Settling Old Scores: BWWM Second Chance Romance (10 page)

"Now
for the rest of the story, Willie is currently a policeman working as
a jailer downtown," Kevin said.

"Willie,
a cop? You have got to be kidding me!" Pat said.

"I
am going to call him up in the near future just to bust his chops and
catch up," Kevin said grinning.

Then,
they both got into reminiscing and telling stories. The route they
were taking took them right through the gritty part of downtown. They
passed a strip joint that was frequented by an all black clientele.
"You know, his other sister is a stripper in that joint, the
last time I heard," Pat said.

"Tammy
Smith is a stripper in there?" Kevin said.

"I
know she was at one time anyway. I think the McCanns had something to
do with recruiting her into that profession," Pat said.

"The
McCanns? Good thing I didn't stop there and run into her," Kevin
replied, as what Pat had just said registered with him fully.

"Yeah,
your white ass wouldn't have made it out of there alive if you went
in and made a spectacle with her in that place," Patrica said.

"You
know the cops could question people all night long, and everyone
would say they never saw a thing, either," Kevin said.

"You
are the same way. You don't trust cops too much yourself," Pat
said.

"You
are right about that. I don't trust them. I don't like nuns or
priests either. You can say I have a problem with authority if you
want. But think about it, I had no problem with military discipline.
I thrived under it, actually. It turns out, Willie did, too. The big
difference was the levels of hypocrisy in the military were so much
less," Kevin said.

17.
Finding Matt

Kevin
turned onto another street suddenly. "Should we look and see if
Matt is out and about this morning?" he asked.

"Why
not?"Pat said.

They
cruised a couple of places and were about to give up when they
spotted him setting up his panhandling shop for the day. Kevin eased
into a parking space on the street. The meters were free on
Saturdays, and the crowds hadn't arrived for the day yet. Kevin and
Pat got out of the car and walked up to Matt. He spotted them right
away.

Matt
waved to Pat and reached out a hand to Kevin. "Long time no see.
I thought you moved down South or something," he said.

They
talked a little bit. Matt seemed to have all his senses about him
today. His clothes were cleaner. Just a little twitchy. He didn't
seem to remember that Kevin had tried to talk to him just a few days
earlier.

"I
just got out of the tank," he said.

"Yeah,
I know that Matt. I was there when the cops picked you up,"
Kevin said.

"Oh,
I don't remember that part. I do remember I owe my dealer some money.
Can you give me any?" asked Matt.

"Matt,
we won't give you money for drugs. You need to get and stay straight.
If you want, we will take you over to the VA right now and get you
some help. Aren't you tired of living like this? I hate to see you
like this. I know that," Kevin said.

"I
have tried that route before. It don't work for me. Will you sell me
a gun? I saw you had a gun one time. You tackled the guy with the
knife and Willie clubbed him. You had a gun then," Matt said out
of the blue.

Kevin
glanced at Pat nervously. He doubted if she had ever heard this
before. He knew she wouldn't like hearing it, either. She looked
aghast. Kevin never told anyone besides Willie that he was sometimes
armed in the neighborhood. He wondered how many people knew it, and
he wondered how Matt knew it. Kevin had been outed, but he wasn't
going to lie about it or deny it.

"There
is no way I would sell you a gun Matt. I know you must get in trouble
with drug dealers at times. I would be an idiot to do that though. It
is one more reason to change course. Think about it. I will be back
here tomorrow to hound you again, and the next day, and the next ones
after that too," Kevin said.

Pat
tried talking to him too. "We care about you Matt, why don't you
come with us?" she said.

Matt
refused steadfastly. After a while, Kevin started to back away
slowly, still hopeful.

"We
will see you tomorrow, and buy you breakfast," Pat said.

Then
Kevin and Patrica walked away leaving Matt staring at them as they
went. Neither one said anything as they got back in the truck and
pulled away from the curb. Kevin glanced nervously at Pat. She looked
at him expectantly. "What was the gun thing all about?" she
asked.

Kevin
told her that story too. "That is the second time the story has
come up in the past few days. Janet said that Willie thinks I may
have saved his life that time," he concluded.

"What
were you doing with a gun?" she asked.

"Do
you remember what happened to us? I hit a guy with a folding chair
for disrespecting you. He ended up getting stitches. His friends had
a hard on for me, and for you, too. The girl that tripped you when
you were playing basketball in the girls’ gym a couple of weeks
later was his cousin. You ended up on crutches for about three
months. I wasn't about to get caught out in the open by a bunch of
older guys looking to fuck me up. I was on their list, too. Like a
dummy, I went to the Sporting Goods place on the edge of town and
talked the store owner, who wasn't all that bright, into selling me a
9mm Spanish Civil War semi-auto. It cost me 20 bucks. In those days,
the guy sold guns to everyone. He had the best selection of nickel
plated 32 caliber revolvers with pearly handles you ever saw. You
know who he was selling them to," Kevin said.

"I
didn't know she was his cousin. I thought it was about something
else," Pat said.

"Well
that girl was his cousin. Remember, he was way older and bigger than
me. I don't know that I was that bright either. The trouble with
semi-autos is that they throw brass all over a shooting scene. The
gun was probably traceable and the brass could be linked to the gun
by a good police crime lab. My dad found the gun at my house one day
and took it away from me," Kevin said.

"Then,
when you were on crutches, you gained about twenty pounds; about half
of it went to your chest, the other half went to your butt. Talk
about a bust developer! All the sudden, you were a hot commodity and
every boy in school was drooling over you," Kevin said.

"I
never realized I was having that effect on all these males. I always
thought that they thought I was easy for some reason," she said.

"You
will recall I did start to notice your transformation too. I tried to
get something going with you, but you didn't want any part of it,"
Kevin said.

"I
remember the look on your face when you went grabbed the chair, your
eyes were black with rage. An adolescent male with that kind of
temper and a gun would be a prescription for disaster," Pat
said.

"I
was out of control most of my adolescence. That is why I feel such
gratitude towards you for keeping me in check, and I will admit it,
keeping me at bay too," Kevin said.

"Did
you go around telling your friends that you were getting laid every
night with me? Is that why everyone assumed I was easy. I deserve to
know!" said Pat.

"Believe
me Pat, I never did that. Occasionally, some of the guys would ask if
I was getting in your pants. I am not the kind to Kiss & Tell as
Bogart would say. I never said I did, not once. For one thing, it
wasn't true. The other part of it was that I didn't want to ruin a
friendship that I valued by spreading rumors like that," Kevin
said emphatically.

"Your
big problem with the stupidity of carrying a gun is that it was a
semi auto and threw brass all over? The correct answer is that you
could have shot someone and messed up your life. That is what I mean
about not understanding you. Even now, you don't seem to get how
serious carrying a gun is!" reiterated Pat.

"Believe
me, I get it. In that environment, I felt a need. I was just saying
if I did it again, I would make sure I had an untraceable revolver
and not a semi auto from a crime detection standpoint. Part of your
problem is that you are afraid of guns. I am cocky enough to think I
could get away with shooting someone if I had to," said Kevin.

"There
is that attitude that will get you eventually," Pat said.

"Relax!
I am not going to shoot anyone that was like a decade ago," said
Kevin.

"Do
you think his dealer would really harm him over a fifty buck debt?"
she asked.

"They
are not nice people; I know that. Somehow, they must figure he's good
for it. Remember, Matt is a survivor, and he has a surprising amount
of wits about him despite all the harm he's done himself. I wonder if
I could at least talk him into going to the VA for a physical and
some dental work," Kevin said.

"Regardless
of how this turns out, you can always know that you tried to get him
some help," she said reassuringly.

"We
both know that you don't always get fairytale results in life,"
Kevin said.

18.
The Revelation

Kevin
and Pat talked more about Matt as they rode. They decided it wasn't
going to work to just jump him and suggest that he go to treatment
somewhere. They needed to establish a rapport, see what his real
problems were and find some common ground if they could. In short,
Kevin blew it with his naive direct approach.

Kevin
thought about mentioning his experiences hauling munitions and
explosives. Matt could relate better since both situations involved
being in closed-in spaces and being scared. Maybe, just maybe, if
they got him to go in for dental work at least, and got him talking,
they could get him to seek further help.

"Kevin,
you have become a regular Southern Redneck with your old pickup, and
eating at greasy spoon joints. Was it grits, biscuits, and gravy you
had? I suppose if I turn on the radio, it will be on a Country
Western station. Where is your easy rider rifle rack? I know now you
are a closet firearms carrying guy. One that thinks a semi auto is
bad to use to shoot someone since it throws brass all over the
place," Pat needled Kevin.

"Tell
you what. I am just going to take a big chaw of tobacco and ignore
all that you just said right there," Kevin drawled.

"There
are things I am learning about you I never had a clue about,"
she said giving him a long look.

"The
South is wearing off on me, I will admit it. They know how to live
down there," said Kevin.

Then
he told her more about the South. All the good old boys he worked
with and the little Baptist church in every town. Each one with a
choir where most of Motown got its singers from. Where people like
Ronald White came up with the opening guitar riff of
My
Girl
as
a variation of an old gospel opener. Perfect pentatonic scales, five
notes. He told her about southern singers with “corn bread in
their voices”, like David Ruffin, and Wilson Pickett. Ruffin's
voice was so good
Norman
Whitfield
wrote songs for his voice specifically on more than one
occasion. He told her about how good Southern cooking was, and
Carolina BBQ. How sweet spring was in the South and how mild the
winters were. He told her how isolated the barrier islands had been
until developers discovered them. How isolated the Gullah were when
they lived there. Kevin mentioned the Pat Conroy book,
The
Water is Wide
and
about his first year of teaching in an island school. Then he offered
to take her to Hilton Head when winter break came.

"I
drove mom down to Shipyard Plantation when she moved. The last
stretch is through these winding wooded and swampy roads. We had been
driving for hours. We pulled in to get gas. There are these old black
guys sitting on lawn chairs in front of the place. Mom jumps out of
the car and she is like the crazy white Yankee bitch from hell trying
to get these guys going to pump the gas. They moved like molasses.
She grabs the nozzle & starts to do it herself. They were looking
at her like she was a she-devil. Then, she opens her mouth and out
comes the Southern accent. Then, they are really puzzled. They still
don't move any faster. They have one speed and it ain't fast. We
could stay with my mom and do day trips from there. My favorite place
is Jekyll Island. When you get down there, you feel like you are on
the edge of nowhere,” he said.