Servant of the Bones (47 page)

“How long ago was all this?” I asked.

“About a month ago. But I didn’t even think of it before now, all this. I mean, I knew in my heart that he had been responsible for Esther’s death, I knew when I heard him make his speech about terrorism and enemies that he’d been lying. He was too
prepared
for Esther’s death! But honestly, frankly, do you think he
would
kill his own daughter because of all this?”

“Yes, I do, but I see a large design here,” I said. “And the Rebbe. You never met or spoke to the Rebbe?”

“No,” she said. “I wouldn’t go over there to be rejected. I have great reverence for those people, my parents were Hasidim from Poland. But no, I know that kind of old man.”

“Well, let me tell you this. That old man also accused Gregory of killing Esther. And he wanted to know the same thing you wanted to know, why.”

“Do you realize what this means?” she said. “If he would kill Esther to protect the family secret, then he might kill Nathan!”

“Has there been no call from Nathan concerning this necklace?” I asked. “I know how the Hasidim live, but this is news, diamonds, you know, talk of valuable diamonds snatched by terrorists.”

“No, no call that I know of, but you see, I’m cut off, I was surrounded by the Minders. And Gregory himself didn’t even come up with the necklace part till the day after the murder. In his first speech, all he did was talk about enemies. Then the next day he…my god, maybe that’s when Nathan called him, but then he wouldn’t have told such a lie or…Why in the hell did he bring up the necklace?”

I was quietly absorbing all these words.

“I think I can figure it out,” I said. “One thing is true, I foiled his plan. His plan is big. His design is big. I foiled it by killing those tramps that murdered her. So that blurred his
attempt at calling it all terrorism. Those men cannot be traced to terrorists, can they?”

“No, not at all. Half the world is crying with him, and others are laughing at him. The men were bums out of some town in south Texas, bums. Now Gregory claims his enemies will use any means to hurt him and these bums were part of it and the theft was to give them badly needed wealth to fight his church.”

“Let’s leave the necklace for a moment. He still played up the terrorist part, and for some strange reason included the necklace. Now listen, I have to ask you. Why are there laboratories in the Temple of the Mind? Why?”

“Laboratories?” she asked. “I have no idea. I didn’t even know there were. Of course there’s Gregory’s own doctor, who pumps him up with Human Growth Hormone and special protein drinks and anything else he can to keep his youth and strength, and they do have some kind of hospital room so that if Gregory runs a temperature one degree above normal, his doctor can examine him in it, but there are no laboratories as such, not as far as I know.”

“No, no, I mean big laboratories where people are working with chemicals and computers. Huge laboratories with sterile storage and people even dressed in funny clothes to protect themselves. I saw this tonight. I saw this in the Temple of the Mind. I saw some people wearing orange clothes that covered their whole bodies. I didn’t think of it at the time. I was just looking for Gregory…”

“Orange suits, you’re talking about suits that protect people from viruses. Good Lord, is there disease at the heart of this? Gregory has some disease? What the hell did he do to Nathan in the hospital!”

“I think I know. He didn’t hurt his brother. And there is no disease in Gregory, I can tell you that for sure, or in the Rebbe. I would have known the moment I saw them. I sense these things.”

She winced, the mere thought of her own sickness suddenly confusing her and muddling her mind.

“What does the Temple do that would require a team of
doctors, a big team of brilliant men ever ready at Gregory’s command? Research geniuses with microscopes and all kinds of equipment?”

“I don’t know,” she said again. “Of course one time they did contemplate a line of products, you know, trash like spiritually cleansing shampoo and ‘wash away evil vibrations soap’—”

I laughed, I couldn’t help it. She smiled.

“But we talked him out of that. He struck some incredibly lucrative deal with a New York designer for all the stock at his resorts and on his boats, and in his jungles…”

“There we are again, boats, planes, jungles, doctors, a necklace, a twin brother.”

“What are you saying?”

“Look, Rachel, an identical twin is not just a brother, he is a duplicate of the man, and here we have a twin unknown to the world, and not recognized every day of the week perhaps because he wears the beard and the locks of the Hasidim. There are things one can do with an identical twin.”

She stared at me. She was silent. Then a wince of pain came again.

“Look, I have to have water,” I said. “I’ll bring you some water.”

“That would be good. Cold water. My throat is sore, I can’t…”

She sank back down.

I hurried through the beautiful garden, and entered what seemed a grand storage place for fine foods, and sure enough, there were plastic bottles of water galore in the refrigerator. I brought two of these bottles and a lovely crystal glass which I picked off a shelf.

I sat down by her and gave her water first. She had covered herself now. She drank. I drank.

I really was exhausted. This was not the time to be exhausted, not the time to risk sleeping and letting this body disappear. I drank more of the water, and I wondered what had come out of my body into her, had it been real seed, or just a semblance?

I remembered something about Samuel. Samuel laughing at the Catholic nuns who claimed to be made pregnant by spirits. I remembered that from Strasbourg and then another lovely memory came, it was all sensory, it had to do with Zurvan, and I remember him saying, ‘You can do it, yes, but it will take away your energy and you are never to seek a woman without my permission.’ ”

I couldn’t remember the speaker, only the love, and the garden, and the words, and how much it was like this.
It will take away your energy
. I had to stay awake.

“What if we’re wrong?” she said. “And he had nothing to do with Esther’s death. He’s a man who uses everything. He used her death but that doesn’t mean—”

“The Rebbe said he killed her. I think he killed her. But there’s more at stake. This temple of his, does it preach anything unique or of unique value?”

“Not really; as I explained, he invented the creed with a computer program. It’s the nearest thing to a creedless creed you can imagine.”

She sighed. She told me there was a dressing gown in the closet. Would I bring it to her? She was feeling a little cold. She said there were robes, too, if I wanted them. I did, but not because I was cold. It was a Persian or Babylonian disinclination to be naked.

I found a thick blue robe that fell to the floor, with a tie for the waist, and wrapped myself in this, feeling a little trapped, but it was fine for now, and I needed all my power.

I brought the negligee to her. It was gold like so much in the room, and pure silk and full of beaded work rather like that of the dark scarf. She sat up and I helped her put it on, and I buttoned the pearl buttons for her, and then tied the sash. I buttoned the pearls at her wrists.

She stared at me.

“I have something else,” she said, “that I want you to know.”

“Tell me,” I said, sitting beside her and taking her hand. “Gregory called me tonight right before the plane landed in Miami. He told me
you
killed Esther. He said you were seen at
the scene of the crime. I’d seen your picture in the magazine, but I knew it was a stupid lie. I was about to hang up on him. It’s useless, you know, asking him to be reasonable, but then he really went off the deep end. He said you were a ghost, and you needed to take Esther’s place in the world, that’s how you got in.”

“That is trash!” I whispered. “He is a smooth-tongued man.”

“That’s what I thought. I just didn’t believe it. But something seemed very certain to me then. You are here because of Esther’s death. You are, and you’re here to kill Gregory. I wish you would promise me, whatever happens, you’ll kill him. I know it’s a terrible thing I’m saying.”

“Not to me,” I said. “I would like to kill him but not before this mystery is solved.”

“Can you possibly see to Nathan? See that he’s safe?”

“I can do that,” I said, “but I have grave suspicions on that. Never mind. Be assured, whatever happens, I will get to the bottom of it, and Gregory will pay with his life.”

“Laboratories,” she said. “You know he’s crazy, Gregory. He believes he is here to save the world. He goes to other countries, he asks for reception by dictators and establishes temples in countries that…and then all this about terrorism. You know,” she said as she lay back down on the pillows. “You can’t go wrong killing him. This Temple is a racket. It’s garbage, and it bleeds people, takes their savings, their fortunes…”

She closed her eyes, and suddenly went still, so still that her eyes half-opened and I could see only the whites.

“Rachel!” I said. “Rachel!” I shook her shoulder.

“I’m alive, Azriel,” she said softly without moving anything but her lips. Her dark brows moved just a little. She didn’t open her eyes. “I’m here,” she said. “Will you cover me, Azriel? Even now I’m cold. It’s warm, isn’t it?”

“The breeze is wondrously warm,” I said.

“Open all the windows then. But cover me. What is it? What’s the matter with you?”

All the windows
were
open, even the big window doors to
my left that looked out on a terrace above the ocean. But I didn’t disturb her by saying so.

I was suddenly startled. I noticed her arms for the first time. Really beheld them beneath the sheer silk.

“Your arms, I’ve covered them with bruises! Look what I’ve done to you.”

“That doesn’t matter,” she said. “That’s nothing. It’s only one of the drugs thinning the blood, makes me bruise without feeling it. I loved it, your being in my arms. Come here, will you stay with me? You know, I suspect I’m going to die right away. I left behind all the drugs that were keeping me going.”

I didn’t answer her but I knew she was going to die. Her heartbeat was too slow. Her fingers had a bluish tinge to them.

I lay down beside her, and covered her with the tapestried draperies that lay all over the bed, what are called “throws” and “lap blankets,” though I had not realized it or thought of it.

She was nice and warm and she lay against me.

“I laughed so hard when he said you were a ghost and you killed Esther to get into the world. And yet I knew you weren’t a human being. I knew it. You’d vanished from the plane. I knew it. And yet I thought Gregory was so hysterically funny telling me all this black magic, that Esther had to be sacrificed like a lamb so that you could come into the world and evil beings had done it. He said you’d kill me. He said if I didn’t come back, he’d alert the police. I don’t want him coming in here, disturbing me. I don’t want him to.”

“I won’t let him,” I said. “Rest now. I want to think. I want to remember the laboratories and the men in the orange suits. I want to see the great scheme.”

It was a horrid thing to look at, her purplish bruises, and I felt shame that I hadn’t been more delicate, hadn’t even watched for such a thing, hadn’t looked for anything but the age-old juiciness, and for all the rest, what did I care.

I held her arms. I kissed these places, and I could see where needles had made holes in her, and I could see where bandages had been ripped from her, and all the fleece was gone.

“Rachel, you are suffering, and I’ve made this worse for you,” I said. “Let me get for you what you need. Send me. Tell
me. I can get anything in the world for you, Rachel. That’s my nature. Do you have doctors of great skill? Only tell me who they are. I’ll be lost in the winds if I roam searching for doctors and magicians. Guide me. Send me. Send me now for whatever it is…”

“No.”

I studied her silent face; her smile had not changed. She seemed half-asleep; I realized she was singing, or humming with her lips closed. Her hands were too cold.

I sighed; this was the agony that comes with loving; this was just as fresh as if it had never happened to me before. This was just as hurtful and cruel as if I were breathing and young.

“Don’t worry,” she whispered. “All the best doctors in the world have done their damnedest to cure Gregory Belkin’s wife. Besides…I want to…”

“…be with Esther.”

“Yes, do you think I will be?”

“Yes, I do,” I said. “I saw her go up in a pure light.” I wanted to add, “One way or another, you’ll be with her.” But I didn’t add it. I didn’t know whether she believed we were all tiny flames that went back into God, or that we had a Paradise where we could kiss and hold each other. As for me, I believed we had a Paradise, and I had a dim memory of flying high once, to the very heights, and of gentle spirits up there concealing something from me.

I lay back. I had been so sure I wanted to die. And now the flame of life that blazed still in her, melting her like a candle, seemed utterly precious to me.

I wanted to try to cure her. I looked at her and tried to see all the workings of her, each thing connected to the next thing, and all bound with veins like woven gold thread.

I did lay my hands on her, and I did pray. I let my hair rest on her face. I prayed in my heart to all the gods.

She stirred. “What did you say, Azriel?” she said. She uttered some words. At first I didn’t understand them. Then I realized it was Yiddish she was speaking. “Were you speaking Hebrew?” she asked me.

“Just praying, my darling,” I said. “Think nothing of it.” She took a deep breath and laid her hand on my chest, as if the very act of lifting her hand and setting it down exhausted her. I put my hand over hers. Too cold, her little hands. I made a heat for us both.

“You’re really staying with me, aren’t you?”

“Why does that surprise you?” I asked.

“I don’t know. Because people try to get away from you when they know you’re really dying. Those bad nights, when I was at my worst, the doctors didn’t come, the nurses stayed away. Even Gregory wouldn’t come. The crisis would pass, and then they would all come. And you, you are staying with me. Doesn’t the air smell good? And the light. Just the light of the night sky.”