Second Skin (22 page)

Plus, the Skin was killing me. At this point, I was basically vacuum-sealed.

One thing was certain, I decided, as the car pulled up. I wasn't confused. Not anymore.

I'd had it. I wanted out. Out of the Skin. Out of pep squad. Out of my unrelationship with Tanner.

I wanted my life back. My real life.

I wanted Gwen and-with an intensity that was almost frightening-I wanted Alex.

I climbed out of the car, wondering if there was anything I could do, short of time travel, to get Gwen and Alex to forgive me.

And then, as if on cue, there they were. Standing on Kylie Frank's front porch. I watched, completely frozen, as Alex (my Alex) and Gwen (my Gwen) stood joking around with Kylie and Ella. They looked as if they'd been friends for years.

Jealousy descended, weaving its way through the Skin and into my pores. Obviously, this was some sort of setup. Kylie Frank's idea of revenge.

I couldn't see straight. I wasn't thinking. I know that doesn't excuse what I did next, but please-just keep it in mind.

As Alex's car, with Gwen and Ella in it, backed out of the driveway, I felt myself hurtling toward the porch as fast as a body bound in synthetic skin could move.

"That's so low!" I yelled. I tried to storm up the stairs but, since bending my knees was sort of impossible, had to settle for a much less intimidating hop. "I can't believe you!"

Kylie's eyes widened with surprise, then, as she recovered, started to flash. "What are you talking about?" she snapped.

"Oh, like you don't know," I countered. "Look, I'm sorry things haven't been exactly going your way, but you don't have to use my friends to get back at me."

"What? We just ran into each other at-" She stopped midsentence and seemed to give herself a little shake. "You know what?" she hissed. "I don't have to explain myself to you. Get off my porch."

I tossed a final poisonous look her way and started to hop back down the stairs. And that was when it hit. A thought so painful it made my heart hurt. "I suppose you and Alex are like a
thing
now, right?" I screamed. My voice was shrill and shaking. "Is that what this is all about? Punishment for Tanner?"

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I knew I was wrong. And I also knew I'd gone too far.

Kylie flew in front of me. "How dare you! You're the one who runs around taking friends and boyfriends without even thinking about it!" Her face twisted with anger. "I never did anything to you except trust you with one secret, which you..."

She turned away from me and pulled open the door. "You know what? You're not worth it. Just forget it."

I watched as she stomped back inside the house. And that was when I snapped. I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted out.

"Okay!" I cried as I followed her. "You're right. I'm sorry!"

Kylie froze, then turned slowly around to face me. "For what?" she asked, her voice suspicious.

I took a deep breath and did something I hadn't done in ages.

I told the truth.

I started to cry. Fat, sloppy tears rolled down my face and into my mouth. "I don't want the Skin anymore," I sputtered. "You can have it. I just want it off."

Kylie looked at me. "Why? What are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to mess up your life." The words rushed out as if spurting from a

Kylie folded her arms protectively across her chest. "And you thought the best way to be me was to steal the Skin and ruin my life," she said. "Because you did ruin my life. You know that, right?"

I nodded. "I didn't mean to. That part just sort of...happened. I just wanted to be popular. I was obsessed." I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand. "But not anymore. I mean it. I want to be myself again...." I trailed off, wondering who, exactly, that was.

Kylie looked at me, her face inscrutable. "So take it off and give it back."

"I've tried," I said, sniffling loudly. "I can't. It's stuck." I reached through the sleeve of my dress and pulled at the Skin. "I...Look...that day in your room you said something about a list of rules and a user's manual....If you could just-"

Kylie snorted. "Please. Why would I even
consider
helping you?"

"I know," I said. "But how about this. If you help me, you can have the Skin back. Seriously. It's yours."

"And I should believe you because...?"

I sighed. "You shouldn't. I'm the last person

Slowly, as if moving in some sort of time warp, Kylie unfolded her arms. "Fine." She turned and headed silently up the stairs. I decided not to wait for an invitation and followed.

Kylie's bedroom was different now. The friendship collages were gone, as was the shot of her and Tanner. The only pictures in the room were a photo-booth strip of her and Ella and a large framed picture of a guy in a soccer uniform.

Kylie's eyes followed mine. "It's nothing serious," she said quickly. "We're sort of taking things slow."

I smiled at her. "I hope it works out."

She stared at me for a few seconds, then turned abruptly and cut across the room, stopping in front of her desk. Reaching into the first drawer, she pulled out a single piece of paper and held it out. "Here."

I glanced down at the plain white sheet,

1. RESPECT THE SECOND SKIN AND IT WILL RESPECT YOU.

2. ONLY ONE SKIN IS PERMITTED PER SCHOOL.

3.
DO NOT TELL ANYONE ABOUT THE SECOND SKIN.*

4.
THE SECOND SKIN MUST NOT BE REMOVED FOR LONGER THAN FOUR HOURS AT

ANY ONE TIME.

PLEASE SEE MANUAL FDR REMOVAL AND CARE GUIDELINES.

*(Since the Skin is invisible, you need not worry about embarrassing locker room scenarios. It is advised, however, that communal dressing rooms be avoided. Skin or no Skin, they're simply unpleasant.)

I read through the list once, then twice more. Each time, I could feel new lines popping up on my forehead.

Kylie shrugged. "Well, I broke rule three and look what happened to me." She shot me a look. "You being a total jerk helped, of course."

Ignoring her, I stared down at the list. "But it doesn't tell me what I'm supposed to do."

Kylie groaned. "Not that this is in anyway my problem, but in the interest of getting you out of my room as fast as possible, I'll give it a stab." She glanced over my shoulder, chewing on her lower lip as her eyes moved down the paper. "I don't know. Maybe you didn't respect the Skin? I mean, you did steal it." She leaned over and sniffed my arm, wrinkling her nose in distaste. "And you definitely didn't wash it enough. That thing's filthy. I really wish you'd swiped the care guide."

"Uh, thanks," I said, handing the paper back.

Kylie shrugged again. "Whatever."

"Look," I said. "I really am sorry."

Kylie turned away. "Why don't you go home and see if you can get it off? Then we'll talk," she said, her back stiff.

I hopped down the stairs and out onto the front porch. The Skin felt so tight I wondered if I even looked three-dimensional anymore. It was a geometry problem only Alex could solve.

Alex.

My heart twisted. How was I going to fix this?

"Wait, I don't get it," he said. He was holding the phone way too close to his mouth and his words came out all warped and breathy.

"I think we should break up," I repeated, resisting the urge to wipe off the receiver.

There was a pause on the other end of the line, followed by a few more obscene-phone-caller-type exhales (was he doing stomach

I tried a different approach. "I just don't think we have a whole lot in common. You like sports and I like..."

I trailed off, wondering what exactly I did like. Thanks to the Skin, I'd learned a lot about what I didn't like and wasn't good at: partying, gossiping, any activity that involved a midriff-baring uniform. But what did I really enjoy? I jogged my memory, trying to remember which, if any, of the millions of responsibilities I'd juggled over the past few months
hadn't
made me want to impale myself on a baton.

The word triggered a slide show in my head, filled with Spring Fling constellations. I smiled at the memory of all that sketching, painting and glittering. It had been hard. But I'd enjoyed it. And I'd done a good job.

"Art," I finished. "I'm an-I'm sort of an artist."

"Well," Tanner said uncertainly. "That's cool. Maybe you could decorate my lacrosse jersey. Something different, you know? I could leave it for the school when I graduate."

Okay, third time's the charm. I gave it another shot. "There are a million girls out there who'd die to go out with you," I told him.