He shook his head, full of misery. His gaze flickered towards her face and down to her body, lingering on her curves. Disappointment coursed through her. As much as she wanted him, she couldn’t do it now, when it obviously meant a lot more than sex to him. It took all of her self-control to move away from him, until they were several feet apart.

“It would probably be better if I went home today,” she said. His eyes were full of sorrow. He was silent for a while.

“Adaira, please stay for the day,” he said at last. “I want to show you how beautiful it is here on the mountain.” She started to say something, but he continued. “You’re my mate, and if I can’t be with you, I accept that. But please let me have this one day.” She was silent for an even longer time, then she nodded.

“Ok, one day. We can have one special day. You want to show me around here?” He grinned, instantly brightening.

“I do,” he said. “I’ll just go shower first.”

“Would you mind bringing me my clothes, if they’re dry?”

He brought them over. An hour in the sun and breeze had been enough and they were perfectly dry. When she heard the shower going, she stripped the t-shirt off and got dressed. Her heart was heavy with regret and pain. She was starting to like him a lot. He was so direct and unaffected and the ache between her thighs testified to the fact that she was attracted to him like crazy. But it seemed like they belonged in different worlds. He had brought her here under false pretenses, but it was his friends she should be angry with, not him.

The cabin door creaked and he poked his head out.

“Are you ready?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said with a grin. “What’s the plan?”

“Well, I thought I’d take you around a couple of my favorite spots. You said you’re into plants and flowers, right?” She nodded. “So I’ll show you some of the ones that I like the best. We might see another bear or two. They’ll probably be afraid of you, but you shouldn’t fear them. They won’t hurt you. Ok, I’m going to shift now, and you can climb on my back.”

He closed the cabin door again. A minute later, it opened, and Adaira swallowed, trying not to be alarmed as a huge brown bear strolled out and came right up to her. Instinctively, she put her hand out and Leigh nuzzled it, licking it with his long pink tongue. He came up close and she climbed astride his back, the action becoming more familiar to her.

Leigh began at an easy walk and gradually speeded up as Adaira became comfortable with his gait again. She sensed his concern for her, and quickly relaxed into the motion of his body, tangling her fingers into his soft fur.

He took her to different parts of the mountain, pointing out various shrubs and flowers that he thought might catch her interest. There were some species that she’d never seen before, and she wished yet again that the evil wolf hadn’t stolen her phone, preventing her from being able to photograph them. At first, it was weird not being able to communicate verbally with Leigh, but she soon got used to his purrs and rumbles, and figuring out what they meant, and after a while she even forgot that they weren’t chatting to each other. She felt a real intimacy with this man-bear. For once in her life, she didn’t need to chatter incessantly to reassure herself that she was keeping the other person entertained. Instead, they were in tune with one another.
Maybe this is how it’s supposed to feel when you find your perfect match
? she wondered. And the thought gave her a pang.
Maybe this is how it’s supposed to feel when your perfect match isn’t intent on living in isolation at the top of a mountain
.

They paused at the summit of the mountain and admired the view. It was a perfectly clear day and Adaira could see for miles in every direction. Hope Valley seemed so remote from there; almost unreal, like a toy town.

“I feel like we’re the only people in the world,” she murmured. Leigh gave a soft rumble, meaning that he concurred, and she realized that this was most likely how he felt every day.

He moved off again, climbing down a steep slope on the far side of the mountain. After he’d walked for ten minutes or so, there came a bear’s rumble from far in the distance. Adaira froze and her fingers tightened in his fur. Immediately, he purred, telling her that everything was ok.
He told me not to be scared of other bears
, she reminded herself. Then Leigh gave a loud rumble of his own, which made her ears ring. He moved into an area of dense undergrowth, carrying her carefully, so the bushes didn’t scratch her. Soon he came out of the bushes and into a clearing. And there was a large, black bear right in front of them, standing up on its hind legs. Adaira’s heart pounded and a pulse beat in her throat.
Is it going to attack?
She whimpered in terror, but Leigh gave a long, low purr, which sounded like a caress. The bear dropped onto all fours and ran up to them. As Adaira stared at it paralyzed, it came close to Leigh, nipped his ear, and gave him a long lick, right across his face. He made what Adaira could only interpret as a happy sound. Then the bear came over to her. As she watched, it licked the back of her hand, and Leigh made an encouraging noise. It licked her again and again, nuzzling at her. At last, she opened her hand and tuned it over. The bear licked her palm, and, with trembling fingers, she stroked it all over its velvety muzzle. Its breath came in steady purrs, like a cat, and it gazed at her with bright, intelligent eyes. It moved back to Leigh again and the two bears licked each other’s faces, and playfully cuffed at each other with their huge paws.

At last, they parted and Leigh turned and walked back the way he’d come. Adaira waved to the bear and was rewarded with a long, soft rumble.

They headed back to the cabin, and Leigh let her down beside the rock before going inside and shifting into his human form.

“How do you know that bear?” she asked, as he came back outside, tucking his t-shirt into his pants.

“She’s my mother. Well, my adoptive mother really.”

“She seems lovely.”

“She’s the best. She saved me when my real parents abandoned me,” he said with a grin. She looked at him through her lashes, sensing that there was a lot of sadness beneath his thankfulness and love for his adoptive mother.

“What happened? If you don’t mind me asking?”

“Not at all.” He sat down next to her, and she inhaled his rich, masculine scent, glad to have him back in his human form. At the same time, the calm she’d enjoyed all afternoon dissolved and once again she felt tingly and on edge.

“My parents were both shifters, but as a child, I was unusually small, and my dad didn’t believe that I was his son. I remember my parents arguing a lot, my dad referring to me as a bastard, and my mom begging him to stop. In the end, he said he was going to leave her, and she chose him over me. They abandoned me in the woods. One night, they said we were going camping. I fell asleep in my tent, and the next day, I woke up and they were gone. I had no way of finding my way back home. I wandered alone for three days, eating berries here and there, but I didn’t know how to survive by myself, and I was getting weaker and weaker through lack of food. And at last, I came across Ursa. I was scared of her at first, but she was very gentle. She took me to her lair and fed me, along with her cub. She cared for me for years, as if I was her own, until I got to about 13, and I discovered I could shift. My father had been wrong about me the whole time. But it was great for my relationship with Ursa, and it brought us closer together. We always communicated well, but being able to speak bear-to-bear was on another level completely. I lived with her until adulthood, and then I moved out and built my own place and met the guys who became my clan. But I’ve never wanted to live far from her.”

“I don’t blame you,” Adaira said, her eyes sparkling with emotion. “I can see that the bond between you is very deep.” He nodded.

“It is. She’s very old now though.” His own eyes filled with sorrow. Adaira took his hand, not knowing what to say, and he squeezed hers in return. “She’s had a happy life,” he said. “And that’s all anyone can ask for.” He kept hold of her hand and turned his gorgeous eyes on her, and suddenly they were kissing again. His movements were even hungrier than before, and he snatched at her clothes, a soft rumble growing in his chest. She pulled away laughing.

“Leigh, stop!” she exclaimed. “It’s obvious we want each other, and this is just making things worse. We’re not going to be able to control ourselves if we carry on like this.” His irises were pure black with desire for her.

“I don’t care, Adaira. I want you so badly. I didn’t know it was possible to want anyone like this,” he said, his voice husky, filling her veins with even more need for him. 

“Me neither. But if we can’t be together, we’re going to regret doing this, I guarantee it!”

At her words, his hands dropped from her waist.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I promise not to kiss you again while you’re here,” he said.

“Good,” she said, relief and disappointment waging a war inside her. He stood up abruptly.

“I don’t have any more meat for tonight, so I should go hunting. I’m afraid that I can’t really take you with me because it’s dangerous, so will you be ok here?”

“Of course.”

“I’ll leave you some books to read?”

“Please,” she said with a smile.

After checking that she was comfortable outside and wouldn’t rather be on the bed, Leigh brought her a stack of well-thumbed novels, and then he shifted inside the cabin and headed off to the woods again. Adaira picked the books up and shuffled through them restlessly, her mind full of Leigh. She was so drawn to him in every way – there was the crazy attraction that made her want to rip his clothes off every time she looked at him, but more than that, she was beginning to feel an emotional connection to that pure-hearted, gentle giant.
How is this possible in such a short time?
she wondered. Meeting his mother had only made things worse. Now she knew for sure that she could never drag him away from the mountain. Yet she missed him already, as if part of her had been torn away. She sighed loudly. The sooner she got away from him, the better. The next few hours were going to be torture.