Seized (Hostage Rescue Team Series, #7) (3 page)

Her long, chocolate-brown hair was loose in slight waves around her bronzed shoulders, that soft pink dress leaving her arms and calves bare to his ravenous gaze. And her curves. Sweet baby Jesus, her
curves
.

The generous swell of her breasts was outlined perfectly by the cut of her dress, which fit her snugly around the chest and waist before flaring out to drape over her hips and ended just below her knees. The outfit was pretty and feminine, could have been on the demure side on someone else, but on her it screamed sex.

She looked like a pin-up model and in those heels that accentuated the muscles in her lower legs, she was the hottest thing he’d ever seen. The confident set of her shoulders, the way she owned a room the moment she set foot in it, that worked for him in a major way.

Seeing her made him ache with the need to follow the shape of those curves with his hands, then his mouth, watch her beautiful golden-brown eyes go heavy-lidded with need and arousal while he stripped her slowly and revealed every inch of her smooth skin.

Never gonna happen, man. Get over it.

She headed toward the table. Ethan had stopped and turned back to her, a surprised smile on his face. Apparently he hadn’t known she was coming either.

She hugged her brother, smiled at whatever Ethan said, then followed him toward the table, glancing around the bar as she walked. Sawyer stood rooted to the spot, practically paralyzed with a combination of dread and excitement, heart thudding with it.

The last time they’d seen each other he’d crossed a line he never should have crossed and kissed her at that hospital in Miami. Since then things had been...awkward between them, to say the least.

And Ethan didn’t know about it. Could never know. If he found out there’d be hell to pay and Sawyer would lose everyone he—

His gut twisted at the thought.
No.
He couldn’t let that happen. Not ever.

As if sensing his stare, Carmela glanced over and spotted him beside the pool table. Her stride faltered for an instant. Then she put on a smile he could tell was forced and nodded at him once before turning her head and walking on by without a second glance.

The combination of her stiffness and that dismissal made him feel even shittier.

He watched her glide past him, a sense of dread invading him.

At the hospital that day he’d wanted way more than a kiss from her, and he was pretty sure she’d wanted to give him more, but they couldn’t have it. And since then he’d been careful to keep his distance from her. She’d obviously taken the hint because she hadn’t e-mailed or called once, when they’d normally talked at least once a week and had for almost two years.

He felt like shit about that too.

“You wanna take a break?”

Sawyer glanced over at Blackwell, who was standing next to the pool table waiting for Sawyer to take his turn. He could tell from his teammate’s wry grin that he’d seen why Sawyer’s concentration was shot all to hell. “In a minute, yeah. I’ll take my shot, then go say hi.”

He rounded the end of the table to take his shot, his hand curled around his pool cue, fingers clenching tight as an ache bloomed in the center of his chest. Christ, he’d made a hell of a mess of things. He couldn’t undo what he’d already done, and to be fair to her he knew he should just let it be, let her think he didn’t want anything more to do with her.

Problem was, that was a lie he wasn’t prepared to live with.

––––––––

C
armela hugged her shocked brother and tried to pretend that Sawyer wasn’t standing in the corner of the pub, just forty feet away. But he was, and the image of him was now seared into her brain.

Wearing his trademark black Stetson and at over six feet tall, he was impossible to miss. Combined with that white T-shirt that emphasized the rich brown of his skin and hugged every inch of his muscular torso and a pair of faded jeans that clung to his powerful thighs, he was mouthwatering.

She could feel the weight of his dark brown stare from clear across the room. The back of her neck tingled with an awareness she was determined to ignore but her stomach buzzed with nerves.

Ethan released her and stepped back with a grin. “What are you doing here?”

“She dragged me along for the ride,” Carmela said, throwing a pointed look at Marisol. Marisol had begged her to come to the pub, and to be fair, Marisol had no idea about the tension between her and Sawyer.

Carmela hadn’t said anything and was still ecstatic that Marisol and her brother had gotten together in the first place. So when he’d called home a week ago to inform her and her mom that they’d gotten engaged, they’d both started crying, thrilled that Ethan had chosen someone as awesome as Soli. Also, Carmela knew she was lucky to have a future sister-in-law she’d known for most of her life, let alone someone she genuinely adored.

Ethan blinked at her in surprise. “Really? You flew all the way to Seattle just to see me?”

“No, other way around,” Marisol laughed, winding an arm around his waist and resting her cheek on his chest as he hugged her close. Her brand new diamond engagement ring sparkled in the lights hanging above the bar. “She was flying here anyway, and since I knew you’d be here a couple more days I decided to tag along to surprise you.”

“You made my whole week.” Ethan squeezed his fiancée and threw Carmela a curious look. “So what did you come to Seattle for? Business?”

“No, I’m taking Mom on a cruise to Alaska. It was a last minute thing,” she added when her brother’s eyebrows shot up. “My company offered it to me on Wednesday as a reward for being their top pharmaceutical rep last month.” She shrugged. She’d been in a kind of funk lately over the whole Sawyer thing and hoped this would help get her out of it. “So I took it.”

“Wow, that’s awesome, Carm.”

“Yeah, Mom’s pretty excited.”

“What, and you’re not?”

Sawyer was still over there in by the pool table watching her, she could see him out of the corner of her eye. She refused to acknowledge him again. He’d already hurt her once and she wasn’t going to give him the opportunity to do it again. “I’m looking forward to a holiday and spending time with Mom one-on-one, but you know I don’t like being on a boat. I only accepted it because she’s always wanted to go on a cruise.”

He laughed. “Well this time your ‘boat’ is huge, so you’ll barely notice it moving. Are you going up the Inside Passage?”

“Yes. One way up to Anchorage, then we’re flying back.”

“Then you won’t have a problem with rough water or motion sickness for most of the cruise, since you’ll be in sheltered waters until you head out on the last leg to Anchorage. And the weather’s pretty good this time of year anyhow. You’ll be fine.”

“Yeah, it’ll be great.” Mostly she just hoped the Alaskan ports of call and spectacular scenery would help take her mind off her bruised heart so she could get back to being her happy self again. Because she’d felt anything but bubbly lately, and her friends and coworkers had noticed.

She’d been going nuts at home in Miami, coming back to an empty apartment every night, tormenting herself by remembering every detail about the man she’d stupidly gone and fallen in love with over the past year. So stupid of her.

One-sided love was the
worst
and she had nobody to blame for this situation but herself. Looking back, Sawyer had never given any indication that he wanted anything more than friendship. But he also hadn’t discouraged her when she’d begun flirting with him after he’d broken up with his ex-fiancée. It had given her hope.

And then he’d gone and kissed her. To shut her up.

The humiliation was almost as painful as the ache in her heart. Since that day they hadn’t said a word to each other.

Normally they exchanged e-mails, texted or talked on the phone at least once a week, even before his breakup with Trina. Just checking in with each other, sharing jokes, talking about their favorite TV show. They used to text each other after every episode on Sunday nights to discuss the zombie apocalypse neither one of them could get enough of. Other times she’d tell him something funny about her day, maybe something her mom had done.

So many times she’d thought of him these past few months, picked up her phone to shoot him a message and then remembered they were no longer close and stopped herself. Since that shut-up-kiss, there’d been total radio silence from him. And she sure as hell wasn’t going to be the one to reach out now.

“Have you guys eaten?” Ethan asked her and Marisol, steering them both to the table where some of his teammates sat. Carmela knew them all, since they’d been to her mom’s place in Miami back in June for a cookout.

“No, and we’re starving,” Carmela answered. She took a seat in the chair Schroder pulled out for her, and after they gave their orders, set about making small talk with the guys until the waitress brought their food out.

She ate her spinach salad with bacon and barbecued chicken in silence, painfully aware that Sawyer was now seated at the far end of the long table. He just had this...presence about him that made him impossible to ignore.

When she glanced up and caught him watching her again, she quickly averted her gaze. It hurt way too much to look at him. The small, white gold crucifix necklace he’d given her last Christmas seemed heavy against her skin. It was such a sweet gift, something beautiful just from him and a respectful acknowledgment of her Catholic faith, she couldn’t bear to take it off even if they weren’t on speaking terms anymore.

Ten more minutes, she told herself. That was all she had to get through. She’d finish her meal, put on a smile, say goodbye to everyone, and catch a cab back to the hotel where she could finally relax. Maybe she’d go down to the pool and soak in the hot tub for a bit.

Suddenly Sawyer got up and rounded the end of the table. A quick glance his way warned her he was headed straight for her.

Her stomach fisted tight and she had to force the bite of salad down her throat.

He dragged a chair over from the next table, insinuating himself between her and Marisol. She stiffened as he swung it around and straddled the seat in a casual, masculine pose, resting his thick forearms along the back.

Close enough that there was no way she could ignore him without coming off as a total bitch in front of the others. Then they’d all know something was up and wonder why, and Ethan would start asking questions she’d be forced to lie about.

No thank you. Right now her brother was too wrapped up in Soli to notice something was wrong between her and Sawyer and she hoped it stayed that way.

Sawyer’s big frame seemed to take up all the space beside her, making every cell in her body vibrate with his nearness. His clean, citrusy scent teased her, his sheer size and presence making it impossible to avoid looking at him. When she finally glanced over and met that espresso-brown gaze, a jagged pain tore through her chest. God, the sight of him was like a punch to her senses.

“Hey,” he said softly.

“Hey,” she answered, her tone wooden. She would be polite, but no more than that. He’d hurt her, plain and simple, and hadn’t done a damn thing to rectify that. She wasn’t willing to pretend they were still friends, not even to avoid Ethan’s wrath if he suspected something was up between them and started digging until he found out why.

Fortunately he was still too busy making googly-eyes at his fiancée at the moment to be paying any attention to her. Or anyone else at the table, for that matter.

“So, what brings you to Seattle?” Sawyer asked, the deep timbre of his voice making her belly flip-flop.

“Alaskan cruise with my mom.” For appearance’s sake she gave him an abbreviated version of what she’d told Ethan and left it at that, glancing around the table so she wouldn’t have to look at him any longer than necessary. Oh yeah, she definitely needed a holiday, time to put aside the sadness that had been hanging over her like a little black cloud these past months.

“Oh, wow, that’s good. When does it leave?”

There was no way he didn’t notice her disinterest in talking to him. He was pressing because he wanted her to stop freezing him out. Why? Because he couldn’t stand the thought of her being mad at him?
Too bad, buddy. You do the crime, you do the time.
She wasn’t a woman willing to allow any man to treat her the way he had. “Saturday afternoon.”

In her peripheral she saw him nod. “I’ve always wanted to take that trip. Been to Alaska for mountain training before a couple times, back when I was in the Army. Not the same as having a vacation there though.”

She realized he was extending a verbal peace offering, even put a smile in his voice. Trying to mend the damage he’d done, wanting to just pretend it had never happened and carry on as if everything was normal.

Well too bad for him, because it
had
happened. And dammit, she hated that he’d been totally unaffected by that kiss when she’d been just the opposite. The moment his lips touched hers, the entire world had shifted on its axis for her, a year’s worth of pent-up longing exploding in a single moment of pure bliss. It had taken her only a moment once he’d lifted his head to realize it was anything but the first kiss she’d fantasized about sharing with him.

“No, I guess not.” She grabbed her sparkling water and took a few sips, but it didn’t ease the dryness in her throat. Why had she let Marisol talk her into coming down here?

A taut, uncomfortable silence spread between them. They both focused on other conversations going on around them but didn’t join in, and the awkwardness grew until it was nearly unbearable.

She shifted in her chair, her entire body stiff. God, she couldn’t do this, pretend she didn’t care and didn’t still want him.

She breathed a sigh of relief when the band on stage started up at last, filling the tense void with music. A solid rock and roll beat pulsed through the bar, drawing couples onto the dance floor, including Ethan and Marisol.

Carmela watched them for a minute and tried to suppress the pang of envy she felt. Watching her brother dance with the love of his life, both of them smiling and lost in each other, only emphasized how much she craved the same and how she’d dreamed of finding it with Sawyer. Which only made her feel even more stupid.