Serendipity (Inevitable) (36 page)

“Jesus.” She stared at him in disbelief. “That’s kind of sick, Nathan. And completely unreasonable. What am I supposed to do – live like a nun while you’re engaged to someone else? In what universe is that fair?”

“I never said it was fair or reasonable.” He looked chagrined. “I’m just telling you how I felt last night. I realize this whole situation is completely and utterly fucked up.”

She shook her head. “I should have never taken this job. And when I realized you were my employer, I should have quit. We’re fooling ourselves by thinking we can work together anymore. It’s – this is too hard for me, Nathan.”

“I know, baby. And I’ve made it even more difficult for you, haven’t I? Telling you on the one hand that we have to be strictly professional with each other, keeping my distance from you, but still wanting you on the other hand, so much that I was like a psycho stalker last night.” He squeezed her hand. “Please tell me I didn’t hurt you. I know I was rough and you felt so tight.”

“You didn’t hurt me. I obviously enjoyed what we did. It – I haven’t been with anyone else since you last September. And no, I didn’t do anything with Todd last night, either. He was too busy fielding texts from other women.”

“He’s a loser. He doesn’t even deserve to be in the same room with you.” He brought her hand to his lips. “But then, neither do I. I hope – some of the things I said – the dirty talk -“

She gave him a small smile. “It’s okay. You must know that it’s a huge turn-on for me. Talking dirty didn’t make me feel dirty, Nathan. It’s what you did afterwards that made me feel like a whore.”

“Going home with Cameron.” At her nod, he exhaled deeply. “I know. She was furious, by the way. That I drank too much and wasn’t in the mood for – uh, you know.”

Julia turned her face away. “Yes, I get the picture. And I suppose I should say I’m sorry but I’m really, really not. The way you felt about Todd last night – imagine feeling that way all the time.”

“It would fucking kill me to imagine you belonging to someone else,” he whispered. “Julia – it’s not the same with her, believe me. I don’t feel-“

“No details, okay?” she interrupted harshly. “And no comparisons. And I hope like hell that I’m not going to get some sort of third party disease or infection from her. In case you forgot, you didn’t use a condom last night.”

“No, but I always use one with her.” At Julia’s quizzical expression he explained further. “Oh, she’s on birth control – when she remembers to take it, that is. After the third time she forgot to take a pill, I decided I couldn’t rely on her anymore and always use a condom no matter what.” He gave her hand another squeeze. “I hope that helps to set your worries at ease. As well as know that you’re the only woman I’ve ever been inside bare.”

Julia felt her cheeks grow hot. “Um, should I be flattered at that knowledge?”

He chuckled. “I don’t know about flattered, but it’s certainly the truth. When I met you again that night in New York and knew we were really going to happen, I didn’t want anything between us. You were perfect, we were perfect together.”

She pulled her hand from his grasp and reached for her yoga bag. “Until the night was over and reality set in, that is. I need to go, Nathan. I can’t talk about this anymore. It’s too hard.”

“I know, baby. I just needed to tell you how sorry I am and make sure you’re okay.”

Her eyes shimmered with tears. “But I’m not okay, don’t you get it? I don’t mean physically – I already told you that. But this is wrecking me emotionally, Nathan. It’s why I have to find another job, not see you anymore. It breaks my heart every single day to see you and want you so much but know you belong to someone else. If this keeps up much longer, I’m going to be like Angela – a shell of her former self.”

“Christ, what a mess.” He buried his face in his hands. “I’ve managed to fuck up both of our lives, haven’t I? Julia – don’t leave your job. Please. We’ll work something out. I – I’ve got some hard decisions to make. And soon.”

“What sort of decisions?”

He picked an imaginary piece of lint from his sweater, avoiding her gaze. “I need to decide if staying with Cameron while I’m so obviously attracted to you is fairer to her than breaking off our engagement and hurting her.”

“Well, you certainly can’t ask her opinion on the matter, can you?” she asked bitterly. “And I’m sure you can guess my choice. Sorry, but you’re on your own with this one.”

“Yeah, I’ve pretty much figured that out already.” He blew out a breath. “Just – have a little patience with me, okay? This isn’t easy, Julia. One way or another somebody gets hurt. And that’s the last thing I ever intended to happen.”

“I’ll try, Nathan. But don’t make things harder for me in the interim, okay? In fact, unless it’s about business, please leave me alone,” she pleaded.

“Julia -“

She stood and picked up her mat bag. “I mean it. I’ve been in this sort of situation before, remember? I won’t ever be the other woman again. So unless you’re going to tell me your engagement is broken, it’s strictly business from here on. Thanks for the coffee.”

Slinging the bag over her shoulder, she strode out of the coffeehouse without a backwards glance.

Chapter Fourteen

June

“Nathan, do you have a moment? I’d like to speak with you privately.”

Nathan glanced up in surprise at Ian’s softly spoken request. “Of course. Should we adjourn to your office?”

“Yes, let’s do that. This won’t take long.”

Nathan glanced across the large conference room table, noticing that Julia was deep in conversation with two of Ian’s staff. Since they had arrived here for the meeting separately, it wouldn’t be necessary for him to tell her to wait for a ride back.

It had been ten days since the awards banquet, and things had been strictly business between them since. In fact, they had seen very little of each other this past week and a half, and the few times they’d met had been stilted, brief, and uncomfortable.

And despite nightly debates with himself, he wasn’t any closer to making a decision about the future of his engagement to Cameron. Each time he made up his mind to break things off with her so he could be with Julia, he would get a guilty conscience, telling himself that wasn’t the right reason to end things. And then, each time he tried to think of what words he might use to actually break up with Cameron, a cold chill went through his entire body as he imagined how furious she would be and how she would react.

But then, on the flip side, he’d remember in all too vivid detail what it felt like to lick Julia’s nipples, to thrust his fingers inside her hot, tight core, the bliss of coming hard after fucking her brains out. And the thought of never knowing those delights ever again left an empty feeling inside of him. In fact, in every possible way, Julia was probably the perfect woman for him. It went way beyond sex, too, though she was unquestionably the best he’d ever had by far. She was sweet and kind and gorgeous; she was in the same line of work and understood his business, especially since her own father was one of the greatest architects of modern day; she was neat and tidy and organized from the looks of her office. And, perhaps more important than anything else, his mother adored her. And when a guy’s mom gave her unsolicited approval – well, he ought to read the writing on the wall and know that this girl was the one. It was just too damned bad that he was already committed to another girl.

Ian’s office was massive and spacious, with its own small conference table and en suite bathroom. It was easily twice the size of Nathan’s own office. But then, as successful as Nathan had become in recent years, he certainly wasn’t in charge of several dozen exclusive five-star hotels and resorts, or a billionaire like Ian and his family members were.

“Please, sit.” Ian waved a hand at the grouping of love seats and chairs arranged in a square around a low table. “This really won’t take long. I hesitate to mention this at all, but I did feel you ought to be aware.”

Nathan frowned as he took a seat. “Is there a problem with the hotel design? If so, we’ll need to move fast since we break ground in a month.”

“No, not at all. It’s nothing to do with the hotel, all of that has long been settled. This is about Julia.”

That startled him. “Julia? What about her?” A sudden disturbing thought entered his mind. “Are you thinking of asking her out? Is that what this is about?”

Ian gave a hoot of laughter, an oddly irreverent sound for someone who was always the refined, reserved gentleman. “No, that’s not it, either, I assure you. Not that she isn’t an extraordinarily beautiful woman who I’m certain would be a delightful companion. But I never mix business with pleasure. Beside, I’m well aware that the two of you are very attracted to each other. I wouldn’t dream of interfering with that.”

Nathan gaped at him. “Excuse me?”

Ian chuckled. “It isn’t often that I can shock you, Nathan, but I see this is one of those rare occasions. Oh, I’m aware that you’re engaged, but it’s been obvious to me from the first time I saw the two of you together that there’s something there.”

Nathan fidgeted, suddenly ill at ease with this conversation. “As you’ve mentioned, she’s a beautiful woman. I can appreciate that as much as the next man. But that doesn’t mean there’s anything between us. Any more than there is between you and Tessa.”

Now it was Ian’s turn to look startled. “Tessa? Good God, what made you think of her? She’s a married woman and far, far too young for me in any event.
And
my employee, so off limits in every possible way.”

“Sorry,” apologized Nathan. “I didn’t mean to suggest anything inappropriate. Julia is actually the one who’s convinced you’re attracted to Tessa.”

Ian smiled wryly. “Well, I think Julia is a true romantic but in this case her imagination is getting the better of her. Tessa is a sweet, lovely girl and an exemplary employee but that’s the extent of it. Now, what I wanted to tell you – in strictest confidence, of course – was that Julia has brought up the subject of working for the Gregson Group with me.”

“What?” This time Nathan was truly shocked. “Was this recent?”

Ian nodded. “Very. Just a few days ago, in fact. She’s sworn me to secrecy but I consider you a friend as well as a business partner, Nathan, so I thought I should tell you regardless.”

Nathan frowned. “Technically, she works for Travis. I wonder why you haven’t told him.”

Ian rolled his eyes. “Because Mr. Headley is a known gossip and wouldn’t keep it quiet. He’d very likely confront Julia about it, and I did promise her it would be kept a secret for now.”

“So what did you tell her? About the possibility of a job, that is?”

Ian shrugged. “I kept it rather non-committal. Asked her what sort of job she might be interested in, given that we don’t employ interior designers directly. Seems that she’s always wanted to live in Paris, so she’d love to work at one of our hotels there in some capacity. I told her I’d see what I could find out. I haven’t, however, made any such inquiries just yet. Not until I had the opportunity to discuss this with you first.”

“I see. Well, I do appreciate the heads up, Ian. I’m rather surprised, though. I thought Julia liked her current position, and she’s certainly doing a fantastic job.”

Ian shook his head. “Well, of course she does, Nathan. It’s quite obvious – to me, at least – that the real reason she’s considering leaving has nothing to do with her job satisfaction and everything to do with an uncomfortable office environment.”

Nathan sighed. “And you think this situation involves me?”

Ian gave him a wise smile. “Oh, I don’t think, old chap. I know it does. Oh, she didn’t say that, of course, even when I came out and asked her directly. But I consider myself quite a good judge of people, Nathan – you have to be in my position. And that girl is very much in love with you. That’s why she’s looking at other job options – because it’s too difficult working in the same office with you while you’re set to marry someone else.”

“Please don’t say anything to Travis about this,” pleaded Nathan. “He’d have my head if he learned about this and thought I was the reason behind it.”

“I won’t say a word. But you also can’t speak to Julia about it. Our conversation was in strictest confidence. If you don’t want her to leave, you’ll have to figure out a different way to keep her.”

“Yeah.” Nathan expelled a tense sigh. “Fresh out of ideas here. You got any?”

Ian held up his hands. “Far be it from me to give you that sort of advice. I’m a lifelong bachelor with one broken engagement along the way. I hope you’ll forgive my frankness, Nathan. I certainly don’t mean to butt into your personal business.”

“I know you don’t. And I do appreciate learning about this. Please tell me if there are any new developments.”

“You have my word. Let’s hope you can figure out a way to retain her. As much as I’d love to have her working for my company, I’d prefer to work with her as a designer for our hotels.”

Nathan was still dumbstruck as he left Ian’s office, both at the knowledge that Julia was actually taking steps to find another job, and at the revelation that Ian Gregson was quite aware that he was attracted to Julia. Apparently he hadn’t been as discreet as he’d imagined, and he wondered in something of a panic who else might suspect – that nosy bastard Travis, the sardonic Courtney, his very observant PA Robyn, his own mother for God’s sake.

He was still pondering how much damage control he might have to do as he was walking to the elevator, and stopped short to see Julia also there waiting for a car to arrive.

She looked as elegantly beautiful and alluring as ever today in a sleeveless pale blue crepe sheath dress that hugged all of her curves, and silver gray platform pumps. She’d wound all of her thick, abundant locks into a knot at her nape, a style that emphasized her perfect bone structure. Her lips – those lush, tempting lips – were shiny with pale pink gloss.

She glanced up at his approach but didn’t smile. “On your way back to the office?”

“Yes. The meeting went well today, don’t you think?”