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Authors: Nicole Edwards

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“You shouldn’t.”
Ashleigh said after a few moments of silence. “I don’t fault you for caring,
Alex. I just...” She didn’t continue, and Alex didn’t push her. They were
pulling onto Jessie’s street, and he just wanted to get through the next few
minutes because once they were done here, he had some more things he wanted to
tell Ashleigh.

~~*~~

Ashleigh
followed Alex up the driveway to the tiny little house. Her own curiosity had
her glancing around, taking in the outside appearance. The neighborhood wasn’t
fancy, but it was well kept, all of the small houses neatly maintained.

With the
exception of Jessie’s.

The yard was...
well, there was no yard, just brown, crispy grass, long since dead.

She returned her
gaze forward, following Alex up the two small steps to the porch before he
opened the front door and walked right in. He didn’t bother knocking.

Ashleigh was
still reeling from Alex’s story, feeling as though she had been given a glance
into his soul. She may not like the way he ran to Jessie’s rescue, but she
couldn’t fault him for it. He was just that type of man, one any woman should
be proud to be with. They just didn’t make them like Alex anymore.

“Jessie?” Alex
called out as they stopped in the living room.

The house was a
wreck. Empty bottles everywhere, food containers laying on every flat surface
and it reeked to high heaven.

When Alex moved,
Ashleigh followed. Jessie hadn’t answered when Alex called out to her, and a
sudden nervous tension coursed through her. She may not like the woman, though
she had never met her, but she hoped nothing was wrong. Well, other than the
obvious. The woman had a problem.

Alex pushed open
a door at the end of the hall, and Ashleigh stood at his side, unable to see
into the room.

“Fuck!” Alex
huffed. “Put your goddamn clothes on, Jessie.”

Turning away, he
grabbed Ashleigh’s hand and pulled her alongside him.

“Wait! Alex,
please.” Jessie called. “I need you. Please!”

Ashleigh pulled
away, going back to the door and pushing it open with a rush. Before her was a
very naked Jessie, sprawled out on her bed. Well! Apparently the woman needed
Alex, but it had nothing to do with life or death.

“Who are you?”
Jessie asked, sitting up in the bed, but not trying to cover herself.

Ashleigh stared
at the emaciated woman. Jessie had to be in her mid-thirties, based on the math
Ashleigh had done in her head, but she looked closer to fifty. Time definitely
hadn’t been good to the woman. Or maybe it was the drugs and alcohol.

“Get dressed.”
Ashleigh couldn’t believe the anger that had grown to the size of a beach ball
in her chest. “Now.”

Slamming the
door behind her, she walked back to the living room where Alex was standing.

“We should go.”
He told her when she walked into the room.

They should, she
agreed. But that wasn’t going to fix this little problem. “Not until you talk
to her.”

“I don’t want to
fucking talk to her, Ashleigh. You saw what this is about. I don’t have time
for this shit.”

No one did,
Ashleigh knew. “She needs your help.”

“I can’t fix
that
.”
Alex said, his green eyes sparkling with fury.

Before Ashleigh
could say another word, Jessie joined them, at least moderately decent with an
oversized t-shirt and shorts on.

“Sit the fuck
down.” Alex barked at Jessie.

Looking both
pissed and a little remorseful, Jessie did as Alex told her.

“What the hell
is wrong with you, Jessie?” His anger was a living, breathing thing and
Ashleigh knew he needed to calm down before this situation escalated.

“Nothing.”
Jessie cooed. “I just wanted to see you.”

Ashleigh watched
in wide eyed wonder as the woman stared at Alex like he was a lollipop and she
was craving sugar. It was almost as though she had no idea Ashleigh was
standing right there, although they’d been inadvertently introduced not one
minute before.

“Jessie,” Alex
said, thrusting his hand through his hair, “I can’t keep doing this.”

He sounded
defeated, and Ashleigh felt sorry for him in that moment. Maybe there was more
to this situation than she had originally given him credit for. He didn’t look
any happier about being there than Ashleigh was. But, since they were there, it
was time they get some things straight.

“You don’t have
time for me anymore.” Jessie whispered. “I just miss you.”

Alex groaned,
turning his back on her like he couldn’t stand to look at her another second.
Ashleigh didn’t know what to say, but she was getting more and more
uncomfortable with every passing second.

“Does anyone
need a drink?” Jessie asked, sounding bubbly and cheerful, the complete
opposite of just a few seconds ago. Ashleigh was going to have a headache just
trying to keep up with the woman’s personality changes.

“Don’t you
fucking move.” Alex stated adamantly, turning back to face Jessie, but then
looking over at Ashleigh. “We should go.”

Ashleigh
couldn’t have come up with a better plan, but she knew they had to get this
settled, or he would never be at peace. For the last few months, they’d been
tiptoeing around the phone calls that went unanswered and now that they were
presented with the opportunity to do something to fix it, she wanted to jump on
it. If they didn’t, she feared this woman, and her destructive need, was going
to come between them. Something Ashleigh wasn’t willing to let happen.

“Jessie,”
Ashleigh turned to the woman, suddenly more determined than ever, “what do you
need from Alex?”

That surprised
Alex as much as it did the woman sitting on the couch.

“What do you
mean?” She sounded sincerely confused.

“Why do you keep
calling him?” Ashleigh asked, realizing she was totally ill equipped to handle
a situation like this.

“Because he loves
me.” She said, making direct eye contact with Ashleigh.

“He’s your
friend.” Ashleigh confirmed. “But you can’t keep doing this to him.”
Or
yourself
. She kept that last part to herself.

“Doing what?”

“Jessie,” Alex
interrupted, his patience obviously worn thin. “I don’t know how to fix this.”

“There’s nothing
to fix.” Jessie said with a huff. “I just want to see you. I want...”

Ashleigh hung on
the woman’s every word, waiting to hear what it was she wanted. Or rather what
she thought she wanted.

“I want you to
take me back.” Jessie finally said, looking down at her feet. “I need you.”

Alex shot her a
look, and Ashleigh saw the apology in his eyes.

“Have you been
drinking again?” He asked, not moving.

“Yes, I’ve been drinking.”
Jessie yelled, standing up immediately. “It’s the only thing that makes me feel
better.”

Ashleigh wasn’t
sure how this made her feel better. The stench of alcohol and old food filled
the air, singeing her nostrils and making her want to vomit. How Jessie could
live like this, day in and day out was shocking.

“Do you want to
push Alex away?” Ashleigh asked, deciding they were getting nowhere and she
felt entirely too awkward being there. She should have never asked to come
along because it was obvious there was nothing that she could contribute.

“Are you deaf?”
Jessie blurted, turning to face Ashleigh.

“No, I’m not.”
Ashleigh held her ground. “But I know what you’re doing to him. Your frequent
phone calls. Have you not noticed he doesn’t answer the phone?”

“That’s just
because you’re there. If he was alone, he’d answer my calls. He always does.”

Ashleigh wasn’t
so sure anymore.

“You need to go
back to rehab.” Alex stated, coming to stand beside Ashleigh, putting his arm
around her. The warmth of his body, his apparent need to hold her close was
comforting.

“Fuck you.”
Jessie screamed, turning vicious. “She’s turning you against me. The fucking
bitch –”

“Don’t.” Alex’s
stern tone had Jessie flinching.

Ashleigh put a
hand on Alex’s arm and took a step closer to Jessie. “He’s your friend, you
know that, right? He cares about you. Even I know that.” She did. “But you’re
tearing him apart, Jessie. Do you really want to do that to your friend?”

“He’s my
husband.” She argued.

“No.” Ashleigh
said defensively. “He’s not your husband. He was at one time, but not anymore.”
Taking another step closer, Ashleigh continued. “If you want him to be your
friend, you’ve got to get some help. Like today.”

“I don’t want
him to be my friend. I want him to be my husband.” Jessie clenched her hands
into fists. “That means you need to leave.”

“It’s not going
to happen.” Alex said, inserting himself between the two women. “I love her,
Jessie.”

Ashleigh’s heart
seized.
He what?

“I’ve always
loved her.” Alex continued. “I don’t want to choose between being your friend,
and being with her because I will choose her, Jessie. Do you hear what I’m
telling you? There is nothing that you can say or do that will get me to love
you that way. I care about you. I’ll always care about you, but I can’t keep
doing this.”

Jessie sobbed,
the sudden look of sheer disbelief contorting her sickly features. The woman
was too thin and based on the state of their surroundings she probably wasn’t
getting much nourishment. Unless of course the various types of liquor she
consumed had enough calories to sustain life.

Alex took a step
closer to Jessie, tilting her chin up so she had to look at him. “Go to rehab.
For me.” He paused. “Please.”

Ashleigh watched
as Jessie seemed to crumble at his feet, but she never actually moved. Whatever
she felt for Alex, whether it was based on true love, or just a deep need to be
loved, Jessie was giving in to his plea.

~~*~~

“I’m sorry you
had to be here.” Alex said as they walked out to his truck. For the last two
hours, they’d seen multiple sides of Jessie, ranging from hurt to rage and
varying degrees in between.

At least she was
going to get the help she needed. The help he never could give her. No matter
how many times she’d said she would stop drinking, he knew she needed the
professional help he couldn’t provide. This would be her second stint in rehab,
and thanks to his brief conversation with one of the counselors, he now knew
how to help his friend.

“I’m not.”
Ashleigh told him, leaning into him. “I’m sorry she’s sick.”

And that’s what
the counselor had told them. Alcoholism was a disease; one Jessie had no
fighting chance of overcoming on her own.

“Do you want me
to take you home?” He asked, realizing their day had been thrown so far off
course, Alex wasn’t sure it would get back on track at that point.

“Sure.” She
answered, sounding unsure.

And that’s what
Alex did. He drove Ashleigh home, dropping her off and feeling at a total loss
without her with him. Instead of coming in, he stayed in his truck. His emotions
were all over the place, and it didn’t get past him that he had admitted how he
felt about Ashleigh, and she’d never said a word about it.

Chapter Twenty
Seven

***
~~ *** ~~ *** ~~ ***

One week later,
Ashleigh found herself going stir crazy. Since the day of Jessie’s incident,
she hadn’t heard from Alex. He’d dropped her off at the house, and because
they’d been riddled with emotional churn for the better part of the day, she’d
decided to leave him alone for a little while. Now she was beginning to
question her decision.

Maybe he hadn’t
meant what he said after all. And yes, she remembered every last word.

I’ve always
loved her. I don’t want to choose between being your friend, and being with her
because I will choose her, Jessie.

She couldn’t get
the conversation out of her head. Why hadn’t he said anything? Alex had never
given her the impression that what they had between them was anything more than
some intense sex and a budding friendship. They had become close over the last
few months, and the sex was phenomenal.

After the day
he’d picked her up at the bookstore, Ashleigh had had high hopes that he was
opening up to her once again. He had even asked her about becoming a member of
the club, and she had acquiesced. Grinning on the inside, of course.

And now, as it
would appear, he’d withdrawn from her both emotionally and physically. At least
that was the impression she got from him.

Granted, she
could call him just as easily as he could call her. And she hadn’t.

No, she’d been
reeling from his admission, wondering how in the hell she hadn’t seen it. Or
how she hadn’t been able to tell him exactly how she felt about him. How she
had always felt about him.

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