Shattered Justice (21 page)

But how?

Her fingers went to the pendant hanging around her neck, and she fingered the fine detail of the lion’s head. As she did so, an idea came to her.

She hesitated, then flipped the sleeping bag back and went to kneel beside the window flap. She spread her palm across the screen, looking up at the night sky.

“Mom?” Shannon gripped the pendant with her other hand, unable to stop the tears from rolling down her face. “Mommy?”

The night breeze stirred the trees, filling the darkness with a soft rush of sound.

Shannon drew her knees to her chest, never taking her eyes from the stars. “I wish you were here, Mommy.” She rubbed away the tears stinging her face. “You’d like Jayce so much. You’d make him feel special.” She paused, then lifted the pendant from around her neck and held it in her hand. “Like you always made me feel special.”

The golden lion’s face caught glimmers of moonlight, and Shannon could almost believe it was crying, too. She closed her hand around the pendant and nodded.

“I know what you’d do, Mommy. How you’d show Jayce you loved him, that God loved him.” She turned her face to the sky. “So since you can’t do it, I will. Is that okay?”

She waited, holding her breath, and though no sound came, she felt the answer deep inside.

Warmth. Peace.

And a firm, loving
yes
.

Shannon crawled back into her sleeping bag. She slipped the pendant under her pillow and lay down.

A yawn took hold of her, and she patted the pillow, smiling. “Night, Mommy. I love you.”

IT WAS SO QUIET HERE
.

Jayce liked that. The quiet. The way you could just sit here, lean back against a tree, close your eyes—and feel like you were all alone. No one to hassle you. No one to tell you what you could and couldn’t do.

No one to threaten. To show how easy it was to get to an old woman alone. To hurt her.

No one to make you do things you didn’t want to do.

He opened his eyes, looking up at the blue, blue sky through the thick branches of the tree. Man, it would be nice to just stay here. Live here.

Free.

Don’t kid yourself. One hour out here alone, and you’d be scrambling to get back to town
.

No. He wouldn’t.

Yeah? And when it rains? Snows? What then? You just sit out here and freeze?

He’d find shelter. He wasn’t stupid.

Says who? How smart is giving in? Doing things you
say
you hate?

Jayce gritted his teeth.
I don’t just say I hate them. I do hate them
.

But you’re so good at them. Why do you think Marlin keeps coming to you?

Because he wants the rep, but he doesn’t want to risk getting caught. He’s like those jungle dogs … those jackals. He waits for someone else to make the kill, then he moves in and claims the prize
. Jayce pushed back against the tree, felt the rough bark digging into his skin.
He’s nuthin’ but a coward who won’t do his own dirty work
.

A coward? If you’re so brave, let’s see you say that to his face
.

Jayce longed to tell Marlin what he thought of him and his crew. What they could do with their threats against his grandmother. And Shelby. But one thing you didn’t do with a scared jackal was back it into a corner.

Not unless you wanted to get torn to shreds.

I know why Marlin comes to you. Because you’re born to the work he gives you. A regular chip off the ol’ block. You know what they say, like father, like so—

Jayce stood, pushing away from the tree. “I’m not like him!”

Coulda fooled me
.

He started walking. The dark voice chuckled, a deep rumble in the pit of Jayce’s gut. He clamped his hands over his ears, but it didn’t help. The voice was always there. Taunting.

Hateful.

You only hate me because I speak the truth
.

“Shut
up
!”

“Jayce?”

He spun around—then stopped cold.

Shannon stood there, eyes wide and hesitant as she watched him.

See? Even she knows who you really are. Look at her. The look on her face. Like prey that’s just realized it’s too late to run
.

Jayce willed the spiteful voice into silence, forced the churning emotions away.

A gentle touch startled him. He looked down at Shannon’s hand, resting on his sleeve.

“Are you okay?”

Shock ran through him. The voice was wrong. She wasn’t afraid. Not at all. The only thing Jayce saw in her expression was concern.

Caring.

The last of his anger melted in an overwhelming warmth. Looking into this girl’s eyes, the resentment that dogged him couldn’t hold up.

Instead, what he felt was something it took him a while to recognize.

Peace.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He gave her hand an awkward pat, and her quick smile made him glad he’d done so. Then he looked around. They were in the middle of nowhere. “Hey, what are you doing way out here anyway? Where’s Aaron? And your dad?”

“They’re back at the camp. I wanted to talk with you.”

“How’d you know where I was?”

She bit her lip. “Well, I saw you leave after you got your chores done, and … um … I followed you. I lost you for a little while, then I heard your voice. And that’s when I found you again.”

He eyed the woods. “Do you know how to get back to camp?”

“Sure!” She turned and started walking. “It’s this way.”

Relief lightened his step as he fell in beside her. “You like it out here, don’t you?”

“I like it a lot. I mean, living in town was okay. There was always lots to do and stuff. But out here …” She stopped, reaching out to break off the tip of a tree branch. She crushed the needles in her fingers then cupped her hands and inhaled. “Smell that.” She held her cupped hands out to him.

He let the strong fragrance seep into his lungs.

She started walking again. “It just feels and smells so good out here. You know, fresh and new. Like every day is another chance.”

“Another chance for what?”

“Oh, everything!” She lifted her hands, as though to embrace the world. “Life. You know, all of it.” She shrugged, and he watched a hint of pink slip into her cheeks. “I don’t know. Just for being, I guess.”

Did all girls her age think like this? He wasn’t sure, but he had the feeling Shannon was different.

Something tugged at him, a kind of longing that dug deep, making him ache until realization hit with the force of a fist.

He wanted to be like that.

Special. Happy. In love with the world and everything around him.

But being that way … that was for kids like Shannon. Kids whose parents loved her like they should. Kids whose parents spent time with her, talked with her, laughed with her.

Kids whose parents didn’t land in jail.

He brushed the depressing thought away. “So what’d you want to talk with me about?”

“I have something for you.”

“Yeah?” As before, his mood couldn’t help but lift when he looked at her. “Did you catch a fish and want me to clean it for you or somethin’?”

She giggled. “No, you goof. Look—” she pointed just beyond them—“there’s the camp.”

He followed the direction of her finger. Aaron was visible just beyond the trees, sitting near the campfire toasting something.

“Here.”

Jayce turned his head, looking down at Shannon’s now-outstretched hand. A pendant lay there. He peered close.

“Oh, man …”

A golden lion’s head, with amber eyes catching the sunlight and sparkling as though they were real. It was so lifelike Jayce almost expected it to open its mouth and roar.

“It’s a pendant. You know, a kind of necklace.” She held it up, and he saw that the lion’s head was strung on a leather cord. “I got it for my birthday a couple years ago. It’s Aslan.”

He stretched a finger out to touch it. “Man, that is so cool.” He met Shannon’s eyes. “It looks just like I pictured him.”

Shannon turned it over. “There’s something written on the back.”

Jayce read the engraving:
Shannon, See life with God’s eyes. Love, Mom
.

“It’s for you.”

He stepped back. Had he heard her right? “I can’t take this. Your mom gave it to you.”

“And I’m giving it to you. I even took it off the chain and put it on a leather cord, ’cuz I thought that was better for a guy.”

“But … why?”

The light in her smile was almost more than he could bear.

“Because you remind me of him.”

Now he was
sure
he hadn’t heard right. “Of Aslan? I remind you of Aslan?”

Shannon reached out and slid the cord over Jayce’s head. “You’re just like him.” She stepped back, surveying her handiwork. “You’re big and strong and wild. And you growl loud and show your teeth. Everyone knows you’re not a tame lion. But you’re good.” Her open hand rested on his chest, just over his heart, and that gentle touch warmed him to the core. “Down inside.”

Jayce had to try twice to speak. “You think I’m good?”

“Nope.”

What an idiot! He’d almost believed her. He should have known she was just setting him up for someth—

“I don’t think so. I
know
it.”

It was weird. Jayce had the sense that he was outside himself, watching himself stand there like a dope, staring at Shannon, mouth hanging open. But he couldn’t help it. There had to be something, some hint that she was teasing.

Nothing.

Shannon meant every word.

He reached up and closed his fingers around the lion’s head, feeling the carving with his thumb.

When Mr. Justice handed him that rod and reel the first day they got here, Jayce thought it was the best gift he’d ever received. He was wrong.

Nothing would ever compare to this.

“Do you like it?”

Jayce let go of the lion’s head, but he felt it resting against his chest. “Yeah. I like it a lot.” He gave her a gentle nudge with his elbow. “Thanks, squirt.”

He let her hug him and didn’t even have to work hard at not pulling back.

She skipped away, heading through the trees back to their campsite.

She thought he was good. Like Aslan.

No one had ever said anything like that about him before. But the weird thing was, he believed it. Not just that she meant it, but that she just might be right.

You’re kidding yourself. There’s nothing good about you, and you know it
.

For once, the voice inside didn’t bother him all that much. Because he’d made up his mind. If he wasn’t good, the way Shannon thought he was, then he’d just do whatever he needed to do to change that.

If Shannon thought he was good, then good he’d be.
Because there was no way in this world he was going to let her down.

Dan moved as silently as possible, slipping behind a large tree so Jayce wouldn’t see him.

He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop on Shannon’s conversation with the boy. He’d just been going out to look for the two of them. He was almost on top of them when he heard them talking. Not wanting to intrude, he stopped—and heard the whole exchange.

Now, Dan watched Jayce walk toward his tent, a battle raging inside him. On the one hand, he was proud of Shannon. More proud than he could say. She’d seen a hurting boy and reached out to show him real, honest love. Maybe even the first love of its kind Jayce had ever experienced.

Oh, Dan believed the boy’s grandmother loved him, but she was worn down by the hassles and failures. Shannon didn’t have any of those things to weaken her faith in Jayce.

On the other hand, the concerns Dan felt last night at the campfire came storming back to twist his innards. Shannon was at such a crucial age, where feelings got out of control way too fast. He’d seen too many little girls who should be playing with dolls getting involved and in trouble.

That would not happen to his daughter. No way. No how.

Dan tromped back toward the campsite.

Time for a little father-daughter talk.

The opportunity Dan needed came just a few hours later.

They’d all gone down to the river after lunch to get in some swimming and canoeing. After an hour or so of hard play, Aaron and Jayce decided to hike to Silent Creek. An old codger at the South Store had told them there was no place like Silent Creek for catching fish, so they figured they’d land dinner.

That left Dan and Shannon to walk back to the campsite.

She chattered away, all excitement at the fun they’d just had. And then she gave him the perfect opening. With a sigh the size of Texas, she looked up at Dan and said, “Jayce is really a wonderful boy, isn’t he, Daddy?”

Dan chose his words like a man whose answer would win or lose him a million dollars. “Yes, honey. Jayce is a great kid. Out here, with us. He’s relaxed and having fun, and I’m glad to see that.”