Seducing Simon (23 page)

“But I want to rectify that Toni. I want to take things to the next level.

But before we do that, there are things we need to talk about. Things we need to get out in the open.”

She looked at him with all the weight of her guilt bearing down on her harder all the time. Soon she’d be unable to breathe at all. She opened her mouth to speak, but all words fled her like a speeding bullet.

“Toni,” he prompted gently. “I need to know about the father of your baby.”

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Maya Banks

She felt very close to fainting. Simon must have registered the shock she was feeling because he leaned forward, framing her face in his hands. “Don’t be afraid, sweetheart. We need to talk about this though.

Get it off your chest. We need to determine how this affects our future.

I’m not going anywhere. But we need to get this out in the open.” She closed her eyes, tears slipping down her cheeks. After everything it had come down to this. The man she was desperately in love with was sitting in front of her prepared to propose, and she was set to drive a knife in his back.

“I don’t even know how to tell you this,” she said choking back a sob.

“Honey, you need to calm down. I had no idea this would upset you so badly. This isn’t how I pictured the evening going at all.” He paused a moment and ran a hand through his hair. “Would you prefer we talk about it another time?”

“No! I mean…no. I had planned to tell you tonight anyway. It’s why I invited you over.” She sucked in her breath until it made her feel lightheaded.

She was too close to him. She stood up, his hands dropping from her arms. A few steps away from the couch, she turned around, daring to look at him. His eyes were alight in confusion and intense curiosity.

“Do you remember the night you and Starla broke up?” she asked.

Surprise registered on his face. “Yes, of course.”

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Seducing Simon

“You came home upset. You’d had something to drink. Then I sat up with you while you got drunker.”

“Yeah, I remember,” he said, looking away. “Not the proudest moment of my life.”

“Nor was it mine,” she whispered. “We had sex that night.” She watched disbelief then shock creep across his face. “Are you saying…are you saying I put a move on you?” he asked hoarsely. “Oh my God,” he whispered before she could answer. “Are you saying I took advantage of you when I was drunk?” Self-loathing clouded his voice, his anguish her undoing.

“No!” she sobbed out. “That isn’t the way it happened. Simon, I wanted it to happen. I encouraged you. I kissed you and it went from there. I knew you had no idea what you were doing. I had this fantasy built up in my mind. I knew exactly what I was doing, and I seduced you.”

He sat shaking his head in utter disbelief. Then he paled, all the color fading from his face in a rush. “The baby. It’s
mine
?” She shook her head miserably.

He stared at her in horror. “And you never told me? You let me go all these months and the baby is mine?”

Again she nodded, unable to speak. Her hands shook violently as she awaited the explosion.

“How
could
you?” Revulsion twisted his face. “Jesus. I can’t believe it.

Not you, Toni. I trusted you. Tell me you didn’t do this. Didn’t keep something so important from me.”

She pressed her knuckles to her mouth unable to hold back the sobs any longer.

He waved his hand in front of him. “This game. This charade you put on. The flirting. The effort to make me jealous. Was it real? Or did you

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Maya Banks

just fear you wouldn’t have a father for you baby? Damn it, Toni. Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice rose and he stood up, his fists clenched by his side. “Has this all been just one gigantic joke to you? Have you been laughing at me behind my back all this time? You despise Starla so much, but you’re no better than her. My God, I
trusted
you.” The pain in his face, his eyes, his voice sliced through her like the sharpest blade. “Simon, it wasn’t like that,” she began.

“Then tell me, Toni. What was it like?” His bitter words rang across the room.

“I was afraid,” she admitted. “Afraid of messing things up between us, afraid of messing things up between all four of us.”

“I see, and keeping the fact that you slept with me, much less that you were pregnant with my child from me isn’t messing things up?”

“It was wrong,” she said softly.

“It wasn’t just wrong, Toni. It was despicable. I honestly never thought you were capable of such deceit. I am certainly not proud of the fact I had sex with a woman and apparently can’t remember it, much less that it was with my supposed best friend, but what you did was unthinkable. You should have told me.
Immediately
. There was no reason for you to have gone through any of it alone.” She turned away, her head aching from the tears she’d cried. She heard him walk across the floor, and she whirled around in time to see him walk out the front door. “Simon!” she called out, racing to the door.

“Don’t go. We need to talk.”

He paused on the porch and slowly turned around to face her. What she saw in his eyes made her flinch. “I don’t have anything to say to you, Toni.”

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Seducing Simon

She froze at the anger, the hatred in his voice. As he walked away, her heart shattered into a million pieces. She watched in agony as he drove off. Out of her life.

She stood there for a long time, numb to the cold. Numb to anything but the searing pain in her chest. Then she slowly turned and walked back into the house.

Simon pounded the steering wheel in rage. Tears nearly blinded his vision as he tore down the road. How could she have betrayed him like this? Never would he have put her in the same category as Starla. But to allow him to go to the doctor’s visits with her, pursue a relationship with him, all the while pregnant with his child.
His child
.

He’d never felt so angry, so utterly pissed off in his life. Her deception was unthinkable. And it made him sick to his stomach that the woman he loved and wanted to spend the rest of his life with had lied to him from the beginning of their relationship.

He pulled into the driveway of his house and slammed out of the truck. His mood was black, and he’d never hurt as much as he did at this moment. His fingers curled around the box the engagement ring was nestled in. In an angry motion he sent it flying across the kitchen as he stepped in the door.

“Whoa, dude.” A.J. stepped back as Simon made his entrance.

Simon cursed under his breath. No one was supposed to be home.

From the living room, he heard Matt get up and join them in the kitchen.

Was the whole bloody world staying home tonight?

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Maya Banks

“What’s going on?” Matt asked with a frown as he leaned against the bar.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he managed to grit out. He closed his eyes, vowing not to shed a single tear in front of the guys.

“I take it the evening didn’t go as planned,” A.J. said quietly.

“Observant aren’t you,” Simon snarled.

“What the hell are you two talking about?” Matt demanded. “As usual, I’m in the dark.”

“She say no?” A.J. pressed.

“I didn’t ask,” he replied bitterly.

“Why do I get the feeling you two are talking about Toni,” Matt said in a dangerous tone. “One of you better spill it.” Anger swelled and overflowed, exploding out of him before he could call it back. “Your sister is a lying, conniving bitch.” Matt’s jaw dropped open then a dangerous glint surfaced in his eyes.

He advanced on Simon, his expression murderous. A.J. didn’t look any happier, but at least he was keeping his distance.

“You better have a damn good reason for calling my sister names,” Matt said softly.

“Who’s the father?” A.J. asked, correctly perceiving the source of his anger.

“I am,” he spat out, thumbing himself in the chest.

“What the…” Matt began.

“Say what?” A.J. sputtered. “Say that again?” In sparse words, he related the events of the night he and Starla had broken up. By the time he finished, A.J.’s mouth was on the floor, and Matt had sunk down on a barstool.

“What was she thinking?” Matt asked in disbelief. “That’s about the most hare-brained thing she’s ever managed.”

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Seducing Simon

A.J. remained silent as he stared between the two of them. Simon threw open the fridge and popped a beer. He took a long swig then looked at it in disgust. This is what got him into this situation in the first place.

He glanced back over at A.J. who stood staring at him. “Did you break up with her?” he asked.

“Break up with her? Breaking up implies a relationship of sorts,” Simon said with a snort. “Apparently I was under the mistaken impression we had a relationship. I couldn’t have been more wrong.” Matt shook his head. “I can’t believe she would do something like that.”

“I don’t think it’s fair to gang up on her,” A.J. said quietly. “We’ve only heard Simon’s side of things.”

Simon whirled and pinned A.J. with the full force of his glare. “You think I would lie about something like this?”

“Not at all,” he returned mildly. “But we haven’t heard Toni’s reasons for doing what she did. I for one don’t think it’s any of my business, therefore, I refuse to pass judgment.”

“It was a stupid thing to do,” Matt insisted.

“I don’t think stupid covers it,” Simon muttered.

“Look, I know you’re blown away by this,” A.J. began. “Who wouldn’t be? But my advice is to sit on it a few days. Don’t make any decisions you’ll regret later. I refuse to think Toni did this maliciously.”

“You’re entitled to your opinion, A.J. But tell me this. Why the hell didn’t she tell me when she found out she was pregnant? I can almost understand why she didn’t say anything about us going to bed together.

It’s certainly not something I’m proud of. But when she found out she was pregnant she should have told me immediately. I had the
right
to know.”

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Maya Banks

“Just don’t do anything you’ll regret,” A.J. repeated as he headed toward his room.

“Sorry, man,” Matt offered.

“Yeah, me too.” He turned and retreated to his room, shutting the door on his disillusionment.

The wind blew cold off the water, biting through the thin shirt she wore. Toni sat on the sand, her knees hugged to her swollen belly. The water rolled closer as the tide swept in, but still she didn’t move, her gaze fixed on a distant point on the horizon.

She’d driven aimlessly until she found herself heading down the interstate toward the coast. She and Simon had sat on this very beach watching the sun go down on their first date. It seemed a lifetime ago.

Tears she didn’t think she had left slipped down her cheek, burning a single trail of despair. By now Matt and A.J. would know what had happened. Matt would be angry that she had acted so rashly. She had no idea what A.J. would think. He’d probably be hurt that she hadn’t confided in him. But most of all, Simon was lost to her. She would never get over that.

And she had nobody to blame but herself.

How could she face any of them? Her heart ached. Heavy and hurting. How could she pick up and go on? No matter that her relationship with Simon was over, when he calmed down, he would want to be a part of their baby’s life. The worst kind of torture would be being tied to him through their child, having to be near him and knowing he hated her.

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Seducing Simon

She laid her head forward on her arms and let deep welling sobs escape her. She sounded hoarse and raw, but she didn’t care. She’d not only lost the man she loved, she’d lost her best friend as well.

She stayed there through the night, staring out over the great expanse of water. The tide came in. The tide went out. Before long, the sun started to peep up, bathing the beach in soft light. And still she sat, huddled on the sand with only her regrets to keep her warm.

She knew she needed to get to a phone. Call Doc and tell him she wouldn’t be in, but she couldn’t bring herself to move. With a frown, she checked her watch, her bleary eyes registering that it was past seven.

Sighing, she stretched her cramped legs and struggled to get up.

Whatever her difficulties, she owed it to Doc to at least give him a call.

He’d worry if she didn’t show up.

She drove further down the peninsula and stopped at a gas station to use a payphone. She left word with Marnie, not bothering to expound on her reason for missing work. As she slid back into her Jeep, she gripped the steering wheel, gritting her teeth to keep the tears at bay. Her head felt like a cabbage, and her eyes were swollen and raw.

No idea where to go, but she wasn’t going home. Not yet. She didn’t want to be anywhere near Simon. The disgust in his eyes had nearly killed her. Never had she imagined him looking at her like that.

She finally turned her Jeep toward the ferry, arriving fifteen minutes later. She got right on and sat in her car while the ferry crossed the bay.

It was cold. It was miserable. The weather was a perfect match for her mood.

Once in Galveston, she stopped at a fast food joint and grabbed breakfast, though her stomach rebelled at the idea of food. She then parked along the seawall and sat in her Jeep watching the waves roll in.

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Maya Banks

She didn’t need to be a rocket scientist to figure out she’d screwed up royally.

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Seducing Simon

A.J. replaced the phone on the base and looked over at Matt. “I don’t like it. She’s still not there.”

“She’s probably just not answering her phone,” Matt suggested.

“No, I drove by there this morning. Her Jeep wasn’t there and she’s not at work.”

“Well, she screwed up, man. I mean she’s my sister, and I love her, but she’s screwed the pooch this time. Maybe she decided to hide out for a few days.”

A.J. frowned. “Dude, she’s pregnant and probably upset as hell. You saw Simon. I doubt he just quietly walked away. Pull your head out of your ass. You and I have no reason to be angry with her.” Matt’s eyes flashed. “She could have ruined our friendship. Hell, she probably already has. I doubt seriously Simon’s going to want to hang around much anymore if she’s here.”