Shelter Me (16 page)

“More pressure. Like I said. You have enough on you. Admit it.”

“Life’s definitely dog piling on us lately.” She leaned into his touch, a smile twitching her lips. “Get it, dog pile. We’re in an animal rescue.”

“I got it.” Smiling back, he cradled her face in his palm. The Tennessee sunset cast such a damn beautiful glow around her he could barely breathe. “How could I have forgotten how incredibly beautiful you are?”

Unable to resist, he kissed her, just his lips meeting hers and holding. But it felt like the right kind of reverent kiss for such a mystical sunset and incredible woman. She was so damn strong and brave, holding it together for her family when no one would have faulted her for moving on with her life.

Loyalty like that from relatives wasn’t a given. He knew that all too well. He needed to give himself space to think this through. He owed her better than half measures.

In fact, he owed her father everything, including his life.

And with that sobering thought, he ended the kiss, allowing himself one stroke along her hair before he walked away.

*   *   *

BY FRIDAY, SIERRA
was convinced Mike must have left all his T-shirts in Iraq, because he sure didn’t bother wearing them while he worked.

She hosed off the outdoor part of a kennel run while the dogs played in the yard with volunteers wearing out the pooches before other volunteers bathed them. Perfect time for Sierra to get some extra cleaning and sanitizing accomplished. Or maybe she was just looking for an excuse to be out here where Mike was working on a ceiling fan while shirtless.

She resisted the urge to hose herself off.

Her gaze returned to the V of his back as he reached overhead, his broad shoulders tapering down to narrow hips where the band of his boxers rode just above the low-slung waist of his jeans. Golden skin beaded with sweat. He twisted to adjust a wobbling blade on the fan, turning in a way that put a whole new set of ab muscles on display. Even better? They were right at mouth level since he stood on a stepladder. The urge to walk over there and skim her mouth along his hip was never far from her mind.

Except that he’d pulled away from her after that kiss they’d shared.

She almost wondered if he worked his ass off fixing things just to be sure he stayed at arm’s length now. He’d added a basic security system to the barn, which had alerted them twice to the fact Gramps was wandering into the barn at night to take dogs out for a walk—which solved one mystery. They now knew who was prying open the kennels, even going so far as to break them to release his dog of choice for the night.

Mike had fixed the fences, repaired a leaky faucet, even changed lightbulbs. As an added bonus, they got to hear him play his guitar late into the night, a distant, tuneful strumming that carried on the breeze and helped her fall asleep imagining those nimble fingers playing over her body.

But no more kisses. He didn’t need to. Just one look from him stirred up memories that fired through her. Tempting her.

Focus, damn it. Her mom needed all the help she could get today. The place was full to capacity after helping a shelter confiscate dogs from a hoarder that had started as a rescue, then got out of hand. Hopefully they would be able to find homes for some of them at the Doggie Palooza tomorrow.

Sierra had to commend her mother for setting rigid boundaries for herself in order to never cross that line of taking in too many rescues. Easier said than done some days when area shelters called with pleas for help with this or that animal. Like Lucky, who’d detoxed into a goofy and totally docile little fella, currently licking the inside of a German shepherd’s ears.

Smiling, Sierra finished the last outdoor kennel run and shifted to hosing off the floor of the dog wash area. Dedicated volunteers Charlotte and Debbie were scrubbing a Great Pyrenees named Atlas, a gorgeous, huge dog—bought from a breeder as a puppy and dumped at a shelter once the owners grasped just how big the animal would get. Atlas gave teenage Charlotte a sloppy wet kiss in thanks.

Debbie scratched a lather along the dog’s back, but was clearly distracted staring inside the barn. And Sierra had to say, she couldn’t blame the woman. Mike on that ladder finishing up another fix-it project was a sight to behold. He stretched up, repairing a squeak and wobble in one of the fat-blade ceiling fans. Sexy didn’t come close to describing how mouthwateringly hot he looked as sweat slicked his back, trickling down his spine, lower, lower.

She bit her bottom lip.

Not fair at all, especially when she resembled a drowned rat in purple rain boots. Smelling worse than the stalls before cleaning. Funny thing was, as much as she griped about this, she believed in her mother’s mission. She believed in this animal rescue and the work they did, the lives they saved. But it was getting tougher and tougher to juggle the time here with the demands of her graduate assistantship teaching. What would happen when she went to work full-time after graduation? Would there be enough hours in the day to be a part of the beautiful mission here?

Even if her main contribution lately consisted of hosing out the stalls?

With that thought, she gave a final blast of water along the concrete walkway before closing off the spray of water mixed with a bleach-based cleaning solution. She felt eyes on her and followed the sensation until her gaze traveled back up again, to Mike. She hooked the hose onto the end of a kennel gate and stepped deeper into the barn. Her soggy boots squeaked at the same pitch of the volunteers’ laughter as Atlas shook a monsoon of water and suds on them.

Mike’s eyes stayed locked on her, and she could see him doing the same thing he’d done all week long. He was wrestling with the urge to come closer to her, holding himself back. The memory of their kiss was in his eyes even as he still kept his hands to himself.

“What?” She shifted from foot to foot, boots squeaking and squelching. “Did you need something? A wrench? A glass of iced tea?”

Or a shirt. Or her mouth kissing every inch of that sweat-slicked chest.

“I don’t need anything . . .” A wicked gleam entered his eyes. “Just enjoying the view down your shirt.”

She looked down fast, and sure enough, her soggy T-shirt was drooping in the front, not to mention plastered to her minimal curves. Of course he’d seen every inch of her before without clothes, so she shouldn’t feel so self-conscious. But she did.

Not that she would let him know that.

“I hear there’s a real market for pinups soaked in kennel water and wearing galoshes.”

“You’re even hotter when you talk.” Winking, he gathered up his tools and started down the ladder. “Nice job cleaning, by the way. I’m amazed at how non-dog this place smells.”

He referenced the scent of things a lot, good and bad. She hadn’t noticed until now. She would have to ask him about that sometime.

“I’m just doing my part to get ready for the Doggie Palooza tomorrow. Since we’ll be away most of Saturday, I need to double up on work today.” She leaned a foot back against a kennel gate as he drew closer and closer. “We also get increased adoption traffic after an event like that. It’s important to make a good impression, especially with the council meeting coming up. Your help couldn’t have come at a better time.”

He stepped off the ladder, muscles flexing in his jeans. Then that incredible chest of his came into close-up view. “What happens to all these animals if your mom’s rescue shuts down?”

His question made her chest go tight. The sanctuary they ran offered shelter to precious lives that had nowhere else to go. This wasn’t just a second chance. For them, the animals in their care, it was the last chance. She peeled off her gloves.

“I don’t know exactly. Depends on how long we have to vacate them from the property. I guess first step, Mom stops taking in new animals and focuses on moving these as quickly as possible into forever homes.” Except the litter of pit puppies weren’t old enough for adoption, which meant they would have to find another rescue willing to take them when rescues were already full enough. And people weren’t exactly lining up to adopt pit bulls.

Mike reached just past her to grip the kennel gate. “If she sells this spread and moves into a regular place, you would be able to go off to school.”

“And my grandfather would end up in a nursing home.” Her stomach lurched like that moment a roller coaster flipped upside down.

“Eventually, he will anyway,” Mike said gently.

She scrunched her nose. “What are you? The reality police?”

His forehead scrunched. “Forget I said that. I’m still in combat mode.”

She nodded simply, understanding too well. She’d seen her dad after deployments often enough to know it took a while for them to decompress. She should have remembered that for Mike. He’d been through . . . she didn’t even know what since she hadn’t bothered to ask about him. She’d been focused on her own loss. Her own grief. Maybe that was the explanation for his unpredictable behavior.

“How about you take a break, Mike? Go shower—” Put on a freaking shirt. “And I’ll have some food ready for you over at the house. You must be starving.”

“Correct you are,” he conceded with a wink. “You’re too good, you know that, right?”

“Puh-lease. The last thing I want or deserve is a Saint Sierra label.”

“Fair enough.”

They’d spent a week together, and for some reason he’d backed off after that last kiss. Sure, she’d been telling herself—and him—they couldn’t pick up where they left off. Still, she couldn’t stop fantasizing about taking that kiss further. Maybe they needed to talk about that if they were going to spend three more weeks living together—or rather, living next door to each other.

“Once we eat lunch, want to go with me to take Trooper for a walk? He’s chomping at the bit to ditch that cone and run. I’d like to drain some energy from him before the event tomorrow. Even though he’s not up for adoption, we’re hoping all the press about him will bring people to our booth at the event.”

“What if we end up in the woods on that walk? Alone is . . . dangerous. I might back you against a tree to kiss you. A real kiss this time.”

There he went with those mixed messages again. Flirting but not touching.

“Do saints kiss?” she asked flippantly. “I’m honestly not sure . . .” Not sure now about the walk or what game they were playing. “This is strange.”

“How so?”

To hell with waiting for the walk. She glanced over at the open doors to make sure Debbie and Charlotte were still occupied outside with rinsing off Atlas.

Sierra angled closer, lowering her voice. “You kiss me, then pretend for a week like nothing happened. Like the past year never happened. Even stranger, it’s as if we’re playacting that you were never gone. But you have been away and so much is different. We’ve both been scarred by this deployment.”

His eyes shuttered. “You’re the one who lost a dad. You’re the one with cause to grieve.”

“You went to war. I realize that leaves marks.” She also knew better than to touch him right now or he would bolt before they had a chance to finish this conversation. “Even without what happened this year I can look at my grandfather and see that. The more he loses touch with the present, the more I see how his past in the military is so much more a part of him than his history as a father or husband.”

“That has to be rough for you.”

“It is, but that’s not my point. This is about you, too, about things being rough for
you
.”

“You’re a strong woman,” he said as if she hadn’t even spoken, staying focused on her.

She ground her teeth. “I hate that word.”

“Huh? That was a compliment.”

“Strong. Like I spent the past year lifting weights? Strong because I do what’s right like some martyr—or saint?” She shook her head. “I’m none of those things. I’m resentful and frustrated and tired. I want to scream over everything that’s been taken from my family. I want to hug my father and punch him for choosing his duty to his uniform over his duty to his children. Hell, I don’t know how my mother keeps from exploding. She’s been shortchanged for so damn long. And yes, I’m also sad over everything I know you had to experience over there.”

“You blame your dad for staying in the military?”

Still no acknowledgment of his pain or grief . . . What poem was it where Emily wrote, “Saying nothing sometimes says the most”? Maybe Mike was hinting at things in his own way. Asking how she felt about him leaving. Using this conversation as a shield to express his feelings without actually acknowledging he had them.

How like a man. He wasn’t going to open up, not fully, and she wasn’t sure how to sift through his hidden cues on top of the whole flirting/not touching dance they’d been doing. And what if she made the wrong step when he was still in his post-deployment recovery?

Forget taking a walk. She needed space of her own. More than anything she wanted to get advice from her mom, but that seemed cruel somehow.

“Mike, it’s all a moot point now for my brother and me. We’ll never have anything more from our father again.” She edged to the side, away from him. “I think I’d better go clean up before lunch.”

She spun away fast.

“Like I said,” Mike’s voice washed over her, “you’re a strong woman.”

Maybe so. But she was also confused as hell.

*   *   *

LACEY DROVE INTO
the waterside lot along the Cumberland River, the barking in the back of her SUV reaching deafening levels. She had a dozen dogs in crates in the back for the Doggie Palooza. No cats today, since it was an outdoor event. Her family was supposed to be trailing her. Nathan was driving Gramps and Sierra’s friend Mary Hannah. Nathan welcomed any chance to use his new permit, one of the few things that made him smile. Sierra was riding with Mike, who’d stored some puppy pens and a huge banner in the back of his truck. Traffic had sucked the whole way over, and she’d lost them in her rearview mirror long ago.

Hopefully one of them would show up soon to help her unload since she couldn’t leave the dogs alone in the car. Foster parents would be bringing other dogs, for a total of around twenty-four adoptables at the event, but there were a lot of other shelters and rescues attending with equally cute critters in need of a family.