Shannon's Daughter (26 page)

“What
would you like me to say?”
 
With a sigh,
he resigned himself to the inevitable.
 

“I want
to know about the girl you loved.
 
What
was her name?”

“Jenny.”

“You
said you met at Oxford?”

“That’s
right.”
 
He took a deep breath and
plunged ahead.
 
Better to get it all out
than go on chipping away.
 
“We were
assigned the Faure Sonata for a concert to be held at the end of the term.
 
We got to know each other learning that
music.
 
At first I thought Jenny was just
very intense, very dedicated, but as time went on, I began to see it was
more.
 
She drove herself, forgot to eat,
didn’t
sleep.
 
Her
moods were unpredictable and there were times when I thought I must have
disappointed her, made her angry.
 
She
would lash out, and then afterward, she would be so loving, so apologetic, I’d
forget all about it.”

“The
scars, she did that?”

He
paused, caution overriding the need to reach the end of his story.
 
“What exactly is it you think you saw?”

With
her fingertip, she traced a line perpendicular to his waistband.
 
“A surgical scar, here.”
 
She continued to trace downward.
 
“And three others.”
 
Her precision sent a shiver through him.
 
“No surgeon would make cuts like that.”

Another deep breath and he found
his voice suddenly unsteady.
 
“We were
invited to attend a house party together near the end of the term.
 
Jenny had been so tense, I tried to convince
her it would help her to relax, have some fun.
 
At first I thought I’d been right, she seemed to be having a good
time.
 
We both had quite a bit to drink.
 
We went to her room, started to make love,
and then she suddenly started crying, saying things that didn’t make any sense.
 
When I tried to calm her, she screamed at me
to leave.
 
Later, I went back because I
was worried about her.”
 
He closed his
eyes for an instant, clenching his jaw.
 
“She had a knife, something she must have taken from the party.
 
She’d cut her wrist, not too deeply, but when
I walked in, she threatened to do more.
 
We struggled, and she turned on me.
 
She was in such
a frenzy
, I couldn’t control
her.”
 
For the first time he dared to
look into Peg’s face.
 
Rather than
horror, her eyes were filled with compassion, tears clinging to her
lashes.
 
“The next thing I remember is
someone pulling her off me and seeing both of us covered in blood.
 
I was trying to tell them not to call the
police, not to call my mother, begging them to take care of Jenny.
 
I remember in the ambulance I kept asking
where she was and no one would tell me.
 
My grandfather came to Oxford, saw to me and met with Jenny’s father.
 
I never spoke to her again, after that night.”

Sliding
onto his lap, she silently drew his head to her shoulder, pressing her cheek to
his forehead.
 
He put his arms around
her, refusing to think past the sweetness of the comfort she offered.
 
When her lips traveled down to his, touching
them only briefly, he pulled her lower, cradling her against his chest.
 
“You must never tell anyone about this, Peg.
 
My mother doesn’t even know.”

“I
promise.”
 

“I
meant what I said earlier, what happened then has nothing to do with us.
 
I played that piece tonight not because of
Jenny, but because of you.”

“Why
because of me?”

He
managed to smile down at her.
 
“I didn’t
like the way Silverman was looking at you.
 
I started to feel very territorial and I suppose I was trying to show
off.
 
The Faure was the most difficult of
the pieces he’d brought.
 
So you see,
sweetheart, if I’d fallen on my egotistical backside in front of the great
maestro and all of your friends, it would have been all your doing.”
 

She
seemed surprised, a scowl wrinkling her brow.
 
“You were jealous of Bernie Silverman?”
 
Throwing her arms around his neck, she laughed softly.
 
“That’s the silliest thing I’ve ever
heard.
 
Oh, Kendall, I really do love
you!
 
You make me feel so special!”

“I
suppose that’s saying something, coming from a princess.”

“No!
 
What I mean is you make
me
feel special, the girl inside what you call the princess, I
guess.”
 
The laughter gone, she studied
his face for a long moment.
 
“Thank you
for telling me what happened.”

He
tipped her chin, looking sternly into her eyes.
 
“We won’t mention it again, all right?
 
And you won’t go looking for any more scars, is that understood?”

She
nodded solemnly.
 
“Please at least think
about coming to New York.
 
If it’s a good
thing for your career, I mean.
 
I
wouldn’t want you to do it just because of me,
but.
.
.I would so love having you here all the time.”
 
Her voice had dropped to a husky whisper, her gaze lowering from his
eyes to his lips.
 

“I
can’t promise.
 
There are too many things
to consider.
 
And I
have
thought about it.
 
It
wouldn’t necessarily be the best thing for you.”

“How
can you say that?”
 
Her fingers slid
insinuatingly down the front of his shirt.

“Because
I’m not the man for you, Peg.”
 
Grasping her hand, he pressed it flat over
his heart.

Her
eyes sparked and she backed away slightly.
 
“I wish you’d stop saying that.
 
First of all, I’m not looking for a man, not in the way you mean.
 
And secondly, isn’t that for me to decide?”

“Possibly.
 
When you’re old enough to make that kind of decision.
 
For now you’ll just have to trust me.”
 
He fingered the soft chiffon draping her
shoulders.
 
“You should go to your
room.
 
What if your father should need
you during the night?”

“He
won’t.
 
He’d call Adamson, anyway.
 
Let me stay, please.”

He smiled,
urging the fabric aside.
 
“Since you asked
so nicely, I suppose you could stay for a little while.”
 
Dropping a kiss on the exposed skin, he
breathed deeply of her perfume.
 
“At this
point, I couldn’t send you away if I wanted to.
 
Do you have any idea what you do to me, brat?”

“I was
hoping you’d show me.”

He
laughed softly against her neck.
 
“Oh you
were?
 
And what if I refuse?”

“You
won’t.”

“
Which just proves I’m not the kind of man you deserve.
”
 
He covered her mouth with his before she
could argue.
 

Chapter
Twenty-four

Michael
Shannon had obvious confidence in his powers of persuasion.
 
Kendall sensed the moment they sat down in
the study for a ‘chat’ that the man was certain of the outcome.
 

It
began innocently enough with a question about his activities in London,
designed, he felt sure, to put him off the scent of Michael’s real
purpose.
 
They briefly discussed the
quartet’s prospects and Kendall’s ambition to find a serious student or two in
the coming months, someone who would provide a challenge rather than merely
require his patience.
 
Had he not been
warned by Peg of her father’s intentions, Kendall might have lowered his
guard.
 
As it was, he was braced for the
moment when the conversation took its inevitable turn.

“I’ll
be honest with you, Kendall,” Michael said with a little frown, as though
pained by what he had to say.
 
“I hate to
see you work yourself so hard, when there are other avenues open to you.”

He
hesitated for a split second before taking the bait.
 
“Other avenues, sir?”

“You
heard what Silverman said last night.
 
He’d jump at the chance to have you here in New York.”

“I
doubt he’d actually ‘jump.’
 
I’m sure he
was being polite, and at best I could expect an unbiased audition.”
 

“I
wouldn’t be so sure.
 
Don’t minimize your
talent, son.
 
You’re good, and in the
right organization, you’ll go far.”
 
He
leaned forward in his chair, lowering his voice as though they might be
overheard.
 
“Besides, Silverman owes me a
favor or two.
 
That would surely be added
incentive to find a spot for you.”
 
Kendall
flinched, imperceptibly, he hoped.
 
“Of
course, it’s all up to you.
 
I just want
you to know I’ll support you any way I can, should you decide to make the
move.”
 
Leaning even further, he went on,
“It would make Peg very happy, you know, to have you around all the time.
 
I can see how much she likes you.
 
In fact, I doubt it would take much for her
to fall in love with you.”

Surely
he wasn’t expecting a response.
 
Kendall
stared at his hands, waiting for the rest.
 
As Michael settled back in his chair, he could feel the man taking his
measure.
 

“I’d be
quite satisfied to see her with a man like
yourself
.
 
Oh, I know there’s the little issue of
religion, but that can be easily rectified.
 
It certainly isn’t as if she needs to marry money.
 
I just want her to be safe and happy, and I
believe you want the same for her.
 
I
know she should get a year or two of college behind her, but if you wanted to
seal the deal before she’s finished, you’d have my blessing.”

There
was nothing he could say without insulting this man who seemed to be making a
sincere bid for his daughter’s happiness.
 
Still avoiding his gaze, he took the only route open to him.
 
“I’m in no position, financially speaking, to
even consider a step of that sort, sir.”

Without
missing a beat, Michael plunged on.
 
“That’s
not something you’d need to worry about, son.
 
I’d be happy to set you up, nice apartment, little extra cash.
 
After the two of you were married, you would
move in here, of course.
 
I realize Peg
is spoiled, but you wouldn’t be expected to support her little extravagances.
 
Peg has her own money, always will
have.”
 

He was
staggered by how much thought Michael had put into this plan.
 
At least he hadn’t mentioned grandchildren yet.
 
Even more disturbing was that for an instant
Kendall let himself consider it as a real possibility.

The
proposal at least deserved an honest response.
 
Mustering his courage, he turned to find Michael watching expectantly
with eyes much too much like Peg’s.
 
“With
all due respect, sir, as much as I appreciate that you want to see Peg happy, it
would be grossly unfair for the two of us to strike a bargain of this
kind.
 
Peg is young.
 
She has her whole life ahead of her.
 
I’m sure you wouldn’t ask her to settle for
me before she’s had a chance to live at least a little.”

If he’d
hoped to put him off, he saw instantly that he’d failed when Michael smiled and
nodded.
 
“Humility.
 
I like that in you, Kendall.
 
You’re probably right.
 
She deserves a year or two to sow a few wild
oats—not too wild, mind you.
 
But she
doesn’t seem overly interested in men, not like a lot of girls today.
 
That said, my offer still
stands.
 
If you decide to give New
York a try, I’ll give you all the help you need.
 
And frankly, I hope the London Phil doesn’t
snap you up.
 
Selfishly, I could use you
here.
 
My health being what it is,
another man to keep an eye on Peg wouldn’t hurt.”

He was
reminded that Peg never conceded an argument, probably a genetic trait.
 
If he couldn’t commit to marrying her, he
could always agree to play bodyguard and benefit from Michael’s
generosity.
 
The irony of the situation
set his teeth on edge.
 
He’d never been
too proud to accept favors in exchange for painless service.
 
Why suddenly was he determined to walk away
from everything he wanted in life for the sake of heretofore nonexistent
scruples?

He
hoped his smile was genuine, despite the effort it took to produce it.
 
“I’m touched by your offer.
 
And I will keep what you’ve said in
mind.
 
Everything hinges on my career at
this point, as I’m sure you can understand.”

They
parted amicably enough, but as soon as Kendall left the study, he felt an
overwhelming urge to take a long walk, to clear his head and calm the
unsettling mix of emotions churning his gut.
 
Unfortunately, he caught sight of Peg, clad in crisply starched shirt
and shorts, bouncing down the stairs on long legs that instantly turned his
mind in yet another direction.
 

“Hi!
 
I was just going to sit in the garden.
 
Why don’t you join me?”
 
She landed in front of him and whispered,
“And
tell
me what you and Dad were chatting about for
so long.”

“As a
matter of fact, I was thinking of taking a walk.”
 
He tried not to notice when her face fell
into a confused little scowl.
 
“I suppose
you could come with me, if you like.”
 
No
point in calling himself a coward, he readily admitted his helplessness when it
came to Peg.
 
At least he had a remnant
of his pride intact after the “chat” with Michael.
 
Of course, he’d long ago recognized that Peg
was the stronger of the two.
 
And her
father lacked certain physical attributes which definitely gave Peg an
advantage.
 

She
popped into the study for an instant.
 
He
heard Michael chuckle and wish her a pleasant walk.
 
By the time she returned, holding out her
hand and nodding him toward the door, Kendall realized his error.
 
Even a walk along a public sidewalk with Peg
would open him to her erosive wiles, and he was in no shape currently to fend
off her questions or her charms.
 
He might
have held his own against Michael Shannon, but he doubted he’d have the same
luck with his daughter.

To his
surprise, once they fell in step on the tree-lined street, Peg had nothing to
say.
 
Subtly tucking her hand in his, she
seemed content with companionable silence.
 
Suspicious at first, he watched her out of the corner of his eye, but
the view of her fresh-scrubbed face dappled with sunlight served to erode his
caution without her needing to ply any sort of wiles at all.
 

“Your
father seems to hope I’ll take Silverman up on his offer to audition.”
 

“I
know.
 
Are you going to?”
 
She kept her gaze straight ahead, her
expression unreadable.

“Not
just now.
 
I’ll wait to hear from London
first.
 
And there are other things to
consider.
 
My students and the quartet,
not to mention the expense of a move like that.
 
I’m hardly flush with cash at the moment, or at any moment for that
matter.”

Without
blinking, she said, “Dad would help you.
 
Or I could.
 
I have my own money,
you know, a monthly allowance that’s more than I ever need.”

“Peg, I
could never take your money.
 
What is it
with you Shannons?
 
Is everything and
everybody an opportunity to show how charitable you can be?”

When
she turned her face up to him, he instantly regretted the question.
 
She seemed horrified, her eyes going dark and
filling with tears.
 
“Oh, Kendall, I
didn’t mean it that way!
 
But why
shouldn’t I help you?
 
I want you to have
the career you deserve.”
 
She withdrew
her hand and brushed at a nonexistent strand of hair, turning her gaze to the
street again.
 
“Besides, I think I’ve
fallen just a little bit in love with you after all.”

He
stopped walking.
 
He might even have
stopped breathing.
 
As Peg took several
more steps, he reached for a conveniently placed tree trunk and steadied
himself.
 
When she looked over her
shoulder, he noted a single tear shimmering on her cheek.
 
“What’s wrong?”
 
The question ended on a little sniff.

“Peg.”
 
Hardly an answer, but then again it summed up
his thoughts pretty well.
 

She
turned back, keeping the distance between them.
 
“I said just a little bit.
 
I’m
sorry, but I couldn’t help it.”

He
wanted to tell her how wrong it was, how much it would end up hurting them
both, how sorry he was for leading her to this point.
 
Instead, he opened his arms and when she
walked into them, he held her as close as he dared on a public street.
 
When he finally found his voice, he did
manage to whisper he never meant for it to happen this way.

“I’m
not sorry.
 
Why should you be?”

“Because
you’ll end up being disappointed.
 
A girl’s first love shouldn’t disappoint
her.”
 

Peg
looked up through wet lashes and smiled; nothing exceptional about the
expression yet it went straight to his heart, where it lodged like a dagger.
 
“You never have disappointed me.
 
You’ve always been my Sir Galahad.”

“But
I’m going to now.
 
I can’t come to New
York, not the way you and your father want me to.
 
I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but
I have too much pride.
 
I have to make it
on my own, if I’m ever to make it at all.”
 

She
lowered her eyes for an instant, bringing them up to meet his again filled with
sympathy.
 
“I can understand that.
 
I think I like you better because you want to
be your own man.
 
I guess we both have
things we need to prove.
 
But does that
mean we can’t also be in love?”

“That’s
a very wide ocean out there, sweetheart.
 
Who knows when one of us will be able to cross it again?”
 

She sighed
deeply.
 
“We survived three years
apart.
 
Surely it won’t be that long
again.”
 
A little smile played at her lips.
 
“I’m old enough to travel on my own now.”

He
heaved an exasperated sigh.
 
“Peg. . .”

“I
know.
 
It won’t be easy.
 
You’re going to try to tell me that I’m too
young to tie myself to a man, or that you don’t want to give up your freedom,
or that one of us will meet someone else.
 
Before you lecture me, just listen to me for a minute, please.”